Elements
by CrazedLunatic
Summary: A collection of drabbles and prompts taking place at some point during the WBUCT/LTC verse. They are posted in no particular order and do contain spoilers for LTC and future stories.
1. Finn Walks In On Kurt and Blaine

Elements

By: CrazedLunatic

**Disclaimer: I do not own Glee or anything affiliated with it.**

"OH MY GOD!"

"_WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE, FINN?" _Kurt shrieked, pulling away from Blaine with record speed and pulling his pants up.

Blaine stared at their doorway, mouth hanging open and hazel eyes wide. _Pants. Pull up your pants. Right._

"WHAT ARE YOU TWO _DOING_?"

"Oh God, he's going to kill me." Blaine hissed, quickly buttoning his pants. Was this what it was like before one died? He wasn't seeing his life flash before his eyes. Instead, he just saw the Jolly Green Giant in his doorway glaring daggers at him. He was pretty sure _Burt _would have looked less homicidal than Finn.

"What are we doing? It is _our house_ and we can do whatever we want! Why did you just come in?" Kurt exclaimed. What was it with people going in and out? Wes, David, and Finn were all three _horrible _about just wandering in. This is why they needed a better hiding place for their key. But _nooo_.

"No! What were you two doing?!" Finn repeated, looking pale. "Does Burt know about this?"

"Does my father know I was trying to have sex? No! Do you broadcast your sex life to Carole?"

"Does he know you're not a virgin?" Finn questioned, completely ignoring Kurt's question.

"Of course he knows that we have sex. He's not an idiot. Blaine and I have dated for four years!"

"And he's okay with _that_?"

"_Can you shut the door_?" Kurt growled as he heard another apartment door open.

Finn did as told, not looking away from both Kurt and a still shirtless Blaine. "That was really _sex_?"

"It was an attempt." Blaine mumbled, and shrank back into the couch when Finn gave him a very scary look.

"You two shouldn't be—he's my little brother—."

"I'm twenty-one, Finn." Kurt scoffed. "And I've had sex since I was—."

"Let's not go there, Kurt." Blaine elbowed. Maybe, though, he shouldn't talk. He was tiny. Maybe Finn would forget he was there. He had never seen this side of Finn before. It was unsettling.

"But you… and you… you two don't have _sex_." Finn sputtered, looking dumbfounded.

"What do you think you just saw?" Kurt asked.

"You two use protection and stuff, right?" Finn asked slowly, eyeing both of them.

"Finn, you are _not _my father."

"Yeah, Burt would kill Blaine for doing that to you!"

"Dad knows we have sex." Kurt said irritably. "I just told you that."

"I thought you meant that he assumed… You mean he knows you do _that?_"

"He has known since I was—."

"If you tell him how long we've been having sex he will murder me. Do you _want _to be single?" Blaine hissed.

"That's preposterous. Finn, I've been having sex since I was eighteen."

"You've been having sex since before Rachel and I started having sex? Not cool!"

"Sorry that you decided to date someone who is a prude, but yes. I have been having sex with Blaine since I was eighteen." Kurt said, well aware Blaine was trying to literally shrink into the couch. "Blaine, stop. He's not going to do anything."

"How could you do that, dude?" Finn asked Blaine.

"Uhm… well… I'm a guy with needs too… You know…"

"Don't you try to intimidate him." Kurt snapped at Finn. "It wasn't a big deal to you that Puck has sex."

"Puck isn't my little brother and Puck also isn't having sex with one of my close friends." Finn shot back. "And really, though. Protection? 'Cause you know, AIDS can kill."

Blaine couldn't help it. He let out a loud laugh, slapping his hand over his mouth. He really should have helped it, though, because he was pretty sure Finn was plotting his untimely death judging by the looks Blaine was getting.

"What's so funny about that, dude? Do you two _want _to die?"

"I cannot believe I am legally related to this person." Kurt shook his head. "Finn, you don't get AIDS from gay sex. You have to have sex with someone who already has the disease. By having sex with someone who has AIDS. We are both AIDS and STD free, thank you very much. Care to find another way to insult both of us in our own homes?"

"Are you sure he's been tested? Some dudes will lie, Kurt." Finn said very seriously, looking Blaine up and down.

"Would you like to see his medical records?" Kurt scoffed.

"Did _you _see them? I'm trying to look out for you." Finn's expression was still serious. "Blaine, you better not be fooling around with other people 'cause me, Puck, Mike, and Artie can kick some serious ass when we want."

Kurt heaved a big sigh, straightening his crooked shirt. "Are you done yet, Finn?"

"Was your… really… in his…?" Finn asked.

"Was his penis in my ass?" Kurt repeated. "We can use big boy words, Finn. It's _sex_."

"But I didn't know gay people actually did _it_. I thought you just jerked off in front of each other… Doesn't that hurt?"

"Well, not generally." Blaine shrugged. "Unless, you know, we want it too—which we don't." he added quickly, seeing Finn's horrified facial expression. "We don't do stuff like that!"

Kurt opened his mouth but Blaine elbowed him, hard.

"Just plain old boring gay sex… _Finn, don't kill me!"_

* * *

**Alright, this is a collection of drabbles. The title I have chosen for this is, obviously, _Elements_. My reasoning is that elements are part of a whole. As in, these are parts of the story. Just parts that haven't shown up in them yet.**

**Unless stated at the beginning of a drabble in an author's note, these all take place at some point in the WBUCT/LTC verse. I've written them over the last two years so actual years or times, small facts like that, may not line up because plots have changed as the stories have evolved. (For instance, in some Melody is aged 4 when in canon she'd really be 7, stuff like that.)**

**Warning: There will be spoilers in some of these drabbles including, but not limited to, their children, outcomes of certain plotlines mentioned in passing in LTC or future stories, etc. If you do not want overall story plotlines spoiled, I'd suggest you not read this until all four stories for this verse are posted. I will post a warning for each chapter containing Klaine babies, though, because I realize some people want that to be a surprise. **

**I'll be posting these in no particular order. These are all posted on my Tumblr but people have asked me to post them on here and I finally am! Hopefully you'll enjoy them. I have 96 posted on my blog, I believe, and I'll slowly be adding them in. I hope you enjoyed this one and I'll try to have the next one out tomorrow!**


	2. Picnic

**The timing in this drabble does not take place with the posted LTC so don't put too much thought into that aspect of this!**

"Come on, Mellie!" Kurt called.

"Wait for me! Wait for me!" Melody called running across the room and wrapping her arms around his leg. "Hi, Kurt!"

"Hey there, sweetie." Kurt laughed. "We have to hurry if we want to make it to Blaine's work in time for his lunch."

"I'm glad Mommy talked Daddy into letting me stay. I like it here!" Melody chirped, taking a basket containing food for a picnic in her left hand.

"I know, but hold my hand." Kurt locked the door to their apartment and then held out his hand.

Melody reached up and swung their hands together as they walked. "Mommy wants to know when you are Blaine are going to get married!"

"Well one of us has to propose first." Kurt snorted.

"You should do that." Melody giggled.

"Alright, Miss Bossy Pants. I'll propose over our ham and cheese sandwiches." Kurt giggled too.

"But Blaine's is turkey because he doesn't like ham." Melody said knowingly. "Why doesn't he like ham?"

"Because he's just plain weird." Kurt ruffled her hair and squeezed her hand.

"Mommy says you and Blaine walk everywhere. Don't your feet hurt?" Melody asked, tilting her head.

"Nah. We're pretty close to stuff. Plus, Blaine needs to exercise as much as he can with all the snacks he eats."

Melody giggled again. "When you were at work last night he took me for cheesecake."

"Traitor!" Kurt gasped, the hand that wasn't holding hers going to his heart.

Melody giggled. "He said you'd say that, Kurt."

"Well he does know me better than anybody." Kurt sighed and shook his head. "Getting cheesecake without me. And you _letting _him."

"I'm sorry." Melody said, grinning at him. "He made me do it."

"That's what they all say." Kurt mock sighed. "Here we are."

"Blaine's work is pretty!" Melody gasped, letting go of his hand.

"Hey, don't do that. There are lots of people in there." Kurt said, taking her hand and walking to the door with her.

"What's that?" Melody asked.

"It's a picture of the building that… well… It's a picture of the place where Blaine's bosses work." Kurt explained. "They've got one big place and then this one."

"It's like the daddy?"

"Sort of." Kurt said, steering clear of three lawyers walking in a big group. "Let's go to Blaine's office."

"I bet he's hungry." Melody chirped as they went into an office.

"Hey there." Kurt grinned. "We come bearing food."

"BLAINE!" Melody squealed running into the room, running behind the desk, and jumping onto Blaine's lap. She wrapped her arms around his neck as he laughed and then looked at someone sitting in front of his desk before asking, "Who are _you_?"

"That would be my boss." Blaine said.

"It's his lunch time." Melody said, kissing Blaine's cheek.

"If the lady says it's lunch time, it must be lunch time." Blaine's boss, Bob laughed and stood.

"Oh, God." Kurt said, covering his face.

"Hello, Mr. Hummel." Bob said kindly as he excused himself.

"Melody," Blaine laughed. "You're going to get me in trouble."

"Nuh-uh. Old men think I'm cute." Melody said sweetly. "Uh oh, where'd the basket go?"

Kurt held it up, still looking embarrassed. "Sorry. I guess we should have knocked."

"We weren't talking about work." Blaine reassured him. "Is that a picnic basket?"

"Yes." Kurt smiled. "Melody wanted to have a picnic with both of us. Since you work all day, this was the best alternative."

"Yours is turkey! The sandwich! Because you hate ham, you weirdo!" Melody said. "Let's go, please!"

"Okay, okay." Blaine took his suit jacket off, laid it across the back of his seat, and made his way over to them. "But stay close when we walk out. There are a lot of people here."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know." Melody sighed. "You two are worse than mommy."

"It's a very big city." Kurt said as Blaine took Melody's hand. "There are a lot more people in New York City than in Lima, sweetie."

"Hmph." Melody huffed as Blaine leaned over her to kiss Kurt. "We need a no kissing rule."

"I am so very sorry." Kurt teased, leaving the building. Once they reached the nearest park they all three sat down and Kurt began passing out the food. "Is it busy?"

"Eh. I'm not. They're not giving me a lot of cases at the same time. Bob thinks I can handle it but they're still trying to ease me in." Blaine shrugged, biting into his sandwich.

"LOOK! LOOK!" Melody squealed, jumping up and down as she pointed. "IT'S A HORSE AND CARRIAGE! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

Kurt's eyes widened in shock as Blaine laughed loudly.

"I think we know what we can do with you tonight, pumpkin."

"REALLY? REALLY AND TRULY?" Melody asked, throwing her arms around his neck. "THANK YOU THANK YOU!"

"Oh God, you're getting heavy." Blaine teased, easing her down.

"Nuh-uh." Melody giggled and sat back down with her sandwich which Kurt was holding out for her.

"We can go there after Dylan's Candy Bar—."

Melody's eyes glazed over at her brother's words.

"And Blaine wants to take you to the Sony Wonder Technology Lab—."

Melody squeaked.

"And tomorrow we're going to ride the Staten Island Ferry."

"I NEVER WANNA LEAVE!" Melody squealed. "DON'T MAKE ME GO HOME!"

"What about Mommy?" Kurt asked, poking her leg. "Hmm?"

"Mommy and Daddy can come too."

"And stay in my and Blaine's tiny apartment?" Kurt snorted.

"Uh huh. Mommy and Daddy are potty trained and well-behaved. That's more than I can say for Kreacher." Melody said very seriously, slapping her hand against Blaine's when he raised it for a high-five.

"You two are horrible." Kurt sighed as he finished his sandwich and looked around. "Sometimes I think you're supposed to be related to Blaine, Mellie."

Blaine nudged Melody several times, grinning. "What say you, pumpkin?"

Melody giggled. "l still say you're my brother when people ask."

"Aw, do you?" Blaine said, smiling happily.

"Yep!" Melody finished her food and hopped up.

"Stay close!" Kurt called as he scooted up to Blaine.

"I know!" Melody said, running a few feet away and then running back, sliding up to them on her knees.

"Your pants." Kurt cringed. "Oh, Mellie, why?"

"Oh yeah. Daddy said to not do that in front of you. Whoops." Melody shrugged. "You two should hold hands!"

"I can see the resemblance between you and Kurt." Blaine teased as he laced his and Kurt's fingers together. "But, Miss Melody, I was going to do it anyway."

"Good 'cause mommy and daddy are married and they hold hands. So is Rachel and Finn and they do too. But all you two do is gross kisses." Melody pulled a face. "But if you hold hands, you'll have to get married."

"Married?" Blaine questioned.

"Yeah, I'm trying to just go with it." Kurt shrugged. "I think Carole put her up to this."

"And Daddy. Daddy says Blaine's like you and Finn to them and that if you two don't get married, he's just gonna adopt Blaine." Melody informed them.

"Yeah, Kurt." Blaine teased, nudging him with his elbow. "When we gon' get hitched?"

"If you ever fake a country accent like that again? Never."


	3. Blaine Would Never Cheat

"I wish you would just tell me what's wrong so I can apologize and we could move on to the make up sex." Blaine sighed, shrugging out of his suit jacket.

"You didn't do anything wrong." Kurt, who was sitting on the bed and folding clothes, sighed also.

"What? I didn't?" Blaine asked, looking genuinely pleased. "Okay. Then what did happen? Did _you _do something? The make-up sex is always better when _you're _the one who did something wrong."

Kurt narrowed his eyes at Blaine.

"Okay, sorry." Blaine said, toeing off his shoes.

"I guess I should be glad you're still eager for sex. That must mean you're not getting it elsewhere."

Blaine, who was trying to pull on a pair of jeans and wasn't very good at multitasking, fell down in shock. Plus, being tangled hadn't helped him much either. "_What?!"_

"That blond bimbo."

"Kristy?"

"I think you mean Satan." Kurt muttered.

"Wait. What about her?" Blaine asked, flopping onto his back and tugging his jeans all the way up his legs and muttering about how he was gaining weight.

"Every single time that I visit you at you, she is leaning over with her push up breasts angled at your face."

"Really?" Blaine asked, standing and buttoning his pants.

"You can be so oblivious sometimes." Kurt said, but not unkindly, and make his way over to Blaine. "You know there was that whole thing when she was new and tried to kiss you."

"And I told her I was gay… and married… to the most gorgeous man on the face of the Earth." Blaine kissed Kurt and then smiled brightly. "Because I am."

"I know you told her that but… We've only been married for a year. It's good now but you know there will be problems down the road… And I might be gone for four months with work and…"

"Kurt…" Blaine stared at him, in shock.

"What if _that _causes problems? And she's here with her boobs and her dumb giggle which is SO annoying… not to mention her fake blond hair…"

"Well if you leaving causes problems, then we'll have problems… and I guess, yeah. She'd still be here with her boobs and stuff… but that doesn't mean I'm going to… sleep with her or anything. I wouldn't tell her if we were having problems in the first place… and I sure as hell wouldn't cheat on you."

Kurt looked him in the eyes, looking upset.

"Ever. With anyone. Girl, guy, monkey. Never, Kurt."

Kurt took a deep breath.

"I don't care how many problems we have or how big they are. I would never do anything to put _us _in jeopardy." Blaine continued.

"I'm being silly."

"Maybe a bit… but, Kurt, really. We have been through so many things together and look how far we've come. No one can come between us, no matter how sexy _they _think they are. Because no one is as sexy as you… and even if someone was sexier than me, you'd never be able to leave me because of my curls."

Kurt rolled his eyes as Blaine slid his arms around him. "You have a point with the curls."

"You make me happy. You're my soul mate."

"Yes but when you find a missing shoe and put it back with the other one, you declare they're soul mates. I don't know how serious you think soul mates are." Kurt teased.

"No. The shoes are _sole _mates. Get it, Kurt? Get it?" Blaine giggled.

"I love that you find yourself so amusing." Kurt rolled his eyes again and nuzzled Blaine's shoulder.

"You think I'm funny."

"Funny looking." Kurt smiled into his shoulder and then looked up at Blaine, still not able to quite forgive Blaine for his growth spurt he'd had his first year at Harvard. "I feel bad for our daughters."

"I'm going to laugh so hard when we both end up spawning boys." Blaine snorted. "I'm going to laugh for _years_."

"That would be _horrible_." Kurt said, expression completely serious.

"You believe me when I say I'd never cheat, right? Ever?" Blaine pulled back and tilted his head.

"I believe you. It just irks me to see her doing that stuff at you. It's disgusting." Kurt raised his hand to touch Blaine's cheek.

"I wish you hadn't told me." Blaine sighed. "Now I'm going to know what she's doing. Gross. I really don't like boobs."

Kurt kissed him before heading towards the bathroom. "Don't worry. Tomorrow I'll take care of it."

"…What do you mean, Kurt?"

…

"Hey!" Blaine positively beamed when Kurt came into his office. "I didn't know we were having lunch today."

"I know. I wanted to surprise you." Kurt smiled, going behind Blaine's desk and kissing him quickly.

"I am definitely okay with that." Blaine put the papers he was reading on the desk and looked at Kurt. "I miss you."

"I miss you too." Kurt sat on Blaine's lap, arms going around his neck.

Blaine kissed Kurt, much slower. Kurt moaned into Blaine's lips and stood, dragging both of them into a standing position and leaning back against Blaine's desk.

"You're going to get me into trouble." Blaine mumbled into his lips.

"You're the second highest ranking person here and your boss loves me." Kurt said before pulling Blaine to him and crashing their lips together.

Blaine moaned this time, hands sliding to Kurt's hips and resting there.

Kurt tangled his fingers in Blaine's hair, gel be damned, and tugged a bit. Just enough to make Blaine moan again and definitely not hard enough to hurt him.

"Blaine, I brought you some coff—."

"Go, Kristy. Now." Blaine said, barely pulling away before crashing his lips to Kurt's again.

Kurt giggled into Blaine's lips when he heard the door shut, hands going to squeeze Blaine's ass.

Blaine pulled away from him, panting. "Nicely played, husband."

"I thought so too." Kurt grinned impishly. "Walk home together tonight? You can come to my office and wait for me to get done… Maybe we can finish where we're leaving off?"

Blaine kissed him and grabbed his arm as he tried to move away from behind the desk. "You have to fix my hair I can't go out like this."

"That's fine. The person I wanted to see did." Kurt moved closer, beginning to fix his hair.

Blaine watched him carefully, wondering how he'd been lucky enough to have someone as beautiful as Kurt Hummel love him, let alone _marry _him.

Kurt looked up and lowered his hands when Blaine's door opened. "Hey, Bob."

"Hello, Kurt. I hope you put that young woman in her place. I'm tired of seeing her boobs everywhere." Blaine's boss sighed, setting a manila folder on Blaine's desk. "Come to my office after your lunch. I have a new case for you to work on."

"Am I really the only one that didn't notice, though?" Blaine picked the folder up and flipped it open.

"Yes." Kurt and Bob said together.

"I'll see you later, Blaine." Kurt kissed Blaine's cheek and left the room.

"Have I mentioned I like him lately?" Bob asked.

Blaine grinned. "Sorry, he's taken. Kristy's free though."

"I don't know why on Earth I brought you to New York with me. Biggest mistake of my life." Bob sighed, leaving the room. "My office in an hour, Blaine."

"Okay. I'll bring our friend."

Blaine giggled when his office door slammed. "He loves me."


	4. Babies Warning: Bed Time

**_KLAINE BABIES YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!_**

* * *

"DADDYYYYY!"

"Blaine, no." Kurt whined, rolling onto his stomach. "Don't."

"But she wants us." Blaine protested, sitting up.

"_If we keep going to her, then she's going to keep doing this. All night. For the rest of our lives."_ Kurt said, rolling back over and sitting up.

"But it's not like with Nicky and Zachy, Kurt. She doesn't have someone in her bedroom with her. She's scared." Blaine said, moving to stand.

"No, Blaine." Kurt said, grabbing his arm. "We have to just let her fall asleep on her own and then she'll see it's okay."

"That's _cruel_." Blaine scoffed. "Let me go."

"Blaine, we have not had sex in four weeks." Kurt snapped. "Because every single night, Sophie starts to cry for us between ten and ten thirty. And you always bring her in here to sleep with us. Do you _like _being celibate?"

""DAAAAAAADDYYYYYYYYY!"

"Kurt, I'm getting her! I can't take listening to it!" Blaine exclaimed, jumping out of bed. "Daddy's coming, Sophie!"

"Oh my God, Blaine. You are such a pushover." Kurt moaned, falling back into a laying position and scooting onto his side of the bed.

"I don't care." Blaine left the room, padding down the hall and looking into the twins' bedroom. Nicky was on top of his blankets, legs akimbo and wavy hair sticking up. Zachy was neatly snuggled under his covers, his stuffed penguin under one arm and his other hand was half covering his face.

"D-D-DADDDDY!"

Blaine jogged across the hall. "Baby, baby, baby, what's the matter?" he cooed, coming into the room.

Sophie was standing in her crib, hair sticking to her face and her cheeks red and sticky from her tears. "Daddy!"

"Hello there, my love." Blaine said, scooping her up. "You're supposed to be asleep, monkey."

"Scared." Sophie said, latching onto him and burying her face in his neck. She snuffled into his skin, shoulders shaking.

"What are you scared of, pumpkin?" Blaine asked, rocking her an attempt to soothe her.

"The darks." Sophie responded, whimpering. "Monsters."

"There aren't any monsters, silly!" Blaine laughed.

"Nicky said they is under the crib and in the closet." Sophie protested, looking at him with big eyes.

"Well Nicky is very wrong." Blaine said, turning the light on. "Do you see any monsters?"

"They is hiding."

"They _are _hiding." Blaine corrected. "But there are no monsters. See? The light scares monsters away."

"Sleep with Daddy." Sophie said, nuzzling his shoulder.

"You're gonna get Daddy in trouble." Blaine laughed, but in all honesty he had already resigned to the fact that his daughter would be cocooned between he and Kurt again. He actually kind of liked it.

"Sleep with Daddy." Sophie repeated, blinking at him with big hazel eyes. "Please?"

"Since you asked so nicely." Blaine shut the light off and padded back down the hall, peeking into the twins room again. Nicky had somehow managed to end up on the floor, and had pulled his pillow over his face. "Oh God. Sophie, Nicky is trying to kill himself I think."

"Uh oh." Sophie yawned and nuzzled Blaine as he pulled the pillow off of Nicky. His son just rolled over and sniffled.

"I'm gonna set you here and put him back in bed." Blaine sat Sophie against Nicky's pillow on the bed and then eased Nicky up.

"Mmmmh no, the aliens won't like that." Nicky mumbled into Blaine's shoulder. "They only like blue cheese."

"Shh, shh, shh." Blaine whispered, easing him onto the bed.

Nicky curled up, rolling and smacking Sophie in the face.

Sophie scowled and attempted to kick him as Blaine scooped her up.

"Where'stheparty?" Zachy murmured sleepily, sitting up and rubbing his eyes. "Dad?"

"Go back to sleep, honey. Nicky just fell out of bed again."

"Mmmhm." Zachy rolled over, back facing them.

Blaine tiptoed out of the room and made his way into the bedroom. Kurt was sitting up and sketching.

"Hey, none of that in the bedroom. If I can't have case papers in bed, then you can't have _that_ in bed." Blaine said teasingly.

"You've brought me a gift." Kurt put his sketchbook on the floor and opened his arms.

"Daddy." Sophie said, nuzzling his chest.

Kurt wrapped his arms around her and kissed the top of her head. "Hello, baby. Are we not sleeping in our crib?"

"Monsters." Blaine whispered. "They're scary."

"There aren't any monsters in your room, monkey." Kurt said, kissing her cheek. "Oh, your cheeks are all red from crying. Sweetie…"

Sophie nuzzled him, knowing she now had Kurt right where she wanted him. "Sleep with Daddy."

"Just tonight." Blaine said firmly.

"Like last night? And the thirty before that?" Kurt rolled his eyes, sliding into a laying position. "Alright, sweetie. You're gonna lay right here between me and Daddy."

Sophie giggled and waved as Blaine laid on her other side.

"Hi!" Blaine said, leaning over and attacking her chubby face with kisses.

"Blaine, she's never going to go to sleep!" Kurt tried to sound annoyed, but it was hard to be annoyed when you had such an adorable husband and daughter like he had.

"Sleep is for the weak!" Nicky declared, making his way into the room.

"Hey, don't leave meeee!" Zachy yelped, running into the room. "Nicky, don't leave me! It's dark!"

"Daddy, Daddy, Daddy!" Nicky climbed onto the bed and crawled up in between Kurt and Blaine so he was next to Sophie. "I had a dream about—about monsters! And aliens! Zachy was there too."

"I left my penguin!" Zachy yelped, running from the room.

"Watch out for the monsters!" Nicky called.

"Nicholas, stop. Monsters aren't real." Blaine sighed as Sophie's eyes widened.

"What about the old lady across the street? She's scary." Nicky said, giving Kurt a lopsided smile.

"He's got a point." Blaine mumbled as Kurt smacked his arm. "Ouch!"

Zachy padded into the room and scrambled to get on the bed, but he was still short enough that Blaine had to help him.

"Was that hard work, baby?" Kurt asked, ruffling his son's curls.

"Yes." Zachy nodded and curled upon Blaine's lap. "Thanks, Dad."

"You're very welcome, sir." Blaine said, kissing his cheek.

"Now that we've got a bed full of children," Kurt laughed. "Maybe we should attempt to sleep."

"Sleep is for the weak!" Nicky repeated. "Plus, if we sleep the aliens will come and take our brains and swap them out with piggy brains."

"Will not." Zachy said, nuzzling Blaine's arm. "Right, Dad?"

"Very right." Blaine said as Nicky began making loud snorting noises and giving Sophie Eskimo kisses. Sophie raised her little fist, hitting him upside the head. "_Sophia_, that wasn't very nice."

"It's okay, Dad. I can take it." Nicky said cheerfully, snuggling up to Kurt. "You're warm, Daddy."

"And you're cold, little one." Kurt said, wrapping his arms around Nicky and pulling him closer. "I'll get you warm."

Nicky giggled as Kurt rubbed his little hands. "I'm warm now."

"I don't know. You still feel a little chilly to me!" Kurt exclaimed.

"_Daddy_!" Nicky whined.

"Shh. The less you speak, the warmer you'll be." Kurt laughed.

"You just don't want me to talk." Nicky pouted.

"No!" Blaine gasped, smirking. "We would never want you to be quiet."

"It's a good thing." Nicky said, climbing over Kurt and sitting above his head on the pillows. He then stood on the pillows, attempting to lift himself with the headboard.

"Nick!" Kurt snapped. "No. How many times do we have to tell you to not climb on the furniture?"

"But it's fun, daddy." Nicky said, making no move to cease his lifting.

"He gets this from you." Kurt said, sending Blaine a playful glare. "There is no doubt whatsoever that these are your sons, Blaine."

Nicky slid down and moved on Blaine's lap with Zachy. "Dad, how come you and Sophie and Daddy all sleep together?"

"We like parties too." Zachy said, nodding.

Blaine looked at his sons, both staring at him with his own wide hazel eyes.

"Sophie's afraid to sleep on her own." Kurt said, rocking Sophie.

"Someone's monster stories aren't helping." Blaine added, tickling Nick's side.

"Sophie needs a big girl bed!" Zachy exclaimed.

Sophie, who had half fallen asleep, sat up eagerly. "Big girl?"

"A big girl bed!" Zachy nodded. "And then—and then, 'cause you'll be a big girl, you won't be scared!"

"Big girl bed, Daddy." Sophie said, tugging at Kurt's t-shirt. "I is a big girl."

"I _am _a big girl." Blaine said.

"We are not getting her a big girl bed." Kurt snapped. "She is my _baby_."

"Shucks, they're gonna do it again." Zachy sighed.

"Daddy, Grandpa said you had to accept it." Nicky said.

"She'll be three soon, Kurt." Blaine pointed out.

"But she's the _baby_." Kurt repeated, kissing Sophie's cheek. "You can all three just stop it right now, please."

"It's okay. She'll still be a baby." Blaine laughed.

"Big girl." Sophie argued. "Big girl!"

"And when you're big, monsters don't bother you!" Zachy said, kissing her cheek.

"Oh, how sweet." Blaine cooed. "Our babies are sweet."

"We're not babies!" The twins chorused together.

"Big girl, big girl, Daddy!" Sophie said, tugging at Kurt's shirt again. "Big girl like Nicky and Zachy, Daddy!"

"Why did we teach them how to talk again?" Kurt sighed sadly.

"I don't know. We didn't even have to try with Sophie. She pretty much came out of the womb talking." Blaine laughed.

"And teaching Zachy was like pulling teeth." Kurt sighed again.

"No. He knew how, he just refused." Blaine said, giving Zachy a squeeze. "You were just asserting your independence, right?"

"Mhmm." Zachy said sleepily, nodding into Blaine's chest.

"Shh, shh." Kurt whispered as Nicky opened his mouth to begin talking.

"No, Zachy, no! Fight it!" Nicky said, clambering over Sophie and shaking Zachy. "Don't let them win!"

"Nicholaaaas." Blaine whined, moving into a laying position and snuggling Zachy who was trying his best to ignore his twin. "Lay down."

Nicky laid down over Sophie, trapping her.

"DADDY DADDY DADDY DADDY!" Sophie shrieked, arms and legs flailing wildly.

Kurt pulled Nicky off of Sophie. Sophie sat up, scowling and very much awake.

"I'll just be going to sleep now." Nicky giggled, hiding under the covers. He wiggled until his head had reached the foot of the bed, pushing the blanket up until his head was visible. "Just needed breathing room. It's okay."

"This is your fault." Kurt hissed as he tried to fold the middle of the blanket in a way that left _all _parties without covered faces.

"My fault? You're the one who wanted the long blanket." Blaine responded, causing Zachy to giggle gleefully.

"It's true, Daddy!"


	5. Blaine's Valentine's Day Card

"Kurt, who are you going to make your Valentine for?" Miss Bonnie asked, kneeling down by Kurt's chair. He was intently putting stick glue on the purple construction paper and dropping neon green glitter over it in a very elegant pattern. She smiled at his concentration because he even had his little tongue poking out the side of his mouth.

"Blaine." Kurt said moments later, only briefly looking up before grabbing the gold glitter and sprinkling it on his heart-shaped card as well.

Miss Bonnie glanced at Blaine, who was sitting between Wes and David, giggling as Wes covered his hand in glue and slapped it on the construction paper. She had to fight the urge to giggle herself as the other teacher rushed over, dragging Wes off to the sink to wash his hands "for the fifth time in ten minutes."

"Why Blaine and not Rachel? Or Quinn?" Miss Bonnie asked gently.

"Because Blaine has a nice smile and pretty eyes." Kurt responded.

"He does have a nice smile and pretty eyes, doesn't he?" Miss Bonnie smiled.

"Uh huh and my mommy says I can make cards for boys if I want and it's okay." Kurt continued. "So I'm making it for Blaine."

"Do you want me to go over your heart's edges and make it a little neater?"

"No. It's okay. Daddy says hearts don't really look like this anyway."

Miss Bonnie laughed and moved on to help her next student, making sure to keep an eye on both Kurt and Blaine. So maybe she shouldn't have secretly hoped the two ended up together with babies twenty years from then. But every time the two had to interact together, it was the most adorable thing she'd ever saw. Between Blaine's blushing and giggling and Kurt's giddy smiles, she couldn't _help _it. They were too precious.

She edged closer when Kurt finally stood to take his card to Blaine.

"It's _Kuuuuuurt_!" Wes sang obnoxiously as Kurt approached. "Hi, Kurt!"

Kurt gave a look that could only be disapproval, prompting giggles from all three of the other boys. He then turned, looking at Blaine who had returned to his watercolors.

"I made this for you!" he chirped.

A tiny very curly-headed Blaine Anderson looked back up from his watercolors, hazel eyes bright.

"You can be my Valentine now, please!" Kurt squeaked, holding out his very glittery bright purple and neon green card that was in the shape of a (very lopsided) heart.

"Boys can't be boys' Valentines." David said. "That's silly."

"My mommy says they can and I want Blaine to be mine." Kurt explained, trying to make eye contact with Blaine but he was too busy staring at the Valentine's Day card in awe. Maybe he liked it! "Miss Bonnie helped me." Kurt leaned forward and pointed to Blaine's name. "That's your name."

"It's pretty." Blaine blushed, finally looking up from his card. "You can be my Valentine too."

"Now they're _both _silly!" Wes whispered loudly, looking incredibly confused.

David looked at Kurt and Blaine and then looked back to Wes, shrugging. "Maybe it's in the water?"

"What does that mean?" Wes tilted his head.

"Dunno but my sissy says it a lot." David shrugged again, watching Kurt and Blaine curiously.

Kurt bounced up and down before clapping. As soon as both feet were flat on the ground, Blaine had thrown his arms around Kurt in a tight hug.

Yes.

Miss Bonnie really hoped they got married one day.


	6. Shirtless

"Hey, Blaine, I know we weren't going to leave for the theater until 7 but David said your soccer practice got out early and I figured that we could get food first if you wa—_ant_." Kurt's jaw dropped and his hand grasped the doorknob tightly.

"Huh?" Blaine, who had his back to the door, turned around and looked at Kurt. "Hey!"

"Oh, uh, hey." Kurt said, unable to tear his eyes away Blaine's chest. Shirtless chest. He told himself to look away, that he was being creepy, but he couldn't bring himself to look away from it. How was Blaine's chest and torso so sculpted? And since when had Kurt found body hair attractive as opposed to repulsive? Not that there was much of it on Blaine, but _damn_.

"What were you saying?" Blaine asked, seemingly oblivious to Kurt ogling his chest.

"Theater and food and—huh?" Kurt blinked several times. What had he come in for? What had Blaine _done _to him?

"Are you okay?" Blaine asked, now looking concerned. He took a step closer to Kurt.

"No! Uh—you should—stay there. There is good. There is _great_." Kurt said quickly. Blaine couldn't come closer. Then Kurt's creepiness would reach an all new level. He'd have to resist the urge to touch Blaine's perfectly sculpted body. When had he suddenly reached a point of wanting to touch someone's _chest_? Was that normal?

"Oh…kay." Blaine said slowly, eyebrow arched. "Are you sure you're alright?"

"Just fine." Kurt said, feeling himself blush. Oh, he was _definitely _fine. Blaine was a picture right out of one of those borderline X rated calendars and… "I was just… saying that we… what?"

"Are you…" Blaine glanced down and then figured it out. "_Ooooh_. Should I put a shirt on? Are you uncomfortable?"

"I mean, if you want to…" Kurt said, trying not to look disappointed.

Blaine blushed a bit himself, which was ridiculous. He'd had sex with twenty guys, but his first boyfriend saw him shirtless and he was embarrassed?

"Wow." Kurt said, staring. "Do you work out? You must."

"I run a lot and do warming up exercises…" Blaine said.

Kurt blushed even more, forcing himself to look up and into Blaine's pretty hazel eyes. Blaine wasn't a piece of meat. He probably didn't want to be stared at all day. Then again, his eyes were gorgeous too and that was okay, right? Right? "We…. Uh… sorry."

"It's okay. You don't have to apologize. I'm the one who left the door half-open." Blaine laughed a bit, not seeming annoyed.

_And I am so glad you did,_ Kurt thought to himself. It was like Christmas had come early. "I just… Would you like to get dinner before the movie?"

"I would love that." Blaine smiled happily. "Are you going to be to upset if I actually… you know… put a shirt on?"

"It's probably necessary, isn't it?" Kurt sighed, glancing down at his chest again and taking a mental picture of how perfect his boyfriend's body was because who knew when Kurt would see him shirtless again?

"Yeah, probably." Blaine laughed. "Just give me three minutes and I'll be ready to leave. Who is driving this time?"

"You can." Kurt said. _In fact, you should. If not, I'll drive off of the road because I'll be too preoccupied on your chest and oh wow, look at how low-cut those jeans are. Is this real life?_


	7. Babies Warning: Loosing Teeth

**_KLAINE BABIES YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!_**

* * *

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

Blaine stumbled into his daughter's room in the middle of the day, eyes wide. "What's wrong? What happened? Are you okay? Are you alive?"

Sophie, who was seated on her tiny bed, let out another shriek before bursting into loud tears. "IT HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURTS!"

"What hurts, monkey? Did you fall?" Blaine rushed over, examining her arms and legs without seeing any cuts of bruises. "What happened, baby?"

Sophie opened her mouth and pointed. One of her teeth was loose—loose and very nearly _out_. "IT HURTS, DADDY!"

"Oh, oh, oh no." Blaine cringed, standing her up and wiping her eyes. "My poor soapy baby."

"I'm dying!" She said dramatically, covering her face with both tiny hands.

"Baby, you are not dying. You're just losing a tooth." Blaine said, having to bite his lip to keep from giggling. There was no doubt Sophie was Kurt's child.

"But _why_?" Sophie scowled.

"Because it's time for you to get some big girl teeth!" Blaine said excitedly. Maybe if he seemed excited, she would quit freaking out on him. Sophie meltdowns were never good—for all parties involved.

"I'm a baby." Sophie argued.

"Of course you are. You'll be a baby until all of your teeth fall out."

Sophie's eyes widened in horror.

"But you get new ones!" Blaine said quickly, holding out his hand. "C'mon, lovebug."

"Hurts." Sophie whined, taking his hand.

"Do you want to wiggle it with your tongue?" Blaine asked.

"No. It _hurts_." Sophie yelped.

"But it looks _really _silly." Blaine said, leading her into the master bedroom and then into his and Kurt's bathroom. "Shh, don't tell Daddy or I'll get in trouble."

Sophie stared around the huge bathroom in awe, her hazel eyes wide. "It's big, daddy."

"I know." Blaine said, sitting her on the counter and then hopping onto the bathroom counter as well, putting her in his lap and facing the mirror.

"What are you doing?" Sophie questioned, eyebrow arching.

"You'll see, _Kurt_." Blaine teased. "Do what I do, okay?"

"Okay." Sophie nodded, staring into the mirror intently.

Blaine opened his mouth wide.

Sophie did so, looking very confused.

Blaine moved his tongue over one tooth, the exact tooth that was loose in little Sophie's mouth.

Sophie did so too, whining.

"Look at it! It moved!" Blaine said, pointing at the mirror.

Sophie did it again and giggled a bit. "It looks weird, daddy!"

"I know!" Blaine nodded eagerly.

"But it still hurts." Sophie said, leaning so close towards the mirror that her nose was pressed against it.

"You still wiggling, lovebug?" Blaine asked, playing with her hair.

"Uh huh. It feels really—OWWWWWWWWWW!"

Blaine reached out, catching the bloody tooth in his hand as it fell from her mouth. He sat it down on the sink and hugged Sophie as she began to cry.

"It's okay, baby. It's okay." Blaine laughed, very carefully hopping off of the counter and bouncing her. "It didn't hurt that bad, monkey."

"It d-d-_diiiiiid_!"

"Oh oh oh. That tooth was oh so mean." Blaine cooed. "That mean old tooth!"

"Darn that tooth!" Sophie cried, dramatically flinging her arms around his neck.

"Show me your mouth, monkey."

Sophie opened her mouth for Blaine, looking absolutely miserable.

"SOPHIE LOST A TOOTH!" Zachy exclaimed as he walked past Blaine and Sophie. "YAY!"

"Not yay! It hurts!" Sophie pouted, crossing her arms over her chest.

"But the tooth fairy will bring you money and then you can buy a toy." Zachy said reasonably. Blaine had never been more thankful for his son in his life. There was just something about Zachy that made him be able to calm Sophie down.

Sophie tilted her head, clearly thinking it over and trying to decide if that was worth stopping the dramatics.

"I bet the tooth fairy will bring enough for you to buy that new doggy at the stuffed animal store." Blaine said, kissing her rosy and tear-stained cheek.

"I think the tooth fairy will be stopping by my room tonight too. Right, dad?" Zachy asked, blinking innocently at Blaine.

"You run a hard bargain, sir." Blaine sighed as Sophie distractedly began to poke her tongue through the new gap in her mouth. He pulled two dollars out of his pocket and gave them to Zachy. "Go tell Nick that if he calls her a you-know-what mouth, he's in very big trouble."

"It'll cost you. I want that frog." Zachy said, grinning sweetly.

"You kids spend entirely too much time with Kurt." Blaine said as he pulled out three more dollars. "And no, you can't have an extra dollar as reassurance. Go."

"It's a pleasure." Zachy giggled before running off and yelling, "DON'T CALL SOPHIE A WINDOW MOUTH OR YOU GET IN TROUBLE!"

"Why would he call me a window mouth, daddy?" Sophie asked, looking confused.

"Don't worry about it, lovebug." Blaine said, kissing her chubby little cheek. "Let's go grab my phone so we can send Daddy a picture of you without your first tooth!"

"Yay!" Sophie clapped her hands together excitedly, bouncing up and down a bit in his arms.

"Yay is right!" Blaine laughed. "But after this one lost tooth you have to stop growing up on me, okay? Not one more inch or you'll break daddy's heart."

"Okay, Daddy." Sophie giggled and kissed his cheek. "I'll try."

"I wonder if coffee would help. It would at least make you _look _younger because you'd be shorter…" Blaine said to himself thoughtfully. Then he shook his head. "Nah. Then I'd have to be your supplier and Kurt and I go through enough coffee as it is."

Sophie just patted his head with one hand while the other gripped the collar of his shirt.

Now she just had to make sure the tooth fairy didn't try to kidnap her pet guinea pig like she was positive Santa had try to do. But _that _was another story entirely.


	8. Burt Embarasses Kurt

Okay, so maybe there was one _slight _drawback to dating Kurt Hummel. And really, it wasn't so much a drawback as a… habit that led to very many uncomfortable sittings with Kurt's father. That drawback was the fact that Kurt took _forever _to get ready. It didn't care if Blaine left thirty minutes later than he said he would (He'd done that in an attempt to not wait quite as long—hadn't worked, by the way) or if he told Kurt three hours in advance when he would be leaving.

And, really, they had been dating for four months. Kurt didn't need to be nervous about what he wore. To be quite honest, Kurt would have looked breathtaking in a garbage bag as far as Blaine was concerned. Besides, Blaine had a feeling it was beyond _just _impressing him.

"So, how's your summer going?" Kurt's father asked in a gruff voice, coming into the living room and sitting in his usual chair.

"Very well, sir." Blaine said, trying not to sound nervous. Burt had never been mean to him, but it could be awkward. He knew it had nothing to do with the fact that he was… well, a guy. They just didn't know each other that well yet.

"Are you excited about college?" Burt asked, eyeing him.

"A bit nervous." Blaine admitted. What was it with everyone asking him if he was 'excited' or 'ready'? No. He was moving to another state and had no idea what he was getting into. No. He wasn't _excited_. Maybe he would be once he got there, but no. Not yet.

"You'll be fine."

Blaine forced a smile and looked down at his hands. His nails were getting too long. He really needed to cut them… How much did he want to bet Kurt would notice and making a teasing comment? $5. $10? What did it matter, he was betting _himself_.

"Are your parents taking it well?" Burt asked, evidently still looking at him.

"Oh, yeah." Blaine said, trying to keep the sarcasm out of his voice. "They're happy…"

Burt gave him an odd look.

"For me. Happy for me." Blaine added quickly. Yeah, right. Happy in the sense that he would be an entire state away. That many more months they could be sure the wrong person wouldn't connect Blaine _Anderson,_homosexuality, and Senate candidates' grandson in the same sentence.

"Kurt said your dad wasn't too pleased you gave up soccer… he'll get over it, I'm sure." Burt tried to reassure him.

"Thanks." Blaine forced another smile.

"Okay, kid. You've got two options." Burt said very seriously.

Blaine sat up much straighter, meeting his eyes.

"Stories or pictures?"

"Excuse me?" Blaine asked anxiously.

"We both know Kurt's going to take ages." Burt shrugged. "We might as well have something to laugh over until he decides to grace us with his presence. For today would you rather see pictures or hear stories?"

"Of Kurt?" Blaine tilted his head.

"Yes."

"Pictures." Blaine said instantly. He'd always _wanted _to see pictures of little Kurt. How was he going to pass that up?

"I'll be right back." Burt said a little too eagerly, disappearing.

_You better hurry up. Your dad is bringing out the pictures,_ Blaine texted Kurt.

"Absolutely not!" Kurt called down the stairs as he all but ran down them. "Don't you _dare_, Dad!"

"I already got the album, kid. Go finish changing your outfit twenty times." Burt said, sitting on the couch next to Blaine instead of on the couch.

"Dad…" Kurt threatened.

"Nobody said you had to stay." Burt grinned and handed the large album to Blaine. "Here you go, buddy."

"Blaine, don't." Kurt pleaded, looking at Blaine with wounded puppy eyes. "Please."

Blaine hesitated.

"Fine. I will." Burt grunted, taking it back. He opened the album and set it on Blaine's lap. "Oh, look, he's naked."

"DAD!" Kurt yelped.

"Relax. I'm just kidding." Burt said as Blaine giggled a bit.

"Come on, Blaine. Let's go." Kurt said quickly.

"I don't know. You have to change your clothes a few more times." Blaine teased.

"He made his mom buy this princess doll for him." Burt said, pointing to a picture with a toddler Kurt holding a ragged plush doll. "He carried it everywhere for months. _Everywhere_."

"Oh God." Kurt moaned, covering his face. "Alright, Dad. I get that it's rude to make him wait so long. Come on, Blaine."

"_Were you a Powerpuff girl for Halloween_?" Blaine asked loudly, gleefully clapping his hands together.

"He insisted. He wouldn't even budge for the pink power ranger, which I thought was a _bit _more appropriate. Then again, now he occasionally wears those skirts—as you saw at prom." Burt chuckled.

"_Dad…_" Kurt hissed.

"You chose Blossom over Kimberly?!" Blaine asked, horrified. "Kurt, this changes everything. I see you in a completely different light."

"Please let this nightmare end." Kurt said, sinking down on Blaine's other side. "Oh my God, I'm in the bathtub! Don't look!" Kurt threw his hand over a picture as Blaine turned the page.

"His mom liked to take pictures of him in the bath or and of his butt." Burt snickered. "I knew one day I'd get the joy of showing this to someone else who would appreciate it."

Blaine didn't respond. He was too busy giggling immaturely into his fist.

"See? There's one!" Burt grinned turning the page again and pointing at Kurt's naked butt. "He liked to run around naked too."

"You're—so—cute—tehehe!" Blaine gasped out through his laughs, before throwing his head back and beginning to laugh even more.

"I hope you're keeping this one, Kurt." Burt grinned and pointed at Blaine. "I like him."

"The one I'm considering giving away is _you_." Kurt said standing and grabbing Blaine's hand. "Come on. We're going to be late."

"But—the pictures—." Blaine said, looking crestfallen. "I want to see more. That was only five pages!"

"Next time." Burt mouthed as Kurt dragged him from the house. He then added, where Kurt could hear, "You boys be safe!


	9. Blaine Serenades Thad

"But what happened? You were sober fifteen minutes ago!"

"Pfft! That was _bor-_ing." Blaine said, plopping onto the couch next to David. "I'm Cool Blaine. That was Boring Blaine. This is _cool_."

"Have I mentioned how much I love you, dude? Have I?" Wes slurred. "Because, Blaine, you are _awesome_. Like I'd totally marry you if you were a girl. I might even kiss you anyway."

Blaine began giggling. "Really? You wanna kiss a dudeeee?"

"What's it like?" Wes asked eagerly, nodding.

"'S awesome. Like _so _much better than kissing… than kissing… _did you know that_… oh, I really like Vodka. The room is spinning." Blaine leaned against David and kicked his legs out. "Thank you for being so awesome, David!"

"Oh my God. Wes, Blaine, why do you two do this to me?" David sighed. "I feel like a parent."

"Katy Perry! Someone said Katy Perry!" Blaine jumped up. "_I kissed a girl and I liked ittttt_—. Play that one guys! Please!"

"My dad is going to kill me." Nick said coming into the room. "Jeff, get off of the table!"

"But Blaine climbs on the tables!" Jeff protested, jumping off.

"At _Dalton_, not at my house!"

"THAD!" Blaine cheered. "You—you got me my solo and that's really, really… Hey, I like the buttons on that and—oh, hey, David. I'm just talking to Thad. He voted for me, you know. You and Wes have to vote 'cause you're the bestest buds ever but Thad—he sees my true talents, David."

"He sees something alright." A random Warbler muttered walking past.

"I see that, Anderson, but we don't need another summer fiasco, right?" David asked in a firm voice, pulling Blaine away from Thad rather forcefully because he was nearly unbuttoning Thad's shirt in an effort to 'see the buttons.'

"Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Totally right and I've gotta kiss Wes anyway. Sorry." Blaine gave Thad a one shouldered shrug and ran to the couch. "Wesley, ready to kiss a duuuuude?"

"I'M GONNA KISS A DUDE!" Wes shouted. "Everybody! Hey, let me have that gavel, Charlie. You graduate soon anyway. _I said give it_! I need it before I kiss the dude!"

"Say please!" Blaine whispered loudly, climbing onto the coffee table. "Manners are very important! I learned that in etiquette class!"

"See! How come _Blaine _gets to climb on the coffee table?" Jeff pouted.

"Blaine, get off of the coffee table!" Nick exclaimed.

"Hey, yeah, you. I climb on furniture. It's like my _thing_. The ladies love it. The dudes don't because I would join the one club with no other gay members but—" Blaine slurred, holding his hand up. "Wes! Wes, it's just a dumb gavel and you're giving me the solos anyway. C'mon, Wes."

"Come down." David said, coaxing Blaine off of the coffee table and seating him on the couch.

"Okay, okay, but I've gotta kiss Wes." Blaine said, stumbling a bit. "Okay?"

"Okay. You can kiss Wes if you just… just calm down for a minute." David promised him.

"I told you alcohol was a bad idea." Trent hissed.

"I don't know. Anderson is pretty funny when he's drunk." Jeff responded. "I think it's worth it."

"Thank you!" Blaine said dramatically. "I'm so funny. I'm hilarious. Am I right?"

"Blaine. Blaine, look at me." David said, shaking Blaine's shoulder until he had Blaine's attention. "I am going to go to the bathroom. Do _not _leave this couch. Alright?"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm not four." Blaine said, waving David off. His face broke out into a grin when Thad sat down on the couch. "Hello there, cowboy."

"Cowboy?" Trent asked, walking away. "You know what? I don't even want to know."

"Are you sure we should leave them alone? They might try to make babies." Jeff asked.

"Nah, they'll be fine. Blaine can kick if he needs to." Trent reassured him as they left.

"So why did you give me the solo?" Blaine asked, pushing a stray curl out of his face and scooting up to Thad who was staring at him.

"Because you sound _amazing_." Thad said, staring at him with wide eyes.

"I get that a lot." Blaine giggled, clapping his hands together. "People love my voice and my hair. I don't like my hair. It's poofy. Do you like my hair, Thad?"

"Your hair is great." Thad said, eyeing his dark and ungelled curls.

"Aw, you're just saying that." Blaine giggled. "Did you have the Coke? _Pssst, it's not just Coke_."

"I didn't have any alcohol and you might have had a little too much." Thad responded, eyes trailing down Blaine's body. "Which is an okay combination for me."

"Hey, sir! My face is up here!" Blaine said, shaking Thad's shoulder. "I may be gig…giggly, but I'm not a girl. Do you understand me? And I'm not gonna pretend to be on either 'cause I'm not—not into that. I mean it's a-awesome an all, but it's not… it's not me… But it's great too, you know? Hey, why are you staring at me? You always stare at me. Do I have a weird face? Is it because I'm mixed?"

"Huh?" Thad asked, looking confused.

"I'm half Filipino and a whole lot of _awesome_." Blaine declared.

"No, it isn't that. It's just… you…"

Blaine's mouth fell open. "Are you—_naaaah_, Thad isn't gay. You're Thad. Is Thad gay?"

"Well, you see—."

"Were you checking me out?" Blaine gasped, hazel eyes widening. "Holy cow. Was—Was David right? Hey, you know, staring isn't polite. Why are you staring at me?! I think you have a problem."

"Sometimes it's hard to look away." Thad admitted.

"Oh." Blaine shrugged. "That's cool, I guess. But I'm only kissing Wes tonight. You got that, Mr. Thaddy?"

"Uhm… sure…"

"_Did you hear that_?" Blaine squealed.

"Hear what?"

"Rod Stewart! This song is _awesome_." Blaine said, scooting closer to Thad and crawling onto his lap. "_He's acting shy looking for an answer—come on, honey, let's spend the night together_—just don't tell David—_Now hold on a minute before we go any farther_—."

"BLAINE!" David yelped, rushing over and roughly pulling Blaine off of Thad while sending Thad a glare. "What did I tell you?"

"I was on the couch." Blaine shrugged free of David's grip. "I'm gonna go and kiss Wes now, 'kay? Mmkay."

"Thad, just stop staring at him like that!" David exclaimed as Blaine obliviously walked off. "It's creepy and if you keep it up, Wes might hurt you."

"I think he's into me." Thad said, looking mesmerized.

"No. He's into anybody with body heat. He's a cuddle whore." David snapped.

"He likes to cuddle?" Thad asked hopefully.

"_Not you_!"

* * *

**If you have anything you'd like me to write, just send me a prompt! It's easiest for me if you do it via my Tumblr Ask box (if you don't have Tumblr, you can do it anonymously. But you can also leave them here in a review or drop me a message too! :)**


	10. The First Time

This was different.

This was going to be different.

To be completely honest, Kurt was surprised that his dad had believed the Rachel and Mercedes sleep over thing. Then again, Kurt was eighteen. Maybe his dad knew he was lying but just chose to go along with it for both of their sanity.

And he also couldn't believe that he was going to spend the night at Blaine's house.

_Spend the night at Blaine's house._

It was the end of September and they had now been dating a little over six months. Had they explicitly said they would be having sex at this little sleepover? No. But it felt different. There had been several sleepovers at Dalton but those had been different. At those, Wes and David were always there, making kissy and sucking noises as Kurt and Blaine cuddled on Blaine's bed.

But, no. This sleepover was not going to be like those. There was no Wes and David to be there. To keep things from happening that wouldn't have happened before, but were much more likely to happen now.

After all, their last two visits hands had been granted access below the equator… and that had been _amazing_. He had never thought it could feel that good but Blaine was apparently some hand job God or something. After the initial shock and partial anxiety attack (_Blaine Anderson was touching him, for God's sake!_) had worn off, it had literally been one of the most amazing feelings ever.

And hearing the noises that Blaine had made when Kurt had touched _him_. That had just been something else entirely and it was almost scary how much power he'd had over Blaine in those few minutes. How amber Blaine's eyes had been, how he tilted his head back and had made _those _noises for _him_.

Kurt was ready, though. He wanted to have sex with Blaine. It wasn't about the fact that Blaine had lost his virginity three years ago when he was fifteen while Kurt was still stuck on Virgin Island. It wasn't even about how Kurt wanted to feel more of _that _kind of pleasure—not that he didn't want to feel it, of course! It ran deeper than that, though.

He and Blaine had grown closer and closer. Kurt had been afraid when Blaine moved in August that they would instantly grow apart and that Blaine would end things. Instead, it had brought them closer together. The time they did get to spend together was cut _drastically_, but it made the times together all that much more special. Not to mention the fact that it was impossibly hard to date Blaine Anderson and not think about things like that when he had those messy curls(maybe Kurt liked them more than he'd admit, even if they weren't easily tamed without the help of half of a gel bottle) and those hazel eyes and that sweet smile. He just wanted to _love _Blaine.

He did love Blaine, but he wanted… _more_. He wanted to go to that next level with Blaine. He knew for a fact that Blaine would never hurt him. Blaine was a perfect gentleman who probably would have waited for five years if Kurt had asked him too. Blaine would never force or pressure him to do anything. In fact, the words that Kurt were hearing more and more often lately were, "I want to make sure that you're comfortable… so I can be comfortable."

He was ready, though. In fact, he had probably decided that two weeks ago when he and Blaine had last… Could you call it fooling around when no actual sex had been involved? Not to mention the amount of masturbating he had done since the hand jobs started was getting a little out of hand and he couldn't help but think it was because he wanted more.

When had Kurt gone from not wanting to talk about sex to masturbating multiple times a day, lying to his father to have a sleepover at his older boyfriend's house, and planning to lose his virginity? To be honest, Kurt couldn't remember.

It didn't matter, though. He just knew he was ready.

…

Kurt woke up comfortable and warm, Blaine's arms wrapped tightly around him. He stretched, wincing just a bit, and shuffled closer. They had really done it. Kurt and Blaine had had sex. They had had sex and fallen asleep, legs tangled together and _happy._

And now he was waking up next to Blaine. It was the most amazing feeling ever. Maybe he was a little sore but it really wasn't as bad as he thought it would be—they had gone really slow and Blaine had been very gentle, of course. The soreness was alright though, because the before, during, and the after of the night before had just been… amazing.

"Mmmh." Blaine moaned, nuzzling Kurt.

"Are you awake?" Kurt whispered, carefully sitting up and looking down at his boyfriend. Sometimes it was still hard to believe that they were together. That Blaine wanted and loved him and not Jeremiah Gap Guy or Thad—because Blaine was the only person in the world to _not _realize that Thad was gay.

"Now I am." Blaine said, slowly opening his eyes and giving Kurt a small, sleepy smile. "How do you feel?"

"Great." Kurt said, smiling back somewhat nervously. Was he allowed to say that? He did feel great. But what if Blaine was having second thoughts? Or what if Blaine thought he was horrible in bed? "How do you feel?"

"Wonderful." Blaine pushed himself into a sitting position and bit his lip, trying very hard not to keep from grinning.

Kurt's smile grew and he shuffled closer, moving so that he was sitting next to Blaine with his head rested on Blaine's shoulder. Blaine sure didn't _seem _like he'd had a bad time. And if the noises he'd been making the night before were symbolic of anything, it was definitely not boredom.

"Are you sore?" Blaine asked quietly, looking down at him.

"A bit. It's not bad." Kurt blushed.

"Good. I was trying to be gentle. I didn't want to hurt you." Blaine bit his lip. "Sorry you're sore at all."

"I think it's to be expected, isn't it?" Kurt asked, smile still plastered on his face. How was it possible to be this happy?

"Are you… do you…" Blaine said slowly. "I mean… You don't wish we'd waited?"

"Not at all." Kurt said instantly and firmly.

Blaine let out a relieved sigh and moved them into a laying position, arms going around Kurt. "I was afraid you might…" he admitted.

"I could never regret anything that involves you." Kurt whispered, leaning his forehead against Blaine's and reaching his hand down to take one of Blaine's hands.

Blaine smiled, raising their hands and kissing Kurt's knuckles. "Good. I could never regret anything involving you either, Kurt."


	11. Babies Warning: Father's Day

"Shhhh!" Kurt whispered, holding a finger to his lip. "Shhh!"

"DADADADADA!" Little Sophie babbled. "DADADADADA!"

"Shh, angel, shh." Kurt said, popping a pacifier into her mouth.

Sophie scowled at him.

"Mute button. Phew. That was close!" Nicky said loudly. "Good job, Daddy!"

"Thank you, Nicholas." Kurt said, scooping Zachy up. "Zachary is going to help Daddy with the pancakes and Nicholas is going to help Daddy with the eggs."

"But I wanted to help with the bacon!" Nicky protested.

"Baby, the bacon will pop on you." Kurt said, bringing his pancake batter over while maneuvering Zachy. "Okay, Zachy. I'm going to fill—."

"GIMME!" Zachy reached for it. "I wanna do it!"

"When I tell you to pour—."

"I know!" Zachy grunted, stretching his arm as far as he could.

"Okay, okay." Kurt laughed. "Somebody is excited to make Dada breakfast."

"He's gonna love it!" Zachy said, grinning adorably. "Because he likes to eat a lot like me!"

"God, you and Blaine are one in the same." Kurt laughed as he repositioned his arm around Zachy. "Nicky, is Sophia still okay?"

"She fell asleep."

"Yes, that's what pacifiers are good for." Kurt said. "Alright, Nicky. Get the eggs out of the refrigerator _very carefully_. I put them on the bottom shelf."

Nicky eagerly padded to the refrigerator and opened it.

"Good job, Zachy!" Kurt said, grabbing the spatula. "You want to let me do this one and you can do the next one?"

"Uh huh." Zachy nodded, curls bobbing with his little head.

"Daddy, I'm ready with the eggs!" Nicky announced, sitting Indian style on the tile floor.

Kurt carefully flipped the first pancake.

"Daddy, can I try now?" Zachy asked eagerly.

"You sure can. Nice and…slow." Kurt finished.

"It's broken!" Zachy said, hazel eyes widening in horror as the pancake split in two.

"That's okay, that's okay!" Kurt said quickly.

"I'll try the other one!" Zachy said after Kurt turned the large skillet to the side.

"Wait just a—minute."

"NOOOO that one too!" Zachy hung his head. "I'm a _failure_!"

"If anyone ever denies you are Blaine's child, they clearly have not spent five minutes with either of you." Kurt said, flipping the fourth and last pancake. "You did good! Look! We didn't burn them."

"But they're _dead_." Zachy pouted.

"The good thing about Dada is that he'll eat anything." Kurt winked. "Even if it's broken in half."

"But it's not pretty." Zachy said, still frowning.

"Neither is that gross dip that he likes to go with his Tostitos but he eats that all up, doesn't he?" Kurt kissed Zachy's chubby cheek.

"That's true." Zachy said, perking up. "That stuff is very ugly."

Kurt smiled at him and sat him on the floor. "Now watch Sophie will Nicky and I make the scrambled eggs?"

"Okay." Zachy nodded.

Nicky hopped up, three eggs already gathered in his hands.

"Alright." Kurt neatly stacked the (half unassembled) pancakes on a plate and then carefully hoisted Nicky up.

"I help Dada with the eggs, Daddy. I know how to dos it."

"How to _do _it." Kurt corrected. "Go on, then. Show me how to open the egg."

"Well Dada always does that part." Nicky said.

"Ah. I see." Kurt said, taking the eggs from him one at a time and setting two on the counter with his free hand and then keeping one. "You boys are getting heavy."

"It's 'cause we're big now." Zachy chirped from where he was rocking Sophie's carrier.

"My big boys." Kurt nodded.

"And the Sophie baby."

"And the Sophie baby." Kurt laughed, cracking the first egg. "Okay, now show me what to do Nicky."

"Well Daddy always does the next part too." Nicky said.

Kurt rolled his eyes, smiling as he began to scramble the egg and milk mixture. "Alright. Are you going to tell me when to stop, then?"

"Well Daddy hums a song and when he stops humming, it's done!" Nicky explained.

"But I thought you helped Daddy make it all the time."

"I do. I help a lot. He just won't let me touch them. He says he can't trust me around the oven 'cause I'm a wild child."

Kurt bit down hard to keep from bursting into laughter.

"He says I'm something else." Nicky continued. "And he tells me I can't walk around without underwear on but sometimes I like to be free as a bird."

"But if you don't wear underwear, what about the little bit of pee that doesn't come out when we shake?" Zachy asked. "Won't it get on the floor? That's gross. Uncle Finn says that you can't always get all the pee out. Never ever."

"Even with a Q-tip."

Kurt set Nicky down on the floor and turned the stove off, taking a calming breath.

"That would hurt." Zachy whined.

"Daddy, why won't all the pee come? Sometimes I wait a long time and it still happens!"

"I don't think Daddy's breathing." Zachy said.

"Hey, it's not nice to laugh at us!" Nicky pouted. "What's so funny?"

"I-I-I'm sorry." Kurt gasped out. "G-G-Go get Dada w-while I do the bacon."

Nicky and Zachy both scrambled across the house, running into the master bedroom and tugging on the sheets.

"TIME TO GET UP!"

"HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!"

"GET UP, DAD!"

"YEAH DADA, GET UP!"

"WE MADE YOU BREAKFAST!"

"AND I HELPED WITH THE EGGS!"

"I HELPED WITH THE PANCAKES!"

Blaine pushed himself into a sitting position and waved to his sons as he yawned.

"DAD'S UP!" Zachy cheered, bouncing up and down. "C'mon, Dada! Breakfast for you! Only for you 'cause it's Father's Day!"

"And you're a daddy! So is Daddy, but he gets dinner!" Nicky said, grabbing Blaine's hand and tugging him from the room when he was standing.

"Everyone gets lunch, though! Even the Sophie baby!" Zachy said, grabbing his other hand. "Happy Father's Day!"

Blaine reached down and scooped both of them up, hugging them tightly, as soon as he made it into the kitchen and saw the plate on the table. "I love you guys soooooo much."

"Sorry I killed the pancakes." Zachy frowned.

"It's okay. I don't like to eat live things." Blaine grinned, making both boys giggle.

"DADADADA!" Sophie suddenly shrieked.

Blaine sat the boys down and picked up Sophie. "Hello, baby girl. Did you help make Daddy's breakfast too?"

"No. She pooped and slept." Nicky said. "'Cause that's all she does."

"And cry." Zachy added, climbing onto a seat at the table. "Hey! Daddy made more pancakes."

"As my gift to you, everyone gets to eat today." Kurt said.

"You look like you've been crying." Blaine said, looking confused.

"I'll fill you in later and you can help me make a phone call to Uncle Finn." Kurt promised, before kissing him. "Happy Father's Day."

"Happy Father's Day." Blaine grinned.

…

"You _cannot _leave this room." Zachy said very seriously.

"Yeah. You have to stay." Nicky added.

"_Yeah_!" Blaine said, pointing a finger at Kurt. "You hear them, Kurt?"

"Fine. Sophie and I will just lie down and snuggle." Kurt said, picking Sophie up out of her basinet and laying in the bed. "Won't we, Sophie Boo?"

Sophie gurgled, grabbing his finger.

"Alright. Baby distraction operation complete." Blaine said after making a walkie-talkie noise. "Commence phase two."

"What's phase two?" Nicky asked before making a walkie-talkie noise himself.

"Food." Zachy said.

Blaine and Nicky both stared at him.

"Do I have to do the noise?" Zachy whined. When he didn't get an answer he sighed and said, "Food." before making a walkie-talkie noise.

"Roger!" Nicky ran to the kitchen.

"Operation cheesecake from the Cheesecake Factory was also a success." Blaine said. "I hid it behind a bucket of chicken."

"Daddy would never look back there." Zachy giggled.

"I know Daddy better than anyone else. Don't tell me how to pull a fast one." Blaine grinned, pulling the cheesecake out so it could thaw. "Alright. Daddy likes his sandwich with Virginia baked ham with barbecue potato chips. Munchie, get the chips. Pooh Bear, get the ham and bread."

Both twins blinked at him.

"What are you waiting for? Operation two cannot be complete without the essentials. This whole day rests on your shoulders!" Blaine exclaimed dramatically.

Nicky and Zachy began making walkie-talkie noise.

"Of course! How could I forget!" Blaine smacked his forehead before making the noise again. "You, chips. You, sandwich things. Go, go."

Nicky and Zachy ran in opposite directions, scrambling to gather all the items. Blaine hurriedly grabbed a stack of paper plates, a basket, and some napkins.

"Ready, Dad!" Nicky said.

Blaine quickly assembled four sandwiches. "Quick! Grab baby food! Only the best in the land!"

"I can reach the sweet potatoes!" Zachy said.

"Sweet potatoes for a sweet baby!" Blaine gasped. "It's a go!"

Zachy giggled and grabbed two jars of baby food, carrying them and placing them in the basket that was on the floor. Nicky added in the plates and napkins.

"Good job, men. I was afraid we weren't going to make it there for a few minutes." Blaine said as he neatly placed their sandwiches in the basket, making his voice gruff. "I'll get the drinks and you go get Daddy."

"DADDYYYYY!" Zachy yelled, running to the master bedroom. "Come on!"

"That was… really fast." Kurt said, sitting up.

"Come on." Zachy said, waving at Sophie who watched him with round eyes.

"What do we have here?" Kurt asked when he made it into the kitchen.

"We have a picnic." Blaine informed him. "I found a red and white checkered table-cloth for our picnic table and everything."

"You mean that children's picnic table?" Kurt questioned.

"We've all sat on it before." Blaine said airily, lifting the basket. "Nicky already took the drinks out. And Sophie's swing."

"It's shady out too!" Zachy chirped, following Kurt and Blaine out of the house and into their back yard.

"We can take turns feeding Sophie." Blaine said, sitting down next to Zachy on the picnic table.

"Looks like I get to sit with Pooh Bear." Kurt sat next to his oldest son and kissed the top of his head.

"Dad, did we do Father's Day good?" Zachy asked, looking up at Blaine.

"I think you guys did father's day _spectacularly_!" Blaine said energetically. "I got breakfast made by you two. Daddy gets a picnic dinner made by you two. We had an awesome time eating lunch today as a family."

"The only thing that would make it _perfect_ would be cheesecake." Kurt said, arching his eyebrow at Blaine.

Nicky and Zachy exchanged gleeful grins, showing all their teeth.

'_You know?' _Blaine mouthed.

'_I always know.' _Kurt mouthed back before reaching to ruffle Zachy's hair. "But nothing else would make it perfect."

"WE GOT CHEESECAKE!" Nicky shrieked, unable to contain his excitement.

"CHOCOLATE CHEESECAKE!" Zachy added.

"You _did_?" Kurt exclaimed, jaw dropping. "You boy's just made Father's Day _perfect_!"

"I told you real food was better than mud pies." Zachy said.

"Yeah well I still wanna know why all the pee never comes." Nicky tilted his head.

"Wait, what?" Blaine asked, looking confused.

"I'll fill you in later, babe." Kurt promised, reaching over and patting his hand.

"I always miss the good stuff."


	12. Sex Dreams

"Anything you'd like to tell us, Blainers?" Wes asked cheerfully, sliding into the seat next to Blaine's in the cafeteria.

"What are you talking about?" Blaine asked as he peeled an orange and yawned.

"_Oh, Kurt_…"

"What?" Blaine yelped, glancing around the cafeteria. Luckily nobody heard and even more luckily the before mentioned boy was nowhere to be seen. Not that Kurt would have come in seeing as he was now back at McKinley but it was turning into an automatic reflex when he heard Kurt's name while at school.

"What are we doing?" David asked, setting a plate down and then sitting on Blaine's other side.

"Discussing Blaine's sex dream." Wes chirped.

"You don't even room with him. I do. How do you even know about those?"

"_You do_?" Blaine's eyes widened.

"You talk during them." David grinned. "It's almost cute. I kind of feel sorry for you considering the lack of action you're getting."

"I am not suffering from lack of action." Blaine huffed. "There is plenty of… action."

"So you've done it?"

"No but we've touched."

"Sliding your hands into the back of his pants don't count." Wes snorted loudly. "Oh, Blaine… I bet Kurt has no idea how horny of a person you are yet, does he?"

"We've only been dating two months. Of course he doesn't." Blaine snapped.

"Yet you've already had your hands down the back of his pants." David cooed. "How precious."

"I am never telling you two anything ever again." Blaine vowed.

"It's not our fault you're dating a virgin." Wes snorted.

"It's okay. I'm sure he'll let you take his pants off in a year or two." David teased. "Oh, Blaine, if you could hear some of the stuff that you say when you have sex dreams…"

"I hope you don't say those things when you actually have sex." Wes laughed loudly. "You'll end up single."

"Can we stop talking about my sex life, or lack thereof, in the Dalton cafeteria?" Blaine hissed, standing up.

"Leaving to go jerk off? Or sext Kurt?"

"You act like I'm perpetually horny or something!" Blaine snapped.

"You have been having very… intense sex dreams for weeks." David said. "Not to mention the fact that we all know you can get a little carried away when it comes to…"

"Having sex." Wes finished.

"I'm not a whore." Blaine scoffed. "And I haven't had sex since I was sixteen. I just turned eighteen."

"We didn't say you're a whore." David said. "You're just a man who likes his needs met."

"Only you just so happen to be dating a virgin and Kurt probably would think it was too sexy to show you his shoulder." Wes giggled loudly.

"Leave Kurt alone." Blaine snapped. "If you must know, he's been trying to nudge towards taking things a little farther and I'm the one that's putting a stopper on it."

"Have you lost your damn mind? Let him give you a hand job so you'll quit moaning all night." David said, staring at him in shock. "For my sake if anything! I'm considering purchasing ear plugs, Blaine. Ear plugs."

"I wouldn't expect either of you two to understand my reasoning since you two don't have a brain that thinks beyond what's in your pants." Blaine said, standing up and grabbing his messenger bag. "And for the record, my hands weren't in his pants. They were in his boxers. _The front_. So take that and stick it you know where."

"Wait, wait, wait. You and Kurt are in groping territory now?" David asked a little louder than necessary, causing a few eyebrows in the cafeteria to rise.

"Not that it is any of your business, but yes."

"That's why the dreams are getting worse. They've gotten farther." Wes gasped. "Oh man, David. You better hope they don't start having sex. Who knows what will happen then."

"I can't believe you didn't tell us that you and Kurt—."

"It was once. We got carried away and it's not happened against since." Blaine said shortly.

"_Aww, Kurt and Blaine are too embarrassed to give each other hand jobs again_!" David and Wes cooed together.

"Keep your voices down!" Blaine hissed.

"At least we don't have to worry about Blaine and Kurt getting STDs from each other." David snorted.

"Gotta have sex to get those! And you, my friend, aren't getting _any_!" Wes grinned. "I'll buy you some boxes of tissues, Blainers. No need to thank me."

"Why can't I have normal people in my life for once?" Blaine moaned as he left the cafeteria.

"We've got at least three more months before they have sex." Wes' grin grew.

"That is at least three months of teasing and mocking." David smirked. "I'm so glad we adopted him. Aren't you?"

"And he's come so far." Wes wiped an invisible tear from his eye. "Our baby's all grown up and having naughty dreams about his first love."

"We'll have to add it to the baby book."


	13. Babies Warning: Daddy Is Pretty Now

"Paint Daddy's nails next." Four year old Sophie chirped, sitting across from Blaine with her hands flat on the table as he painted her nails a pretty pale purple. She kicked out her feet excitedly.

"Sophie, nail polish is for _girls_." Blaine laughed. "Daddy's usually don't wear nail polish."

"But Daddy, I has the perfect color for your comdection." Sophie protested.

"You _have _the perfect color or my _complexion_." Blaine corrected. "And you also are spending entirely too much time with Kurt."

Sophie giggled.

"Do you even know what a complexion is?" Blaine asked her, moving to her right hand.

"Uh huh."

"What? Huh? What?" Blaine grinned.

"I dunno." Sophie giggled, pulling her hand away and covering her face.

Blaine leaned over the little TV dinner table they were using, tickling her sides. "I thought you said you knew what it was!"

"I dunno! I dunno!" She shrieked, flailing in her chair. "I dunno!"

Blaine cackled and then quit tickling her. "That's why we don't lie, Monkey."

"Cause Daddy's a big haired meany face?" Sophie pouted.

"Oh, Daddy isn't mean." Blaine kissed the top of her hair. "And you need to come up with your own insults. I hear Kurt's enough as it is."

Sophie giggled and pet his face. "Pretty hand." She then raised her right hand. "Not pretty."

"Impatient." Blaine laughed, putting her hand flat on the table and beginning to paint the rest of her finger nails.

"Daddy next." Sophie said, legs beginning to swing again excitedly.

"No, I don't think so." Blaine sang.

"I dooo." Sophie sang back.

"Well I'm _older_." Blaine tapped her nose.

"I'm prettier!"

"Well you've got that right. You can't be prettier than the most prettiest person in the whole wide world!" Blaine dramatically sighed. "I guess you win. What color?"

"It's gonna be a surprise, Daddy." Sophie said before pursing her lips together.

_Oh boy_, Blaine thought to himself as he put the cap back on the purple nail polish. "Give it a few minutes to dry and then we can begin the torture."

"Timer please!" Sophie chirped.

Blaine set his cell phone timer to three minutes, watching her rock back and forth impatiently until it went off. After that, she ran back and hauled in a box holding all of her nail polishes.

"I see you and Daddy have added to the collection." Blaine noted.

"I get a new color every Tuesday." Sophie informed him. "Don't look!"

"Well what am I supposed to look at?"

"Dunno." Sophie giggled again and pulled herself up on the chair across from him, several bottles in her hands. He could only see the tops, though, so he had no idea what colors they were.

"Are you sure Daddy has to do this?" Blaine asked.

"Yep!"

_Kurt better have bought more finger nail polish remover... _Blaine thought to himself.

"No looking!" Sophie scolded as Blaine's eyes wandered to the bottles she was placing on the table.

"Sorry! Sorry!" Blaine looked at the TV across the room, happy to find out that UK was still winning the basketball game he'd been watching before Sophie demanded her fingernails be painted—and no, Blaine could not root for any college team that was not UK. He'd tried back when the team had had a really bad run three years in a row, but even then he couldn't move on.

It seemed like only seconds before Sophie pulled his attention back. "All done and so pretty!"

Blaine looked at his nails, which were each about a million colors swirled together. The art of a four-year old, for sure. "Oh… wow."

"Daddy is pretty now." Sophie smiled sweetly. "But not as pretty as me."

Blaine rolled his eyes and then kissed her cheek. "Thank you. I hope you remember I let you do this when you're fourteen and hate me. Kurt would never let you paint his nails."

Sophie kissed his cheek back.

"Now put your stuff up."

"Okay, Daddy." Sophie ran off with her box of nail polish.

Blaine rushed into the bathroom, pulling the nail polish remover out so he wouldn't forget to take it off before going to bed. He would probably not enjoy going into work tomorrow looking like a pastel rainbow had thrown up on his fingernails.

…

"Blaine." Bob hissed.

"Yeah?" Blaine asked.

Bob pointed down at his nails and then glanced over at the clients they were seeing, a couple who were in their forties. No way to get it off.

"I forgot. _Fuck_." Blaine muttered. "Maybe they won't notice."

"Right." Bob snorted ahead into the office, but Blaine saw him laughing when he thought Blaine wasn't looking.

Blaine introduced himself as usual to the clients, smiling cheerfully as ever. His smile wavered a bit when the woman glanced down at his hand and then back up at him.

"I have a little girl." Blaine said apologetically. "And I forgot to take it off before I went to bed apparently."

"How old is she?" The woman laughed.

"Old enough to know better but young enough that I can't say no." Blaine sighed. "She's mastered the pout."

"She must be a toddler." The woman said.

"Four." Blaine nodded.

"And she's already mastered the pout? You're in trouble." Her husband said.

"Big trouble. She's Daddy's girl and has me wrapped around her finger." Blaine raised his hand and then pushed open the door to their meeting room. "Apparently. But we can go on in, Bob's getting the papers set up for you."

The people walked in, sitting at the table. Bob came over, looked at Blaine, and just laughed silently.

Blaine was really going to have to learn how to say no to Sophie.


	14. Haircut

"Do it."

"But…" Wes said.

"Blaine, you don't really want to do this. You love your curls." David said reasonably from Wes' bed where he was flipping through an anatomy magazine.

"Yeah, when I was fourteen I did. But I'm going to be sixteen in a week. It's time for a change." Blaine took a deep breath. "Do it."

"But… it's the curls." Wes whined.

"Wes likes your curls more than _you _do." David snorted.

"They're soft." Wes snapped. "It's like a cloud on his head."

"Oh my God, you did not just say that. They have got to go. Do it now." Blaine said, reaching over and grabbing the scissors off of Wes' nightstand. "Cut. Them. Wes.

"No."

"Cut them, Wesley."

"You do it." Wes said, crossing his arms over his chest so he could not take the scissors.

"I can't cut my own hair! It will look more deformed than it looks like _this_."

"Have you thought this through?" Wes asked hesitantly, lowering his arms.

"I look like a little kid." Blaine said. "It's time."

"You don't look like a little kid." David rolled his eyes. "You look like Blaine."

"Do it, do it, now." Blaine said, carefully handing Wes the scissors.

"David, you're the sensible one! Talk him out of it!"

"It's just hair." David shrugged. "It will grow back."

"But the poof…" Wes frowned. "_The poof_."

Blaine took a deep breath and closed his eyes. "Rest in peace, poofy hair. I would like to look sixteen, please."

"So why are your eyes closed then? You look pretty scared to me." David teased, earning a glare from both Blaine and Wes.

"Because I'm trying to not look as you cut my hair off. Start it, start it." Blaine said after closing his eyes again.

Wes took a deep breath and raised the scissors up.

"No! Wait!" Blaine yelped, throwing his hands up. "I need a minute."

"With your hair?" David echoed.

"Shut up. At least I have hair." Blaine took a deep breath. "Okay, you can continue…"

"You good?" Wes asked.

"I'm good." Blaine nodded and waited, cracking open an eye when Wes put the scissors to his hair.

"Don't watch!" Wes yelped.

"Oh my God, you two are insane. How did I end up friends with you?" David shook his head. "It's only gotten worse in the last year and a half that Blaine's been here."

Blaine just grinned at him sweetly. "You're welcome."

"Oh? For making my life increasingly more dif—."

"WHAT DID YOU DO, WES?!" Blaine exclaimed.

"You told me to cut it!"

"But I was having my moment!"

Wes dropped two curls into Blaine's open palm. "Farewell, thy good Poof. You shall forever be missed and shit."

"I cannot believe you just did—_that_." Blaine whimpered and closed his eyes, covering his face with his hands. "Tell me when I can look."

…

"Hot damn." Wes gasped.

"What? Does it look bad?" Blaine cracked open an eye.

"If we thought Thad was bad before, he's going to be a nightmare." David sighed. "Great going, Wes. You've created a gay dude magnet. Dalton will never be the same for the gay students."

"Oh my God. My ears are cold." Blaine whined, padding into the bathroom. They heard something drop and then a, "Oh shit. That's what my face looks like?"


	15. Babies Warning: Valentine's Day

"So you two are letting the kids pick out your Valentine's gifts? That's _cuuuute_." Alec said, sitting down at Kurt's office table.

"Blaine came up with the idea. I had to remind him that the last time we let the kids pick our presents Sophie got him glue sticks." Kurt rolled his eyes, smiling. "So now he has this Disney glue stick collection on our dresser and he won't let me do anything with it."

Alec snorted. "What did you end up with?"

"Miracle Gro."

Alec let out a loud laugh as Blaine came into the office.

"Oh no, what did I walk in to?" Blaine sauntered over and bent, kissing Kurt's cheek.

"Glue pens and Miracle Gro." Alec explained, waving.

"Eric work tonight?" Blaine asked.

Alec nodded. "Yeah. Until three in the morning. But it's okay. I'm going to make food for everyone and hang out in the break room."

"Kurt used to cook for the people at my office. You know, until he made it on his own. Now half the time _I _feed the kids." Blaine said as Kurt gathered his belongings to go home.

"_That _is scary after what happened on Thanksgiving."

"Shh. Don't mention it. He's still mad I set the oven to clean." Blaine whispered loudly.

"I told you _exactly _what to push." Kurt called from the other side of the studio. "We had to eat Denny's."

Blaine gave Alec a 'eh' look and shrugged one shoulder.

Alec snorted and stood. "I'll see you tomorrow, Kurt. You all have a fantabulous Valentine's Day."

"I'll pray you and Eric find time to get laid in a janitor's closet." Blaine winked as Alec left. He then looked to Kurt. "What?"

Kurt just shook his head. "You. Where are the children?"

"I got held up on a case so Wes got them." Blaine led Kurt out of the studio. "If someone tries to make you stay, you say _no_."

"I know, I know, I know."

"Workaholic." Blaine held open the door for him. "After you, sir."

"So well-mannered." Kurt smiled and rushed to the car.

"Here's how it works. We open the gifts from the kids to us and have dinner. Then when the kids are in bed we exchange the _real _gifts and then give each other the best gift of all."

"Our bodies?" Kurt asked.

"Our bodies."

…

"It's near bedtime and they haven't given us the gifts." Blaine pouted. "I know the cards they made isn't it because I took them shopping for you."

Kurt rolled his eyes and kissed Blaine. "Why are you so eager if you don't know what your gift is?"

"I know it involves potato candy." Blaine bounced up and down a bit.

"You can't have anything be a surprise, can you?" Kurt sighed and shook his head.

"I'm sorry but you suck at cleaning up the kitchen on your days off work." Blaine shrugged, glancing at the twins who were busy playing with toy dinosaurs. "How is that more interesting than giving me my potato candy a whole, like, nine months early?"

Kurt stood from his seat on the couch and then made his way over to his sons, kneeling down. "Kiddies, dada over here is having a conniption about his gift. So can we please have our presents now?"

"No." Zach said sharply.

"Yeah. We got them, we'll give them." Nick nodded.

"Yeah, _dads_." Sophie pulled a face.

"Oh yeah? Oh yeah?" Blaine ran over, scooping her off of the floor.

"NO!" Sophie shrieked, now upside down and kicking her feet in the direction of Blaine's face. "NO NO NO NO NO BAD DADDY BAD!"

"I can't believe my children just told me no." Kurt said, staring at them in disbelief.

"Give me my gifts, I said! Give me my gifts!" Blaine yelled, tossing her onto the couch and tickling her. "Give 'em!"

"NO NO NOOOOO!" Sophie burst into loud giggles.

"Unfair advantage!" Nick declared, running forward and jumping onto Blaine's back. He then wrapped his arms around Blaine's neck. "Giddy up, cowboy!"

"I am so sorry your life has to be this way." Kurt said, sitting down by Zach.

"It's okay." Zach shrugged one shoulder, looking so much like Blaine that it wasn't even funny.

Kurt ruffled his hair, watching in amusement as the kids somehow got Blaine on the floor and were now pouncing on and off of him. "You're my only sane child, Zach. In fact, we are the only two sane people in this house."

"I know." Zach reached up, patting Kurt's hand.

"Go on." Kurt rolled his eyes.

Zach ran over, jumping on Blaine's stomach and letting out a gleeful giggle. Kurt watched them, smiling happily. He'd always known Blaine would be an amazing father, but he'd never known just how _perfect _he would be. He didn't expect how watching Blaine with their children would make him feel.

"Oof!" Blaine groaned. "Not all three. I can't handle all three of you."

"Admit defeat!" Nick yelled. "Admit de-feeeeeat!"

"I don't remember what we were fighting about." Blaine oofed again and Sophie sat on his chest.

"Me neither." Nick admitted, sitting on the floor next to him.

"Drats. Are we done already?" Zach pouted.

"Shouldn't have waited til the end." Nick pulled Sophie off Blaine.

Blaine looked at Zach, smirked, and rolled on top of him.

"NO DADDY NO!" Zach whined, arms and legs attempting to flail.

"You said you didn't want it to end!" Blaine cackled, tickling Zach.

"Oh my God." Kurt shook his head as Zach alternated between begging for Blaine to get off and letting out the loudest laughs Kurt had ever heard come from a seven year old. "Blaine, if you keep it up you're gonna make him sick."

Blaine pouted but sat up, ruffling Zach's dark curls. "Don't mess with the man, son."

Zach giggled, standing shakily.

"Presents _now_?" Blaine asked.

"Say please." Nick grinned.

"Are _you _going to talk about manners?" Kurt asked, giving Nick an incredulous look. "You can't leave the kitchen table unless you burp exactly five times."

"Grandpa thinks it's funny."

"Yeah well grandpa thinks a lot of gross stuff is funny." Kurt scoffed.

"Are you gonna make us go to bed after the gifts?" Zach asked.

"Oh yes." Kurt nodded. "Yes, we are."

"Does that mean the funny noises are going to start?"

"What funny noises?" Blaine raised his eyebrow.

"Every time it's a holiday there is funny noises." Zach said.

"Ryan said his parents make the funny noises too. And he says that's how babies are born. But his daddy sticks his pee pee in his mommy's hooha and you guys don't have a hooha." Nick informed Kurt and Blaine.

"What's a hooha?" Sophie asked.

"Present time. _Now_." Kurt said, scooping Sophie up.

"Drats." Nick ran off to get the presents.

"I'll help." Zach bustled off.

"Why are our seven-year olds talking about pee pees in hoohas?" Kurt whispered, placing his hands over Sophie's ears after setting her down..

"Probably because Ryan has an older brother in middle school." Blaine whispered back. "Now _I'm _tired."

"Do we need to… address the… pee pee and hooha?"

"I'll talk to Ryan's dad tomorrow." Blaine bent down and kissed Sophie's cheek. "Hey, pretty girl."

Sophie giggled. "Hi, daddy."

"Presents!" Nick announced as they brought in two boxes. "On the floor."

"These pants are—."

"Kurt, just sit down." Blaine said, swatting Kurt's ass.

Kurt halfheartedly glared before slowly sitting on the ground in front of his box.

Blaine plopped down as well, pulling out a tin of potato candy. "You _kids_know the way to my heart."

Kurt elbowed Blaine's side.

"They're _heart-shaped_! You can make them into shapes?!" Blaine exclaimed.

"Well they're _sort of _heart-shaped. I tried." Kurt gave him a small smile and then gasped, "Oh my God this is that chocolate like we had on our honeymoon! You know, the real one not that two-day thing right after the wedding."

"Maybe I sneaked something in that was _just _from me." Blaine grinned, eyes getting all crinkly and nose scrunching up adorably. He then raised his eyebrow. "Is this a rock or dog poop? Or do I want to know?"

"It's a hardened mud pie." Nick supplied. "There are worms in the middle."

Blaine gagged a bit.

Kurt warily looked into his box. "Is that…"

"It's better to not ask." Blaine peeked in. "Where's the stuff we _bought _with them?"

"We thought you'd like this better." Zach chirped.

"You were so right. I love… dead roly poly bugs." Kurt said.

"We had caught a butterfly but it flew away." Zach frowned.

Kurt forced a smile and pulled out a piece of paper that said "WILL RUB NOSE FOR FREE" in Sophie's handwriting.

Blaine peeked over and snorted loudly. "Cheapest gift I ever had to give."

Kurt rolled his eyes. "What else did I give you?"

"A toilet paper roll." Blaine held it up. "It says I love you on it. And there's a turtle sticker inside."

"And a glued noodle." Nick pointed.

"Thank you kids _very _much." Kurt said giving a big smile.

"Yes. Thank you. These are the best gifts we've ever given to one another." Blaine said, expression serious. "But now it's bedtime."

"Teeth brushed. Upstairs. Get to it." Kurt pointed, scooting closer to Blaine.

Blaine watched the stairs until the kids were out of sight and then leaned in. "We've got to find those real presents. And then have sex."

"You mean you don't wanna rub my nose?" Kurt pouted, leaning in as well.

Blaine kissed his cheek and whispered in a low, sultry voice, "Oh I'll rub your nose… and your side… and your thighs… and your di…"

"DADDY, NICKY STOLE THE TOOTHPASTE!"

"DADA, I CAN'T REACH THE SINK!"

Kurt sat up, kissing Blaine quickly. "Ten minutes and we can pick up where we're leaving off now."

Blaine reached up, rubbing Kurt's nose and grinning. "I'll be waiting, my love."

"Ah ah ah. You held spawn them; you'll help get them in bed, _my love_."

"Drats." Blaine mocked his sons, standing up and rolling his neck a few times.

"Told you that you were getting too old to roughhouse." Kurt sang before running up the stairs.

"You lost your Valentine's rose petals and candles for that comment!" Blaine called after him.

"Guess I won't be losing the underwear then!" Kurt whispered loudly, leaning over the top of the stairs.

"Oh, no you don't." Blaine ran up after him. "That is not even funny."


	16. AU WBUCT Chapter: Drunk Wes and Blaine

_What would have happened if Blaine and Wes were together at the apartment when they got drunk and Kurt and David had to deal with the two of them drunk._

"What… did… you… _do_?" Kurt hissed, closing the door behind David.

"Uh… Wow, Blaine's right. You can be kind of scary." David said, actually stepping back. "And really, Kurt, it's not what _I _did, but what your loving boyfriend did -Blaine, I don't think it's the time."

"I love you so much, Kurt." Blaine slurred, arms going around Kurt's waist and lips trailing sloppy kisses over his face. "You're fucking gorgeous."

"Blaine, stop it." David said, tugging Blaine away from Kurt.

"I thought we weren't drinking." Kurt said very slowly, eyeing Blaine.

"_Whoops_?" Blaine said, tilting his head to the side and shrugging.

"It's my fault! Mine!" Wes cheered, coming up and ruffling Kurt's hair. "Were you sleeping, Kurt? I like your sweat pants!"

"Oh my God, David. I thought you were supposed to _watch _them." Kurt hissed.

"I had to go to the bathroom. I came back and Blaine was already halfway drunk. Wes had been trying to persuade him all—_Wes_! We do not climb on furniture! Not all of us are as tiny as Blaine!"

"Why does Blaine get to have all the fun?" Wes whined, pointing at Blaine who was attempting to climb on the coffee table.

"No, no, no, Blaine. You're going to fall off and hurt yourself." David yelped, snapping his fingers at Kurt and then pointing.

Kurt rushed over. "Come on, _dear who was not supposed to drink_."

"My knight in shining armor." Blaine gasped, absolutely beaming as Kurt helped him down. "You saved my luh-iiife. You're so beeeeautiful."

"Let's… Let's sing, guys. We like to sing." Wes slurred as David set him on the couch. "Let's sing a gay ol' song and have a gay ol' time cause the gays outrank the straights… no… there's five… four. It looks like there are two Kurts and that's—that's scary."

"I might scare you here in a minute." Kurt said, easing Blaine onto the couch. "Why did you bring both of them?"

"Blaine's the love of your life, right?" David smirked. "Welcome to my life, partner. I almost took both of them back to my place before I remembered, 'Ah! Blaine has a boyfriend who would _love _to help clean his vomit now.'"

"I feel that like that is a trick statement." Kurt muttered.

"And he had Vodka. He's never handled it well." David added thoughtfully. "It should be more manageable with both of us."

"You think?" Kurt asked as Blaine began to loudly sing. "You realize both he and I work tomorrow? He's supposed to drive to Kentucky for his shift at Kennedy's in—_four hours_."

"Oh, he won't be working. And you'll need to call in too." David said. "Say he's got the stomach bug. Just hold the phone as he pukes… and you work for your dad."

"Yes. I'll just call my father and tell him that I can't come into work today because Blaine got drunk." Kurt snapped.

"Whatcha talkin' 'bout?" Wes asked, coming over and draping an arm around Kurt's shoulders. "Hey, Kurtsie. Hi. Your boyfriend—he's really, really, really fun. Like… _so much fun_. Are you… Are you a fun drunk? I bet you're a funny drunk, Kurtsie Loo Who."

"I DIDN'T KISS ANY GIRLS!" Blaine ran over—well, stumbled, really. "Blaine—No, I'm Blaine. _Kurt_, I kissed no one tonight!"

"Last night." David sighed. "It's three in the morning."

"Blaine, why did you drink tonight?" Kurt asked very calmly, placing his hands on Blaine's cheeks.

"I'unno. Wes is very per… persuasive." Blaine shook his head until Kurt moved his hands and then nuzzled the side of Kurt's face. "You feel good. Smell. Feel. Good. Yum."

"Alright there." Kurt yelped as Blaine began to kiss his neck, causing Wes to snicker and David—who had never seen Blaine display that much affection—to stare in shock. "Blaine, really—_Blaine_!" Kurt gently pushed Blaine off of him.

"The yummy's gone." Blaine frowned.

"Oh my God. He's worse than drunk." Kurt sighed, rubbing his forehead. "I can't believe this."

"Me neither!" Wes chirped and giggled. "Blaine's hair's all springy bouncy. Attack of the Curls! RAWR!"

"Don't make fun of my hair!" Blaine whined loudly, leaning forward and burrowing his face in Kurt's shoulder.

"Oh my God." Kurt said, patting the back of Blaine's head. "It's okay, sweetie."

"Wes is a _meanie_." Blaine pouted.

"Nah. You love me." Wes giggled and wrapped his arms around Blaine from behind.

"No no no no no!" Blaine said, trying to nuzzle farther into Kurt. "Not yours!"

"Wes, we do not want angry Blaine drunk!" David said, pulling Wes from Blaine. "Kurt, get Blaine some water and something to eat. Nothing messy. Take him with you."

"Into a kitchen that isn't childproof?" Kurt asked warily.

"Do you want him to tackle Wes? I've seen it before. Blaine is _much _stronger than he looks. And his anger can go from zero to one hundred in five seconds flat. He'd make a lovely watch dog." David nodded towards the kitchen.

"Kurt, Kurt, Kurt!" Blaine chanted, suddenly much happier, as Kurt led him into the kitchen.

"Yes, Blaine?" Kurt sighed, arm instinctively going around Blaine's waist when he stumbled.

"There were lots of girls at the party but I didn't kiss one! I didn't kiss two or three either. I didn't kiss _anybody_ 'cause I got in trouble last night and no one kisses as good as you because your tongue is stupendous."

"I remember. You just told me. But it's good to know you've learned self-restraint." Kurt remarked, shooting a glare towards the kitchen. "Sit down, babe."

Blaine plopped onto the kitchen floor quite hard, wincing and then rubbing his knees while looking confused.

"This is going to be fun." Kurt sighed, moving to grab a glass of water but jumping when Blaine let out a high pitched shriek.

"Puppy!" Blaine squealed and moved to the floor as Kreacher pranced up excitedly. "I love the dumb stupid puppy! Dumb puppy!"

Kreacher yipped loudly, hopping onto Blaine's legs and licking his face and neck excitedly.

"He's so drunk that he doesn't even know his name, does he?" Kurt groaned as Blaine hugged Kreacher, who was so excited to be getting love from Blaine that Kurt was sure his little heart would just give out.

"Puppy, puppy, puppppppppy!" Blaine sang as he hugged Kreacher tightly. "Better than a kitty is a pupppppppy! Gimme kisses!"

Kreacher eagerly began bouncing, alternating between licking his face, neck, and arms.

"Good puppy, good puppy!"

"Doing okay in here?" David asked, poking his head in. "Oh, Blaine will refuse to believe _that_."

"Yes well he refuses to believe his love for Kreacher either way, so that doesn't surprise me." Kurt sighed as he reached down and handed Blaine some toast and a glass of water.

"More yummies!" Blaine bit into his toast. "Down, puppy. This is _Wyatt's_. Blaine's. My name is—my name is _Blaine_."

"Have we calmed down? Are you angry at Wes?" David bent down so Blaine was at eye level.

"Wessssleyyyy!" Blaine sat himself up and rushed into the living room. "Toast! Kurt made—Kurt made toast!"

"I want toast!" Wes cheered. "Can I have some?"

"Yes." Kurt called, sending a glare in David's direction. "How likely is it that they'll fall asleep within the next hour?"

"Not very likely at all. Besides, you'll end up sleeping in the bathroom floor with Blaine anyway. I wouldn't get too excited for that."

"He's never leaving this house without me again." Kurt sighed as Blaine let out a loud whoop which was followed by laughter and claps.

"Shit. He's probably trying to take his clothes off." David said, rushing off. "I don't know why he hates clothes so much when he's drunk."


	17. Babies Warning: Baby Mix Up

**_KLAINE BABIES YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!_**

* * *

"Okay, okay. See? You can do this. You are a good father. An amazing one. Three hours along and no one's dead yet. Three cheers for you, Blaine… Now I'm talking to myself."

Blaine looked down at the twins, still tiny enough that it was impossible to tell them apart unless they were in designated clothes or in their labeled basinets.

"See? Dada's good at this too. Not just daddy." Blaine told the babies, grinning. "Right? Still breathing?"

He bent down, tickling Nicky's cheek. He giggled when Nicky gave a smile. So the doctors said it was gas and not a real smile. Blaine chose to disagree.

Zachy shifted, face screwing up. A sure sign he was about to cry.

"No, no, no." Blaine lifted him out of the basinet that was clearly labeled 'Zachary.' Zach relaxed in Blaine's arms, snuggling close to his chest. "Phew."

Nick let out a loud and sudden cry, arms and legs beginning to flail. This prompted a similar reaction from Zachy, who began to wail in Blaine's arms.

"Nooo. This is what I _didn't _want to happen." Blaine whimpered, lifting Nick out of his basinet as well and attempting to rock both of them. Kurt was better at this than him.

Miraculously, his way seemed to work just fine. Within two minutes, both babies were calmed down and he had put them back into one of the basinets and then—

"Oh… shit." Blaine's eyes widened in horror.

What had—

Which one had he put down first?

He knew he had picked Zachy up first, so maybe that one was—

But no—

Maybe—

"This is Full House all over again without the booties… and I don't have ink to test their footprints…" Blaine muttered to himself as the twins curled together, now fast asleep and looking _freaking identical_.

Wait! Their eyes!

No.

They had the same eyes. _His _eyes.

Damn.

Double damn.

Literally.

No, it wasn't the time for jokes.

"Okay. Deep breaths. You have a Harvard degree. You are smart. There is a simple solution to this without running to buy ink and without telling Kurt… Maybe I should call Kurt.. HAHA no. Maybe you aren't smart."

Blaine groaned.

"Why did my sperm split? Seriously? This is God's cruel joke. I have literally no idea which baby is who. My children will never know who they are and it's entirely my fault. They are identity-less. They will hate me forever. Because they will never know who they are because I can _never _let Kurt know because he'll never trust me with them again and even if I buy ink later, he'll see it on their feet and… Fucking hell."

The babies slept on, completely oblivious to Blaine's angry mutterings.

"Nick, wake up."

No reaction.

"Yeah. Right. Like my two week old son will just wake up because I say his name." Blaine huffed, crossing his arms over his chest.

…

"Uh… hey." Blaine mumbled when Kurt made his way into the house.

"How did it go?" Kurt asked cheerfully.

"Uhm…"

"What happened?" Kurt's eyes widened and he rushed across the hall and into the twins' nursery.

Blaine followed him, looking embarrassed. "I am _so _sorry. They were crying and I picked them up to try to calm them down, but I accidentally put them in one basinet. I'll go and get ink and—."

Kurt stepped up, interrupting him with a quick kiss. "Do you want to know a secret?"

"I don't think it's the time to be telling secrets. Our children are mixed up." Blaine scoffed.

"I mixed them up last week." Kurt admitted, going to the dresser and pulling out an ink pad from behind some of the little baby socks.

"Wait. You did?" Blaine asked.

"Yes… After— This will sound creepy… But I looked them over to find_something _to tell them apart… Look." Kurt undid a onesie on one of the babies a bit and then lifted him, placing him in the crib that said 'Zachary' after buttoning the outfit back up.

"Huh?" Blaine asked, looking confused.

Kurt didn't speak, lifting the other baby out of the basinet and undoing his onesie also, pointing to his stomach. "Look at this. Nicky has a freckle on his stomach."

Blaine bent, looking at his son's stomach. "He does."

"Zachy has one on his shoulder." Kurt looked at Blaine sheepishly. "Zachy has a birthmark on his leg too."

"So what I'm getting from this is that… you actually mixed them up first?" Blaine smirked.

"And you didn't tell me?"

"I was afraid you wouldn't trust me with them." Kurt admitted, looking down.

"How on Earth are we ever going to get these boys to the age of eighteen?" Blaine asked softly, looking down at both of his son's.

Kurt eased Nicky down into his basinet. "I don't know… but if Finn and Rachel's daughter hasn't died yet, I bet we'll be okay."

Blaine giggled, wrapping his arms around Kurt. "I can't believe the perfect Kurt Anderson-Hummel mixed up Zach and Nick first."

"This is why I don't tell you stuff." Kurt teased, running his fingers through Blaine's hair.

Blaine grinned and kissed him. "Don't worry. I'm sure I'll mix them up again and have to call you, asking which has what birthmark where."

"This is very true." Kurt relaxed against Blaine as one of the babies sneezed.

"Awww, he's so cute." Blaine cooed.

"Bless you." Kurt cooed, touching the baby's cheek. "Bless you, bless you."

"This is going to be a long eighteen years." Blaine looked at Kurt.

"Technically twenty. You know we're due to have baby number two… well, technically three now… in two years." Kurt looked back at him.

"It better be a girl." Kurt sighed. "If I got stuck with four boys, I don't know what I'd do."

"That's all you, my love. I did my job with these two. Blaine pointed at their sons.

"Overachiever." Kurt muttered.

Blaine smirked. "You're welcome."


	18. Missing Moments

_**Klaine Week 2012 Day Three: Missing Moments**_

"Okay, okay, okay." Kurt panted, pushing Blaine away gently.

"What?"

"As much as I _love _kissing you…"

"Then why stop?" Blaine asked, leaning forward.

"What are we?" Kurt asked, pulling back.

"W-What?" Blaine said, trying to catch his breath.

"We've spent the last three days kissing a lot but… we haven't talked about _it_." Kurt pointed out.

"Oh! Oh, right, yeah. Talking. About it. We should—we should definitely talk about it. Let's talk." Blaine nodded.

"In a minute." Kurt said, pulling Blaine towards him and into another kiss.

"Or five." Blaine mumbled into his lips, hands resting on Kurt's waist.

"Definitely no more than ten."

…

"It's been an hour." Blaine moaned, pulling away.

"But somewhere it is still five, so it's only been like one minute if we look at it that way." Kurt argued.

"You were the one who wanted to talk about it, though. We should—we should talk about it. Right?"

"Talking is vastly overrated." Kurt said, causing Blaine to let out an adorable laugh and smile which in turn led to Kurt's heart fluttering more than it already was. Truth be told, it really hadn't stopped doing that since their first kiss.

"If I ask you to be my boyfriend, Kurt, will you say yes?" Blaine asked, still slightly breathless from all of their kissing.

"I might." Kurt said, giving Blaine the same impish smile that had been on his face before their second kiss.

"Mmh, I think you will." Blaine smiled.

"You're awfully confident, Blaine Anderson." Kurt smirked.

"Hmm… Will you be my boyfriend?" Blaine asked, kissing Kurt's cheek in a positively adorable way.

"I'd have to say yes considering we've been making out nonstop for three days." Kurt laughed. "Which makes us unofficial boyfriends, really."

"Will you be my _official_ boyfriend?" Blaine grinned.

"I would _love_ to be your official boyfriend." Kurt said, leaning forward and kissing him.

"Wait wait wait. Question before the whole making out thing—which is totally awesome, by the way." Blaine interrupted, pulling back.

"Okay. What?" Kurt asked as he laughed, hand midway to Blaine's face.

"Can we not make it Facebook Official until after regionals?" Blaine asked.

"Don't want Wes to win that bet, huh?" Kurt asked, kissing him

"You know me too well." Blaine smiled into his lips before kissing back.


	19. AU: Musician Klaine

**Klaine Week 2012 Day Two: AU Klaine**

"I don't even know what he's like in person. His people just sent over his measurements and he's dropping by for his fitting today."

"He's so yummy." Rachel squealed. "Can you try to get a picture?"

"He's a singer, not a piece of meat." Kurt said irritably. "Plus, it's against policy to take pictures of celebrities."

"It's _your _policy." Rachel pointed out.

"I'm not going to take a picture of him, Rachel. He could end up being a huge client for me. Do you know how many Top Ten hits he's had in the last year?"

"Nine." Rachel let out a dreamy sigh. "And they're all amazing."

"Exactly. And all of his fans will see him in _my _clothes." Kurt said. "But you get the point, right? _I'm not taking a picture of him_."

"Fine, fine. But I'll remember that the next time I see somebody famous who _you _like." Rachel whined. "What about an autograph, Kurt?"

"No." Kurt said, slightly louder than necessary.

"You suck. Call me when you're on your way home?"

"Sure. Bye, Rach." Kurt said, hanging up and tossing his cellphone carelessly into his drawer.

"Kurt, they're here." A woman said, poking her head into Kurt's office.

"Tell them I'll be right there." Kurt said and went to grab the clothes that had been made especially for the singer Blaine Anderson.

…

"They're too loose." A tall man, Blaine Anderson's manager, said as he surveyed the second suit.

"They feel and look fine." Blaine Anderson protested, just as he had with the first suit. Then again, Kurt suspected anything would look good on _this _man who was actually even more attractive in person—how did _that_ happen? He had been shocked to learn most of the celebrities he'd worked with were incredibly computer enhanced, but Blaine Anderson… nope.

"No. They're too loose." The man said irritably, pointing. "It looks bad here. It looks like you've gained weight."

"That makes no sense. You just said they were loose." Blaine said, sending the man a look.

Kurt clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth and then bit his tongue. _Don't say anything… Don't say anything…_If there was one thing he hated, though, it was celebrity managers who thought they knew fashion when they clearly didn't. The suit fit Blaine Anderson like it was made for him, just like it had been.

"It's not good enough." The manager argued.

"You don't know what you're talking about." Blaine said, looking annoyed.

"You look horrible in that."

"Excuse me." Kurt said, struggling to maintain a polite voice. If Kurt lost this sale because of some big shot manager, he was going to be _so _pissed. He'd stayed after nearly an hour and a half for _this? _He went into the attached room, neatly stacking some sketches that were on his desk.

"We'll try somewhere else." Kurt heard the manager say, not caring that Kurt was clearly within earshot.

"This is what I want to wear." Blaine said. His voice was softer than Kurt thought it would be and he heard to strain to make out Blaine's words. His normal voice was even better than his singing voice, Kurt noted, and something in him wanted to hear Blaine talk all day.

"No. We'll just try Marc Jacobs."

Blaine said something that Kurt could make out and shortly after he heard a door slam.

"Fucking great." Kurt mumbled. It was ridiculous. The guy had looked _gorgeous _in every single thing Kurt had made and they bought none of it because of a _manager _who clearly had on a suit from Sears or something.

He looked up when there was a knock on the door frame, seeing Blaine Anderson there.

"Can I help you?" Kurt asked.

"I'll take all of them, thanks." He said kindly, eyes bright as he smiled.

"Oh." Kurt said, surprised. "Great! I'll take them up front for you."

"I can help." Blaine said, taking half of the clothes himself.

"That's quite some manager you've got there." Kurt remarked as they reached the front desk.

"Hmm." Blaine grunted. "He's quite the asshole, actually. He's always been."

"Someone with as famous as you surely has enough money to get a new one." Kurt said.

"Yes, but it's kind of hard to fire your dad." Blaine said, laying the clothes he was carrying over the counter when they reached it and then pulling out his wallet.

"Your _dad_?" Kurt asked, moving around the corner after hanging the clothes he was carrying on a rack nearby. "That is your _dad_?"

"Yep." Blaine pulled out his credit card. "Sorry about him again. You're…" he looked down, looking embarrassed. "You're actually really good. I used to look at your stuff in Vogue and InStyle when I actually had time to read magazines…"

Kurt's eyes widened in shock. "How long ago was that?"

"A little over a year and a half ago is when I stopped having time to read them, but I kind of followed your line for a while before then." Blaine admitted, looking back up. "I've tried to get an appointment ever since I could afford your clothes but you've been booked solid."

"Oh… wow. Thanks." Kurt felt any remaining anger caused by Blaine's father leave him. One of the most famous (and _gorgeous)_ celebrities now liked his stuff enough to _follow the line_? "If you ever need another outfit, I'll get them to make an exception."

Blaine smiled a bit, unaware that he was still holding his card. "This might be a bit forward of me but… It's late and I know I'm probably your last client of the day. Would you like to get a drink with me?"

"I don't think your girlfriend would like you going to a bar with a gay clothing designer, Blaine Anderson." Kurt said, just to hear him say it. He could tell, of course, that Blaine was gay. But it had never been publicly confirmed by Blaine himself. Besides, what if he was reading into things too much and Blaine wasn't looking at him like he was the most gorgeous thing he'd ever seen?

"Do you believe everything you read?" Blaine laughed. "I don't know how people think I could date her. She's a lot taller than me."

"I'm taller than you." Kurt pointed out, smiling. "Then again, you are on the short side."

"Yes, but you're also on the same team as me. Which puts you a lot higher on the dating chart than her."

"So Blaine Anderson _is _gay?" Kurt asked after glancing to make sure nobody else was around. After all, who was he to out Blaine, even accidentally, if he didn't want to be outted yet?

"Blaine Anderson is gay." Blaine nodded.

"And is he asking me out on a date?" Kurt asked, smiling still. Was this happening? Was this even real life?

"That depends on your answer." Blaine said, facial expression very serious.

"You realize that if you go out for a drink with a gay designer, people will talk?" Kurt asked.

"I don't have anything to hide." Blaine responded. "Besides, I think it might be worth it to get to know you on a first name basis."

Kurt held out his hand, smile growing even more. "Kurt."

Blaine grinned, placing his card down and shaking Kurt's hand. "Blaine… So, about that drink?"

"There's a quiet coffee shop down the street. It's a short walk if you're interested."

"Sounds excellent." Blaine said, reluctantly letting go of Kurt's soft hand. Oh, his dad was going to _kill him_ but it would be worth it.


	20. Wedding Day

**Klaine Week 2013: Wedding Day**

"You better not peek around this corner." David said, coming to a standing position.

"Are you both there?" Rachel Berry's voice asked from out of sight.

David peeked around the corner. "Hey, Kurt."

"Hey." Kurt said, voice higher than normal.

"We're leaving now." Rachel said, dropping Kurt's hand after giving it a tight squeeze.

"Don't. Peak!" David said, pulling the blindfold off Blaine and then eyeing him. "We'll be down there. One of you just signal us when you're ready."

Blaine watched David and Rachel walk away, chatting as they went.

"Blaine?" Kurt asked several seconds later.

"Hey." Blaine said, unable to see Kurt because he was just around the corner in the deserted hallway. There was no rule saying you couldn't _talk _to each other before the wedding. You just couldn't _see _each other. "How are you?"

"Nervous. Terrified. How are you?"

"The same." Blaine reached his hand over the corner, smiling when Kurt's fingers intertwined with his own. He gave Kurt's hand a tight squeeze, feeling rather proud of himself for coming up with the idea to talk to Kurt around a corner. "Did you go look outside? It looks beautiful, Kurt. You did such a good job."

"I did, didn't I?" Kurt asked cheekily.

Blaine laughed. "I love you so much."

"I love you too, Blaine. We're really getting married today." Kurt whispered.

"Let's sit down." Blaine dropped his hand and slid down the wall until he was seated on the floor, hearing Kurt slide down the wall as well. Seconds later, they were holding hands again.

"I can't believe I'm marrying you. When I first met you, you were so oblivious that I even liked you. I thought it was hopeless for a while here, you know?" Kurt let out a laugh. "I was half convinced you would end up with Thad."

Blaine laughed, loud and nervous and Blaine. "I wouldn't have ended up with Thad. Ever."

Kurt laughed again, feeling calmer than he had since the afternoon before when he'd seen Blaine last. That was how he knew, without a doubt, that they were making the right decision in marrying each other. Not that he'd had _doubts, _but the reassurance… It was nice. Especially with all of the stress that had come with planning such an extravagant wedding.

"You know that I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you after your prom… When did you know you wanted to spend the rest of your life with me?" Blaine asked.

"When you texted me 'Courage.'" Kurt answered without hesitation. He then added teasingly, "_B_."

Blaine smiled.

"Maybe it was wishful thinking but it worked out pretty well for us." Kurt smiled, looking down at their hands, watching Blaine's thumb stroke over his own.

"Pretty well?" Blaine asked, amused.

"You were right. We got each other out of everything that happened back in high school and I'm so _thankful _for that, Blaine."

"I know." Blaine whispered.

"All of these years, all the ups and downs, and we're here. In one hour and…" Kurt looked down at his watch. "Thirty-four minutes, we'll be standing at the altar getting _married_. We'll be husbands."

"Then we'll have to find the perfect house, raise perfect babies… then have grandbabies."

"Oh God. Don't talk about grandbabies." Kurt cringed.

"The more babies we have the more grandbabies to call you Gramps."

"Blaine…"

"Or Papaw."

"Blaine, I will hurt you…"

"Or _grandfather_."

Kurt reached over with his other hand, smacking Blaine upside the head.

Blaine let out a loud laugh, throwing his head back. "It's a good thing I didn't style my hair yet."

"I guess your wardrobe when you're not at work is preparation for when you're a grandpa." Kurt grinned.

"You love my cardigans. You buy me half of them." Blaine pointed out.

"I wish I could kiss you right now." Kurt whispered.

"I'll close my eyes? And you put on the blindfold?" Blaine asked, dropping Kurt's hand and sliding the blindfold to him.

Kurt put on the blindfold and reached his hand back around the corner. "How does this work?"

"Like this." Blaine moved around the corner, eyes closed. He leaned forward until his nose touched Kurt's. "I'm going to kiss you now. It's going to be our last kiss before we're husbands."

"Okay." Kurt said, voice soft.

Blaine pressed his lips to Kurt's soft ones, kissing slowly and passionately, trying to pour all of his excitement and happiness and anxiousness into that one kiss.

Kurt kissed back, moaning softly when Blaine pulled away.

"HEY NO LOOKING!" Rachel Berry ran up.

"Eyes closed!" Blaine retreated around the corner, holding his hands up in defense.

David came over. "Where's the blindfold?"

"I've got it." Kurt said, waving and passing it to David. He squeezed Blaine's hand one last time. "Let's get married, Blaine."

Blaine smiled, pretty sure he'd never worn a bigger smile in his life. "Let's get married."


	21. Blaine's Acceptance Letter

"I'm not going to be nothing." Blaine said to himself as he sat in the corner booth at a restaurant in downtown Westerville waiting for his parents and grandmother to meet him. It wasn't like he _wanted _to meet them or anything, but they knew it would be time for him to get his acceptance letters back from colleges and therefore they wanted to meet to 'discuss his options.' Which probably meant that his grandmother was forcing them to financially support him—something that he absolutely detested, but how else would he… well… survive? It wasn't like he could as Kurt's parents to support him or anything. He was pretty sure Kurt's dad didn't even _like _like him yet.

Blaine looked down at the three acceptance letters he had brought with him—Duke, UC Santa Barbara, and UCLA. Those were the three schools that wanted to recruit him for soccer and they would be giving him a scholarship if he accepted. He got into two more colleges—OSU and UK, but he didn't plan to tell his parents that. At least not yet.

The best three soccer schools wanted him. It was everything his father had wanted from him since he turned seven and started playing soccer. Wanted _from _was more accurate than _for_ because Blaine was pretty sure his dad just wanted in on the money he could possibly make if he went professional.

_I still wish you'd let me meet them. You've met Dad and Carole. How is that fair? :) _

Blaine looked down at the text and shook his head, smiling. Kurt knew things weren't… normal in Blaine's home life. They didn't go into a lot of details because Blaine wasn't comfortable enough to tell too much yet, but he knew that Kurt was really just trying to cheer him up. Kurt probably knew more than he let on. After all, he would always be stressed before and after visits. That always resulted in Kurt trying to cheer him up or distract him—something he appreciated more than Kurt would ever be able to understand. At least he had Kurt to complain to about it now.

**Maybe next time you can come. It'll be a party, **Blaine typed back. He knew Kurt would _never_ meet his dad but he wasn't going to come out and say that. Kurt would surely take it the wrong way.

_I don't think we have the same idea of what a party is, Blaine. But if it ends in more drunk cuddling, I might not argue too much._

"It is incredibly rude to have your phone out on the table in a restaurant, Blaine. What do they teach you at Dalton?"

Blaine slid his phone into his pocket as his grandmother took a seat across from him. "Sorry, grandmother."

"Your parents will be here shortly. Your father got a little held up at work." She said, looking around the restaurant. "Did they not even bring you water?"

"I didn't want anything to drink until I ordered." Blaine mumbled.

"Talk clearly. You're not some public school child."

"I went to public school until ninth grade."

"Don't back talk me. What has gotten into you? A boy gets to the age where he can apply to college and all of a sudden he thinks he can sass his grandmother?"

"Surely Blaine isn't sassing anybody."

Blaine stiffened as his father sat directly across from him. He'd really hoped his mother would sit by him… until he remembered otherwise he'd be looking directly at his father.

"How's that boy?" His mother asked, sliding into the booth next to him and pulling a hair off of his blazer. "Doesn't he look so adorable in his blazer, Barbra?"

Blaine shrugged his shoulder in an attempt to make her stop. "It's fine, mom."

"Clearly your etiquette classes did not pay off." His grandmother remarked as the waiter came up and took their order.

"A lot of things didn't." His father muttered, looking Blaine in the eyes.

"How is that boy?" His mother repeated and Blaine resisted the urge to cringe.

"What boy?" Blaine asked distractedly, looking around the restaurant confused.

"I heard him on the other side of the phone the other day, Blaine. Don't treat me like I'm dumb. You have a friend that is a boy." His mother said slowly.

"I have many friends that are boys." Blaine said. "I go to an all boys school."

"Honestly. We can handle it. We handled you coming out, didn't we?" Blaine's grandmother asked.

_Oh, yeah. You sure did._

"What's his name?"

Blaine looked out the window, praying that the waiter would come with their drinks a little faster. He needed something to distract himself since he clearly wasn't going to be able to have his phone out. His phone was the only thing that made lunches with his mother bearable and now he didn't even have _that _to save him.

"Your mother asked you a question, Blaine." His father said, voice low.

"Christopher." Blaine lied. "His name is Christopher."

"I've always thought that was a hideous name." Blaine's mother said, scrunching her nose up. "_Christopher_?"

"What ethnicity is he?" His grandmother asked.

"Does it matter?" Blaine asked before he could stop himself.

"Of course it matters." His father said through clenched teeth.

"He's Hispanic. Christopher is his middle name. His first name is Jose."

His grandmother dropped her purse on the floor. "Honestly, Blaine?"

Blaine shrugged one shoulder, looking up and taking his drink from the waiter when she arrived.

"I still say we should have gone to the country club." Blaine's mother sighed.

"It would have been too far of a drive for Blaine. Gas isn't cheap these days and I'm the one that has to pay his gas because Dalton won't let their damn students have jobs." Blaine's father scoffed. "If I had it my way, he'd be working and paying off part of his tuition bill."

_There goes them paying for tuition for OSU or UK, _Blaine thought to himself. He felt a tingle of sadness and guilt. _There goes being within driving distance of Kurt._

"Are you really dating a Mexican?" His grandmother asked.

"I think they prefer to be called _Hispanic_, mother."

"I'm actually dating a leprechaun." Blaine shrugged.

"I'm asking you a serious question." His father growled.

"I'm not dating anybody." Blaine blurted, sitting up much straighter. "The guy on the phone was one of the Warblers."

He momentarily closed his eyes. _Please don't ask me anything else…_

"You sure do talk to someone on the phone a lot after school. Who is it?"

"My therapist."

All three of them fell silent after that, not speaking until several minutes after their food arrived. They'd _never _asked how therapy was going. Not in public to avoid being overheard and not in private because they didn't care.

"So," His grandmother finally said. "When are you going to let us in on the big news?"

_Now if it'll get me out of here, _Blaine thought. But he didn't say that. Instead¸ he said, "Whenever."

"Now we just want you to know that everything will be covered. I will cover food, gas, and school expenses while you're up there and your parents will pay for a _nice _apartment and will completely furnish it and pay for all of your bills." His grandmother prattled. "If no scholarship is involved, your parents have agreed to pay that as well."

"If?" Blaine prompted. It wasn't going to be that easy. No way. It wasn't how his family worked.

"_If_ you keep your private life private." His father cut in. "I don't want a bunch of pictures of you shacking up with boys ending up in the wrong hands. Your grandmother and I have careers to keep up and if you go wild, we're going to cut you off entirely."

"So can I act gay or can I just not let you find out?" Blaine asked, voice sweet.

_Why did I just say that?_

He really was back talking too much. Clearly Kurt was rubbing off on him.

"Are you wanting an argument or are you just stupid?" His father asked, glaring at him.

Blaine pushed the envelope toward his father, mainly just to shut him up.

His dad set his plate aside and opened Duke's first—his father's first choice, as it had been since he was 9 and his coach said he showed "great promise."

"Accepted." His father said out loud about five seconds later.

Blaine sat very still, waiting. What would happen?

"Accepted on a full scholarship!" His grandmother cried, looking over her son's shoulder. "Oh, Blaine! I knew you could do it! He's always practiced so hard!"

Blaine's eyebrow shot up. He hadn't expected a reaction from her. The again, money. What else would get a reaction from this woman?

"Do you see that, Mark?"

"Good. Maybe he can go to Duke, get his act together, find a nice girl, have a good career, and pretend to be normal." His father said, tossing the letter onto the table.

Blaine stood, yanking the letter up and grabbing the others as well before anyone could grab them. "I don't know why I came."

"Not so fast. We're not done discussing this. You need financial support." His grandmother said, pointing to the seat. "Sit."

Blaine stared at the three of them, weighing his options. Money for college and life or no money for college and life. Of course, _of course, _freaking money was going to win out. He hated money.

"Financial support will be given to you, as I explained, but there are some… conditions. Now I know that you wouldn't want to do anything to jeopardize my chances of winning in office." His grandmother said as he slowly and regretfully took a seat. "We want to make sure proper precautions are taken to… to ensure my slot."

Blaine resisted the urge to take a roll his eyes.

"You are not to post pictures of you and other boys acting… homosexual online." His father interrupted. "You are not to post anything about your boyfriend online. You are not to do anything that would raise flags that the grandson of Barbra Anderson is gay. Am I clear?"

Blaine looked down at his phone, uploading a picture of he and Kurt as his Facebook display picture. His profile was completely unsearchable so it wasn't that big of a deal, but it still gave him the lightest bit of satisfaction. "Crystal clear, _father._ Is that it?"

"Don't go getting drunk and acting like a fool. You have a name to uphold. If you get arrested, I will _not _be bailing you out again."

"The longer I'm in jail, the more likely people are to make a connection." Blaine commented. "That would be pretty unfortunate, wouldn't it?"

His father stood, walked around the table, and grabbed his arm roughly. "I'm not playing, Blaine Wyatt Anderson. Just because you are almost 18 does not give you the right to act how you choose."

"Actually when I'm 18, it _does _give me the right. By law." Blaine said, eyes on his father's hand. _Five… four… three…_

"Let go of him, Mark. This is ridiculous." His grandmother hissed. "Someone could see."

"Someone could see? That's more important than what he did?" Blaine scoffed, standing when his father let go of him. "I'm leaving."

"Here's some lunch money, dear." His mother said, shoving four one hundred dollar bills into his hand.

"Lunch money or hush money? Forget it." Blaine pocketed the money, grabbed his jacket, and stormed out of the restaurant.

_Are you free yet?_

Blaine looked at his text, feeling his face light up in a smile at Kurt's words. **Just broke away. Am I driving to Lima or are we meeting half way?**

_You've driven all the way the last five times. I'm at Dalton in the senior commons with your friends. Hurry back. Wes is getting restless and that always results in awkward sexuality questions._

**I am so sorry. I'll be ten minutes tops.**

_:)_

At least Blaine had Kurt and his friends.


	22. Babies Warning: Gap Attack

**_Baby drabble, you have been warned!_**

"I'm sorry, kiddos, but no embarrassing story you tell me can _ever _top the Gap Attack." Kurt said late one night, in the kitchen and putting cookie dough on a baking sheet.

"The _Gap Attack_?" Sophie questioned, raising her eyebrow. The kids were all seated on one side of the counter while Kurt was using the other side for baking space.

They heard a bang from the living room and then a, "KURT, DON'T YOU DARE!"

"This is gonna be good." Nick sat up straight, eagerly looking at Kurt as Blaine stumbled into the room. "Go on."

Kurt smirked, blue eyes twinkling. "I don't know. Maybe Blaine can tell it better."

All three kids turned their attention to their other father.

"_No_." Blaine pointed at Kurt. "Unless you want a divorce."

"Don't be so dramatic." Kurt rolled his eyes. "Before Dad and I started dating, Blaine had a crush on a hipster named… what was his name?"

Blaine scowled, crossing his arms over his chest and evidently regressing about twenty years. "I don't remember."

"He's lying." Kurt laughed. "I know he remembers."

"Don't do this." Blaine whined, sitting at the counter with his three kids.

Kurt shook his head, continuing his story. "Anyway, he basically told me he had feelings for _someone _and he asked me if it would be too much to sing to them. I thought he was talking about _me _because at this point we had spent all of our free time together and I was already head over heels in love with him_, _so I said yes… Again, thinking he would be singing to me."

Blaine covered his face with both hands.

"This is going to be better than I thought. I can feel it." Nick whispered in Zach's ear, but it was still loud enough that they could all hear. Zach grinned and nodded.

"_So then _he's all 'Let's sing at the Gap because that's where _Jeremiah _is and if we get married I'll get a 50 percent discount' at the next Warbler meeting." Kurt scoffed. "Never mind that _now_ I have connections to get him whatever clothes he wants in the world, but that doesn't matter."

"I never said that if we got married, he'd get me a 50% discount." Blaine scoffed as Nick and Zach bent over laughing.

"You so did. That _sounds _like you, daddy." Sophie giggled.

"Wa-Wait." Zach sat up straight, trying to not laugh. "So you thought that he was going to sing to _you _and then you had to sing to _that guy_?"

Blaine groaned, laying his head on the counter. Why had he come home from work?

"That is so wrong, dad." Nick shook his head. "You ought to be ashamed. Leading our father on like that and then breaking his heart."

Kurt waved his hand. "No. See, Blaine has this trait that makes him completely oblivious to everything around him until you literally spell it out for him."

"Can you end it here?" Blaine raised his head. "Please?"

"No. Somebody ask me what Blaine had all of us sing to Jeremiah." Kurt said, patting Blaine's head.

"The Strawberry Shortcake song?" Zach snickered.

"Cute, but no." Kurt shook his head, cookie dough forgotten as he leaned on the counter on the other side and talked to them. "He has us sing When I Get You Alone. He had all of us sing it in the middle of a crowded Gap that was in the middle of a crowded mall."

"Isn't that the song that says the person won't need sex toys?" Zach tilted his head.

"NO! I know that our father did not serenade a guy with a song that includes_sex toys_." Nick threw his hand on the counter. "There is no way."

"I think what's worse is he made our _other _father help!" Sophie stared at the back of Blaine's head. "Nick is right. You ought to be ashamed, Daddy."

"Believe me. I don't need your opinion. I can never be more humiliated than I was when it happened." Blaine groaned.

"And I thought I was horrible for taking that one vegan girl I dated to a steak house." Nick snorted loudly.

"Which one was that?" Kurt asked curiously. "I don't remember that."

"You probably don't remember because I didn't tell anyone. The date never actually happened. Because I… took her to a steakhouse." Nick grinned sheepishly.

"Oh my God." Blaine rolled his eyes. "Nicholas, that's horrible."

"I forgot! I'm sorry! Girls are so difficult. They expect you to listen to_everything_." Nick groaned.

"They say a lot, too." Zach added. "It's a little exhausting."

"You know, I'm pretty sure that is worse than the Gap Attack. At least Blaine didn't know I liked him. You just completely disregarded something the poor girl said… And that's a pretty big thing!" Kurt said thoughtfully. "At least Blaine listens to me."

"I do listen to you." Blaine leaned over the counter, quickly kissing Kurt. "Because I am a good person, unlike my son."

Nick held his hands up in the air. "At least I haven't only ever had one girlfriend. You two don't even know what else is out there. I'm keeping my options open."

"I don't need to know what else is out there." Kurt said, causing Blaine to get the most ridiculous smile on his face. "I have all that I could want."

"You two are gross. I bet your life was more exciting when Dad was singing about sex toys to hipsters." Nick snorted again and stood up. He then walked towards the living room, beginning to sing. "_Because you walk pretty, because you talk pretty, 'cause you make me sick, and I'm not leavin', tell you're leavin'!"_

"That's it!" Zach exclaimed. "That _is _the song!"

"How do you two even _know _that?" Blaine asked, arching his eyebrow.

"It was on a TV show called 'Embarrassing Shows Your Super Old Parents Used To Embarrass Themselves.'" Sophie smiled sweetly.

"You're supposed to be on my side." Blaine said, looking wounded.

"You made Daddy sing When I Get You Alone to a guy that you liked when Daddy liked you? I'm going to have to take Daddy's side on this one." Sophie said. "Sorry. Maybe next time."

"You should be ashamed, old man." Zach added, standing up. "Daddy, is that why you're always embarrassed to go into the Gap?"

"No. That's another story… But it's X rated, so you won't be hearing that one." Blaine smirked. Two could play the embarrassing game.

Kurt, who had begun to move a the leftover cookie dough, dropped the bowl and jumped back as it shattered. "_Blaine_!"

"Oh my God, are you okay?" Blaine rushed over.

"You're such an asshole!" Kurt exclaimed, halfheartedly hitting him on the shoulder before grabbing a towel and beginning to clean up the mess. "I guess we're ordering pizza tonight."

"We're ordering pizza... because you dumped cookie dough?" Sophie asked.

"Don't question the way your parents do things, Soph." Blaine looked at her as he carried a pile of glass to the trash can.

"So…" Zach asked, going to help. "How drunk would Dad theoretically have to be before he let us know what happened in the Gap?"

"Not happening." Kurt and Blaine said together.

"Fine, you perverts."


	23. Skinny Jeans

"Oh, _Blainerssss_!" Wes sang, bounding into the dorm room that Blaine and David shared. "Your lover boy just got back from _Liiiiima_."

"By lover boy do you mean Kurt? I already told you that we aren't dating, Wes. We're _just friends_." Blaine said, just as he said every time Kurt's name—or, rather, Lover Boy—came up in conversation.

"Just friends. Right." David snorted from his bed where he was looking through a Science magazine. "This 'mentor' thing will get creepy if you keep it up much longer. Just admit that you have feelings for him and ask him out. It's the talk of all of the Warblers you know. Everyone's all for it."

"Except Thad." Wes commented.

"Yes well Thad is clearly in love with Blaine so he doesn't count. It's almost sad." David sighed. "By the way, Blaine, you aren't allowed to date Thad. Ever. I don't care how desperate you are, alright? If you ever even mention the possibility, I'm throwing out all of that hair gel."

"Thad isn't gay. And as far as Kurt goes, while there may have been some attraction when I first met him, there isn't anymore. He needs a friend, someone to talk to. Not someone to make out in the abandoned common rooms after dinner… not that I've put thought into it or anything—_what is—oh my God_." Blaine said, eyes widening as he looked out the door. He could see all the way down the hallway and what he saw was Kurt Hummel.

Kurt Hummel in very tight skinny jeans that clung to his legs and thighs in ways that left just enough to the imagination, and his crotch…

_I did not just look at his… No amount of church could stop me from going to hell with all the things running through my mind and…_

"What was that about making out after dinner?" David grinned.

"He's wearing those pants for somebody, Blaine, and you're the only gay guy he knows at school so far." Wes grinned also, exchanging looks with David. "So I'm going to go out on a limb here and say they're for _you_."

"Then again, since you're _just friends_, I'm sure you're paying as little attention to his pants as we are." David shrugged. "It's nothing to get _excited _about."

"I. Hate. You. Both." Blaine said. "Shut the door!"

"And deprive you of that lovely view? What kind of best friends would we be?" Wes asked sweetly. "Besides, you know he'll stop by here. Every time he comes back to Dalton he stops in to say hello. We wouldn't want to be rude. After all, you said we needed to be extra welcoming."

"_Au contraire_," David said. "I know I said it was nothing to get excited about, but you sure seem to be excited, Blaine."

Blaine glanced down, going pale. Why had he stared for so long? Was he a pervert? Surely he wasn't a pervert, right? And yep, he had a problem. A big one.

"Hey, Kurt!" Wes called loudly, poking his head out. "Nice first weekend home?"

Blaine's eyes widened in horror and he stumbled to the bathroom, slamming the door shut. The only thing that made him feel better about what he was going to be doing in mere seconds was that he heard the bedroom door closing, signaling that at least Wes and David were going to give him privacy.

…

"There Blaine is." David grinned as Blaine came into the common room nearest their room, smoothing out a wrinkle in his Dalton soccer hoodie. Wearing it had absolutely nothing to do with the fact that it was big on him and if he got another… problem… that it would buy him time to safely get away. Nothing at all.

Wes immediately began to snicker, clearly knowing the exact reasoning behind his addition to his outfit. "Hey, Blainey Boo Bear."

"Hello, Wesley." Blaine said, half glaring at him before smiling at Kurt. "Hi, Kurt. Did you have a good weekend?"

"Yeah. It was nice to be home. Luckily Carole's been able to keep Dad on his diet and…"

_Can he tell I just jerked off because of him?_

_There's no way he could tell._

_Right?_

_No, he can't tell._

_He's looking at me odd. _

_What if he can tell?!_

"You okay?" Kurt asked, head tilting a bit. "You look kind of flustered."

David began snickering too, but at least he had the brain to look at his phone while doing so which could have disguised the truth behind his laughter.

"He's great." Wes giggled. "He's really excited to see you."

David elbowed him, trying to hold in his laughter. "So… So… So, Kurt… Lima, huh?"

"Yes. That's where I'm from." Kurt said slowly. "Is it really that funny?"

"Yeah guys." Blaine glared. "Is it really that funny?"

"No, no." David shook his hand.

"Maybe you two should go get coffee. The Lima Bean. Get away from us." Wes suggested. "It's kind of too small of a room for so much gay."

"_Wes_!" Blaine hissed. "Ignore him, Kurt."

"Yeah, ignore me. You two should go somewhere where I'm not. Where nobody is. You know, be gay together." Wes nodded. "Both of you. Alone."

"If I didn't know how delusional you can be on a daily basis, I'd be offended." Kurt said smoothly. "But surprisingly, it doesn't even faze me anymore. I guess I'm getting used to it."

Blaine shot Wes a look, although he felt relieved. At least Kurt knew them enough to not be bothered by them.

_Kurt knows your friends well enough to handle their craziness. Let's revel in this for a minute, okay, Blaine? Because no other guy will ever be able to do this._

_Mentor! Mentor!_

"Maybe we should take his advice at any rate. Have you had lunch yet?" Blaine asked, shaking his thoughts away. He thought way too much, especially when Kurt Hummel was involved.

"No. I just got back." Kurt said and then added, almost shyly, "Have you?"

"Nope and I'm starving." Blaine grinned.

"Aren't you always?" Kurt asked, smiling in a way that made Blaine want to—

_Mentor_.

Right.

"You sound like David's mom." Blaine laughed, touching Kurt's elbow briefly and then walking towards the hall. "Coming?"

"Blaine'll buy!" David called.

"Yeah, it'll be like a date!" Wes yelled too.

"That's not necessary." Kurt mumbled and blushed, looking away from Blaine quickly.

How had Blaine gone from jerking off over this boy's jeans to thinking he was the most adorable thing on the planet? More importantly, how had he found someone that could be so sexy and adorable at the same time?

And how was Blaine going to handle not getting… erm… excited again while eating lunch?

And _most _importantly, where was Blaine going to find new friends? Because Wes and David were beyond fired.


	24. Toddler Blaine Goes Grocery Shopping

"I want dat one!"

"Alright."

"And dat one, Alex!"

"Okay."

"Dat onnnnne!" Blaine whined, grabbing at Alex's arm. "Not da blue one!"

"Which one? The green one?"

"Uh huh." Blaine nodded and stuck his thumb in his mouth, kicking his legs back and forth. "Hello!" he squealed at a young girl walking by, who laughed and waved at him. Blaine sat up a little straighter and grinned.

"Alright, you little flirt." Alex laughed, ruffling Blaine's dark curls. "Are you ready to check out?"

"I wants a toy, Alex! Toy, toy, toy! Tooooy!" Blaine pulled his legs through the basket and attempted to stand.

"Okay, okay, if you stop trying to stand, I'll get you a toy." Alex promised. "Sit on your butt."

"Dats a funny word. Butt butt butt." Blaine said, rocking side to side. "Can I gets a toy?"

"Most kids my age could use a younger brother your age to get girls. You, however, would scare them away." Alex teased.

"Daddy says that I'm gon' be a lady killer. But I don't wanna kill ladies." Blaine said very seriously. "I don't even like ladies. Only momma. But I don't wanna kill her either."

"Well I think momma likes you too." Alex said, ruffling Blaine's hair again. "Wanna know a secret?"

"No." Blaine chirped, standing and turning in his seat. "It's a booooooy! I like boys! Can he be my friend?"

"Maybe he can be your friend next time." Alex turned Blaine around. "On your butt or you don't get a toy."

"Dats a funny word. Butt butt butt." Blaine said again as he plopped down. "What's a see-cret, Alex?"

"Something you can't tell _anybody _else." Alex said very seriously. "I'm going to Italy."

"Can I go?" Blaine giggled.

"I don't think momma would like that so much. And wouldn't you miss momma?"

"I would miss momma. I love momma." Blaine nodded. "I would be very sad without my momma."

"Momma loves you too, kiddo."

"When you going to come back?" Blaine tilted his head.

"I dunno, Blaine." Alex said. "Maybe for Christmas."

"Can I go then? I'll miss you." Blaine leaned forward, nuzzling Alex's arm.

"I think you need to stay with momma and daddy." Alex repeated. "But I'll miss you too, little man. Which toy do you want?"

"That one!" Blaine said, pointing at a pink power ranger.

"What about the blue or red one?" Alex asked. "Did you see them?"

"I like pink." Blaine said slowly. "I wants the pink one."

"Alright." Alex blinked, watching Blaine very closely, before grabbing it. "But maybe let's get a red one too and you can hide the pink one from Daddy, alright?"

Blaine hugged the pink power ranger. "Thank you! I love you!"

"I love you too and you're very welcome." Alex said, turning and heading to the checkout lane.

"Hiiii!" Blaine said, waving at a woman in front of them.

"Hi there, cutie pie!" The woman smiled and waved back.

"Hiiii!" Blaine giggled to the cashier who still managed to wave while ringing up the woman.

"Shh, Blaine." Alex laughed.

"Grandma says I has to be friendly with people so they'll like me." Blaine said cheerfully, waving energetically at a large man who just blinked at him and looked away. Blaine's jaw dropped and he looked at Alex, mortified.

"It's okay." Alex said, ruffling his dark curls. "Just play with your power rangers."

"The red one is stupid. Pink is my favorite." Blaine scowled. "Hey, mister! Mister, you're a meanieface!"

"Oh my God." Alex said, feeling the color from his face drain. "Blaine, are you trying to get us killed?"

"Listen to me!" Blaine whined, kicking his legs. "You are very rude! My Daddy says you have to listen to people when they talk and does what they say! You isn't listening!"

The man stared ahead, completely ignoring little Blaine.

"You're an asshole!"

Every adult within hearing distance, including the large man, looked at Alex.

"What did your little brat call me?" The man asked.

"An asshole." Blaine said in a sweet voice, clearly thrilled that the man was talking to him. "How are you today?"

"Blaine, please, just stop talking." Alex hissed.

The man glared at Blaine. "Watch your mouth, kid."

"I did wash my teeth this morning and last night. With a toothbrush. 'Cause it's proper and little boys are proper." Blaine said.

"Do little boys also have pink dolls?" The man asked.

"You're a very mean and fat old man. I'm gonna tell my Daddy." Blaine said, crossing his arms over his chest. "I just wanted to say hello but you're a buttface."

"Blaine, stop it now." Alex said. "Right now."

"You coulda just said hello. It's not dat hard." Blaine continued. "Even a parrot can do it! And they aren't even supposed to talk!"

"You better shut your brat up." The man said angrily.

"You better shut your stupid celery up." Blaine said. "It's dumb and green and green is a stupid color. Like your face! Pink is better and the best."

"Alright, Blaine, if you stop talking right now we'll get ice cream." Alex pleaded. "Does that sound good? Ice cream?"

"And gummy worms?" Blaine asked, thinking it over.

"All the fucking gummy worms in the world if you'll just shut your mouth."

Blaine snapped his mouth shut, but not before sticking his tongue out at the man and triumphantly waving his pink power ranger doll. Shopping with his big brother Alex was always fun.


	25. Kurt Gets Pulled Over

"Oh, I have _got _to see this." Blaine said glancing into the car side mirror on his side.

"Don't judge me by what you're about to see." Kurt said taking a deep breath as he pulled to the side of the road.

"You're going to get a ticket. I told you they monitor this area." Blaine sang.

"I have never gotten a ticket in my life and I don't plan to start today." Kurt said, cursing under his breath and lowering his window.

"You were going twenty-five over." Blaine whispered as the police officer behind them got out of his cruiser. Kurt had told him stories of the four earlier times he'd talked himself out of ticket but no way. Not this time. The area was strict on speed and known for giving tickets. Not even Kurt Hummel could worm his way out of this one.

"As I said, don't judge me." Kurt repeated, taking another deep breath and making his eyes wider than normal.

"There's no way you can talk your way out of this." Blaine fell quiet as the police officer reached the Navigator. The least he could do was be quiet and let Kurt try his best.

"Sir, are you aware of how fast you were going?" The officer, a middle-aged woman with dark hair, asked.

Kurt looked up, big tears in his eyes. "I have to get home. M-My dad is sick and the nurse has to leave in half an hour and I live forty-five minutes away."

"Car registration and proof of insurance, please?" The woman asked, seemingly not paying any attention to his waterworks. It was almost sad he was going to get a ticket—considering he'd gone through all the trouble of making himself cry and everything.

"O-Okay." Kurt sniffled and reached over Blaine, grabbing the items and handing them over while wiping his eyes.

"Twenty six miles over the speed limit is _not _okay. It is very dangerous. No matter how sick your father is, I'm sure he wouldn't want you to lose control of the car. Road safety comes _first_." The officer said sternly.

"Yes ma'am." Kurt said, nodding and wiping fake tears from his eyes. "I'm r-really sorry."

"I can't tell you how many kids get into wrecks and die speeding." The woman continued as she looked over Kurt's papers.

"I'm really sorry again." Kurt looked gown guiltily.

Blaine bit his lip to keep from laughing. There was no way this would work, no matter how adorable he looked with those big eyes. No way. Still, Blaine had to admit that his friend was pretty adorable… No. Friends weren't adorable. Not adorable.

"There, there. It's okay. I'll let it slide this time." The woman said kindly.

Blaine was pretty sure his eyes were going to pop out of his head. That? That was all Kurt had to do to get out of a ticket? Teary eyes, sniffling, and apologies? In one of the strictest ticketing towns in Ohio? No way.

"As long as this checks out, you'll be on your way in two minutes." She continued.

"T-Thank you." Kurt wiped his teary eyes again as the woman walked away. He then looked at Blaine and said very cheerfully, "Told you I was going to get out of it, Blaine Anderson."

"I was so sure it wasn't working! How did you do that?!" Blaine glanced in his mirror and shook his head. "You just lied yourself out of a ticket. How did you—and you're legit crying—oh my God. That is horrible, Kurt."

"I told you to not judge me." Kurt repeated, giving Blaine a sheepish—and not adorable at all—smile. "We aren't all adorable like you. I bet you could smile your way out of a ticket."

"Oh, I don't know about _that_." Blaine said, shrugging.

"Alright, sweetheart, you're good to go. But I want you to go the speed limit for the rest of the way home. If it's that important, the nurse can wait." The police officer said, coming up and handing Kurt his license, insurance card, and registration.

"I will." Kurt said, sniffling. "Thank you very much."

"That is so not fair." Blaine said as the police officer got into her cruiser and sped away.

"We can't all be Kurt Hummel, Blaine." Kurt said, sending Blaine an impish smile. "Now what exit am I getting off at again?"


	26. Babies Warning: Light Snack

_**BABY DRABBLE YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!**_

"Nick, is that you? Can you go and grab me my tablet? The gray one, not the black one. It's in the safe. The combination is 36-06-00." Kurt said without looking up.

Nick moved around some but didn't speak.

"Time is of the essence here, Nicky." Kurt still didn't look up.

Still, Nick didn't move.

"Nick, really, what are you waiting fo-." Kurt looked up, trailing off when he saw his oldest child with a _light bulb _in his _mouth_. "What... is that light bulb doing… in your mouth?"

Nick grinned around the light bulb and pulled it out with a pop. "I'm having a _light _snack."

Kurt stared at him, not even blinking.

"Get it? _Light _snack. " Nick's grin grew. "'Cause it's a _light _bulb. You can laugh."

"I'm not going to laugh at that." Kurt scoffed.

"You know you want to." Nick put the light bulb back in his mouth and quirked an eyebrow up.

Kurt bit his lip hard before bursting into laughter. "Go get the tablet!"

"Nobody can make you laugh like I dooooo." Nick sang before leaving the office.

"Who thought it was a bright idea to let Blaine procreate?" Kurt asked himself out loud, staring at the door. He rolled his eyes when Blaine walked in with a light bulb in his mouth.

"Too late, daddy-o!" Nick grinned, coming back in with Kurt's tablet. "Beat ya to the punch!"

"Damn it! I'm the one who even told you about that!" Blaine whined, tossing the light bulb into the trash can near Kurt's desk.

"Father, dearest, why so upset?" Nick asked, a mock solemn look on his face. "I'm sorry that in your old age you just don't have what it takes to be funny and original anymore."

"Old age?" Blaine scoffed. "I'm forty-three."

"Exactly. Old age."

"43 is pretty old." Kurt teased.

"You'll be there in two weeks." Nick pointed out.

"No driving practice tonight!" Blaine pointed at Nick. "Ha!"

"What? Why?" Nick asked, looking highly offended.

"Sixteen is pretty young to drive." Blaine teasingly sneered at him. "Call me in a year or two when you lose your funny and original bone."

"At least I'll still have had it longer than you. Ohhh, burn!" Nick punched Blaine's arm on his way out of the room.

"I thought we agreed we were taking the Easy A movie from him."

"I did. He keeps ordering it off of Amazon. I didn't even know that was still a working website." Blaine shrugged and then scowled. "That was _my _joke to tell, Kurt. _Mine_."

"Yes well I'm sure you'll find a way to move on, honey." Kurt rolled his eyes. "Now I don't want to injure you feelings any farther but I really do need to get this drawn so I can have it out by tomorrow. Okay?"

"Pfft." Blaine bent, kissed his forehead, and left the office gently closing the door behind him.

"Maybe if you weren't so old, you could have beat me to it." Nick said, jumping out from the other side of the hallway.

"Nicholas Graysen!" Blaine snapped. "I am not old and you're—you're—."

"Obnoxious? Annoying?" Nick questioned. "I prefer the term _hilarious_ but that's just me."

"I am so mad at you."

"For a man your age, that's _really _immature. Is that the kind of example you want to set for your children? Think of young Zachary and Sophia."

"I'm _four minutes _younger than you." Zach snapped from his bedroom.

"Such a negative influence, father." Nick shook his head as if disappointed, ignoring his twin.

"How long before you go off to college again?"

"How long before I put you in a nursing home again?"

"If both of you don't shut up and let me get work done, we won't have money for a college education _or _a nursing home." Kurt poked his head out of the office door.

"We're multi-millionaires, Kurt." Blaine pointed out.

"Oh, technicalities." Kurt closed the office door, muttering to himself, "I thought Blaine was bad enough bickering with me but he and Nick are just downright annoying."

"I heard that!" Nick and Blaine called together. Blaine then added, "And you're still not driving tonight."

"But _dad_. That's not fair."

"Sorry. Can't hear you. I guess I'm so old my hearing is going."

"Hmph!"

* * *

**In case anyone happens to recognize this, it was inspired by a Tumblr post! I saw the post, it reminded me of Nick and I stated so, it was prompted... and here we are!**


	27. AU WBUCT Scene: Blaine Proposes

**This is NOT how the proposal will go in Long Time Coming! Someone prompted a _alternate _one. (Plus, the real one is twenty times better and well worth the wait in my biased opinion! :] )**

* * *

_You can do this. You've got this, Blaine. It's been planned out for months. You've had the okay from Burt._

_Oh, God. Oh, God. Oh, God._

Blaine fumbled to separate the ornaments that were stuck together by their hooks as Kurt chattered away to his aunts in the corner of the room, completely oblivious to the fact that Blaine was _freaking the fuck out_.

"I'll be back." Blaine said, standing and making his way to the kitchen feeling like his legs had been replaced with Jello. He had always thought guys were chumps for talking about how they'd been nervous to propose. If they were so nervous, how did they know they were making the right decision? They shouldn't have been so nervous if they knew she was "the one."

But now Blaine understood.

What if Kurt said no? What if Kurt hated the ring? What if Kurt's grandparents didn't approve? What if Kurt didn't really want to spend the rest of his life with him? What if, what if…

He felt a hand on his shoulder and a kiss to his cheek.

"You have been jittery all day, Blaine Anderson." Kurt whispered from behind. "I told you to quit worrying about work stuff."

As if anything work related could make Blaine feel this sick to his stomach.

"Sorry." He whispered back, leaning against Kurt.

"You know we're hardly ever in Ohio. Don't spend it worrying about New York stuff, alright? We'll get everything worked out after New Year's." Kurt promised him, giving him a tight squeeze. He then kissed Blaine's cheek again. "I love you."

"I love you too." Blaine turned and smiled at him adorably, checking his pocket when Kurt walked out of the kitchen. It was still there. He had to man up and just _do it_.

…

"No, no, no. Put that one higher up… by the… no, sweetheart, next to…"

"Next to what, Grammy?" Kurt laughed.

"The angel with the red—yes, perfect!" Kurt's grandmother said. "Now put this one up."

"It's gonna get cluttered real soon." Burt said from the couch.

"THIS ONE, KURT! THIS ONE!" Melody squealed, jumping up and down. "THE KITTY ONE!"

"Okay, okay, okay." Kurt leaned down, taking both ornaments.

"Next to Nemo, Kurt. Next to Nemo."

"We can't have the cat by Nemo, Melody. It'll try to eat him." Kurt teased.

"It's just an ornament, Kurt." Melody protested. "They're not _real_."

"If you say so." Kurt tsked, placing the adorable cat ornament next to Melody's Nemo ornament.

Blaine slid the ring out of his pocket when he was positive Kurt wasn't looking. He saw Burt nudging Carole out of the corner of his eye and her hand flew to her mouth.

"That one looks good there, Kurtsie." Taylor called after he put a snowflake ornament somewhere—Blaine didn't know _where_. He was a little preoccupied trying to wrap a hook around the ring with shaking fingers.

_This is it, this is it…_

"Now put the dancer closer to the top so there's less of a chance of her falling." Kurt's grandmother was saying.

Kurt leaned down without looking, taking the hook from Blaine.

"There isn't a—_oh my God_." Kurt gasped, his blue eyes widening. "Oh my God."

"What is it, mommy?" Melody asked. "Why are you crying? What did I miss?"

Burt grabbed Melody, putting his hand over her mouth and then leaning down to whisper something in her ear.

"_Holy shit is that—."_

"_Taylor, shut up!"_

"Honestly, could everyone be quiet so the boy could talk?" Kurt's grandfather snapped.

"Kurt…" Blaine began, getting on one knee.

"Oh my _God_." Tears filled Kurt's eyes and he covered his mouth. "Blaine…"

"Kurt… you are everything to me. You're my best friend, you're my lover, and you're my family." Blaine took a deep breath. "I'm a completely different person than I was when we met. I'm a better person now and it's because I want to be better for you because I want to give you every…"

Blaine took another deep breath, feeling tears prickling in _his _eyes. He wasn't the one that was supposed to be crying now. "Because I want to give you everything."

"You already do." Kurt sniffled, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand. "You already do, Blaine."

"I want to give you more. I want to be with you _forever_. I want to build a house with you, I want to raise babies with you in that house, I want to be with you _forever_."

"Babies are smelly." Melody whispered loudly.

"Melody!" Carole hissed as Burt clapped a hand over her mouth again.

"I already love you _so much_, Kurt. I have fallen more in love with you every day that I've known you and I promise that I will continue to love you more and more each day. I know we still have a whole life ahead of us but… but I know I want to spend it with you… That's the only thing I'm really sure of in my life."

"Oh my God, oh my God." Kurt said as Blaine gently took the ring off of the hook that Kurt was still holding on to. More tears filled his eyes as Blaine took his left hand. "Oh my God, Blaine. Oh my God."

"Kurt, will you marry me?"

"Yes!" Kurt tossed the hook to the ground and dragged Blaine up, kissing him. He pulled away after only a few seconds. "Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes."

"I love you so much." Blaine said, voice cracking as he wrapped his arms around Kurt in a tight hug.

"I love you too." Kurt sniffed, kissing him quickly before burying his face in Blaine's shoulder and squeezing him.

"I can't believe Kurt didn't even get a good look at the ring yet." Taylor sniffled from the armchair she was sitting in.

"The ring." Blaine laughed, stepping out of Kurt's arms and sliding the ring on Kurt's ring finger with shaking hands.

"Can't take it back now, Blaine." Burt chuckled as Carole threw herself at the boys, pulling both of them into a hug.

"Nope." Kurt's grandfather added. "You're stuck with us for good."

"You poor, poor boy." Kurt's grandmother shook her head as she wiped her teary eyes.

"It's okay. He's lived with Dad." Kurt sniffled, wiping his own eyes. "I think he can handle it."


	28. AU WBUCT Scene: Alex Meets Kurt

"You have to be nice to him." Blaine whispered, glancing at the door to the Lima Bean for the fifth time in less than a minute.

"Why would I not be nice?" Alex asked, arching his eyebrow.

"Because you love to ruin my life?" Blaine suggested, raising his own.

"Embarrass you? Yes. Ruin your life? Never." Alex grinned. "That him?"

"Would I really date someone who looked like _that_?" Blaine asked.

"True. Well, what does he look like? Is he taller than you? Of course he is, who isn't? I bet he's tall, really skinny, and has blue eyes. You've always liked blue eyes." Alex said thoughtfully.

"No comment." Blaine stood. "I'm going to the bathroom. If you see him—just—you know. Act like a normal human being."

"Normal human being. Got it, little bro." Alex said, waving Blaine on. "Go peepee."

"You've really got to get out of the house without Danny more." Blaine muttered as he walked away.

"Maybe I do." Alex said, glancing at Danny who was in a little booster seat and happily coloring on some paper while humming.

He glanced up when Kurt walked in. Of course he didn't _know _it was Kurt, but… he knew it was Kurt. Tall, thin, perfectly styled hair, startling blue eyes, and confidence like no other. There was no way this wasn't Kurt Hummel.

"Here we go, Danny." Alex said, ruffling his son's dark curls before standing and saying loud enough for Kurt to hear, "Kurt?"

The teenager's eyes widened in surprised, he glanced at what was clearly Blaine's phone on the table—so that was why Blaine hadn't answered his text—and then came forward. "Hello, I'm Kurt Hummel."

"I'M DANNY!" Danny shrieked, drawing attention of everyone in the small café.

"Well hello Danny." Kurt said, laughing a bit.

"DO YOU LIKE MY PICTURE?"

"It's very nice. What is it?"

Danny scowled and crossed his little arms over his chest. "It's a doggy."

"Danny, shh." Alex laughed and held out his hand standing. "I'm Alex, Blaine's older brother. Blaine's older brother with friends in high places that can make people disappear if need be. Blaine's not really going to the bathroom. That's just his excuse because he's nervous, meaning we'll have a few minutes to ourselves. Aren't you excited? You should probably say yes."

"Yes…" Kurt said, trying to figure out if he needed to be scared.

"What are your intentions with Blaine, Kurt?" Alex asked, smiling sweetly. "And keep in mind that you're talking about my baby brother here. I'm as protective over him as I am my infant son… I'm very protective of my infant son."

"I don't intend to hurt him. I… I really care about him." Kurt said as he sat down across from Alex, his voice soft and his eyes sincere. "I like him a lot."

"Why?" Alex asked.

"Why?" Kurt repeated.

"Yes. Why do you like my little brother?" Alex nodded. "There has to be a reason. I want to decide if it's a good enough one."

"I'm the baby!" Danny declared, throwing his crayons into the air.

"Danny¸good grief." Alex sighed, bending down and picking up the crayons. "Take these extra seconds to come up with an awesome answer, Kurt."

"Because he's my best friend." Kurt said simply when Danny had his crayons and Alex was sitting up straight again. "And he's _special_. There's just something about him… He makes me—no, we make each other happy, we understand each other, and we've got great—" Kurt blushed. "Chemistry."

"Ixnay on the chemistry." Alex cringed. "I hope you don't have _too _much because you're both underage and have only been dating three weeks."

"Was my answer sufficient?" Kurt asked hopefully.

"I suppose… But before Blaine gets back, I just want you to know that… if you think Wes and David are scary, you've no idea what I'm capable of." Alex smiled sweetly again, pleased when Kurt swallowed nervously. "He's a sweet boy and I know we'd both hate to see his heart broken."

"I would never do that." Kurt said sincerely. "Never."

"Make sure you don't." Alex said.

"BLAINE!" Danny shrieked.

"Oh. My. God." Blaine said, coming up. "What are you doing, Alex? What are you two talking about? Did you threaten him? _You have to quit doing this_! You're worse than dad."

"Have you met our dad yet, Kurt?" Alex asked, smirking.

"No." Kurt said, swallowing again.

"I'm not worse than dad." Alex's smirk grew.

"GRANDPA!" Danny shrieked happily, throwing his crayons at Blaine. "GRANDPA!"

"Don't listen to him." Blaine sighed, handing Danny his crayons and then taking his seat next to Kurt. "In fact, just ignore anything he says, Kurt."

"Is your dad really that bad?" Kurt asked nervously, glancing between Blaine and Alex.

"No." Blaine said as Alex nodded yes eagerly. "He's really not. Just don't bring up politics and don't give your opinion on political parties and you'll be good."

"I have to meet him next week." Kurt sighed a bit.

"Ouch. That sucks." Alex snorted. "I'm married and have a child and Dad still hasn't met my wife."

"Is that an option for us? I think I'm scarred enough." Kurt whispered as Danny once again threw his crayons into the air while shrieking loudly.

"Uhm… Well, Alex has the excuse of living out of the country and only coming to the states once every three or four months." Blaine bit his lip. "However, we might still be able to postpone that introduction at least… If we make it out of this one alive."


	29. Babies Warning: Christmas

**For the record, Zacky and Nicky are 5-almost- 6 and Sophie is 3.**

"Look at those sleepy faces!" Carole exclaimed, eagerly pulling the front door open and beaming.

"Daddy," Sophie whined, arms wrapped tightly around Blaine's neck. "It's cold."

"I know, baby." Blaine said, snuggling her closer. "We're inside now."

"I'm not sleepy!" Nicky chirped, strutting into the house with a remote control car tucked under his arm. "Where's Grandpa? I wanna show him my Hot Wheels!"

"Grandpa's in the kitchen, hon. Don't I get a hug?"

Nicky dropped his backpack full of toys and jumped into Carole's arms, giving her a big hug. "Hi, Grandma."

"Hello sweetie! Where are Kurt and Zacky?" Carole asked Blaine after setting Nicky down, who ran off yelling for Burt.

"Zacky doesn't want to wake up. Kurt's trying to get him." Blaine said. He kissed Sophie's cheek. "Say hi to Grandma?"

Sophie nuzzled his cheek and yawned in response, arms tightening around his neck. Carole went around behind Blaine and waved at her, smiling. She giggled and waved one little hand before latching back onto her father.

"He gets heavier every day, my God." Kurt grunted, making his way into the house with his almost six-year-old son in his arms. Zacky's hands were around Kurt's neck and his legs wrapped around his chest, looking more than half asleep.

"Snow." Zacky mumbled sleepily, raising his head off of Kurt's chest and looking out the door's window. "Snowing. Snowman?"

"We'll make a snowman tomorrow." Blaine assured him. "A _gigantic_ one."

"Promise?" Zacky asked, sleepily shifting to look at Blaine with big hazel eyes.

"Promise." Blaine ruffled his curls.

"Hey, Carole." Kurt said, kissing her cheek.

"Hi there, sweetie." Carole smiled and grabbed Zacky's hand, squeezing it tightly. "Hello, baby."

"Hello, Grandma." Zacky yawned and blinked at her before letting his head fall back against Kurt's chest..

"Those curls." Carole laughed, freeing his hand. "He still won't cut them?"

"Steadily refuses." Blaine leaned down and stood little Sophie up. "Go find Grandpa?"

"Grandpa-pa-pa-pa!" she squealed, suddenly wide awake and taking off towards the kitchen. "Pa-pa-pa-pa!"

"It's been a long drive." Blaine laughed as Zacky let out a soft snore. "Longer for some than others."

"Bless his heart." Carole laughed.

"Where's my best friend?"

"Melody is asleep. She had a long day. They put on a little Christmas play since it was the last day of school." Carole said. "She had a solo."

"Did she do fabulously?" Kurt asked, resituating Zacky.

"Of course." Carole smiled as Burt came in, Sophie wrapped around his leg and Nicky following on the ground, making his car drive on the floor and imitating an engine revving.

"I feel like I'm supposed to have one more grandchild following me."

"Hey Dad." Kurt laughed, attempting to point to his son while still managing to hold him. "He's right here. I tried to wake him up, but it didn't quite work."

"He still Kurt's baby?" Burt chuckled, hugging Blaine.

"You know it." Blaine laughed, hugging Burt back. "Nick, be careful with that!" He watched as Nicky quickly ran across the floor with his remote Hot Wheels car, leading it right into a table. Blaine almost missed the vase that fell off of the table, but grabbed it just in time.

"Oops." Nicky said happily, turning his car in the opposite direction and chasing it. "Sorry, sorry!"

Kurt shifted Zacky to his other side, or attempted to, and looked down at Sophie, who was bouncing up and down, trying to reach Burt's hand as Burt repeatedly pulled it just out of reach. "Alright, babies. It's bedtime."

"_Daddy_." Nicky whined, coming to a halt in the center of the room.

"Uncle Finn's room. Go, Pooh Bear." Kurt said, pointing to the stairs.

"We wanna play." Nicky pouted, stomping his foot.

"Play, grandpa-pa-pa-pa!" Sophie giggled loudly as Burt scooped her up.

"Daddy's sleepy, Dad is sleepy, and Zacky is already _sleeping_. Shouldn't that twin thing be kicking in by now?" Kurt asked, raising his eyebrow at his son and then promptly yawning.

"I sleepy too, Daddy." Sophie, who would automatically want part in anything Kurt and Blaine said and did, yawned also.

"Aw, are you, baby?" Blaine bent down and kissed the top of her head. He then held open his arms. "C'mon, monkey. Daddy will get you to bed."

"Sleep with Daddy?" Sophie asked, leaning back so she could see him and sticking her lower lip out.

"No, no, no. You're gonna be right in-between Zacky and Nicky, lovey." Blaine said as he picked her up.

"But Nicky hurts me. He kicks."

"Do not!" Nicky said.

"Yes. You do." Kurt scoffed. "Hard. I haven't forgotten Orlando yet, sir."

"That just means you're going to be a big, strong boy, doesn't it, bud?" Burt asked, grinning at his grandson.

"I don't know how big he'll get." Blaine snorted. "Sophie, say goodnight to grandpa and grandma."

Sophie wrapped her little arms around his neck, giving him a look that could rival Kurt's trademark _fine_. "But Daddy, do I _have_ to?"

"Sophia Lily." Blaine said firmly.

"Daddy Blaine." Sophie said right back.

Carole covered her mouth to hide her silent laughter.

"No. It's _Daddy B_." Nicky corrected. "Daddy B."

Blaine shot Nicky a look. "Nick, put the car up and go to bed."

"C'mon, Pooh Bear." Kurt walked to Nicky, Zacky still snuggled against him, and ruffled Nicky's shaggy light brown hair.

"Don't call me Pooh Bear in front of people, Daddy." Nicky said, looking highly offended.

"Would you rather me call you Booger Butt?" Kurt asked.

"I don't have a Booger Butt!" Nicky said loudly, scowling.

"The sooner you babies go to bed, the sooner we get to make cookies and candy." Carole said, smiling.

"This one is half way there." Burt chuckled, pointing at Sophie whose eyes were drooping.

"Say night night, monkey." Blaine said, kissing her chubby cheek.

"Ni ni, monkey." Sophie responded, nuzzling his shoulder. Within seconds she was asleep.

"Alright, Nicky. That's two. The odds aren't in your favor." Kurt said. "Finn's room."

"_Fine_ but this is highly unconstitutional!" Nicky exclaimed, throwing his hands in the air the same way that they had seen Blaine do on the television more than once. "And I won't stand for it!"

Kurt burst out laughing, startling Zacky out of his slumber. He sat up straight and looked around quickly, nearly conking heads with Kurt. "Grandma! Grandpa!" He gave a sleepy smile and then it slowly faded. "Hey, I missed the bridge! Drats!"

"Oh my God. Blaine, get Sophie upstairs fast before she wakes back up." Kurt said, sitting Zacky down and stretching his arms out. "You're getting heavy, babe."

"Grandma, I'm hungry!" Zacky said, going up to her and ignoring Kurt's comment.

"You are just like your Daddy." Carole laughed, hugging him.

"Which one?" Zacky asked, tilting his head.

Carole pointed to Blaine as he carried Sophie up the stairs in trying to keep at least _one_ child asleep. "The one that eats a lot."

"Justice has been done!" Nicky declared, lowering his voice. "And I need a drink!"

"Do you know how much easier my life would be if you were a girl, huh?" Kurt said, scooping Nicky up. "Do you?"

"Dad says the house would be too quiet without _meeee_." Nicky began his sentence in his normal voice but ended it in a falsetto singing voice.

"You've been this energetic since we got into the car at ten." Kurt said. "Can I have some?"

"Some of what?" Nicky tilted his head.

"That energy."

Nicky leaned forward and licked Kurt's face. "There ya go!"

"I'm gonna get you." Kurt laughed. "You're stuck. I'm going to hold you for the rest of the night."

"Are you for serious?" Nicky's hazel eyes widened.

"Mhmm." Kurt said, giving him a tight squeeze.

"Dad! Dad! Help!" Nicky exclaimed.

"Shh, he's putting Sophie to bed." Kurt laughed, covering his mouth. "Ew! Nick! What is this obsession with licking?"

Nicky just cackled into his hand and then leaned back so that his head was angled to the floor. "I'unno!"

"You know how Dad feels about you saying dunno instead of don't know." Kurt said, leaning him down more.

"My hairs touching the floor! Look, grandpa! Look!"

"I bet you could use him as a mop." Burt laughed.

"Nuh uh." Nicky giggled. "Pull me up, Daddy!"

"Say please." Kurt teased.

"Hey, who gave you the cookie?" Nicky said, wiggling and staring at his twin brother.

"Grandma." Zacky said, nibbling. "She gave me one for you too."

"Down, Daddy, down!" Nicky said, flailing his arms wildly.

"Say please." Kurt repeated.

"Manners, schmanners. That cookie's got Santa on it!" Nicky yelped, running over to Zacky when Kurt set him loose. "That's a big cookie."

"She's got a cake too!" Zacky grinned.

"And Rice Krispies." Burt added, chuckling as Nicky cackled and bit off Santa's head.

"Who is Nick pretending to murder now?" Blaine asked, coming down the stairs.

"He gets this from you and your Teddy Grahams, Blaine." Kurt sighed, pointing to the cookie.

Zacky walked to him and held out a snowman cookie. "Grandma gave this to you and Daddy gets the stocking with the bear."

"What'd yours look like?" Blaine asked, ruffling his curly hair.

"Gingerbread man." Zacky gave him a shy smile. "I named him Carl."

"Carl, huh?" Blaine said.

"Mhmm." Zacky nodded and went to give Kurt his cookie.

"Thank you, sweetie." Kurt said, scooping him up. "I think once you boys eat your cookies, we're going to brush our teeth and go to _sleep_."

"Aw but we just got here." Zacky protested.

"Actually you was sleeping." Nicky pointed out.

"Were." Blaine said. "Were sleeping."

Nicky shrugged and tilted his head since he had yet to master the art of eye rolling. Zacky tilted his head back too and giggled, pointing at the ceiling. "I see a spider!"

"Gross. If it comes down I'll kill it."

"No!" Zacky exclaimed, head whipping down to stare at Kurt. "He didn't do anything to you and—and—and I won't let you!"

"It's unconstitutional and we won't stand for it!" Nicky bellowed.

Kurt shook his head. "Next time Blaine has a high profile case on the news one young man will not be watching it."

"It's boring anyway. It's only good when Daddy gets mad." Nicky shrugged.

Zacky giggled. "It is funny. Dad's like…" He did not speak, but instead just shook his entire body really fast and made a squawking noise.

Nicky giggled. "And then he stomps on stuff! Like buildings and-and people."

"And then he yells _Kuuuuurt_!"

"And—and—And _Kreeeeacher, damn dog_!"

"And then Daddy's like '_I just want quiet!' _and, and, and then Dad's like '_Well I just want to give away that dog_!'"

"And then they yell s'more. And then…" Nicky shuddered. "They kiss."

Blaine just rolled his eyes while Kurt shook his head.

"Are they always this energetic?" Carole laughed.

"Yep!" Nicky chirped.

"But we were in the car _all day_, Grandma. Nicky kept kicking the seat. And Sophie kept trying to take the music player." Zacky said solemnly. "She likes the Wiggles. I don't."

"You don't like the Wiggles?" Carole asked.

"I'm too big for that, Grandma." Zacky said.

"I bet you're tired after sitting in the car all day, aren't you?" Kurt asked in a sweet voice.

"Nope!" Nicky said.

"How about we just go and get in bed, alright? And Grandpa will read you some of The Night Before Christmas." Carole said, kneeling down by him.

"I'd rather stay up. This is a trap." Nicky stuck his lip out. "Doesn't Grandma want to see her grandson?"

"Hey, I'm a grandson too!" Zacky whined. "Daddy, tell him I'm a grandson."

"I knows that but I was here first." Nicky said.

"Only by four minutes. Daddy, I'm sleepy." Zacky yawned. "I wanna hear The Night Before Christmas."

"Well come on, kiddo, and we'll get reading." Burt said, holding out his hand when Kurt set him on the floor after kissing his cheek.

"Aw, drats. This is unconstitutional!" Nicky whined as Kurt kissed the top of his head too.

"Little boys needs lots of rest." Carole said gently, kneeling down by him. "So that big daddies can have rest too."

"I'd still rather be up _all _night." Nicky said.

"C'mon, bud." Burt held out his hand. "Bed time."

Kurt waited until the boys were safely on the stairs and out of eyesight before collapsing on the couch. "It's so hard to get Nicky to go to bed, Carole. Oh God."

"You can blame that Ryan kid. _My bedtime is eleven_. Who lets a five year old stay up that late?" Blaine scoffed, sitting in one of the chairs.

"If I hear that Fruit Salad song one more time for an entire week I'm going to hunt the Wiggles down and show them where they can stick it."

"What time do they usually go to bed?" Carole asked.

"Sophie usually falls asleep on her own by 7:30." Blaine yawned. "But we try to get the boys in bed around 8."

"With Nicky it usually ends up being 9." Kurt added.

"Well it's around then now, so they're not going to bed too late." Carole said cheerfully, sitting by Blaine. "You all made really good time."

"If Blaine had been driving we wouldn't have." Kurt rolled his eyes. "I can do an eleven hour drive in nine and a half. He can in twelve. Besides, he's better at solving Sophie Car Meltdowns."

Blaine yawned again and pulled out his cell phone, making sure he had no missed calls. He then raised his eyebrow. "When have I _ever_ said _justice has been done_?"

Kurt shook his head, yawning also. "I don't know. I think the babysitter lets them watch whatever they want when we're gone.

"Sounds like two daddies need rest." Carole said, patting Blaine's leg and standing. "Kurt, your room is all made up for you two."

"Carole, you're amazing." Kurt stood and hugged her.

"I try." She laughed, hugging him back. "You look so good."

Kurt flashed her a bright but sleepy smile. "I try."

"You boys get up to bed. Don't worry about waking up early to be with the kids. I'll take care of them until you're up."

"I wouldn't subject that to my worst enemy." Blaine muttered, earning a punch in the arm from Kurt. "What? It's true. I love them but they can be a bit of a handful."

Burt came down. "All three of your children are asleep. Would you believe Nick was the first one out? His head hadn't even hit the pillow."

"Probably because he spent half the ride here doing tribal calls out the window to anyone in a car without tinted windows." Blaine laughed, rubbing his face and standing.

"There's no way we can go to bed now. It's only just nine." Kurt said, stretching his legs out. "Where are you going, Blaine?"

"'M hungry and if we aren't going to bed, then I'm going to eat." Blaine responded, heading into the kitchen with Burt, who very clearly said something about 'showing you where the good food is hidden.'

"I guess some things never change."


	30. First New Years With Twins

"Okay, okay, okay. I'm home." Kurt bustled into their house. "Pizza and Chinese for the adults and Scarlet, formula for the twins, sparkling cider for everyone although I'm almost positive Wes will sneak in alcohol."

Blaine, who was bending down over a high chair, pulled back and grinned. "Daddy's home!"

The twins both gurgled, smiling.

"Hey, babies!" Kurt ran over to the high chairs, a big smile plastered on his face. "Hey, Nicky! Hey, Zachy! Were you two good for Dada?"

"They were very good." Blaine said cheerfully. "We even got bath times done."

"Before seven?"

"There was a poop explosion… or two…" Blaine admitted. "The good thing is I handled both on my own."

"They both had a poop explosion?"

"No. Nicky's poop just… extra exploded."

Nick kicked his leg up and let out a squeak.

Kurt giggled. "Did you do a big poopy?"

Nick squeaked again, putting his hands on the high chair's table and trying to straighten himself up.

"Big poopy is an understatement." Blaine laughed.

"And poor Zachy getting caught in the middle." Kurt leaned over Zach's high chair and kissed his chubby cheek. He then looked back at Blaine. "It's their first New Year's Eve."

Blaine smiled. "I know. Fortunately, this won't be as messy as Christmas morning was."

"All of that wrapping paper." Kurt shook his head. "Nick practically tore into_everyone's _gifts."

"Honeeey, I'm home!"

"In here, Wes!" Blaine called as their front door shut. Not long after, they heard tiny feet padding and then a three year old ran in.

"Kurt! Blaine!"

"Hey, Scarlet!" Kurt waved as she came to a stop in front of the twins.

"Can I hold the babies? Without daddy's help?"

"Noooo you can't." Wes said, coming in behind her. He passed Blaine a brown bag.

"You did _not _buy alcohol in front of your three year old daughter." Kurt said, eyes widening.

"Psht. I left her in the car." Wes joked.

"Wes—."

"Hey, I have done this two and a half years longer than you. I think I can handle her for five days when her mother is away in Orego—Scarlet, put your panties back on!"

"Daddy, I don't like Hello Kitty!" Scarlet squeaked.

"Well Daddy doesn't like you walking around without undies on."

"Mommy lets me do it." Scarlet argued.

"Scarlet, you act like I was born yesterday."

"Well mommy says you were."

"Put the panties on." Wes said. He then added, "Please, _darling_."

"Only because you asked nicely." Scarlet said, grabbing her Hello Kitty underwear off of the floor and putting them on.

"Help me." Wes mouthed before going over to the twins. "Well hello there, you little chubby balls of marshmallows!"

Zach giggled, reaching for Wes.

"How are his ears doing today?" Wes asked, scooping him up.

"Okay I think." Blaine said, ruffling Zach's curls. "David should be here soon and the food is on the table."

"Pizza, daddy!" Scarlet said, tugging at his pants leg.

"Say please." Wes said, as if he had used proper etiquette a day in his life.

"Pizza, daddy!" Scarlet repeated.

"We know who she takes after." Kurt giggled, giving Scarlet a slice of cheese pizza. "Here, sweetie."

"Say thank you." Wes called as she went into the other room.

"You're welcome!" Scarlet called back.

"Guys, I'm going to go crazy. I mean I know my darling wife had a family emergency but I just don't think I can do it anymore. She eats so much. No wonder it's like we don't have money lately. I'm pretty sure Scarlet eats as much in a day as I can bring home!" Wes whispered. "And bath time is horrible. I had to chase her around the house five times. Around the house in the _yard_, might I add. With it being like twenty five degrees outside."

David came in. "I told you that you should have gone with them, Wes. Can't handle it, can you?"

"I'm fine when she's in school." Wes said, facial expression serious.

"Too bad day care only lasts two hours." Blaine giggled, getting Nick out of his high chair and handing him to David.

"Hello godchild." David said cheerfully. "Blaine, your baby is fat."

"You said it was normal." Kurt said sharply. "You said it was healthy."

"Oh, it's healthy. But they're still fat." David grinned. "Relax, daddy. They're fine. And I see Zachy is cheerful again. Those ears aren't giving you any trouble now, huh?"

Zach, who had stared at him intently from Wes' arm, nuzzled Wes and fell asleep.

"No, Uncle David." Wes squeaked, prompting giggles from Nicky. "He knows who the funny one is."

"Funny looking one." David coughed. "By the way, your child had her underwear on her head. I thought she didn't like Hello Kitty."

Wes thrust Zach at Kurt and then ran into the living room, calling for his daughter.

"When I let you in, she didn't have her underwear on her head…" Kurt said slowly.

"I know." David grinned as Wes came back in.

"You suck, you know?" Wes asked, grabbing a piece of pizza.

"You've said that once or twice. How is the stuff with your wife?" David asked.

"Hopefully she'll be home Wednesday. If it's longer than that, Scarlet and I are going to just go to Oregon until she comes back." Wes sighed. "I'd give my right kidney to _not _have to spend any extra time with her father."

"Hey, I have a client who works in the Black Market. Maybe I can hook you up." Blaine chirped, taking Nick from David and ruffling his light brown curls.

Wes grabbed another piece of pizza. "I mean, if you know a guy…"

"I know a guy." Blaine arched his eyebrow and then laughed, "I have always wanted to say that. Look. I just achieved a milestone by the end of 2020."

"Good for you." David rolled his eyes. "I hope the birth of your twins is on that list also."

"Psht. That's yesterday's news." Blaine said, giving Zach an eskimo kiss and then kissing Kurt quickly. "You're old news, Zachy."

Zachy whined and kicked out his leg.

"What is the likelihood that Scarlet will make it to midnight?" Kurt asked, sitting Zach in his high chair.

"She's probably already asleep on your floor." Wes responded.

David grabbed a slice of pizza, holding Nick in one arm.

"Speaking of sleepy children, we should get the twins to bed so _we _can eat." Kurt told Blaine.

"I suppose." Blaine heaved a big sigh. "It's an awful big hassle."

"Guess you shouldn't have been an over achiever and you'd have had less work." Kurt chirped.

…

"It's a proven fact that I gain weight during the holidays." Kurt said at 11:50 that night, finishing off a plate of Orange Chicken from Panda Express.

"It's a proven fact that if the weight goes to your ass, I might not divorce you." Blaine responded, resulting in a smack to the leg.

"We would so be drunk now if we didn't have kids, Blainers." Wes sighed, pointing as his daughter who was dangling upside down from an arm-chair, fast asleep. "Well, you two have kids. I have a mutation of some sort."

David snorted. "You think she's a perfect angel when you're not the only one taking care of her."

"I'm re-thinking letting you be Zach's godfather." Kurt teased. "I don't know if you can handle it."

"I mean, I'm capable of feeding it. I don't know how sane it'll be." Wes teased right back.

"Don't joke, don't joke." Blaine said, waving his hands. "He might take you seriously."

Kurt turned up the TV, curling up to Blaine with his head rested on Blaine's chest.

"With every single holiday, it's like we get older. I mean, not _physically_. But I don't even think I had any of the alcohol. What's with that?" Blaine asked as the countdown on the TV began.

"I am only 26, Blaine. Do not imply that I am old." Kurt said very seriously.

"I'm pretty sure having two kids puts you in the criteria for being older." David joked.

"But hey, look at it this way." Blaine wrapped his arms around Kurt, holding him in place against his chest. "At least all of those years of night creams worked. You still look amazing."

"Not a day over twenty-six." Wes grinned.

"I wish I'd known when I married Blaine, I was marrying you all too. It may have been a deal breaker." Kurt mock sighed.

"Happy New Year!" Wes and David exclaimed as quietly as they could, not wanting to wake Scarlet.

Blaine leaned forward, kissing Kurt. "Happy New Year, Kurt."

"Happy New Year, Blaine." Kurt smiled and leaned forward to kiss him back.

"Hey, I don't have anyone to kiss." Wes pouted. He then turned, looking in David's direction. "Hey…"

"No." David shook his head. "Happy New Year, but no."

"It was worth a try." Wes shrugged.


	31. Blaine's DUI

"Blaine, calm the fuck down!"

"No! Did you hear what he said to me?" Blaine shouted, struggling to break free from Wes and David's grasp. "Let me _go_!"

"I don't care what he called you. You are drunk and making a bad situation twenty times worse." David said firmly, tightening his grip to the point where it was painful.

"LET ME GO!"

"Are you going to act your age?" David asked.

"If you don't let me go, I'm going to show you pissed off is what I'm going to do!" Blaine shouted over the loud music.

"You're acting ridiculous!"

"HE SAID—."

"I DON'T CARE WHAT HE SAID!" David shouted right back.

"YOU DON'T CARE THAT HE—UGH!" Blaine twisted his arm free, stepping away. "DON'T TOUCH ME!"

"Calm down, Blaine. Calm down." Wes said, taking another step towards Blaine and moving to grab his arm again.

"Don't!" Blaine raised his fist.

"Let's go for a walk." Wes said gently. "Come on. You need some air. You had a bad day; you're emotional enough without this alcohol in your system. It was a bad idea to bring you here. David was right."

"Oh, David's _always _right. David's _always _the boss and he thinks he can tell me what to do because his dad has a fucking degree in psychoanalyzing psychotic people! Am _I _psychotic, David? Is that what gives you the right to tell me to calm the fuck down?"

"No. You're just an idiot right now." David shot back, glaring. "Shut up. You're just drunk."

"Your life is _perfect_." Blaine spat out. "And you—you'll never have to go through this shit and people wouldn't say this shit to you because you're fucking _perfect_. You don't _get it_. You're in your nice _fucking _bubble."

"I'm not the one you're mad at. I'm trying to keep you from doing something stupid."

"It's what I do best! Come out as gay to my homophobic family! Have unprotected sex with guys I don't know! I can't even get a boyfriend because all anyone wants to do is _fuck me_!" Blaine shouted. "I went back to my parents, that was fucking brilliant wasn't it? And I came to this party where that fucking asshole is! He can't say that shit to me and me not do something stupid! Stupid! _I am stupid_!"

"Blaine, you're not stupid. Sometimes you just do stupid things. It's what teenage boys do." Wes said.

"_Great_. I'm not stupid, I just do stupid things? Thanks, Wesley. Thanks a lot." Blaine stormed over to the end table and snatched up David's car keys.

"What in the fuck are you doing?" David, who had been relatively calm as far as he was concerned, ran over.

"Something stupid." Blaine sneered, rushing out of the house and to David's car.

"Oh my God, oh my God." Wes said, eyes wide.

"He just fucking stole my fucking goddamn car!" David screamed, grabbing his phone. "He is drunk as _hell _and he just stole my _car_."

"Are you calling him?"

"He's drunk and driving! I'm not calling _him_! I'm calling my dad!"

…

"What do you have to say for yourself, Blaine?"

"I have never been so ashamed in my _life_. Do you know what this could do to my election if this gets out, young man?"

"What are they doing here?" Blaine asked tiredly, voice scratchy.

"You're sixteen. That means only a legal guardian can get you out." Blaine's father said, motioning for Blaine to get up. "Come on. We're going home."

"I'm not going home with you!" Blaine's voice rose.

"Do not cause a scene or you will regret it." His grandmother hissed in his ear. "Thank the police officer for picking you up safely."

"Thank Super Trooper yourself." Blaine sneered, pushing past his father and walking out of the room he was being held in.

"That's a lovely grandson you've got there, Judge."

"He gets it from his mother."

"Oh! Oh! I've got—I've got a message from—from me to you." Blaine said.

"Thank God." David's mom, Dana, rushed over to Blaine and wrapped an arm around him. "Come on, sweetie. Let's get you out of here."

"Wa-Wait." Blaine held up his hand and looked at his dad. "I _hate_ you. I hate you and your goddamn house and your life and you're really fucking mean, alright? You're mean and I hate you!"

"Come on, sweetie." Dana said again, touching his face gently. "Let's get you home and in bed. This will all be better in the morning."

"I'll be over to discuss how this will be handled tomorrow. Alone." David's dad, Derek, said to Blaine's father, frowning. "I would like to ask that you not come to see him yourself. Anything will go through me."

"Perfect. Tell him I hope that counseling is going real well." Blaine's dad quipped.

"REALLY FUCKING WELL!" Blaine, who was being led out by David's mom, shouted. "APPARENTLY _I'M _THE SANE ONE IN THE FAMILY!"

"Alright, honey. Alright." Dana said soothingly, an arm wrapped around him to keep him from stumbling and falling down. "Shh. Don't let him get a rise out of you."

"He's just dumb and mean." Blaine mumbled as David's mom opened the car door.

"Derek, please come on. These people aren't worth it." Dana carefully shut the car door after sitting next to Blaine in the back seat.

"I'm sorry I'm stupid." Blaine whimpered, head falling against her shoulder.

"You're not stupid, sweetie." She shushed him, running her fingers through his hair. "You're growing up. It's hard enough without having parents like yours."

"They're so mean."

"Don't coddle him too much, Dana." Derek said climbing into the driver's seat. "He did steal David's car and drive under the influence of alcohol."

"Yes well we'll worry about that when he's sober." Dana responded, rubbing Blaine's arm.

"'m sober." Blaine said, voice slurring slightly before he let out a snore.

…

"We're going to have to talk about this." Derek said the next afternoon, sitting across from Blaine. "By living with us, we have to discuss big things that come up. I have to say I'm very disappointed by how things went down last night, Blaine. I expected more from you. You're a smart boy. A very smart and intelligent boy who knows better."

Blaine stared down at the kitchen table, willing his mouth to work.

"First of all, you're much too young to be drinking." Derek said when it became clear Blaine wasn't going to speak. "I realize you're sixteen. If you feel the need to drink, you need to do it safely. I would rather you drink under this roof than other places where situations can escalate like they did last night."

Blaine gave a small nod.

_He's going to make me leave._

_Will Wes' parents want me to stay with them anymore?_

_What if I ruined it_?

Derek sighed. "David says that someone tried to provoke you. You got mad, one thing led to another, and you stormed out because you wanted to do something stupid."

Blaine nodded again. He really was an idiot, wasn't he?

"And when you were pulled over, you got into an argument with the police officer?"

"I was going five miles over the speed limit. They can't pull people over for under nine." Blaine mumbled, not looking up.

"You then proceeded to call him… Super Trooper?"

"He was really annoying and it was the first thing that came to mind." Blaine admitted, glancing up.

Derek blinked at him for a few minutes, glanced into the doorway to make sure nobody was there, and started to laugh.

"Uh… I'm being serious." Blaine said hesitantly.

"Oh, I know you are." He laughed and then shook his head. "Listen, Blaine. You're a great kid. You really are."

"You mean you're not mad?"

"I'm disappointed. Driving under the influence of alcohol or drugs is very dangerous. You could have killed someone. You could have killed yourself." David's dad said, back to being very serious. "It's not something to be taken lightly. Not to mention you've never had proper driving lessons. You… You need to find ways to vent your anger that don't involve… that don't involve sex or dangerous activities."

"Like stealing a car and driving drunk?"

"Exactly." Derek nodded. "Fortunately, your grandma has some connections in some very convenient places. Your permit is being revoked until September. You will be able to take your test thirty days later. If you have a clean record until you are 18, the DUI will be dropped completely."

"Wait, what?"

"It's not how things are traditionally done. At this point, I think you should just be glad you won't have the DUI on your record and let it go past that. Something like that could haunt you forever."

"I don't even have to do community service or anything?" Blaine questioned.

"Oh, no. No community service." He said, standing with Blaine. "But you're grounded."

"Grounded?" Blaine echoed.

"Oh, yes. I am going to treat you exactly the way I would treat David." David's dad smiled sweetly. "You get to clean the living room and kitchen, do the yard, and you have to be home by ten. For three weeks."

Blaine's jaw dropped. He had been several things, but he'd never been… grounded. Typically he was just thrown in his room and told how much of a failure he was.

"I know it seems bad, but that's not all. You like to read and write, correct?"

"Do I have to answer that?" Blaine asked.

"You are going to write me a seven page essay on the dangers of underage drinking and another seven page essay on the dangers of drunk driving. I want three sources per essay." David's dad continued. "Then I want a two page essay about what you learned."

"I guess I can't really protest that with temporary insanity?"

"You most definitely cannot." Derek patted his shoulder as his wife came into the room.

"It's because we love you, sweetie." She said. "Actions like these have to have consequences."

"You can love me a little less if you want?" Blaine asked, spreading his hands apart and then moving them closer together. "About _that _much?"

Dana rolled her eyes. "Go on, you."

"I really am sorry." Blaine said gently, looking down. "Thank you for picking me up from jail. And letting me stay here still… and punishing me too, I guess."

"We know you're sorry." Derek said. "But I think David is the one you need to apologize. It was his new car you stole."

"So I _kind of _committed grand theft auto last night, didn't I?" Blaine asked.

"I suppose you did." Derek responded.

"God. This is going to get like a whole chapter in the Blaine's Stupid Moments journal that David keeps. I've really outdone myself this time." Blaine groaned. "I'm going to go find him now, then."


	32. Romantic Getaway

"I can't believe we're _engaged_. I can't believe we're engaged and on a romantic getaway. I can't believe we're engaged, on a romantic getaway, on the beach!" Blaine exclaimed as he threw himself onto the bed in his and Kurt's vacation beach house. "I can't believe we're engaged, on a romantic getaway on the beach, out of school and all of this really awesome stuff. This is the best year of my life. I can't believe how awesome this year has been."

Kurt crawled onto the bed, kissing him quickly. "You're tipsy, babe."

"I can't believe—."

"Shh." Kurt laughed. "Best year ever, I know, I know."

"I can't believe you've never been to Florida." Blaine rolled onto his side, face to face with Kurt. "I know it's only the third most romantic city in America but I bet we can challenge that."

"Oh, really?" Kurt scooted closer.

"Mhm." Blaine beamed. "Everything seems so magical now, doesn't it?"

"Yeah." Kurt nodded, kissing him once again.

"And no wedding planning." Blaine raised his hand. "None until we're back in New York. Right? We agreed."

"I agreed to _try _to not talk about wedding planning."

"Kurt, we shouldn't have gotten alcohol with dinner. I'm so sleepy." Blaine yawned. "We should have sex the first night of our romantic getaway."

Kurt yawned also. "We're too tired. We should just… nap. We can nap, then go to the beach and…" He yawned again. "And stuff."

Blaine hesitated before nodding. "Sleep now, sex later."

"Mmkay." Kurt curled up. "Love you."

Blaine grinned. "Love you too."

…

"I can't believe this view." Kurt said several hours later, looking out at the beach from their kitchen. "How expensive was this house?"

"Per night or for the week?" Blaine questioned, stretching his arms over his head.

"That much?" Kurt asked.

"So I've spent more money than I ever have." Blaine shrugged one shoulder. "You know the plan."

"Blow as much as you want for a year, spend as much of it on the wedding as we want, and put the rest away for a house and our futures." Kurt walked over, hooking his thumbs through the belt loops on Blaine's shorts.

Blaine smiled and leaned over, pressing a kiss to Kurt's cheek. "Let's have picnic on the beach for dinner. It's late and it doesn't look like anyone's even out right now."

"Okay." Kurt nodded, smiling back. "I love you."

"I love you too." Blaine kissed him quickly.

"Are you sure you're okay we didn't go to Harbor Springs?"

"We can go there whenever we want." Blaine kissed him again. "Considering it's mine. How often can we go to the beach?"

"Valid point." Kurt pulled back and went to the fridge. "I'll make the sandwiches if you get the other stuff ready."

"Alright." Blaine began rummaging through the cabinets, stacking stuff neatly on the counter as Kurt set out to make their sandwiches.

"Have you thought any more about what time of year you want to get married?" Kurt asked as Blaine placed their food and drinks in a medium-sized basket. "Or where?"

"Not summer. I'll be fine with any season except summer. It's too hot and if we switch into shorts later, the pictures will look horrible." Blaine responded, grinning when Kurt placed four sandwiches on top.

"That's so smart. I didn't even think of that." Kurt took the basket from Blaine and moved towards the door. "It's so _pretty_."

"I love the beach. I love water period. It's one of the reasons I love the house in Harbor Springs so much." Blaine held the door open and pulled it shut once Kurt was safely through.

"It's growing on me." Kurt walked down their walkway, more focused on the scenery than where they were actually going—meaning Blaine had to steer him away from walking into rocks, signs, and small children on more than one occasion over the duration of their five-minute walk.

"Is this secluded enough?" Blaine asked once they reached a spot where they couldn't see anyone else. They could still _hear _people, only barely, but Blaine supposed this was better than they'd ever expected for seven at night on the _beach_.

"Yes." Kurt spread a blanket on the sand and then sat on it.

Blaine sat next to him, resting one leg over one of Kurt's and separating the food onto two plates.

"You brought wine for the drink? Have we not had enough alcohol?" Kurt laughed.

"Wine is _romantic_. This dinner—this trip—is about to be us and our romance." Blaine pointed out. He then added, "Also, wine is delicious but I can't drink it with Wes and David because they make fun of me."

Kurt giggled, watching Blaine fill two wine glasses. He then looked out at the water, eyes bright.

"Here." Blaine held out his phone, camera already set.

Kurt eagerly snapped a few pictures of the horizon.

"When did you fall in love with me, Kurt?" Blaine questioned before taking a bite of his sandwich.

Kurt, shocked, set Blaine's phone down and looked at him.

"Hmm?" Blaine quirked a little smile and nudged Kurt's arm with his elbow.

"The first time I saw you."

"How did you know you had _really _fallen in love with me? When did you fall so in love with me that you knew we had to be together for the rest of our lives?" Blaine asked.

"When I wasn't able to find words to describe how I felt about you because words weren't good enough anymore. I reached this point where all I wanted to do was spend time with you—to spend forever with you, as cliché as it sounds. When you still gave me butterflies after so many years. When I found myself willing to do anything to see you smile." Kurt took a sip of his wine. "Does that make sense?"

"Yes." Blaine nodded, looking him in the eyes.

"When did you know you were ready to marry me?" Kurt asked and then teasingly added, "Finally."

Blaine let out a laugh. "I think I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you when you left Parsons for nine days to take care of me when I was sick."

"We weren't even dating then."

"I know but it… resonated with me for some reason. I don't think that's what made me want to spend the rest of my life with you. I think that's when it _hit_ me, though."

"We didn't get back together until a few months after that."

"But I knew. I knew the second you showed up."

Kurt rested his hand on Blaine's thigh, squeezing.

"We still had stuff to work through but… that's when I knew you were going to be mine forever." Blaine smiled. "I knew somehow we'd work it out because even when you didn't have to be there, you were. Twice."

Kurt set his sandwich down on his paper plate and wrapped his arms around Blaine's waist, kissing his cheek. "I'm always going to be there when you need me."

"I know." Blaine smiled again. "Just like I'm always going to be there when you need me."

"I know." Kurt kissed his cheek again.

"I still can't believe we met because you were spying on the Wablers." Blaine chuckled, shaking his head. "You were so adorable with your shorts and your bright blue eyes and your precious smile and your cheeks."

"Hey! You had some pretty chubby cheeks too, Blaine!" Kurt reached up, stroking Blaine's cheek.

"Okay, okay. We both had baby faces." Blaine laughed. "But yours was more adorable."

"I can't help how I look. Don't take it personally." Kurt patted his thigh.

Blaine rolled his eyes. "I remember when you weren't so cocky."

"It was an illusion."

"Build a castle with me!" Blaine suddenly demanded, hopping up.

"We're not done eating."

"We've got all week to eat."

"We also have all week to build sand castles." Kurt pointed out as Blaine dragged him into a standing position.

"But this moment is the best moment." Blaine pulled him closer to the water. "Building sand castles on the beach is, like, the best. You'll see. Screw sandboxes because the beach is where it's at."

Kurt laughed loudly. "Don't we need a bucket?"

"No. We just need some big shells to help us sooth edges." Blaine responded, staring down at the ground. He then bent down and let out an, "AHA! See? Best idea ever."

Kurt bent, kissing the back of his head.

"You're too cute." Blaine grinned, plopping back down on the sand. "Okay. We have to make the base."

"Okay but if I ruin these shorts, you're in trouble."

Blaine waved a hand in the air.

"Have you considered a beach wedding?"

"Beach weddings are tacky." Blaine scrunched his nose up.

"Well what about my grandparents house?" Kurt asked. "You love the property there. Oooh, we could get married when it's decorated at Christmas time."

"No. Annie would be in a frenzy making sure everything was perfect." Blaine shot down as they began to build the base of the sand castle together, showing Kurt the proper way. "Harbor Springs? No, too many familial ties."

"Destination wedding? It's less stressful."

"You've been planning tiny pieces of the wedding for months not to mention you've got like 5 binders you've made since you were eight. If we do a destination wedding, that all goes to waste." Blaine shook his head.

"For someone who said he doesn't care how I do it, you sure have a lot of opinions." Kurt teased, leaning over to kiss him.

"New York or Ohio. Somewhere where we have ties. That's all I ask. And not somewhere that puts added stress on someone we know. It's _our _wedding. We're the ones that should be stressing, not family."

"I see what you mean." Kurt nodded, holding up the base while Blaine smoothed it down. "I don't want a lot of guests."

"Really?" Blaine looked surprised.

"Close family and friends. I want it to be beautiful and private. Our love is special and I only want special people to celebrate it with us." Kurt explained. "I don't want to spend half the reception thanking people for showing up either."

Blaine let out a laugh. "The more people there are, the less likely they are to notice we're fooling around in the bathroom."

"I already told you no more sex in public places!" Kurt exclaimed. "My limit is three times."

Blaine snickered.

"I still can't believe we did that last month. We were mere _seconds _from getting caught by that security guard, Blaine!" Kurt hung his head, looking embarrassed.

Blaine smirked. "I thought it was quite enjoyable."

"I thought it was enjoyable too but…"

"Does this count as a public place?" Blaine asked, quirking up an eyebrow.

"_Yes_." Kurt kept his voice firm. There was no way he was going to be talked into having public sex for the _fourth _time. Really, they'd already had public sex three times too many in his opinion.

Blaine stuck out his lower lip. "There's nobody around."

"What if some kid wandered away from their family?"

"Maybe we could convert it to our evil ways." Blaine leaned over their mini sand castle, stealing a kiss when Kurt wasn't paying attention. "The world needs more gays and who better to convert someone than strapping young men like ourselves?"

"Mmh. You sound like a grandpa sometimes." Kurt smiled and kissed him back. "Hi."

"Hi." Blaine grinned. "What do you say we don't talk about wedding plans any more today? We agreed to limit the wedding talks this week."

"You're right, you're right." Kurt nodded. "I think I'm obsessing because I don't start my actual job for another month… And half the time you're not at the law firm, you're studying for the Bar or calling Adrian with questions about the Bar. _Which I am not annoyed by_. It's a very big test, I know that. I'm just saying that I'm focusing on the wedding until I'm as busy as you are."

"I kind of regret not taking the bar two months after graduation." Blaine admitted. "But this way I'll have work experience and more time to study."

"Bob wouldn't steer you wrong. He's the one that suggested you take the February exam." Kurt responded.

Blaine nodded. "I know you're right. It'd be nice to have it done and over with, though."

"A little extra study time never killed anyone." Kurt laughed.

"Easy for _you _to say. You've never studied for a Bar examination before." Blaine pointed out, returning his attention back to the sandcastle and using the side of the shell to 'carve' a design on the second tier—When had Blaine even done that, Kurt wondered when he realized it had doubled in size.

"We should go in the water." Kurt decided, standing.

"We're not done with the sand castle." Blaine pointed out as Kurt moved towards the water. "Wait, you don't know how to swim!"

"Well you better come over here in case I get sucked in." Kurt winked before pulling his Parson's t-shirt over his head.

Blaine pouted momentarily before running over. "You just threw a shirt on the ground, Kurt."

Kurt moved into the water. "I'm drowning!"

"More wedding cake for me." Blaine teased, chasing after him.

"Technically it'd be a funeral cake and I'll haunt you if I die and you make _a cake_." Kurt giggled, wrapping his arms around Blaine's waist.

"You know we could just take the rest of our clothes off right here and make love in the water." Blaine whispered in Kurt's ear.

"I said _no_." Kurt shook his head. "And if I were to say yes it wouldn't be in broad daylight with people around, okay?"

"Are you saying if I wake you up at 2 am, you might say yes?"

Kurt licked his lips and smirked. "If you think I'll be asleep at 2 am, you've got another think coming, Blaine Anderson."

"God, I love you!" Blaine said before crashing his lips against Kurt's

...

"'_Other Art Walks include Viernes Culturales (Cultural Fridays) on Calle Ocho in Little Havana where Miami's colorful Cuban community shows off their exuberant cultural exports in music, art, and food. There's also the Coral Gables Art Walk on the first Friday of the month, a calmer and quieter Art Walk in historic downtown Coral Gables._'" Kurt read, looking at his phone as they sat outside a crowded café early the next morning.

Blaine, who hadn't drunk much of his drink because he was still half asleep, yawned.

"Do you want to try to find that? It sounds cool." Kurt scrolled farther down. "There's some other stuff here too. Hang on…"

Blaine took a gulp of his coffee and stretched his legs, foot bumping against Kurt's calf.

"Four day Miami shopping spree. Ooooh."

Blaine looked up, shaking his head.

"'_Seeing the gorgeous pastel buildings of Miami Beach's __Art Deco Historic District__is something no first-time visitor should miss. Take a self-guided audio tour or regularly scheduled walking tour of one of the world's greatest concentrations of 1930's architecture_.' Hmm." Kurt continued.

"We can do whatever." Blaine said. "As long as it's not shopping. We agreed that tomorrow would be our one _shopping_ day."

"I know. I just wanted to get some reaction out of you." Kurt gave an impish smile and looked back at his phone. "Do you want to go to one of those things and sight see? Or it looks some there are some festivals. Or we could go to the zoo or the seaquarium."

Blaine took his phone and gasped. "I wanted to do this so bad when my parents forced me to come when I was fourteen. The Miami Lights Evening Air Tour. Can we do that tonight?"

Kurt smiled and nodded. "Of course."

Blaine grinned. "What'd you say first? In Little Havana?"

"Art Walk." Kurt smiled. "Sound good? I bet we'll see a lot of places to go into when we're there. It sounds fun and I'm sure we'll have time to do more stuff after."

Blaine pointed at Kurt's phone. "Seven to eleven at night. We'll have to do it before or after the air tour."

"Damn." Kurt sighed.

"Here, we'll find some festival and just walk around." Blaine stood, finishing his coffee. "Up, Hummel."

"Don't 'Hummel' me." Kurt threw his own cup away and grabbed Blaine's hand. "We really should have put more thought and planning into _being_ here. We had getting here down to a T."

"We've been pretty busy." Blaine pointed out. "You did kind of get home from work three minutes before we left to catch the flight."

Kurt nodded and leaned against Blaine.

They were silent for nearly five minutes, just looking around, until Blaine spoke.

"What is the first thing you want to do after we get married? When we get in the car to leave?"

"Stop at Wendy's and get a large water." Kurt responded instantly.

Blaine let out a loud laugh.

"Weddings are _exhausting _even if you aren't the grooms. You'll thank me." Kurt pointed at him with the hand he wasn't holding. "You'll also probably buy chili or fries depending on the season we get married."

"Yeah but we'll have food at the reception."

"Oh, you're cute." Kurt rolled his eyes. "Ever since graduation, all you do when you're not at the law firm is eat. You are a stress eater."

"You, my dear, are a stress eater. I just like food." Blaine leaned over, kissing his cheek. "Besides everyone has harped me about the weight I've lost since I started Harvard. Look at it this way. By the time we get married, I'll have put on enough weight to make up for all three years."

"You better not, Blaine. You've already been sized for a tux. The last fitting will be in, like, two months." Kurt's eyes widened. "You need to lose weight or maintain what you're at because I'm not marrying you if your pants won't button."

"It's okay, Kurt. I'll get some safety pins at Walmart."

Kurt rolled his eyes as some girls behind them began giggling. "Wedding photos are very important to me, Blaine Anderson. If you ruin them—If you have your friends ruin them—" Kurt pulled away from Blaine, still pointing at him. "I will make you pay."

"Your bark is louder than your bite. Try it on Rachel." Blaine draped an arm around Kurt and turned down a street. "I promise that for however many pictures we ruin, there will be four good ones… But you know Wes loves to photobomb and he's going to be a groomsman… and you saw the facebook picture Alex posted of Danny at a wedding photobombing."

Kurt stuck his lower lip out. "He used to be so cute, you know."

"He's still cute. He's just getting tall." Blaine responded. "A lot like—."

"Don't, Blaine!"

"Melody." Blaine finished.

Kurt sighed heavily. "We should go ahead and have babies since all the little kids I know aren't babies anymore."

"Rachel and Finn just had a baby."

Kurt seemed to cheer up considerably. "That's true."

"Babies, huh?" Blaine nudged him.

"Sooner than later would be nice." Kurt admitted, a little embarrassed. "But I know we're waiting for the wedding and the Bar to be over to really think about expanding or anything."

"Why?" Blaine asked.

"What?"

"Why are we waiting to talk about it? We just finished school and we're about to be married. We don't have to _be _married to talk about babies. Honestly, it's two completely different things. Gay couples who _aren't _married adopt all the time." Blaine shrugged. "Besides, c'mon. We've known we wanted two kids—preferably two girls—since we were eighteen. And we're going to be 30 in, like, five years. Most guys our age have kids already."

"Yeah but we can't just forget a condom and call a whoopsiedaisy." Kurt retorted.

"So let's find a surrogate or an adoption agent and then call a whoopsiedaisy." Blaine looked at him.

"Now?"

"Preferably next week when we're not on our vacation." Blaine laughed. "But, yeah. Now. We'll start planning for it now."

Kurt let out a squeal and threw his arms around Blaine. "I'm so excited!"

"Me too!" Blaine laughed, hugging him back.

"Life couldn't be any more perfect for us than it is now, you know?" Kurt asked contently, smiling at Blaine.

"I know." Blaine smiled back before lacing their fingers together. "C'mon and let's find a store to duck in or something. It's getting very hot out here."

"I told you to wear a lighter shirt." Kurt chastised as he pulled Blaine into a random shop. "You really should have figured out by now that I know best."

"Sorry, mother."

...

"I'm going to call Burt and tell him we're not coming back." Blaine announced two nights before leaving Miami.

Kurt looked up from the edge of the bed, where he was sitting cross-legged and putting shorts into a suitcase.

"Nooo! Don't unpack!" Blaine whined.

"I'm not Wes. I can't pack up five minutes before a plane arrives." Kurt laughed.

"We aren't leaving therefore we don't need to paaaack." Blaine came over, tugging Kurt off of the bed.

"Bob already called to make sure you were showing up Tuesday." Kurt said.

"Bob'll get over it."

"Bob fought tooth and nail to get you to New York with him in a new firm and he's gone out of his way more than once—."

"Because I'm awesome and he loves me." Blaine finished. "So he should want me to be happy."

"Yeah I'm pretty sure the conversation won't so much go that way, dear." Kurt patted Blaine's shoulder.

Blaine pouted a bit. "Why don't we buy a beach house and stay here?"

"Do you have any idea how much money we—you—just spent on _buying _our apartment in New York City. The perfect apartment which I've yet to finish decorating."

"Fine. I guess we can go back to New York." Blaine let out an overly dramatic sigh. "But I want to do something first."

"What?"

"Watch the sunset." Blaine answered. "I packed a snack."

"I thought you wanted a quiet night in."

"Well we're changing it to a quiet night out." Blaine smiled. "Come outside with me?"

"Yeah." Kurt nodded. "Just let me grab my camera."

"Okay." Blaine smiled again, patiently waiting for Kurt to return and then leading him out of the beach house.

"I really don't want to go home the morning after tomorrow either, you know." Kurt admitted as they walked along the sand, heading to their usual spot which was typically deserted. "It would be nice to live in a place like this, constantly on vacation…"

"If I didn't know I'd get bored, I'd want to live a place like this. Well, Harbor Springs." Blaine laid a blanket out and sat down, scooting so Kurt had room to sit as well.

"Michigan isn't that far from New York. When you get vacations, we can go." Kurt reached over, taking Blaine's hand in his own.

"And when we're established enough in our careers, maybe we can stay there over summers. Or part of them, at least." Blaine thought aloud, sounding hopeful.

"You know when I was younger, I always wanted a summer home?" Kurt bumped his shoulder against Blaine's. "It's a good thing I found a trust fund baby who could provide."

Blaine snorted loudly. "Is that your way of saying you're not opposed to long stays in Michigan?"

"Yeah. It is." Kurt reached into the bag of snack Blaine bought, pulling out a few pretzels and munching on one.

"I've enjoyed getting to spend so much one on one time with you this week… We both work so much. The last time we spent this long together was Christmas break." Blaine moved into a laying position.

Kurt lay down, snuggling close. "I've enjoyed it too… Even if you dragged me to the Jungle Zoo or whatever and made me interact with safari animals."

Blaine let out a loud laugh. "It was so cool, though!"

"You really are a big kid." Kurt smiled, resting his head on Blaine's chest and looking out at the water. "You know, a beach wedding at night wouldn't be quite as tacky as during the day… It's really beautiful."

"It is beautiful but it's not what we want. Everything should be perfect." Blaine whispered, running his fingers up and down Kurt's arm.

"As long as you're there, we could make anything perfect." Kurt glanced up, making eye contact.

Blaine grinned, the same grin reserved for Kurt and Kurt alone. "I love you."

"I love you too, you goof." Kurt grinned back and pushed himself up so he could kiss Blaine. "And I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with you."

"That's a lot of time." Blaine teased, tsking. "You sure you can handle it?"

"Wellll, I mean, you've got a summer house. I think I'll have to manage." Kurt joked. "Besides, you haven't taken me to France yet."

Blaine let out a loud laugh. "Maybe I should sell the Michigan house and take back that France promise, and then see what your response would be."

Kurt playfully smacked his chest before sitting up the rest of the way and snapping a picture of Blaine with his camera. "Shut up, asshole."

"Asshole?" Blaine asked, sitting up and scooting closer. "So you don't like me to imply you're only with me for my money, then?"

"If I was only with you for your money, would I have let you waste so much of it on Harvard? Clearly we could have enough to live more than comfortably without either of us working a day in our lives. Also, why would I have bothered to go to school? Do you know how much out-of-state tuition was for Pars—Mmmph!"

Blaine kissed Kurt, smiling into his lips. "Be quiet, Kurt."

"You be quiet." Kurt said, lying flat on his back and pulling his fiancé on top of him.

"Mmmh why?"

"Because if you keep talking, I'm going to change my mind." Kurt whispered in his ear before pulling back and giving playful (ahem, extremely sexy) smile.

"About what?"

Kurt reached between them, unbuttoning Blaine's shorts. "Four times in public."

"I intended to dance to the rhythm of the waves tonight but not _that _kind of dancing." Blaine said excitedly, moving off of Kurt and tugging his own t-shirt off.

Kurt tugged his own shorts down and sat up, playful smirk still on his face. "Aren't you going to take my boxers off?"

"Faster than you can say please." Blaine said before pouncing on Kurt. "This is the _best. Year. Ever."_


	33. Cooking Lesson

"If you're going to be a father, you need to know how to cook more than breakfast foods, pasta, and chicken." Carole said as soon as Blaine came into the kitchen.

"You led me here on false pretenses?" Blaine stuck out his lower lip in a pout.

"Yes. I worry that you'll feed these twins fast food from the day they leave the hospital and, hon, I refuse to have unhealthy grandchildren." Carole smiled sweetly and handed him an apron.

"An _apron_?" Blaine laughed.

"Put it on." Carole urged.

"What are we making?" Blaine sighed, doing as told only because he feared being murdered otherwise. That or glared at. It was never fun to have Carole glaring at you. "Did Kurt put you up to this?"

"No. But, sweetheart, you know how to cook breakfast foods, brownies, and three dinner meals. Unless you plan on hiring a live in chef, you should have a little more under your belt, don't you think?"

"I have a Harvard degree. How hard can cooking really be? What's this?"

"It's a ham. I'm going to go check on Melody. All you have to do is put it in the oven. That is _it_. Put it in, close the door, and do nothing else until I get back. Okay?"

"I'm sure I can handle _that_." Blaine scoffed as Carole left the room.

_Five Minutes Later_

"Carole, I started a fire! How do you use fire extinguisher?"

"You _what_? How?"

"I don't remember. It's kinda hazy." Blaine said as Carole pushed him out of the way, grabbing the fire extinguisher from him. "I'll buy you new curtains and a new stove…"

Carole shot him a look. "You, young man, are in trouble."

"You're the one that told me to put it in the oven." Blaine protested.

"No. I mean when your children are old enough to eat solid foods that don't come premade in a jar, you are in trouble." Carole sighed, setting the fire extinguisher down and looking at Melody who was standing in the doorway, snickering.

"Oh, go away." Blaine huffed.

"You're in a yellow apron." Melody giggled. "Even Kurt won't wear yellow aprons."

"Take a picture. It'll last longer." Blaine scoffed.

Melody held up Carole's cell phone. "I already did!"

"Get back here, you runt!" Blaine yelled, running past Kurt and Burt who had just come in.

"What happened?" Kurt gasped, looking at the singed curtains.

"It'll be a miracle if your children make it to two months with Blaine as a father." Carole teased.

"You mean Blaine set the kitchen on fire?" Burt asked.

"Really just the inside of the stove and the curtains… and I've yet to figure out how either happened." Carole said as Melody ran up.

"I want that picture, Melody!"

"NEVER!" Melody cackled, hiding behind Burt. "Save me, Daddy!"

"You have to delete that picture. Melody is evil. She'll put it on my Facebook, which is connected to my LinkedIn which clients and coworkers see and—." Blaine said.

"Can I post the video of you talking to the fish cup, then?" Melody giggled, poking her head out from behind Burt's leg.

Burt chuckled.

"Burt!" Blaine gasped. "Really?"

"You gotta take it up with Mellie here."

"If you can catch me." Melody smiled sweetly before tearing from the room again.

"I'm having twins with a _child_." Kurt sighed. "I need a drink."

"You also need to find your husband so he can buy me a new stove." Burt snorted.

"Fine. I'll break them up since you two and Finn are too afraid to do it." Kurt massaged his forehead and walked from the room, calling out both of their names sternly.

"I was trying to help, Kurt!" Carole called after him.

"I gave up a long, long time ago!" Kurt called back. "The only response I ever get when it comes to cooking lessons is 'I have a Harvard degree' which _only goes so far in life, Blaine_!"

"NONONONONO!" Melody began shrieking.

"All of this came from asking him to put a ham in the oven." Carole stated, looking at Burt.

"Was it already set up and everything?" Burt questioned.

"Well, of course." Carole said. "I told him to put it in the oven and that's it."

"Once I served Kurt frozen meat when he was little." Burt said thoughtfully. "I thought it was done. Come to think of it, I don't even know if the oven was on all day…"

"I don't think Blaine could have found more of a perfect family to marry into." Carole shook her head as she smiled.

"Neither could you have."

Carole rolled her eyes as Blaine and Melody ran through the room again.

"I give up. Let them kill each other." Kurt announced, coming in behind them. "It's not worth the effort."

"Welcome to what raising a child with Blaine will probably look like, kid." Burt grinned.

Kurt groaned. "When I met him he was the lead singer in an a cappella glee club. How was I supposed to know all this was hidden under that blazer and hair gel?"


	34. Jealous Blaine

"So… Blaine…" David said casually after Kurt left the cafeteria, oblivious to at least 4 heads turning to watch him go.

"Yes?" Blaine asked looking up from his French homework. He should really have just asked Kurt for help, but he didn't want to look _stupid_.

"Have you noticed that… well…"

"Someone else is about to make a move on your man." Wes said cheerfully. "Actually, more than one someone."

"Psht. What are you talking about?" Blaine said, letting out a laugh. _No, really. What are they talking about_?

"Oh, come on. If you were a dog you would have peed on Kurt already. You wait to walk him to breakfast, you keep 'showing him around' even though he probably knows where everything is, you _share your candy with him_. It's cute." David said.

"Hold up. You share _candy _with him? You won't even let us have some of your candy!" Wes said loudly. "Not cool, Blainers. We are your best friends. Do you want to be homeless over spring break?"

"I'm staying with David over spring break." Blaine rolled his eyes.

"Exactly. He's clearly fuming." Wes said, pointing.

"Shut up." Blaine elbowed him. "You can have some of my candy if you would like, Wes."

"You would go there." David snickered. "Nice cover up, Blaine. But in all seriousness, people are… you know… kind of ogling him."

"You know how the gay boys are. Anytime someone gay comes in, they're all fighting for him." Wes said.

"No one did that over me." Blaine shrugged.

"They did. You were just too anxious to see the kindness as being hit on." David laughed. "You're so endearing. Well, you were. Now you're just a pain in the ass. Just talk to him already. _Andrew _was eyeing him, Blaine. This is serious."

"From the soccer team?" Blaine hissed.

David and Wes exchanged smirks.

"I hate that guy. He's always trying to be better than me. He just needs to get over his hideous ugly self." Blaine scowled. "He is not better than me at soccer or _anything_. I'm so over him."

"Did you go on a date or something with him once?"

"I don't count it as a date. I barely got a hello out before I was pushed into the wall and his tongue was—gross." Blaine shuddered. "He _cannot _talk to my—to Kurt. He's not talking to Kurt. He's a creep and Kurt is too nice and sweet for him anyway."

"Yeah. Kurt needs someone like you." Wes said, voice serious.

"He doe—." Blaine trailed off and narrowed his eyes. "You two are horrible. You're lying."

"The last time Kurt was waiting for you after soccer practice with us, he came up to him." David said very seriously. "He was rather… uh… Well, he looked like he wanted to do to Kurt what he clearly did to you."

The lid popped off of the water bottle Blaine was holding and some shot out. "_What_?"

"Right. You better go hold Kurt's hand or something. It's for his safety really." Wes said and then elbowed Blaine hard.

"What? I'm trying to figure out what to d— Andrew."

"Hey, Blaine." A tall blonde said, giving Blaine a charming smile. "How are you?"

"Lovely." Blaine snapped. "What do you want?"

"So, you're friends with Kurt, right?" The guy asked, charming smile not leaving his face.

"Why do you want to know?" Blaine asked as David pried the water bottle out of his hands to avoid another waterspout incident.

"I'd like to get to know him on a one to one basis if you get what I mean." Andrew winked.

"I don't think I do." Blaine said sweetly. "Do you mean sexual harassment?"

"Hey, we're not all prudes like you. And I heard you made your way around before." The guy said.

"How was the herpes test result?" Wes asked loudly, anger evident on his face. "Is there anything they can do for you in the meantime, Andy Boy?"

"Don't talk about that." Andrew hissed. "Can I have Kurt's phone number or not?"

"Sure." Blaine pulled out his phone, pushing several buttons.

"Really?" Andrew asked eagerly.

"Oh, yeah. We're friends after all, right?" Blaine smiled sweetly. "Ready?"

"Yeah." Andrew pulled out his phone. "What is it?"

"614-222-3604. That's 3604." Blaine said.

"Thanks, Anderson." Andrew turned and left.

"That's not Kurt's number…" David said slowly.

"Nope. It's Planned Parenthood." Blaine said, holding up his phone where Google results were pulled up.

"Nicely played!" Wes said.

"I thought so too." Blaine stood. "I'm going to go warn Kurt, though."

"Tell him you like him already!" David called.

"I haven't the slightest idea what you're talking about!" Blaine called as he made his way out of the cafeteria. Like Andrew was going to 'get to know' _his _Kurt.


	35. AU: April Fool's Day

**Note: The actual Klaine wedding in my verse does not take place on April Fool's Day. This was a prompt!**

"_Where is he_? The ceremony is supposed to start in fifty-eight minutes! _Fifty-eight minutes_!" Blaine exclaimed.

"I—I don't know what to say. I tried calling David twenty times. His parents and sister are here but they haven't heard from him." Wes said, staring at Blaine.

"Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God. David has to be here! Firstly, the point of me not having a best man is so both of you could be next to me! Second of all, if he's not here pictures are going to—oh my God, oh my God." Blaine began to pace."Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God…"

"He's still got time to get here?" Wes said. "A full… fifty five minutes. It's not hopeless."

Blaine sank into a chair, staring ahead blankly. "I feel like I'm in one of those horrible movies where one thing goes wrong and all of a sudden everything is going wrong and you can't breathe and you knew it was too soon but it didn't feel too soon, it felt right, but… but… _are you sure he's not here, Wes_? It's _David_. Maybe something is wrong."

"I'm sure he's not here. His car isn't in the parking lot. Finn checked the sitting room. He's not here." Wes said.

"I can't get married without David here!" Blaine threw his hands in the air. "David is one of my two best friends! You both have to be there by me!"

"Be right back. My phone's ringing." Wes said, standing and stepping into the hall.

"Where is he going?" Blaine asked exasperatedly, looking at Alex.

"Relax, Blaine." Alex laughed. "He'll get here."

Blaine took a deep breath, then two more, and then another two.

"Uh… Blaine…" Wes came back into the room as he pocketed his phone. "His car is broken down. He's an hour and a half away."

Blaine stared at him in shock, hazel eyes widening. "Wh-What?"

"He's not going to make it in time. He said to just start and he'll hopefully be here by the reception and—."

"No." Blaine stood, officially freaking out. "No. I am not getting married without David here. The whole reason we didn't pick best men was to avoid the choosing thing, and he needs to be standing there because then it'll look uneven and because _I need him there_!"

"Blaine, Blaine, Blaine." Alex stood and put his hands on Blaine's arms, giving him a gentle shake. "Calm down."

"But—."

"Big picture." Alex said quietly.

"Marrying Kurt." Blaine took a deep breath.

"Right." Alex nodded.

"But David is like my brother. We can reschedule the wedding! Yeah! We'll reschedule!"

"You cannot reschedule a wedding like _this_." Wes gestured around the room. "Plus, you know how far in advance you had to book this place. You've paid in full. Think of all that money you'd lose. It's got to be close to a million if not more."

"Is it hot in here? I think I'm going to pass out." Blaine said, hazel eyes still wide as he picked up a brochure and tried to fan himself. "Kurt. I've got to talk to Kurt."

"You can't talk to Kurt!" Wes said. "You two agreed to not see each other before—."

"I'm talking to Kurt!" Blaine strode towards the door and threw it open, nearly plowing into David who bent over laughing hysterically.

"I hate you!" Blaine exclaimed loudly, punching David. "You mother fucking_assholes!_"

Wes doubled over also, laughing so hard that he was having trouble breathing.

"I hate you, I hate you!" Blaine exclaimed again.

"What did they do?" David's sister Danielle asked, rushing into the room and hugging him.

"Your brother and the nimrod are fucking assholes is what! They said David wasn't going to make it!" Blaine ranted.

Danielle shot a glare at both of them. "I told you two to not mess with him today. Blaine, do you need some water?"

"No, but some Vodka and two new best friends would be nice." Blaine snapped, glaring daggers at Wes and David.

"Find me a new brother while you're on the hunt then." Danielle laughed. "Do you really want to get drunk on your wedding day? After all, Kurt looks very handsome in his suit. You should probably stay sober so you can remember it."

"I look better, right?" Blaine asked, arching an eyebrow.

"Of course, but I've known you a lot longer so I'm biased." Danielle said, patting down a short curl that was threatening to mess up his perfectly styled hair. "And Kurt is going to _love _this hair."

"He aims for Kurt to not be able to keep his hands off him." Wes offered, smirking. "He wants to get laid."

"I don't deny it…" Blaine said, sending another glare at Wes. "Asshole 1." He then looked to David. "Asshole 2."

"Why can't I be asshole 1? It was my idea." David whined.

"Are you sure I can't have alcohol?" Blaine asked Danielle.

"Yes." She laughed as she left the room. "But I'll get you some water."

"I hate you and I hate you." Blaine said, pointing to the boys. "Just wait until you two get married. _Payback is a bitch_!"

"I don't know what's funnier. That he believed the whole thing or that he thinks he's actually being menacing." David chuckled as he pulled on his tuxedo jacket.

"One of these days, I really will disown you two." Blaine mumbled.

"You've said that since you were sixteen and it's not happened yet, my dear." Wes sang. "Hey, is there supposed to be a tear in the back of my jacket?"

"_What_? I looked them all over!" Blaine yelped, eyes widening in horror.

Wes giggled immaturely. "Couldn't help it, Blainers. Sorry. I just couldn't."

"When my foot is up your _ass _I'll say that I couldn't help it and we'll see how well that excuse works." Blaine muttered, glaring. "Asshole."


	36. AU: Eye Surgery

"_What were you thinking_?" Wes hissed. "Blaine will be here in five minutes so you better get talking. And believe me, it better take the whole five minutes too. _Eye surgery_, David."

"That wasn't meant to happen to him!" David exclaimed. "I thought it was a slushie."

"So it was okay to slushie Kurt?" Wes asked, blinking at David as if he was stupid. "Come on. You know how happy he makes Blaine and you know how much he _needs _that. And if that had hit Kurt—if Kurt had needed surgery—Blaine would never talk to you again. You know how he is about Kurt. I still half expect him to turn and walk out when he sees you here."

"I didn't know there was—whatever in it. I didn't know that." David said. "They never told me that. Thad and I got there late after Sebastian had already started the meeting."

"You don't start a meeting without _all _Warblers in attendance unless it's been excused by _all three councilmen!_" Wes slammed his hand on the table. "I worked for four years to make that club what it was. You had a real chance of winning this year—even without Blaine! _What did you three idiots do to my Warblers_? How could you let this happen? Was it because I didn't let you use the gavel enough?"

"You're so obsessed with that damn gavel. And I'm _sorry_. I really didn't know that it was tampered with. Blaine is one of my best friends. I wouldn't do that. I didn't think Blaine would jump in front of it like that. And Sebastian said he was only aiming to ruin Kurt's jacke—."

"No excuse! You never should have let this happen. The Warblers offered a place of safety to both Kurt and Blaine. Once a Warbler, always a Warbler. You've let this gay faced—I don't care what he says; he's got a gay face just as much as Kurt does—but you've let this gay faced creep waltz in, harass two of your friends, run what I've built for into the ground, and you let Blaine end up in the hospital… And then you walked away."

"Firstly, I went with them to try to find out what in the hell he put in that slushie so they could tell the doctor." David snapped. "Secondly, when they wouldn't tell me, I went back. I stayed until they took him to the hospital. Thirdly, I resigned from the Warblers. Okay? I didn't know that was going to happen and I feel horrible about it. Don't make me feel worse, okay? Blaine already hates me; do you want to stop being my friend too?"

"Blaine doesn't hate you."

David turned in his seat to see Blaine, hands in his pockets and looking down. "Blaine—I am so—"

"It's okay. Well, it's not okay… but I heard what you said and I believe you didn't know." Blaine said slowly. "You didn't have to quit the Warblers."

"I'm not the only one who did. Thad quit as soon as he found out you needed surgery." David said. "And I did have to quit. I couldn't be there after what they did."

"Everyone else knew what was in it." Blaine said, looking up. "Sebastian told me. They wanted to ruin Kurt's clothes. They knew what they were doing. They didn't know I would jump in front of it and get hurt, but they knew exactly what was in it. They knew there was a risk. Even if it had only gotten on Kurt's arms, he still would have had to have gone to a doctor."

"But you still never should have agreed to even a normal slushie." Wes added. "You know what Kurt ran from when he came to Dalton. I can't believe you let this happen, David."

"Right. So you better buy my coffee every single time we hang out together for the rest of my life." Blaine said, sliding into a seat between his two friends. "Because it's going to take a lot of coffee and sweet talking to make this go away."

"I'll go get you one now." David stood and walked off.

"How long are you going to make him buy you coffee?" Wes asked, laughing a bit.

"Months. Maybe a year. My eye still hurts and the surgery was a week ago." Blaine said very seriously. "Besides, it's nice to be the one in control for once."

"Oh?" Wes arched his eyebrow as Kurt came into the coffee shop, looking around and then heading over.

"You know Kurt. I can't even control the radio station." Blaine snorted as Kurt came up behind him. "Imagine how controlling you think he would have been throughout this ordeal and multiply that by, like, forty."

"Hey, cutie." Kurt grinned and ruffled Blaine's hair.

Blaine jumped , head whipping around. "Hi, Kurt! How long have you been there?"

"Long enough to know I'm controlling." Kurt teased, sliding into the seat next to Blaine's that David hadn't been sitting at.

"You've really spent the last week at Kurt's house?" Wes asked curiously. "And _your _dad hasn't cared?"

"My parents are out of town again and Burt didn't want me alone in our huge house after my surgery." Blaine shrugged.

"Hey, David." Kurt said very cordially as David came back with Blaine's coffee.

"Hey, Kurt, look—."

"It's fine." Kurt raised his hand. "Blaine's alright now. That's all that matters."

Both Blaine and Wes looked at him, surprised.

"What? I told you two I could be nice." Kurt shrugged.


	37. Babies Warning: Disney World

"Do you have the bags packed?" Blaine whispered, tiptoeing into Sophie's bedroom.

"I've got Sophie's packed and the twins are half packed. I'm waiting on another load of laundry." Kurt whispered back, tucking Sophie's packed bag into the top of her closet. "Blaine?"

"Yeah?"

"The kids are at school. Why are we whispering?"

"Ohhhh. I guess I'm just so used to talking about it to where they can't hear." Blaine gave Kurt a sheepish smile. "Are you excited?"

"_So _excited!" Kurt beamed, walking to Blaine and kissing him square on the lips. "This was such a good idea."

"I know." Blaine grinned, sliding his arms around Kurt's thin waist. "I'm just glad we were both able to get off of work to actually follow through with it."

"I can't wait to see their faces when they figure out where we're going." Kurt let out a content sigh and then bit his lip. "But I'm a little worried about taking them on a plane. You know they've never flown before."

"They'll be fine." Blaine promised him. "They're old enough to fly. Sophie's six, the twins are eight."

"Yeah…" Kurt didn't' look convinced.

"And we'll be there to hold their hands." Blaine kissed his cheek as the dryer began to beep.

Kurt kissed him quickly before going to get the clean clothes. "You can help me, you know?"

"Does that mean sex on the washer?"

"No. It literally means you can help me fold clothes."

"Eurgh. Isn't that why I married you? So I wouldn't have to do that stuff?"

"Blaine… dear… you can fold all of them." Kurt said, smiling sweetly.

"Aw drats! I take it back! I take it back!" Blaine cried dramatically, sounding just like Zachy.

"My God. I can't believe I willingly let you bring a mini Blaine into this world." Kurt sighed, making his way into the laundry room and opening the dryer.

Blaine pulled up a clothing table and set it between them, beginning to fold the kids' clothes as Kurt set them on the table. "So the plan is to pick them up from the bus stop and head to the airport from there?"

"Yeah. We'll stop and get some food on the way since I'm sure they'll be hungry." Kurt nodded. "You're _sure _the rental car is reserved in Florida?"

"Yes, Kurt. I'm sure. For the fifth time." Blaine laughed. "You don't trust me very much."

"Yes well you forgot Nick at David's two years ago."

"Oh my God. Are you ever going to let it go?" Blaine groaned.

"Nope." Kurt sang, closing the dryer and helping Blaine fold the remaining clothes.

"It had been a long day." Blaine said weakly.

"I remember you making that same argument two years ago." Kurt rolled his eyes. "Come and help me pack these so we can get our stuff packed?"

"Only if you quit harassing me."

"_You forgot your child_."

"Yes well I didn't forget to get the rental car." Blaine scoffed, edging out of the room. "I'll be there in a minute to help you pack their clothes."

"BLAINE!"

"I'm sorry! I was busy!"

"_Blaine…_"

"I'm doing it now. I swear!"

…

"But why are we at the air-o-port?" Sophie asked as Blaine lifted her out of the back seat.

"Yeah. Daddy said we were going to get dinner." Zachy added as Kurt grabbed his hand.

"But we did get dinner, baby." Kurt said, reaching for Nicky's hand.

"Daddy, I don't need to hold your hand." Nick scoffed.

"Okay, meanie." Kurt made a face at him as they walked towards the crowd. One person walked between Kurt and Nick, and Nick scurried back to Kurt, holding out his hand. "Uh huh. Daddy knows best, huh?"

Nick grunted but squeezed his father's hand, walking close to him. Kurt stepped aside with the twins, waiting for Blaine and Sophie to catch up.

"Got the tickets?" Blaine asked.

"Blaine…"

"Just kidding." Blaine grinned, fishing the tickets out of his blazer pocket.

"Tickets to what?" Nick asked.

"We're going to ride on an airplane!"

Nick's eyes widened—but not in delight, in _horror_. "What?"

"It'll be fun."

"Can I stay here?" Nick asked.

"I think it'll be cool!" Zach chirped.

Kurt let go of Zach's hand and knelt by Nick. "Baby, it's just like a car."

"But in the _air_." Nick whimpered.

Kurt glanced up at Blaine, clearly saying, _I told you so._

Maybe surprising the kids hadn't been the best way to go about this.

Blaine knelt also, ruffling Nick's hair. "It's going to be just fine, Nicky. It'll be over before you know it and when it is, you're going to be soooo excited to see where we're going."

"I don't wanna." Nick's lip began to tremble.

"You've got to be a big boy, honey. We have to get on the plane in just a few minutes." Kurt said gently as Sophie and Zachy giggled together about some random person's weird hat.

"I'm scared!" Nick argued. "I don't want to go on the plane. They're loud and scary!"

"Nick, sweetie… we have to go." Blaine sighed, lifting his chin so Nick was looking at him. "But me and daddy will _right _with you the whole time. We would never let anything bad happen to you."

"You can't h-help it in a plane!"

Blaine handed Kurt the tickets and then scooped Nick into his arms, whispering soothingly in his ear and rubbing his back. "It's okay to be nervous but you're going to have to conquer that fear."

Nick sniffled, burying his face in Blaine's neck.

"It's okay, it's okay. Take a deep breath."

Nick raised his head up, taking a deep breath in and slowly letting it out.

"Better?" Blaine asked, brushing some of his wavy hair back.

"No." Nick sniffled again. "C-Can you sit by me?"

"Yes, I can." Blaine kissed his cheek. "I'll even hold your hand until we get there if you want."

Nick nodded, nuzzling Blaine.

Kurt smiled, looking positively giddy. "Okay, babies. We have to go through security and do a few things and then we'll get to get on the plane and go to—."

Blaine slapped his hand over Kurt's mouth, eyes wide. "_To a very fun place_."

"Whoops." Kurt cringed. "Sorry! I almost let it slip!"

…

"I did it! I did it! I did it!" Nicky cheered as they ran up to the rental car. This was the same thing he had been saying (saying, cheering, singing, screaming—he'd covered all the bases) for the last forty minutes since getting off of the plane.

"Yes, honey, you did." Kurt said, handing a sleeping Sophie to Blaine and opening the car door.

"I did it! I did it!"

"Be quiet." Zach whined.

"Aw, you guys are no fun." Nick pouted.

"Sophie, wake up." Blaine whispered, shaking little Sophie after she was buckled in the middle seat in the back of their rental car.

Sophie whimpered, waving him away. "No, Daddy."

"Yes, baby." Blaine laughed, poking her until she had sat up, fully awake.

"Nick, quit dancing so I can buckle you in." Kurt grunted from the other side, trying to wrestle Nick into the car. "How do you have so much energy? Even after being so anxious earlier?"

"Grandma says it's 'cause I'm a growing boy." Nick giggled, raising his arms so Kurt could buckle the seat belt.

Blaine crawled out and hoisted Zach up into the car as well.

"Now it is very important that you all three stay awake!" Kurt said excitedly as he got into the passenger seat of the car.

"Daddy, why do you have a camera?" Zach asked.

"I just want to take a picture of you three on your first trip to Florida! Can I have big smiles?" Kurt asked as Blaine got into the driver seat and pulled out of the parking lot.

"Where are we going, Daddy?" Sophie asked after Kurt had snapped a quick picture of the kids squished together, grinning up at the camera.

"You'll find out soon enough." Kurt said, looking at Blaine giddily. "How long from here?"

"Five minutes." Blaine grinned. "Zachy, if you could go one place in the world, where would it be?"

"I dunno." Zach shrugged.

"Nicky?"

"To an ice cream truck."

Kurt rolled his eyes. "What about you, Sophie baby?"

"To a castle!"

Blaine's grin grew and he quickly elbowed Kurt and coughed, "Camera!"

Kurt turned the recorder on, putting it on all three of the kids.

"Hey, look at that sign up there! What does it say?" Kurt asked.

"WELCOME TO DISNEY WORLD!" Zach shrieked, undoing his seatbelt and pressing his nose to the window as Sophie let out a loud shriek.

"DISNEY DISNEY DISNEY!" Nick screamed, dancing in his seat.

"DISNEY! DISNEY!" Sophie kicked her legs out gleefully.

Kurt laughed, still filming. "Are you guys happy?"

"I'VE NEVER BEEN SO HAPPY IN MY LIFE!" Sophie said, beginning to cry.

"Awww, baby!" Kurt said.

"THIS IS THE BEST DAY EVER!" Zachy squealed, bending down and pressing a kiss to Sophie's cheek.

"WE LOVE DISNEY WORLD!"

"Success." Blaine said, lifting his hand for Kurt to high-five.

"Success." Kurt beamed.


	38. Babies Warning: First Day of School

"I hope you asked off the day because I'm going to be a wreck as soon as we go in the door." Kurt said quietly as he pulled into the Riverdale Country School parking lot. He parked and turned in his seat, watching his five year old twins chatter to each other.

"Don't."

"I'm not." Kurt sniffled.

"Don't." Blaine said, grabbing his hand.

"Their first day of kindergarten." Kurt whispered. "They're like little adults."

"They're still practically toddlers." Blaine reassured him. "They're not like little adults."

"Five is almost a third of the way to being an adult." Kurt said.

"But look at them. They're still chubby and can't even pronounce things properly."

"DADDY!" Zachy cried, throwing his hands into the air.

"Are you boys excited for kindergarten?" Blaine asked, sounding excited. "It's going to be so much fun!"

"Kinda-gah-ten!" Nicky said slowly.

"Kindergarten!" Blaine nodded, reaching back and tickling Nicky's tummy. "My smart boy."

Nicky giggled. "Smart Daddy."

"You little charmer." Blaine laughed and moved to open his door.

"Not yet!" Kurt yelped. "Not yet. Let's sit here. This is a nice family moment, right?"

"Kurt…"

"Can't they be my babies for _five more minutes_?"

"We're already late because you changed their clothes five times… and Sophie had her meltdown when we left her with David." Blaine said gently.

"Yes, but… my babies."

Zachy opened his arms wide and then closed them as if hugging Kurt.

"Aww, my sweet baby." Kurt cooed, unbuckling his seatbelt.

"Don't cry." Blaine whispered as he pushed his door open.

"C'mere, baby." Kurt said, getting Zachy out of his car seat and standing him up. He then crawled in the backseat, freeing Nicky as well. "Now we have to get pictures for grandma and grandpa, uncle Alex and aunt Mia, and uncle Finn and Aunt Rachel."

"And Uncle David and Uncle Wes." Blaine added.

"Do we _have_to?" Nicky whined.

"Yes." Kurt nudged them together and took the camera for Blaine. "I'll take it. You're horrible with cameras."

"This much is true." Blaine nodded. He had ruined several pictures with his lack of photography skills. "Big smiles, boys!"

"Say kindergarten!" Kurt said, giving them a big smile.

"KINDA-GAH-TEN!" They shrieked together and grinned into the camera.

"Good job!" Kurt said, snapping a second picture as the boys hugged each other.

"Okay, Kurt…" Blaine said.

Kurt shot Blaine a look.

"We're half an hour late." Blaine whispered.

"KINDAGAHTEN!" Nicky cheered, clapping his hands happily as a mother led another little boy inside the school building. "Daddy, wanna go innnnn!"

"Okay, okay, we'll go in." Kurt said after taking a deep breath.

"Go in?" Zachy asked, running and hiding behind Blaine.

"You don't want to go in?" Blaine asked, looking down at him.

Zachy shook his head, hugging Blaine's leg. He then whispered, "Wanna stay with Dad and Daddy."

"Aw, but you're a big boy now. Remember?" Blaine asked.

"I'm a baby." Zachy protested. "I'm only five!"

"Nuh uh." Nicky said, running over and grabbing his hand. "We're big boys."

"Daddy, you're staying, right?" Zachy asked, looking at Kurt.

"Oh, baby, Daddy can't stay." Kurt kneeled down. "But you and Nicky will be together."

"Dad's gonna stay, right?" Zachy tilted his head to look at Blaine.

"I'm not allowed to stay. But you liked Miss Becky, remember?" Blaine asked. "She had the pretty hair and the green shirt?"

"I like you more."

"_Blaine…" _Kurt hissed. "Can't we home school them?"

"_Kindagahten!_" Nicky began bouncing up and down.

"I don't wanna go!" Zachy said, tears filling his hazel eyes.

"Honey, it's okay." Blaine reached down and scooped him up. "It's okay, Zachy."

"I don't wanna go, Daddy! It's scary!" Zachy whimpered.

"But Zachy, I'll be with you!" Nicky chirped. "It's okay!"

Kurt scooped Nicky up, hugging him tightly. "My babies are perfect."

"We know." Nicky giggled as Zachy buried his face under Blaine's arm.

"Oh, my love." Blaine cooed, bouncing him and rubbing his back. "It's only for a few hours. It'll be just like when you and Nicky stay with Uncle Wes. Only you won't have to deal with Wes' lunacy."

Zachy sniffled, nuzzling Blaine's neck and silently pleading to not go to school.

"I love you." Blaine said, kissing his mop of dark curls.

"L-Love you." Zachy hiccupped.

"Okay, boys. It's time to start school." Blaine said. "Are we ready?"

"YEAH!" Nicky declared as Zachy tried to cocoon himself in Blaine's arms.

"Is Mr. Zachary ready?" Kurt asked, setting Nicky down and tickling behind Zachy's knee.

"Nuh-uh." Zachy shook his head.

"I put some potato candy in your lunchbox." Kurt whispered, smiling when Zachy's eyes lit up.

"Hey, I didn't know you made potato candy." Blaine gasped as both twins giggled.

"Because you would have eaten it all and blamed it on your dog again." Kurt sighed, ruffling Zachy's curls. "But you can't have the candy if you don't be a big boy and go to kindergarten, alright?"

"Are you sure?" Zachy asked, hiding his face in Blaine's chest and only peeking one eye out at Kurt.

"Yeah, baby. I'm sure." Kurt nodded, rubbing his back. "But you're a big boy too. See Nicky? He's your age and he's excited."

"THEY'VE GOT PUZZLES!" Nicky let out a loud whoop, wedging himself between Kurt and Blaine. "LET'S GO, ZACHY! LET'S GO!"

"I like puzzles." Zachy said, his arms falling from around Blaine's neck.

"Uh oh. I bet they have a lot of puzzles too." Kurt said, drawing Zachy's attention.

"And blocks!" Nicky clapped. "And—And—And trucks! And—And coloring books!"

"Coloring books?" Zachy's head whipped around to look at Blaine.

"I bet they do." Blaine nodded.

"Let's go to kindergarten!" Zachy squealed, running up to the door with Nicky when Blaine sat him down.

"Can I cry yet?" Kurt sniffed a bit, crossing his arms over his chest.

"No. But when we get them signed in and make it back to the car, I might cry with you." Blaine said, grabbing his hand and walking up to the door with him. "School time!"

…

"Do you feel creepy at all?" Blaine asked later that day as they pulled back into the Riverdale parking lot.

"Why would I feel creepy?" Kurt asked, popping a cheesecake bite into his mouth. (Yes. Cheesecake was completely necessary.)

"Because we spent three hours in a coffee shop down the street and then stayed within thirty minutes of the school until, oh, now." Blaine turned off the car and faced Kurt.

"We wanted to—okay, _I _wanted to be close in case they needed us." Kurt said.

"Hey, I was—am worried too." Blaine reassured him, laughing a bit. "How mad do you think Sophie is that we left her alone with David all day?"

Kurt laughed. "Pretty annoyed judging by that phone call we got during lunch."

"God, she is so spoiled." Blaine shook his head, smiling.

"She's not _spoiled_… Okay, she is." Kurt said. "But don't deny that you spoil her the most, Blaine, because you are _horrible_. All she has to do is that little wave or nuzzle you and you're a puddle of goo on the floor."

"But she's so cute." Blaine pouted. "I can't help that she's a Daddy's girl."

"And I thought Melody had you bad. I wasn't ready for this." Kurt teased. His face broke out to a smile when he looked at the time. "Look! It's time to go in and get them!"

"You're not going to cry, are you?" Blaine asked, getting out of the car.

"You were tearing up _in front of them_. At least I held the waterworks for when we reached the hallway." Kurt said, pointing an accusing finger at him.

"But they're in _school_. Soon we'll be teaching them how to read and how to tie a tie and how to drive and fill out a check—." Blaine said quickly.

"Breathe." Kurt instructed, rubbing his arm. "They're five years old, Blaine. Not fifteen."

"One day they'll be fifteen." Blaine said, eyes widening.

"Yes. They will. Just like Sophie will one day be five."

Blaine gasped in horror. "Not my little girl."

"Even your little girl." Kurt nodded, lacing their fingers together and peeking into the classroom when they came to a halt in front of them. Nicky was painting with two boys and Zachy was in the corner with an adorable little girl, seemingly playing house. "Oh my God, look at them. They're not even playing together, Blaine! They've got friends!"

"Awww, that chubby boy in the corner eating glue is cute." Blaine cooed and then he said, in a much more serious voice, "I really hope that's not toxic."

"DADDY!" Nicky dropped his paint brush and ran for them, throwing one arm around each of their legs. "DADDY! DAD! DADDY! DAD!"

"DADDY!" Zachy ran over too, running behind them and doing the exact same as Nick, effectively trapping Kurt and Blaine where they stood—something they did a lot.

"How was school?" Kurt asked excitedly, bending and kissing the top of both of their heads.

"We like school!" They said together as their teacher came over.

"How were they?" Blaine laughed.

"We almost had to call home about this one." The teacher, Miss Becky, said ruffling Zachy's hair.

"But I made him feel better!" Nicky giggled.

"I missed you, Daddy." Zachy pouted, nuzzling Kurt's leg.

"What about me?" Blaine asked, faking a hurt look.

"I missed you, Dad!" Nicky said, grinning.

"I'll see both of you boys tomorrow." Miss Becky said. "Don't forget to bring a toy from home to show everyone."

"I'm going to bring my penguin." Zachy said shyly, hiding behind Kurt's leg.

"I'm gonna bring my sister!"

"Oh my God." Kurt said, shaking his head as the teacher giggled and waved goodbye. "Nicholas, Sophie is not a _toy_."

"Yeah 'cause there's no off button." Nicky nodded very seriously.

"Oh my God." Kurt repeated, holding the door open for the three of them. Nicky and Zachy ran to the car, chattering happily.

"Day one of school successful. Now we just have to get through hearing them talk about their first day without crying." Blaine whispered as they walked towards the twins.

"Not going to happen." Kurt whispered back, opening the car door and crawling in. "C'mon, Nicky. Let's get you all buckled in your seat."

Nicky hopped up and into his car seat. "Daddy, Daddy, Daddy! Do you—Do you remember the big fire truck at the toy store?"

"Uh huh." Kurt said, snapping his seatbelt and then hoisting Zachy into the car as Blaine got in the driver seat. "I sure do."

"THEY HAVE ONE!" Nicky said. "It's got a— a ladder and everything!"

"And we did the ABCs!" Zachy added, nodding eagerly. "But we already knew them so—so—so we gots to help."

"_Got _to help." Blaine corrected.

"_Got _to help." Zachy repeated as Blaine smiled. "And—And Miss Becky says I'm a good teacher, Dad!"

"You'll have to teach me the ABCs!" Blaine said.

"But you already knows them!" Zachy giggled.

"_Know_."

"But you already know that!" Zachy giggled again.

"I think I forgot though." Blaine said.

"ABCDEFG!" Nicky sang.

"HIJKLMNOP!" Zachy said. "Help, Daddy!"

"QRSTUV…" Kurt laughed.

"WXYZ NOW DADDY KNOWS HIS ABCs AND NEXT TIME HE'LL SING WITH… WE!" Nicky clapped excitedly.

"Now I remember. You boys _are _good teachers!" Blaine laughed.

"Tomorrow we'll be better!" Zachy chirped. "I wanna play with the blocks tomorrow, Nicky!"

"And the train!" Nicky said eagerly as Kurt climbed into the passenger seat.

"Think we'll get a word in edgewise the whole way home?" Blaine asked over them.

"Probably not." Kurt laughed and shook his head. "Probably not."


	39. Ch 23 Cut Scene: Potato Candy

Blaine glanced down at Kurt, who was sprawled across the bed asleep, as there was a quiet knock on his door.

"Come in." Blaine called quietly, causing Kurt to rub his nose and roll on his side.

Burt poked his head in, eyes immediately going to Kurt. "How long has he been out?"

"About half an hour." Blaine said, closing his book and eyeing Burt curiously. "Why?"

"Family initiation. Come on, kid." Burt said, grinning and gesturing for Blaine to stand.

"Fam—what?" Blaine asked.

"Are you questioning me?" Burt arched an eyebrow.

"Of course not." Blaine got up quickly and followed Burt from the room.

"Close that door." Burt whispered, motioning his hand towards the doorknob.

Blaine did so and then padded downstairs. "You're not going to kill me, right?"

"Not today." Burt chuckled, nudging Blaine in front of him. "Kitchen."

"Kurt told me I couldn't go in there." Blaine said warily. Then again, he thought to himself, this was Kurt's father. No matter who he listened to, it was a lose-lose situation.

"Kurt has been baking all day and will be dead to the world for nine hours." Burt said gruffly. "I'm his father, and _I'm _telling you to go in there. Who would you rather disobey, kiddo?"

"Do you really have a flamethrower?" Blaine asked, because really it was a tie breaker. He didn't get an answer, though. Instead, Burt just nudged him into the room.

"Burt, no! It's one thing to get yourself into trouble, but Blaine?" Carole gasped from the sink where she was finishing up some dishes.

"What?" Burt grunted. "Like Kurt will find out."

"Kurt always finds out." Blaine and Carole said together. It was true. Anytime anyone in the house tried to keep something from Kurt, the boy would find out. It was like a sixth sense.

"How much trouble will I get int—_are you getting into the potato candy_?!" Blaine whispered excitedly, hazel eyes lighting up.

"Don't let him pull you into this." Carole warned. "Kurt's going to murder you both. Blaine, turn around and go back to bed."

"He's not going to notice a few pieces missing." Burt said reasonably, quietly setting the aluminum foil that had covered the candy to the side.

"A few pieces?" Carole echoed. "You do realize that you and Blaine went through an entire plate in one sitting the last time Kurt made it? Don't fake that innocent look, Blaine! You know you did!"

"So? The candy's good." Burt protested in Blaine's defense, pushing it towards him.

"Do you really want to put yourself in the position of facing Kurt's wrath?" Carole asked.

"For potato candy?" Blaine asked, grabbing a particularly large piece and stuffing it in his mouth. "I'd do anything."

"I'll take no part in this." Carole said, trying very hard not to look at the piece Burt held out for her. "Burt, honestly…"

"It's tradition, Carole." Burt said gruffly. "I've been doing this since the kid could make it. He expects it."

"Blaine, two more pieces already?" Carole asked, jaw dropping.

"It's really good." Blaine said, covering his mouth. "I can't help it!"

"Oh, alright!" Carole took the piece of potato candy and bit into it. "That _is_really good!"

"Take another one, Blaine." Burt said, pushing the plate towards Blaine again as he sneaked another piece.

"Blaine, you don't have to listen to him. He just doesn't want to incriminate himself alone." Carole said after finishing her piece. "See? I ate one and now I'm going upstairs."

"More for us to eat." Burt shrugged, sending Blaine a grin.

"Night, Carole." Blaine said cheerfully as she headed upstairs.

"When you're caught, Blaine, don't go and pout those lips at me." Was all Carole said before retreating upstairs, shaking her head as she went.

"So… how much trouble will I get into realistically?"

"Depends on how much we eat." Burt shrugged, grabbing another piece.

"Lots in that case." Blaine sighed.

"But it's for a good cause. _Potato candy_." Burt pointed.

"I don't know how I got through life without it." Blaine said.

"Want some milk, bud?" Burt asked, chuckling.

"Oh my God, yes." Blaine said, getting two glasses while Burt got the jug of milk.

When both were poured Burt clanged their glasses together. "Well, it's official. Welcome to the family, kid."

Blaine beamed. Maybe getting into trouble would be worth it.


	40. Ch 36 Cut Scene: Blaine Gets Phone

"Hi, uhm… I was in a wreck and… my phone…"

"What would that name on that be?" A fireman asked, opening a drawer.

"Blaine. Blaine Anderson." Blaine said.

"It's not in here." The man said after several seconds. "Let me go ask someone."

Blaine nodded and looked at Kurt. Kurt rubbed his hand in small circles on Blaine's lower back, giving him a small smile.

"They've got it. He'll be right with you." The fireman said, coming back out and going to the other end of the room. "You can sit if you'd like."

"Want to?" Kurt asked.

"No, I'm good." Blaine said quietly, waiting patiently. He heard some laughing and then a man appeared.

"I was wondering when we'd be seeing you. I tried to take it down to the hospital but you'd already been discharged. Most twenty year olds would have been in for it that day." The man said, coming up.

It took Blaine a second before he realized that this was the fireman that had been in the car with him, talking to him and keeping him calm. Craig, or C. PEARSONS as his badge read.

"I'm glad to see you up and walking even if it's on crutches. How are you doing?" The man, Craig, asked.

"I'm doing better. I just… Thank you for… for _everything_." Blaine said, feeling a rush of gratitude towards the man.

"It's no problem." Craig held out Blaine's phone.

Blaine took it and pocketed it, balancing on his crutches. "No, really. You were so nice. I was scared but… but you made me feel safe. You were nice and you stayed with me even when they were moving the car out and cutting into it… Which sounds like it could have put you in danger. So, thank you. Really. I _really _and truly appreciate what you did."

"Well thank you, Blaine." The fireman smiled. "This must be Kurt?"

"Hello." Kurt said, waving.

"He kept asking for you." Craig explained., shrugging. "I figured it was something like that, but wasn't too sure. It's hard to tell these days sometimes, which is great and all. How bad was the damage?"

"The car?" Blaine asked.

"Oh, that's junk yard scraps. Once they get the Jaws of Life on 'em, there's no chance for 'em." Craig laughed. "I meant _you_."

"I've got a broken leg and a concussion. My wrist is sprained but it's feeling a lot better." Blaine answered, despite the fact that earlier he'd said it still hurt.

"You were extremely lucky. I've seen cars look better than that and people come out much worse."

"Thank you for helping him." Kurt said quietly.

"It's no prob at all." Craig smiled. "And hey, who doesn't like having to get a new car? Sometimes I wish someone would run into me so I could get one."

The fireman at the desk snorted loudly and shook his head. "You don't have enough money to get a new one, Pearsons."

"If they hit me hard enough and I end up in the hospital, I can make them." Craig shrugged. "But really, boys, it's no problem. I should really be thanking you, Blaine. You were handling yourself very well. I've had people older than you kick at me for just asking their name."

"Are you serious?" Kurt asked.

"You'd be surprised what nerves can do to a person." Craig responded. "Someone in a team in Georgia had their finger bitten off."

"You're joking." The man at the desk turned around.

"Get on your computer and look it up, Gabe. All you're doing is Facebooking anyway." Craig pointed at the screen.

"Get a boy thank you and all of a sudden you get a big head." The man teased, turning back around. "This is why we keep you locked up in that office."

Craig just rolled his eyes and shook his head. "Sometimes they really do, you know? I've had to climb out the window once or twice. It's okay. Good practice, I hear."

Blaine and Kurt laughed as an alarm went off.

"Gotta go, boys. Take care, Blaine Anderson!" Craig said, turning and heading for the large fire truck.

"Thanks." Blaine said to the guy at the desk, waving before walking towards the real exit. He smiled his thanks when Kurt help the door open.

"I think I know why you liked him so much." Kurt nudged him.

"Huh?"

"I'm sure it had absolutely nothing to do with the fact that he was absolutely gorgeous." Kurt snorted loudly.

"Was he?"

"Dark hair, blue eyes, dark skin. He was dreamy. That's why you like him. You've got a crush on him."

"I couldn't even really see him in the car and any attraction was the last thing on my mind." Blaine protested.

"So there was some?" Kurt teased, nudging him again.

"_No!_" Blaine said, blushing. "I wasn't even paying attention to his face, alright?"

"So were you imagining his arms under the big coat?"

Blaine scowled, walking on.

"Or about him all sweaty after working out?"

"_Asshole_." Blaine called.

"Were you trying to imagine him on a calendar?"

"_Jerk_."

"Oh, you were thinking about jerking off? Or him—."

"I liked you better when you refused to talk about anything sexual." Blaine grumbled as he reached the car. "Can we just go home? I want to see my kitten."

Kurt opened the door for him. "So there _were _sexual feelings. It's okay. He's a fireman. I can deal with that."

Blaine groaned loudly. "_Kurt_."

"Were these feelings in the car or just now? When you saw those pretty blue eyes?" Kurt smirked.

"You're such a brat."

"You know, he pulls little brats out of burning buildings. He's a hero. Do I need to be worried?" Kurt asked, leaning closer to him.

"If you don't shut up, maybe. But not because I'll run off with him. I'll just lock you in the trunk."

"Good luck getting me back there." Kurt giggled, glancing at his leg.

"What in the world did I get myself into kissing you at Dalton that March?" Blaine asked, shaking his head.

"This." Kurt said, kissing him.

"I can live with that." Blaine smiled and kissed him back.

"You better not be thinking of the fireman."

"_Kurt_!"


	41. Ch 37 Cut Scene: Too Much Food

"I'm gonna be sick. I'm really going to be sick." Blaine moaned, rolling onto his stomach on the living room floor.

"Don't be such a baby. I told you that you were eating too much but you didn't listen." Kurt sighed as he joined Blaine on the floor, although he did put his hand on Blaine's back and rub it in circles.

"Mmmh." Blaine said, burying his face in the crook of his arm.

"BAY BAY!" Melody shrieked, bending over him and gently petting his back. "Bay doggy."

Blaine rolled over and growled in her direction.

"EEE!" Melody ran, wrapping her tiny arms around Finn's leg as he came in.

"Why's Blaine on the floor?" Finn asked, scooping Melody up.

"Partially induced food coma. Stomach ache. The usual." Kurt rolled his eyes, hand now rubbing Blaine's arm.

"I told you to go easy on the turkey." Burt chuckled as he walked through. "Been there, done that. You'll feel better in the morning."

"So far away." Blaine groaned, nuzzling Kurt's leg.

"You boys going to be able to get Melody to bed?" Burt questioned, going over and ruffling Melody's hair.

"Daddydaddydaddy!" Melody cooed.

"I think they can handle it." Finn said.

"Gee, thanks." Kurt rolled his eyes. "Yes. I can take care of a sick Blaine and getting Melody to bed on my own."

"Thanks, kiddo." Burt said, patting Kurt's shoulder and heading upstairs.

"That was sarcasm." Blaine informed Finn when Burt was out of earshot.

"Shut up." Kurt laughed.

"Why did I eat so much turkey? Why do I want to eat _more_? Is this normal?" Blaine forced himself into a sitting position. "Can I have more?"

"Tomorrow." Kurt said, scooting close to Blaine so Blaine could lean against him.

"My tummy hurts."

"Yes. You've said that for about an hour now."

"Well I would have said it longer but I didn't want your grandmother to feel bad."

"She wouldn't feel bad. You did it to yourself." Kurt snorted and stood.

"Don't leave meeee." Blaine whined.

"I'm getting you some 7Up to hopefully settle your stomach a bit." Kurt said. "Finn, make sure he doesn't kill himself."

"Bring potato candy!" Blaine called after Kurt as he left.

"No, Blaine. _No_." Kurt sighed and disappeared.

"Kurt's mean." Blaine pouted, collapsing into a lying position again. "Do you think it's possible to die from eating too much turkey?"

"Anything's possible, dude." Finn shrugged before pretending to eat Melody's fingers.

"Uh oh. Finn's a zombie!" Blaine cried, flailing his arms. "Aaaah!"

Melody shrieked and giggled, trying to pull her hand back.

"No, no, no." Blaine crawled over as Finn sat on the floor with Melody. "I'll save you, Melody. I'll save you!"

"No he won't!" Finn cackled, or at least tried. "Nobody can save you."

Melody looked between the two of them before beginning to giggle again.

"I can." Kurt said, letting out a somewhat irritated sigh as he scooped Melody out of Finn's arms. "Blaine, your 7-Up is on the coffee table. And I'd like to personally thank you both for being jerks and getting her all excited when I have to get her to bed."

"Anything to make your life easier." Blaine grinned.

"You know what? I don't want to hear another word about your tummy ache." Kurt said, expression serious. "Maybe you can tell your new best friend Finn. If your stomach hurt so much, you wouldn't be able to rile up the baby."

"But the baby is cute when she's riled up and my stomach _does _hurt that much." Blaine pouted. "Are you coming back?"

"If she ever calms down enough to sleep." Kurt shot Blaine and Finn both a look.

"If you didn't have to put her to bed, you would have played with her too." Finn pointed out.

"Shut up, Finn." Kurt snapped. "Drink that so your stomach will feel better."

_It's true, though, _he thought to himself as he towards the stairs.

"_I don't want to hear another word about your tummy _and then he acts like your mom trying to get you to drink 7-Up." Finn snorted loudly.

"Don't make fun of him. He hears everything. If I agree, I get no cuddles and will probably have to sleep on the floor. If I don't agree, he spends the whole night asking why I didn't agree." Blaine whined, voice muffled by what Kurt assumed was probably his arm.

"I don't know what I'm going to do with those two, Mellie." Kurt said as he took Melody into the guest room where her crib had been set up.

Melody reached up, grabbing a handful of his hair.

"No, no, no." Kurt said very firmly. "We only do that to Blaine's hair, okay? We've been over this many times. It takes me a lot longer to do my hair and—Fine."

Melody giggled, gently tugging at him hair. "Kur!"

"Mellie!" Kurt cooed, kissing her cheek and easing her into the crib.

Melody wiggled around for a few seconds before going still and staring at him with big eyes.

"I'll be back really soon with Blaine." Kurt promised before edging towards the door and turning the light off.

Why had they decided it was a good idea to have Melody sleep in their room?

Wait.

It couldn't.

_No_.

"I can't believe they're having sex in my grandparents' house!" Kurt said out loud as he walked back into the living room.

"What was that?" Blaine asked from his new spot on the couch, looking confused.

"My parents put Melody in the room we are staying in." Kurt said.

"But why would they—_oh, ew_." Blaine scrunched his nose up.

"Dude, are you serious?" Finn asked, looking disgusted.

"Kurt…" Blaine raised his finger. "You do know that when we stay in Lima, we kind of do the same thi—."

"No. It's not the same thing." Kurt interrupted. "That's not the same thing at all."

"If you say so." Blaine stood. "Can we go get into bed and you rub my tummy?"

"You're worse than Kreacher." Kurt teased, grabbing Blaine's hand. "C'mon, you big baby."

"But are they for real doing that?" Finn asked. "And where am I sleeping again?"

"The other bed in the guest room we're staying in." Kurt answered.

"Guess we aren't doing the dirty like your dad and Caro—OW! Kurt, that is_harassment_!" Blaine rubbed his arm.

"You deserved it." Kurt huffed.

"Now my arm and my tummy hurts." Blaine pouted.

"And don't you dare think you're kissing either of them when I'm in the same bedroom as you." Finn muttered, following them into the room and then settling on one of the beds.

"Well this trip has been a success so far." Blaine chirped, sitting on the other bed and watching Kurt cover Melody with a blanket. "Apart from the fact that my stomach will eventually explode one of two ways and honestly, I'm not sure which I'd prefer at this point."

"That is disgusting." Kurt stared at Blaine as if he'd grown a head.

"Yes, but you love me."

"That's a bit debatable tonight." Kurt said, only mostly joking.

"I forgot my Sprite." Blaine suddenly pouted.

"You better love me." Kurt sighed before leaving the room to retrieve Blaine's drink. It was a damn good thing Blaine was so adorable.


	42. Cut Scene: Cupcakes

"Don't leave!"

"What? I've got class, Kurt. I—." Blaine sputtered.

"No! You always get there half an hour early. Just wait a little longer. I'm—thank you!—I'm on my way! Don't leave!" Kurt said, voice rather frenzied, and hung up.

"Love you too, dear." Blaine muttered, stared at his phone for several seconds, and then dropped his backpack. He'd been on the way to the front door, all ready to leave, when his phone had rung. That in itself was weird because Kurt had glee club for one and for two he never called Blaine right after school. Text, yes. But he never called because he was too busy chatting with other people—namely Mercedes and Rachel. Why was Kurt on his way and why had he been so frantic?

Not three minutes later he heard a car door slam, the front door slam, and running up the stairs. He arched his eyebrow as Kurt very calmly walked in, as if he hadn't been rushing at all, with his hands behind his back. "Hey." The younger boy said in a casual voice.

"Well hello?" Blaine couldn't disguise the laughter and confusion in his voice.

"Hi." Kurt said again, grinning.

"What? Did I forget to gel the back piece of my hair again?" Blaine turned and went to the mirror. "What? I don't see anything wr—oooh." He turned around to see Kurt holding out a cupcake. A very delicious looking cupcake. A very delicious looking chocolate cupcake with loads of icing. He felt like he became a big puddle of goo and he slowly smiled. Kurt Hummel was amazing. Absolutely amazing. Surprising him with chocolate cupcakes? Could there be anyone better than that? No. There couldn't. "You skipped glee club… and drove to a bakery and home like a maniac… to bring me a cupcake?"

Kurt nodded, eyes very bright and looking just as pleased with himself as Blaine has looked when he'd given Kurt their puppy. "I wanted to surprise you. I know you like things that contribute to your premature death." He extended his hand more and said in a sing-song voice, "Want it?"

"There are a few things I want right now." Blaine said without thinking, and then his eyes widened.

"Unfortunately you have class soon and we don't have enough time for _that_, Mr. Anderson, and you refuse to do that if anyone else is home so we can't tonight. But I think you _do_ have time to eat this delicious cupcake before you leave." The younger boy, looking very smug, stepped forward and placed it in his hand.

Blaine had not moved forward to take it, too stunned to react properly, both because of the fact that Kurt had rushed home with a cupcake and that he'd actually said that out loud. While he would have much rather do some very un-dapper things to his boyfriend, he settled for biting into his cupcake and saying, mouth full, "Wasifer?"

Kurt laughed loudly. "Mr. Schue and Miss Pillsbury apparently are going to some vest convention. Well, I think Sam was joking about it being a _vest_collection. Nevertheless, New Directions isn't meeting tonight and I know you like clogging your arteries. And David ended up eating half your birthday cake yesterday at the party, so I thought I'd remind you why you love me."

"Dunitemine." Blaine said after taking another bite of his cupcake.

"Was that 'don't remind me' or 'I don't need reminding'?" Kurt questioned. "You haven't even swallowed what in your mouth, Blaine! You're going to suffocate! Your stomach is like a black hole!"

Blaine swallowed and said, "I don't need reminding why I love you… but also, now that you mention it, don't remind me. That cake was so good. I don't know why he felt the need to finish _all_ of it. _This is the best cupcake I've ever had in my entire like. Like, ever."_

His boyfriend kissed his cheek. "I'll make you another cake tonight. Well, maybe tomorrow. Finn's not home tonight and I don't see Dad and Carole eating your entire cake."

"Fanks." Blaine said through another mouthful. "Fishuue."

"I know it's huge. That's why I got a bigger one. I knew you'd like it."

Blaine didn't know whether he should worry that Kurt understood him through a mouthful of food or not. On the one hand, it was very cute that Kurt understood him. On the other hand, did Blaine really talk with his mouth full_that_ often? His family would have had a heart attack if they knew he spoke with his mouth full. He swallowed his last bite and said, "Thank you for my delicious cupcake."

"You are very welcome." Kurt laughed and wiped his mouth with a napkin. "Now to go class and talk about adverbs, character analysis', and whatnot."

Right. School. School always seemed to be in the way of Blaine's life. He had gone from spending almost every waking moment, bar three hours two nights a week, with Kurt to spending nights only with him. Blaine had really become attached to his younger boyfriend and often found himself wandering the hallways in the middle of the day looking for the smaller boy. He sighed softly and picked up his backpack, hating that he had to leave him. "Maybe I can just skip today?"

"No, no, no. You already skipped that day last week to go to my doctor's appointment with me. I wish you could though." Kurt kissed his cheek and added very casually, "It's Friday. Maybe we can go and see a movie with Mercedes? You could invite someone too. You know… Wes. Or David."

"I haven't seen Mercedes in a while. How is she?"

"You know what? Call Wes and David. Maybe they can come up for a movie. You can ask her yourself there." Kurt prompted.

"Wes is in LA again. I don't think he can come down this way for a movie." He didn't notice the look of triumph on Kurt's face. "But I could call David and see if he wants to."

"Great! You… you go do that and go to school and I'll call Mercedes!"

"Kurt, you're up to something. Generally when you're up to something, you come back from the mall having spent enough money to give your dad another heart attack." Blaine said suspiciously.

"I don't know what you speak of, Blaine." Kurt grabbed the napkin and wiped his cheek again, his own eyes meeting Blaine's. "You got the chocolate everywhere."

"It's 'cause I'm totally cute." Blaine leaned forward and kissed Kurt's cheek. "Whatever it is you've got planned, I don't want to know. But as long as _you_buy me Reese's Pieces, okay."

"You don't even like peanut butter!" Kurt called as Blaine left the room.

"But I like Reese's Pieces! Bye! Love you! Thank you for contributing to my premature death!"

And then Blaine was gone.


	43. Klaine Week: Anniversary

**Note: A lot of the drabbles of them announcing babies/discussing babies were wrote before I had an actual timeline, so don't hold me to these facts (and any others that aren't in the published story). Some facts will remain the same but others have evolved!**

"Well don't you clean up nicely." Blaine smirked as he came into his bedroom. "I haven't seen you without rumpled hair and wrinkled clothes in five days. Line done?"

"Done." Kurt grinned. "Just in time for tonight."

"Mmmh, tonight?" Blaine asked, arching his eyebrow suggestively.

"There will be sex. I'm sure." Kurt rolled his eyes and approached him, grabbing his hand. "But first we have to have dinner which is almost done."

"We aren't going out?" Blaine asked, surprised.

"Mmh, no." Kurt shook his head. "I thought it would be a little more personal if we stayed in. I also ordered When Harry Met Sally on Pay Per View."

"Aww." Blaine got a silly smile on his face, kissing Kurt's cheek. "Happy first anniversary, Kurt."

"And you too." Kurt grinned and pressed his lips to Blaine's. "I love you."

"I love you too a bit." Blaine kissed Kurt's cheek again. "Okay, what's for dinner? I'm starving."

Kurt laughed and took his hand again, leading him through their small but cozy apartment and into their kitchen. "Baked chicken, mashed potatoes, green beans, and _potato candy_."

"I am so glad we got married near Christmas and I was able to talk you into starting the making of potato candy early this year." Blaine said happily, sitting at the table.

"I think a winter wedding date was your plan for extra potato candy." Kurt teased, making two plates. "How was work?"

"They're tanking on that big case. If they don't get something, they're done for. They had us searching that man's personal and business office for _hours_. I feel like I can't even see straight." Blaine said. "How did handing the line over go?"

"Great. They really liked the spring collection." Kurt sat down. "Travis seems to think it'll bring in three times the fall one did."

"Hmm. Too bad we're already married. We need something else to blow money off on." Blaine teased, leaning over and kissing Kurt. "Maybe we should renew our vows in Italy. Stop by and see Danny and Alex. He owes us a stay anyway."

"Mmmh. I don't think the office will appreciate that."

"You're right. I'm lucky to get Christmas Eve through New Year's off with how this case is going." Blaine nodded.

"No more stressful thinking. Work is done for the night." Kurt said. "We are going to eat and then enjoy each other's company."

"You're right. Today is about us—what's left of it, that is." Blaine nodded. "And this food is _amazing_."

"There will be left overs for you to take to work tomorrow for your lunch." Kurt reassured him.

"I love the weeks after you send in a line… I eat really good during them." Blaine laughed. "What did I do to deserve you?"

"Clearly you sold your soul to the devil." Kurt teased as Blaine scarfed his food down. "What's the rush?"

"Dinner then cuddle with movie." Blaine said, covering his mouth which was full.

"Swallow and then talk." Kurt laughed. "Swallow and then talk."

"Mmkay." Blaine swallowed his food and stood. "C'mon!"

"Alright, alright!" Kurt swallowed the last bite of his food. "But hold off on the movie, okay?"

"You don't want to watch our movie?" Blaine pouted.

"I do." Kurt said quickly. "But I want to talk to you about something."

"What? Is everything okay?"

"Perfect. Everything is perfect." Kurt kissed him quickly.

"Good." Blaine let out a relieved sigh, leading Kurt to the couch and sitting down. "What do you want to talk about?"

"When you moved out here, we agreed on getting an apartment and staying in the city until we were married and wanted kids." Kurt said slowly. "Compromise, right? This was close to both of our jobs and it fits as long as it's just us, so you're okay with it… but when we have kids, we want to move into a house up in northern New York?"

"Yes…" Blaine said.

Kurt reached over, pulling a folder off of their end table and handing it to Blaine.

"What's this?" Blaine asked.

"Open it." Kurt said, scooting as close as possible.

Blaine did, looking confused.

"The right side is all houses that are for sale in good neighborhoods up north. I did extensive research. On the left is a lot of information for if we want to build a house. Numbers, contractors…"

"Kurt…" Blaine said slowly.

"I know we've talked about looking into moving so we can have a family, but we've been so busy that we haven't had time to really look into it. We're ready. I know think, I _know _we are." Kurt said, voice soft. "We've had our year of marital bliss and it's been great, but… but…"

"We're going to have babies." Blaine said, hazel eyes wide. "You're… We're…"

"Yes." Kurt nodded, grabbing his hand and squeezing. "We're going to get a house and have babies."

"Oh my God!" Blaine cried, throwing his arms around Kurt and pulling him close. "Oh my God, oh my God. We're going to have babies!"

"Yes!" Kurt laughed, hugging him tightly and kissing the side of his face. "You and I are going to have babies!"

"I'm so unbelievably _happy _right now. Insanely nervous, but _happy_." Blaine breathed.

"A house is just the first step." Kurt said gently. "We'll need to discuss buying versus building, make a pros and cons list for both… What agency we'll use to find a surrogate, who will be the biological father first… but this is a good first step in the right direction. We'll just take it one step at a time. Maybe by the time our second anniversary comes, we'll have a baby on the way."

"I think I might cry." Blaine said


	44. Klaine Week: Kiddie Klaine

"I like your jacket!"

Seven year old Blaine Anderson looked down at his little navy blazer, unable to remember what he was wearing.

"But that girl that you were singing with has an ugly dress." The slightly smaller boy continued, not even waiting for a response.

"Yellow is a dumb color. I like blue. I picked out this jacket myself." Blaine said, standing a little straighter. "Thank you very much for liking it!"

"Are you lost, sweetheart?" A young woman who was holding the other little boy's hand asked as she bent down.

"No ma'am. My big brother Alex is getting me popcorn." Blaine said. "He told me not to move or talk to strangers, but you're nice. You are nice, right?"

The woman laughed a bit, looking around. "How old is your brother?"

"I dunno like twenty or something." Blaine shrugged and then looked at the boy. "I like your scarf."

"My daddy bought it for me." The boy said, smiling brightly.

"My mommy says that my jacket makes me look all growed up." Blaine said. "My daddy wears jackets like these to work sometimes. But I don't like the bow mommy made me wear with it. It's dumb and tight."

"I don't think they're dumb." The boy said, looking shocked. "I have lots of bow ties!"

"Oh… What's your name?" Blaine asked, tilting his head to the side.

"Kurt Elijah Hummel. My daddy's name is Burt and my mommy's name is Elizabeth." The boy, Kurt, said.

"That's neat! I'm—."

"There you are! Don't. Run. Off. It's very busy here and someone might take you!" A woman snapped, grabbing Blaine's hand.

"But Alex is bringing me popcorn!" Blaine protested as he was dragged away. He turned waving at Kurt. "Bye, Kurt!"

"Bye bye!" Kurt called, waving as Blaine was led off. When he could no longer see Blaine, he turned to his mommy. "Mommy, he didn't tell me his name."

"Well maybe he'll sing again tonight and they'll introduce him." His mother said, scooping him up and kissing his cheek. "Now let's go find daddy, grammy, and grandpa."

"Okay but we have to see if he sings again, mommy. I want to know his name! He was nice and I liked him!"

"I promise we'll stay to see if he sings again." His mother promised. "Let's go tell Daddy about your new friend!"


	45. Klaine Week: Missing Moments

"Okay, okay, okay." Kurt panted, pushing Blaine away gently.

"What?"

"As much as I _love _kissing you…"

"Then why stop?" Blaine asked, leaning forward.

"What are we?" Kurt asked, pulling back.

"W-What?" Blaine said, trying to catch his breath.

"We've spent the last three days kissing a lot but… we haven't talked about _it_." Kurt pointed out.

"Oh! Oh, right, yeah. Talking. About it. We should—we should definitely talk about it. Let's talk." Blaine nodded.

"In a minute." Kurt said, pulling Blaine towards him and into another kiss.

"Or five." Blaine mumbled into his lips, hands resting on Kurt's waist.

"Definitely no more than ten."

…

"It's been an hour." Blaine moaned, pulling away.

"But somewhere it is still five, so it's only been like one minute if we look at it that way." Kurt argued.

"You were the one who wanted to talk about it, though. We should—we should talk about it. Right?"

"Talking is vastly overrated." Kurt said, causing Blaine to let out an adorable laugh and smile which in turn led to Kurt's heart fluttering more than it already was. Truth be told, it really hadn't stopped doing that since their first kiss.

"If I ask you to be my boyfriend, Kurt, will you say yes?" Blaine asked, still slightly breathless from all of their kissing.

"I might." Kurt said, giving Blaine the same impish smile that had been on his face before their second kiss.

"Mmh, I think you will." Blaine smiled.

"You're awfully confident, Blaine Anderson." Kurt smirked.

"Hmm… Will you be my boyfriend?" Blaine asked, kissing Kurt's cheek in a positively adorable way.

"I'd have to say yes considering we've made out nonstop for three days." Kurt laughed. "Which makes us unofficial boyfriends, really."

"Will you be my _official_ boyfriend?" Blaine grinned.

"I would _love_ to be your official boyfriend." Kurt said, leaning forward and kissing him.

"Wait wait wait. Question before the whole making out thing—which is totally awesome, by the way." Blaine interrupted, pulling back.

"Okay. What?" Kurt asked as he laughed, hand midway to Blaine's face.

"Can we not make it Facebook Official until after regionals?" Blaine asked.

"Don't want Wes to win that bet, huh?" Kurt asked, kissing him

"You know me too well." Blaine smiled into his lips before kissing back.


	46. Ch 36 Cut Scene: Kurt and Alex Talk

"Is he asleep?" Alex asked as Kurt came into the kitchen.

"Finally." Kurt said, pouring himself a cup of coffee and sitting across from Alex. "His erratic sleeping patterns are worrying me."

"The doctor said it was a combination of the medicine and concussion, but he's fine." Alex said reassuringly. "They wouldn't have said it otherwise."

"It's hard not to worry about him." Kurt admitted. "He's downright pitiful when he doesn't feel good, so this is like torture for him."

"He'll be okay." Alex said again. "Do you know what you all will do when school starts? Where do you go again?"

"CCAD. Fashion design." Kurt said. "I don't know what we'll do. David, Wes, and I are going to try to get our schedules so we can get all the days covered, but we're not having much luck. Carole would but she works Monday through Friday. We'll figure something out, though. He's going to email his adviser within the week. I told him not to worry about it right now."

"That's good. He doesn't need to worry about anything right now." Alex sighed. "Kurt… thanks for being here for him. I can tell how much you two love each other. I'm glad he has you."

Kurt smiled a bit. "I'm glad I have him too. He's helped me more than I've helped him. We were best friends before we started dating… he helped me through a lot."

"You help each other."

"Yeah." Kurt nodded. "We help each other."

"Can I… just… what _happened_?" Alex asked. "I mean, I left for Italy when he was a toddler. I would come home every few Christmases and he just said nothing to me. I always thought that it was because my parents had told him I was a bad influence or whatever… but… now I keep thinking back and I'm so angry that I couldn't see what it really was. I should have known they were being mean to him even if I didn't know he was gay at the time. I had no idea Blaine was gay until _right _before I met you."

"He came out when he was twelve and your dad took it really bad. They all did, but your dad… was really hard on him." Kurt said hesitantly. "I really feel like you should ask him, though."

"But what got to the point of them making him leave for college?"

"… He chose to go to UK himself to get away from _them_." Kurt said, shocked that Alex didn't know that. "He hasn't really lived with them since he was fifteen or sixteen… From what I understand, he alternated between David and Wes' house over the breaks for the most part after that. By the time I met him when he was almost eighteen, he was only occasionally meeting your mom at a public place for brunch."

"So he went to a private school in the same city that they live in, yet he still lived at Dalton?" Alex asked.

"Yeah."

"But what made it so bad? I mean…"

"I think you should ask him." Kurt repeated. "This is kind of getting into territory that I don't feel comfortable talking about without his permission."

"I mean, it's not like they sent him to those awful camps or anything, right? They just were not accepting?"

Kurt stared at Alex, expression unreadable.

"Not that being unaccepting isn't bad." Alex said quickly. "But it didn't go farther than that, right?"

Kurt blinked a few times.

Alex's eyes widened. "They didn't."

Kurt pursed his lips together.

"No. Mom would never let Dad do _that_." Alex said, shaking his head. "Please, tell me I'm making stuff up in my head right now."

"Four summers." Kurt said softly.

"They are shitty parents. I'll give them that. But they aren't _that_ bad." Alex said, clenching his fist. "No way."

"I really hope that you don't lose interest in him or turn out like your family." Kurt swallowed. "Because he can't take getting closer to you and being throw aside like he's trash again. David, Wes, and I are trying _so hard_ to make up for what he doesn't have… They've been trying since before Blaine and I ever met. But if you throw him aside, all of that will go out the window. He's made a _lot _of progress."

"I can't believe I _left _him and this happened." Alex said. "How did I not stop this from happening?"

"You didn't know… Blaine and I had been dating for months before he even told _me_. I had to beg it out of him, too."

"But if I'd been closer to him, he could have—."

"You couldn't have done anything. David and Wes tried to get him out of there for two years before it finally happened." Kurt said. "But you can help now. It means a lot to him that you came even if he hasn't come out and said it."

"I'm going to visit more." Alex said. "And I'm going to send more money. Whatever you two need, I want you to tell me. It's covered."

"You don't have to make up for it with money. In fact, Blaine pretty much hates money." Kurt said. "Can you just… try to get to know him more? Ask_him_ these questions? You're his big brother. Even if he doesn't at first, he'll eventually start to answer them."

"Okay…" Alex nodded. "I just… How does he not hate me?"

"I don't think there's any more room for hatred. Your grandmother and parents have pretty much used it all up." Kurt said. "I think we should get off of this topic, though."

"Okay. That's probably wisest." Alex said.

"I can tell you other stuff, though." Kurt said. "He's been begging for a kitten and I'm going to get him one soon as a surprise. He loves potato candy and Christmas now that he's had real ones. He gets ridiculously happy anytime you tell him a Danny story, no matter how trivial it is. Carole says he's really just a big kid and it's true… He's funny and he's sweet. He's everything… even if his taste in music can be questionable and if he insists on wearing jeans and t-shirts half the time—we're working on that, though. He is just… everything."

"He listens to Katy Perry, doesn't he?" Alex laughed a bit.

"Oh my God,_ he loves _her. I think he'd marry her if given the chance." Kurt said very seriously. "He's got an amazing singing voice. He was the lead soloist for the Dalton Warblers when we met… He serenaded me with Teenage Dream."

Alex laughed loudly. "Charmer too, then?"

"Oh, I'd say so." Kurt laughed also, smiling as he thought back to the day. "And he's apparently really good at soccer."

"I knew he'd been recruited. Mom said that much." Alex nodded.

"He's always reading books on his Nook that my parents got him." Kurt said. "I don't know. There's so much to say about him. He's perfect. He really and truly is."

"I'm not going to let him down again, Kurt. I promise." Alex vowed. "I really will visit more. I'll try to get to know him more. I… I want to get to know him."

"He wants to get to know you too." Kurt said. "And he could definitely use a big brother."


	47. AU: Lady and the Tramp

**Birthday drabble: Klaine Disney style. It's been long enough that I hope she won't mind I post it!**

Kurt walked through the streets of downtown Westerville with Blaine on their first date, mind racing and hardly able to believe that he was _here_. With _Blaine_. On a _date_. He was so excited that he didn't even trust himself to talk. What if his words came out a jumbled mess and he looked like a crazy person?

"Where do you want to eat?" Blaine asked, walking close to him but still too shy to just _grab _his hand. Never mind that they'd already shared more than one rather passionate kiss.

"I don't know." Kurt answered. _Good job, Kurt. That sounded half sane._ "What do you want?"

"Italian sounds good." Blaine said after several seconds of silence. He then added for good measure, "And it's not fast food."

Kurt rolled his eyes and shook his head, smiling. "Do you know of any good Italian places?"

"There aren't any good ones in Westerville…" Blaine frowned, and then his hazel eyes lit up. "But I have an idea."

"What?"

"Wes makes the _best _spaghetti." Blaine said, whipping out his phone. "It's a very special place for a very special occasion."

_He thinks our first date is a special occasion_, Kurt thought to himself giddily as they made their way back to Blaine's car. Was it a little weird to have the first date at a friend's house? Maybe. But when had there been anything normal about Blaine and Kurt's then friendship and now relationship?

They pulled up outside of a gorgeous house not too long later and Kurt began making his way to the front door but Blaine grabbed his hand—_grabbed his hand!_

"No; this way. I have my own private entrance." Blaine said, winking when Kurt looked into his eyes.

_It's seriously like he walked out of a Disney movie. This is ridiculous_, Kurt thought to himself, following Blaine behind the house.

"Wait here." Blaine said, coming to a stop a few feet from the back door. He hesitantly let go of Kurt's hand, actually looking down at it almost longingly, and then went to knock on the door.

Kurt watched interestedly. Blaine gave an impossibly adorable grin and whispered something to whoever was inside the house. Wes stuck his head out of the back door and looked at Kurt, smirking and then nodding at Blaine. "Hey, David, look whose here!"

David poked his head out, looking legitimately surprised, and then he smiled. "What do you know? It's _Blaine_."

"We'd probably better feed him before he starts to eat us or something." Wes snorted. "And look, David. Blaine has a _boyfriend_."

"Sun of a gun!" David said, more to be amusing than anything Kurt assumed. Blaine's friends were always trying to be funny. "He's got a pale, white boy! Way to take away from the diversity of the group, Blaine."

"Hey, he's pretty sweet at least." Wes shrugged. He leaned to Blaine and began speaking, barely loud enough for Kurt to hear. "You better take my advice and keep this one."

"This one?" Kurt questioned, raising his eyebrow at Blaine when Wes went back into the house laughing.

"Ignore him. He's still learning English." Blaine joked.

…

"First, we set up the table." Wes said, ceremoniously putting a vase with a single flower plucked from the front yard on the small table.

"This is a very small table." Kurt whispered to Blaine.

"It's Wes' little sister's table." Blaine whispered back. "She's two."

"Ah." Kurt nodded. That made sense.

David came in with a bag of Tostitos and a jar of Salsa. "Here's your chips and dip, Wesley."

"Chips? And dip? What's the matter with you, David? This isn't any ordinary night! Tonight, Blaine's on a date. He gets the best in the house!" Wes exclaimed, looking as if David had lost his mind.

"If you say so." David shrugged.

Wes looked at Kurt and Blaine intently. "Now, tell me, what's your pleasure? A la carta? Dinner?"

"How about the spaghetti that you conveniently made half an hour ago when I texted you?" Blaine asked.

"Hey, David. Blaine says he wants two spaghetti speciale, heavy on the meats-a ball." Wes called, gesturing with his hand and mouth as he said 'meats-a ball' with a thick Italian accent.

"And what would that be?" David questioned.

Wes nodded his head towards the kitchen and said to Kurt and Blaine, "Sorry. I'm currently seeking new help."

Blaine rolled his eyes, looking pleased when Kurt actually laughed.

"I heard that!" David called from the other room.

…

"Now here you are! The best spaghetti for a hundred miles, made right in my kitchen by _me_!" Wes announced several minutes later, placing a large plate of spaghetti in the middle of the tiny children's table. "Sorry. The table isn't big enough for two plates."

"It's okay." Blaine laughed, taking both forks from Wes and holding one out for Kurt.

"Why thank you." Kurt said, smiling brightly at Blaine.

David walked in, carrying his iHome.

"Oh my God." Blaine said, looking torn between looking horrified and amused.

"I took the liberty of _legally _downloading the music to Bella Notte since Blaine is the only one who can actually play an instrument in our trio." David informed Kurt. "So I hope that you'll at least enjoy us serenading you two while you eat."

"Oh my God." Blaine said again, looking at Kurt as Kurt as he took a bite of the spaghetti.

"This is really good." Kurt said, looking shocked. "Wes made this?"

"I told you it was good. You should trust me. If there's one thing I know besides music, it's good food." Blaine smiled adorably, nose scrunching up a bit. "You really like it?"

"Yes. Judging by how fast we're eating it, I think it's safe to say we both do." Kurt remarked, smiling back at Blaine. _God, could he be any more adorable?_

It was easy to forget that it was Wes and David singing while they ate spaghetti. It was also easy to forget that they were doing so while sitting at a toddler's tea table. It was easy to forget many things in that moment because he was _finally _on a real _date _with Blaine Anderson.

"There's only one noodle left." Blaine said, interrupting his thoughts. He nodded down at their almost empty plate, which only had one noddle and one meatball on it.

"You can have it." Kurt said, looking into Blaine's eyes.

Blaine leaned over the table, surprising Kurt with a gentle and quick kiss.

Kurt was the first to pull away, more out of shock than anything. Blaine looked at him, nervously at first and then almost shyly.

"You can have the last meatball."

"I don't want the last meatball."

"What are you talking about?"

Kurt sat up quickly, looking around his and Blaine's apartment. He was on the couch with his sketchbook on the floor and the DVD remote control laying on top of it. The credits to Lady and the Tramp rolled on the television while the music to Bella Notte played. "Huh?"

"You just said 'I don't want the last meatball.'" Blaine answered, looking amused. "Did you fall asleep sketching again?"

"I guess so." Kurt rubbed his face, leaning back against the couch pillows. "What time is it?"

"Eight." Blaine responded, plopping on the couch next to Kurt.

"You should make spaghetti tonight." Kurt said, now leaning against Blaine.

"Spaghetti does sound really good." Blaine said thoughtfully, wrapping his arm around Kurt and then tugging him closer. "Doesn't it?"

"It does." Kurt leaned his head on Blaine's shoulder, snuggling close. "It really does."


	48. Father's Day 2

"Blaine…"

Blaine grunted, burrowing his face in Kurt's side.

"Blaine…"

"Mmmmno."

"It's almost noon and the kids haven't woken us up yet."

"Good." Blaine mumbled, burrowing farther. "Stop talking."

Kurt laughed, running his fingers through Blaine's messy curls. "You need a—."

"Noooo stop talking. I said stop." Blaine whined, pulling the pillow over the back of his head.

This time Kurt laughed even louder, sitting up. "Happy Father's Day."

"It'd be happier if you'd let me enjoy the gift of sleep which the children and clearly bestowing upon us." Blaine muttered as he sat up.

"No. I'm pretty sure they're bestowing the gift upon themselves." Kurt snorted as he slid out of bed, moving just in time to avoid Blaine smacking his butt.

"Hmph." Blaine pouted before rubbing his face. He then yawned. "Afternoon."

"Good afternoon." Kurt laughed, pulling on a pair of jeans (designer, of course) and a button down shirt. "I'm afraid we're going to walk into mass terror."

"They probably forgot." Blaine climbed out of bed and pulled on pajama pants, not even bothering to get dressed. He then opened the door and yelled, "NO FOOD OR WATER EVER BECAUSE THERE WAS NO BREAKFAST IN BED!"

Kurt threw back his head, laughing loudly, as a breakfast bar zoomed through the air and hit Blaine in the face.

"Does that at least get me one meal?" Nick stuck his head out of his bedroom.

Blaine rolled his eyes. "Maybe half a meal."

"S'okay. I'll just go to Ryan's. They have _plenty _of food." Nick shrugged, coming out and reaching to pat Blaine's head.

"I'll bite you." Blaine threatened.

"That's child abuse."

"I'm going to be as tall as you." Nick grinned. "I think I'll probably be taller. You weren't as tall as I am now until you were 22."

"Oh, you'll be taller than him. He only grew an inch and a half then he was done." Kurt said.

Zach came out, yawning.

"Nice of everyone to join the _waking world_." Sophie said, coming up from the kitchen. "Are you aware that I've cleaned the entire house for you two, I made lunch—you're welcome. I tried to make a cake but, Daddy, I want you to help me make another one because it did it again."

"You've got to _keep an eye on it_." Kurt said, walking down the stairs with her and shaking his head. "You can't text and Skype while baking. Trust me. It's how I ruined the cake for Daddy and I's wedding rehearsal cake."

"Who has cake at those things anyway?" Zach asked, following them down. He was perpetually hungry and 'lunch' was enough to get him down there.

"Well Blaine went through this phase after Harvard when he was studying for the Bar. If he wasn't at the firm helping the licensed lawyers with cases, he was at home eating cake and studying." Kurt explained and then lowered his voice. "He gained fifteen pounds."

"Shut up! It was water weight!" Blaine called from upstairs.

"More like Dr. Pepper and coffee weight." Kurt muttered, causing Zach to snicker. "I told him he had to lose it before the wedding because otherwise he'd have to order a new tux. That got him back into running really fast."

"Daddy's a tightwad." Nick announced, jumping off the last stair and then hopping onto the counter. "These sandwiches are deformed, Soapy."

"Your face is deformed." Sophie snapped.

"Your face is deformed." Nick mimicked.

"Guys, guys, guys. Can't we all be friends?" Blaine asked, kissing the top of Sophie's head. "I think that it gives them character."

"Thank you, Daddy." Sophie smiled brightly. "Happy Father's Day."

"Thank you, Monkey." Blaine winked and ruffled her hair before she went off to hug Kurt too. "Don't I get a Happy Farther's Day from you two?"

"Sure. After they make a Happy Son's Day." Zach said, stepping up to hug him. "Happy Father's Day."

"Every day I buy you what you ask for is son's day." Blaine snorted, hugging him back tightly.

"What, Daddy?" Zach groaned, looking at Kurt. "Every time we stand right next to each other, you get that look."

"You two look so alike." Kurt said, looking surprised when Nick suddenly hugged him.

"Happy Father's Dayyyy." Nick grinned.

"So what's the plan? You three always have a plan." Blaine asked.

"Well it was Sophie's idea to have lunch together. It was my idea to go to the city—_not near where you guys work_. They've got some awesome exhibits going on around town and I thought it could be fun to do together. Zach's idea will probably be your favorite, though."

"It will." Zach grinned.

"It does top ours." Sophie pouted a bit.

"For dinner, we're going to go to Nitehawk. They're doing a showing of When Harry Met Sally."

"Awww, Zachy." Kurt said, ruffling his curls.

"It was dumb luck." Zach shrugged, looking embarrassed.

"Thank you, kids." Blaine said, ruffling Nick's dirty blonde hair. "So, lunch time?"

"Yeah." Sophie sighed. "Guess Daddy and I will have to work on a cake tomorrow."

"I'm off." Kurt smiled. "You just have to keep—."

"The phone off." Sophie finished for him. "I know, I know."

…

"Remember when we'd eat together and the kids would argue the whole time?" Blaine asked not even ten minutes later, talking over Sophie and Nick who were arguing about something.

"Oh, you mean, _right now_?" Kurt asked, leaning back in his chair. They were outside in the back yard on their patio table. The lunch had gone quite nice until Sophie had made a comment about Nick wanting to drive to Lima the following week to stay with their grandparents. (Something along the lines of "I wouldn't ride in a car with you driving that far on a highway to get out of being buried alive" but who was keeping track?)

"Do you remember when they were younger? They'd make us cute cards, set the kitchen on fire trying to make us pancakes?" Blaine asked, stealing some chips from Zach's plate.

"I didn't _mean _to set the kitchen on fire." Zach said, looking embarrassed. "And it was really only the curtains."

"I love you, baby." Kurt laughed, leaning over and hugging him.

"Hey, hey, hey. You two!" Blaine said, waving his hands in the air. "Hello? Pay attention to the fathers? No? Good thing it's Bickering Children Day and not _Father's Day_. Guess I forgot."

Kurt snorted, putting his hand on Blaine's knee and squeezing.

"Shut it!" Zach, who usually was the one to get annoyed and put a stopper in the fighting because Kurt and Blaine had chosen to pick their battles long ago when it came to those two, slapped his hand on the table between their plates. "Your father would like a word."

"Pass the Mayo?" Blaine asked, smiling sweetly.

"Here." Sophie huffed as Nick grinned, looking pleased with himself.

"Now stop fighting. It' Father's Day. We'd like no more arguing and to spend _time _with our kids. Free from _arguing_." Kurt said, looking between Nick and Sophie. "Nick, this means not egging your sister on. Sophie, Nick is a very good driver. However, trust me, I wouldn't ride in a car for a thirteen hour drive with him next week either. Or your father, for that matter."

"Seriously, Daddy?" Nick scoffed.

Blaine, however, whipped his head to look at Kurt. "My God. I taught both of them how to drive. You about had a nervous breakdown trying to teach Nick how to parallel park. Yet _you _won't get in a car with _me_? Should I remind you what happened to your Navigato—."

"Don't talk about it." Kurt said, actually looking upset.

"Oh no. Daddy went there." Zach cringed.

"No car will _ever _be as good as my Navigator. And for the record, it's not _my _fault."

"It was _entirely _your fault." Nick corrected. "I was there, in the front seat. Remember?"

"Nicholas…" Kurt threatened.

"Fine. Just so you know, though, denial isn't healthy." Nick ducked when Kurt through a chip at his head. "A kid in Africa could have eaten that!"

"I might ship you to Africa if you don't quit starting trouble." Kurt threatened.

"Starting trouble? Kurt, you ran a red light and plowed into a light pole swerving to avoid traffic." Blaine said. "With your fourteen year old son in the car. In the front seat."

"It had just turned yellow." Kurt said through gritted teeth.

Nick threw his arm out to his side and dramatically cried, "NICK NO!" before pushing Zach back against his chair.

"Daddy still does that to me if a car ahead of us stops suddenly." Sophie giggled.

"Yeah. He does it to me too." Blaine nudged Kurt's side and then smiled. "You've got a new Navigator. It's cool."

"Puh." Kurt scowled.

"Alright." Sophie cleared her throat. "Seeing as it's Father's Day, I think everybody should say something to each of them. I'll go first."

Nick groaned. "You can't just put us on the spot like that."

"Yes. Shower me with compliments." Blaine grinned. "You know you're my favorite."

Kurt reached back, whacking Blaine upside the back of his head. "You don't have a favorite. Stop. Every time one of them is nice to you, you tell them that."

"Hey. I never hear that." Nick pouted, although he was clearly lying.

"You're never nice to me." Blaine teased.

"You gotta give it to receive it, old man." Nick said.

"That's what she said." Zach said before his eyes widened. He glanced at Kurt who was glaring. "Sorry! It slipped! I swear!"

"That's what she said!" Nick said, holding up his hand for a high-five.

Blaine shook his head, very clearly trying _so hard _not to laugh at his sons. It was even harder not to laugh when they high-fived and Zach immediately sent Kurt a sheepish look.

"Twin boys." Kurt sighed, shaking his head. "You know, this is the age I dreaded most. I can see I was rightfully worried."

"Hey!" Zach and Nick said together.

"Can I please say my thing?" Sophie asked, looking annoyed.

"Yes. Go on, sweetie." Kurt said.

"I really appreciate what you all do and I love you both so much. You two are the best dads in the world. I know we don't have the most conventional family but I wouldn't change it for the world… any of it." She sent a look at Nick.

"I knew you loved me." Nick leaned over, pressing a loud kiss to her cheek. "I love you too, sister."

"Almost any of it." Sophie teasingly added.

"I love you all too." Zach added. "We know it's not easy to raise this many kids and work the hours you all do and… You know, the whole Japan thing is really going to be okay. I know Dad isn't exactly on board all the way but… but I'm glad we all get to do this thing together and that Daddy is still getting the opportunity to do something like this even with three kids."

"Way to slip that in there, Zach." Nick snorted.

"C'mon, Daddy." Sophie said, looking at Blaine. "Japan will be _awesome_. It's only three months."

"Well, Kurt will be gone three months before _we _go. Don't forget that." Blaine pointed out.

"My turn!" Nick said quickly. "The media thinks you're the next Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka. You're role models for your gay teens and whatever. That's great and all but to us you're just… our parents. And you're great parents, great fathers, and… and we love you. So, thanks. You're the best dads ever."

Kurt got up, going to hug him.

"Even if I'm a _little _bummed out that I'm going to have to sit out half a soccer season…" Nick added. "Maybe the girls in Japan will be hot."

Blaine rolled his eyes. "Dating is not the most important thing in the world."

"Says the one who is married with kids. When you were sixteen, I bet you dated."

Blaine coughed and busied himself taking a drink of his soda.

"And when you were 17, you made out with Aunt Rachel." Zach added.

"Alrighty then!" Kurt clapped his hands, much like he had that night in Rachel's basement watching Blaine and Rachel suck face. "Enough of that. Lunch was lovely, let's all get dressed and move onto Nick's portion of Father's Day celebration, shall we? _Blaine _gets to do the dishes."

"You cannot keep punishing me for something I did when I was seventeen, Kurt!" Blaine called as Kurt went into their house.

"Watch me, love!" Kurt called back, ushering the twins inside. "Go on, get dressed in something nice. If the paparazzi gets our pictures again, I'd like them to look nice."

"Considering last time Dad was yelling into his phone, you were glaring at the camera, and Nick and I were in our pajamas still?" Zach asked, blinking at Kurt with Blaine's hazel eyes.

"Well…. _Yes_. I mean, we're not a family of barbarians." Kurt sighed. "Contrary to what Miranda Adams seems to think… _Ugh_. Just get dressed, alright? And at least try to brush your curls. I don't know why you insist on having it all afro-y all the time. Honestly. Your father cut it when he was 15 and you see how handsome he was."

"_Was_?" Blaine scoffed, coming in.

"Now you're _dashing_." Kurt said smoothly.

"He meant old." Nick supplied.

"Nick!" Kurt and Blaine snapped together.

"Myself and the Barbarians are offended." Nick wiped a fake tear from his cheek.

"Go get dressed. _Properly _dressed." Kurt sighed. "Luckily we don't have to wait on Sophie."

"Because then we'd be waiting five gazillion years." Nick nodded.

"Nicholas Graysen…" Kurt said.

"I'm going, I'm going. But just remember—you brought me into this world on your own free will. You brought everything I do, every annoyance, on yourself." Nick smiled sweetly. "Can't blame a broken condom on this one."

"Just a peaceful Father's Day. It's all I ask." Kurt whined. "Please?"

There was a loud bang from the kitchen and then a shriek from Sophie followed by a whoops from Blaine.

"Blood!"

"Kurt, your peaceful Father's Day might have to wait until we get back from the hospital!" Blaine yelled. "I just cut my hand!"

"Guess I don't need to get dressed yet." Nick chirped before going into the kitchen. He turned back around, looking queasy. "That's a lot of blood."

Kurt grabbed a towel from the linen closet and rushed to Blaine. "Here, hold it up, come on."

"It started to fall so I went to grab it before it hit the floor which was not my smartest decision ever." Blaine explained very calmly as Sophie began to clean blood off of the floor.

"You probably don't need to go but we'll go just to be safe." Kurt sighed, looking at it. "C'mon. Guess you'll have to ride in a car with me. I promise I'll try not to run into the median."

"Har har." Blaine pouted. "Round up the children. My new Father's Day wish is that they come to the ER with me. It'll be some quality bonding time."

"That's asking an awful lot." Nick called from the high way.

"Just let me pack some snacks first." Zach came into the kitchen.

"I'm bleeding out and he's going to get _snacks_." Blaine whined. "Am I really that unloved?"

"Psht. It's just a flesh wound, ol' man." Zach grinned.

"Car." Kurt pointed towards the back door, his other hand on Blaine's back. "Soph, can you lock the door since you'll be the last one out?"

"Yeah, Daddy." Sophie said.

"Yeah, Daddy." Nick mimicked

"Peaceful Father's Day." Kurt muttered.

"Maybe next year." Blaine shrugged.

"We said that the last three Father's Days."

"It's a wish, not a miracle."

Kurt snorted loudly, opening the passenger side door for Blaine. "I love you."

Blaine kissed him quickly before getting in the car. "I love you more."

"Gross." Zach groaned. "Can we keep it G rated? Between the blood and all the food I ate, I can't handle PG."

"You can't handle that? I'm sure they'll have holiday sex if Dad's hand doesn't hurt too bad tonight. Let _that _mental image sit in your head." Nick climbed into the back seat.

"Thank you, Nicholas." Sophie climbed into the middle seat.

"You're welcome."


	49. Kreacher Eats Chocolate

"Yeah, Kurt said we should be able to be there by nine or ten… I'm not sure. He's got a critique or an exam… I don't know, it's—." Blaine trailed off, holding the phone away from his ear.

Silence.

Complete _silence_.

"David, I'll call you back."

"Is everything okay?"

"Yeah. Bye." Blaine hung up and tossed his phone onto the couch, walking through the house. "Where is that dumb dog?"

He poked his head in his and Kurt's bedroom. Nope. Bathroom? Nope. Not even hiding in the shower.

"Kreacher? Want num nums?" Blaine called out, heading to the kitchen to grab his treats. "Shit."

Kreacher was laying on the floor by an overturned garbage can. He blinked at Blaine twice before looking away.

"_Shit_. That was a full… oh _fuck_ That's _bad_. Are you okay?"

Kreacher lifted his head a bit.

"Uh… _shit… _Okay, wait right here. Don't move, alright?" Blaine ran out of the room, fumbling on his and Kurt's dresser for the vet's card. When he dialed it, he made his way back into the kitchen. "Hi, yeah, my dog got into the trash and—."

"Ate chocolate?" The woman on the other end asked.

"Yeah. He's acting weird."

"How much did he get to?"

"It looks like a lot." Blaine crouched down, petting Kreacher gently.

"Is he breathing okay?"

"Yes, he's just not acting… normal." Blaine said lamely.

"But he's conscious?"

"Yes."

"What you need to do is induce vomiting." The woman spoke calmly.

"How do I do that?" Blaine asked instantly.

"What you want to do first is feed him a piece of burnt toast. It will help absorb the toxins from the chocolate and it'll make it easier for him to vomit." She explained.

"Okay, then what?"

"Wait five minutes. For every ten pounds your dog weighs, give him 1 teaspoon of 3% hydrogen peroxide."

"How do I do _that_?"

"If he won't willingly ingest it, use a syringe and put the fluid on the back of his tongue and tilt his head." The woman said, still calm. "Wait about ten minutes and try to get him to walk around some. He should vomit after he walks some because it will agitate his stomach. A second dose can be given if he doesn't vomit, though."

"Okay." Blaine took a deep breath.

"After he vomits, bring him on in. We'll check him over really well and make sure he doesn't suffer from chocolate toxicity." She finished. "What is your name?"

"Blaine Anderson, but he may be under Kurt Hummel's name. He's both of ours, I'm not sure which na—."

"I found him." She reassured him. "I'm setting up an appointment in an emergency slot. Come right on in. If you can't get him to vomit within twenty minutes, call the office again."

"Thank you very much." Blaine hung up his phone and scrambled to make burnt toast and to find peroxide. "You know if you die, Kurt will never forgive me."

Kreacher whined a bit and sat up.

"That's right." Blaine said, getting the appropriate amount of peroxide set up before getting the toast and sitting by Kreacher on the cold floor. "C'mon. Num nums. I know you probably aren't very hungry, but I need you to eat this for me."

Kreacher fought Blaine for a few minutes and only began to eat the toast after Blaine smeared peanut butter on it.

"You're picky like Kurt." Blaine remarked as Kreacher chowed down on the toast. "Good boy. Now you're going to have to drink this delicious peroxide for me."

Kreacher blinked several times before clamping his mouth shut.

"Come on, boy." Blaine coaxed, scratching behind his ear. "C'mon. We can do this. You can listen to me just once, right?"

Kreacher covered his face with his paw.

"Don't make me call Kurt."

Kreacher growled a bit and then lowered his paw, very clearly glaring at Blaine.

Blaine let out an audible sigh of relief and poured the peroxide into Kreacher's mouth, letting out another sigh when Kreacher actually swallowed it. "Good boy! Let's go for a walk! Let's go for a walk!"

Kreacher wagged his tail and then stood.

"Good Kreacher. Let's go walk outside! Where there isn't carpet!" Blaine grabbed Kreacher's leash off of the counter and clipped it to his collar. "Then we're going to go to a quick run somewhere where I won't say and then we'll come home and I'll even snuggle you." _If they let me bring you home… _he thought, trying not to feel _too _guilty. After all, it easily could have been Kurt there when this happened and not Blaine.

Kreacher walked around the yard with Blaine, going slower than normal but still moving fast enough to ease Blaine's nerves a bit. He sure didn't _look _like he was going to drop dead. About seven minutes later (not that Blaine was keeping track to the second or anything), Kreacher began to vomit.

"Gross." Blaine cringed, rubbing Kreacher's little back as he puked. "This is why we don't get in the trash. So we don't have to have icky throwups. Let's go to the car. We're going to go to the… park."

_Liar._

_It's a wonder this dog even likes you._

Kreacher hopped into the passenger seat when Blaine opened the door, panting.

"Okay, Kreacher. When we get home, Kurt does not hear about this… Like you could tell him anything anyway. You're a dog." Blaine took a deep breath, getting into the driver's side and starting the car.

…

"So… how did it go today?" Kurt came into the living room several hours later, finding Blaine on the couch reading for one of his English classes and Kreacher lying at his feet.

"I already told you. It went fine." Blaine glanced up.

"Why did the vet just call to check on Kreacher after his _emergency appointment_?" Kurt questioned.

Blaine dropped the book just as Kreacher covered his eyes with one of his paws.

"Kurt, isn't the important thing that Kreacher and I bonded? This experience will do wonders for our relationship." Blaine reached down, scratching behind Kreacher's ear for added effect.

"You forgot to take the trash out even though that bad chocolate was at the top of the bag?" Kurt asked, sighing.

"Shh. Kreacher's had a long day and he's resting." Blaine held a finger to his lips. "Vet said he needs plenty of rest."

"It's like having kids." Kurt muttered to himself as he walked out of the room.


	50. Babies Warning: Teenage Attitude

"THIS IS SO UNFAIR!"

Blaine sat at the table, trying his hardest to _not _look amused. Had his thirteen year old daughter _really _thought he would let her and her best friend go to Disney World with two seventeen year old boys? _Right_.

"They're _practically _adults, daddy!"

"Really? They're practically adults? How long has the boy even had his license?"

Sophie stomped her foot.

"Oh, God. Soph, really?" Kurt asked.

"_You _would let me go!" Sophie whined.

Kurt let out a loud laugh and left the room. "She's all yours, dearheart."

"Any parent who would let their child do that is stupid. And I'm pretty sure Amanda's father is going to say the same thing when she asks." Blaine said, keeping his voice very calm.

"He already said yes."

"I wasn't born yesterday. This is where you and she both say the other parent already said yes." Blaine said. "If you really want to argue with me, Soph, go right on ahead. But I have to tell you that your argument is surprisingly _bad _for the child of a lawyer."

Sophie's face screwed up in anger and she stomped her foot again. "You don't understand! I'm stuck in a house full of guys and nobody ever understands!"

"You tell him, sista!" Nick declared, walking through the room.

"Nick…" Blaine tried to scold, but he couldn't stop himself smiling.

"Let her go. Maybe Prince Eric will take her away." Nick raised his hands dramatically. "In a carriage pulled by seahorses with an annoying dancing crab following it."

"YOU'RE SO OBNOXIOUS!" Sophie shrieked.

"If you haven't figured that out before now, you aren't very smart!" Nick exclaimed.

"Nick, go on." Blaine shooed his oldest son away after adding, "Don't forget about Flounder."

"Good luck, Banketi." Nick saluted.

"What's that?" Blaine tilted his head.

"Dad in German." Nick chirped before leaving the room.

"Listen to me! You don't understand!" Sophie said. "Most girls my age do this!"

"In college when they're 18 and their parents don't have a say they do this. Very fortunately for me, I do have a say." Blaine smiled sweetly. "Since you're _thirteen_."

"I HATE YOU! YOU'RE RUINING MY LIFE!" Sophie shrieked before storming up the stairs and slamming her bedroom door.

"Let it be known that on this day, March 15th, 2034, I have succeeded as a father!" Blaine announced loudly before bursting into laughter.

Kurt peeked his head in. "Did she really just say 'I hate you, you're ruining my life' and storm upstairs? I thought that only happened in bad movies."

"Isn't it amazing? I feel like a real parent. Girls are so dramatic. I love it. Nick and Zach just go off and pout in their rooms quietly." Blaine grinned.

"AND QUIT ENJOYING THIS!" Sophie shrieked before slamming her door again.

"TRY AND STOP ME!" Blaine yelled up the stairs and then said, "Man, I feel like eating out tonight. Zach, can you print me a World's Best Dad award off the internet?"

He heard a sigh from Zach, who was sitting in the same room on the couch working on homework and completely unaffected by the drama going on around him—you got used to a loud house when you lived with Nick. "Yes. But really you can use the website yourself too, you know?"

Kurt came forward, kissing Blaine quickly. "I hate you and you're ruining my life too since apparently that statement makes you so happy. I mean if I'd known I wouldn't have told you I loved you all these years."

"I hate you and you're ruining my life too." Blaine grinned.


	51. Babies Warning: Preggers

"And you… you're ready? And happy?" Kurt asked Zach, resisting the urge to jump up in the air triumphantly _yet_.

"I mean 21 may not be the ideal age to have a baby but it beats 19, right?" Zach asked, giving Kurt a lopsided smile. "I… I am excited. I'm really excited. I know I'll be finishing Veterinarian school with the baby here but… I-I'm excited."

Kurt threw his arms around Zach, hugging him tightly. "I'm so happy for you and Sarah! Oh my _God_. You're having a baby, Zach!"

Zach laughed, hugging Kurt back.

"Geeze. Are you sure you're ready? Has she been to the doctor?"

"Well she's three months along. We wanted to wait to make sure she didn't miscarry." Zach admitted. "So she has been. It's a healthy size and has an excellent heart rate so they're saying it _may_ be a boy but there really isn't a way to know for a few more weeks."

Kurt smiled. "What do you want?"

"As long as it's healthy, I don't _care_. I just want the pregnancy to go smoothly and for it to be healthy." Zach smiled.

"Have you thought of names?" Kurt asked.

"We can't agree on anything." Zach said, sitting on the couch and looking positively thrilled.

"It's a good thing you boys were twins because Blaine and I were at each other's necks between Nick and Zack if we had a boy." Kurt laughed. "It was like a Godsend because we both agreed on Sophie for a girl."

Zach laughed. "You liked Nick better, didn't you?"

"I'm not telling who had picked which. But they were both in mine and Blaine's top 2." Kurt sat by him, squeezing his leg. "Well what's the plan? What do you need? You probably need everything."

"The vet I'm working at gave me a raise. We've both been saving all of our paychecks… Thanks for paying our rent, by the way." Zach smiled.

"You're welcome. Dad and I will get it covered. Just save your money. He already said that he was going to open yours and Nick's inheritance accounts. Did you know Nick is about to buy a house? And Sophie is off at Harvard. I don't know what to do with myself. It's kind of depressing."

"Want my baby?" Zach teased.

"Maybe!" Kurt sighed a bit. "It doesn't have to call me Grandpa does it?"

"Would you prefer Gramps?" Zach grinned.

Kurt rolled his eyes.

"I'm… kind of scared." Zach admitted. "Babies are so… _small. _When Melody and Ryan had their baby I barely held it when it was newborn because I was afraid I would break it or something."

"Carole stayed for nearly two weeks when Blaine and I had you twins." Kurt said, tucking a leg underneath him. "And once, when she was gone, you kind of choked a little bit. I went and stayed with Rachel every day when Blaine was at work for two weeks after that because I was afraid something would happen."

"That makes me feel better." Zach let out a sigh.

"You'll have help." Kurt promised. "You should take classes and read books. But when it comes down to it, it's going to be instinct."

Zach nodded.

"You'll make mistakes and you'll learn from them and do better the next day. But you're going to make an _amazing _father, Zachary."

"Even if I don't really… like people?" Zach asked.

"Even if you don't like people." Kurt asked. "You have to like your kid. From the minute you see that baby, it's instant."

"Where you scared?"

"To become the father to twin boys?" Kurt scoffed. "I was terrified. I signed up for girls and out come two little loud baby boys who _peed _on me and just thought it was _hilarious_."

"Peed on you?"

"On me. Sometimes in my _mouth_. I'd wait for the waterfall to end, go down to put the new diaper on, and you or Nick would start again! I kept five toothbrushes on hand at _all _times." Kurt shook his head. "It's worth it, though. All the baby poop ruined clothes, peeing in the mouth, temper tantrums… It's all worth it because then they turn into you and Nick and Sophie." He gestured at Zach. "And you realize that you did that. You got one son to pro soccer, another in pre-vet school, a daughter at Harvard undergrad."

Zach nodded.

"You're going to be terrified. You'll have nervous breakdowns. You'll be tired and there will be dumb fights just to vent frustration but you'll see that it's all worth it. Especially when the baby says Dada for the first time. Wait for that one." Kurt smiled. "You'll be scared but you're ready. I promise."

"Any advice on cravings?"

"The great thing about you kids is Blaine and I didn't have you. We paid for the food that was a result of the cravings but there were no 3AM trips in snow to buy pickles." Kurt laughed. "That's all you, Zachy."

"She's eating me out of house and home!" Zach exclaimed. "I have to make brownies like every other night and she eats them with _Mustard_!"

"That is _disgusting!"_

"I know. It makes me sick to my stomach!" Zach cringed. "Don't get me started on the fact that she has this huge jar she uses to mix Ketchup and nacho cheese because it's 'sooo good.'"

Kurt snorted loudly.

"And if I look disgusted, she cries." Zach rolled his eyes. "Too bad I don't want to be an actor because this is _great _practice."

"You'll be okay." Kurt hugged him, still sitting down.

"I'll be better than okay." Zach said, hugging Kurt back. "I'll be great."


	52. Babies Warning: Underwear Shopping

"This is what happens when you take more than one vacation day. You turn into a seven year old." Kurt sighed, dragging Blaine into the kids clothes.

"Kurt, that rabbit and I formed a bond and—."

"Yes just like you and the sugar gliders and hamsters and guinea pigs and cats and dogs and that kangaroo at the zoo." Kurt rolled his eyes, squeezing Blaine's hand.

"Don't they have enough clothes? You, the twins, and Soph are killing me with these overflowing closets. Sophie asked me to have another one built-in." Blaine whined. "You go through money as fast as I can bring it in."

"We're multi-millionaires. We'll be okay." Kurt reassured him, pulling him towards the kids underwear section.

"Oooh, power rangers." Blaine said, picking up a package.

"No, Blaine." Kurt shook his head. "They just need plain white underwear."

"Then there will be run marks. You know the boys don't wipe very well." Blaine pointed out. "And this one has the Avengers. Oh, come on. Zach would _love _these Captain America boxers. They're so _cute_."

"Blaine, that isn't what they _need_."

"I don't know why you keep repeating my name like it'll make me stop, _Kurt_." Blaine hugged. "Besides, the power rangers are my favorite."

"Then buy some for _yourself_."

"Do they make them my size?" Blaine asked eagerly.

"I don't know. Why don't you go check the toddlers?" Kurt asked, face innocent. "After all, they probably would have it you until your growth spurt at 22."

Blaine scowled. "The height jokes should have stopped when I got taller than you. This isn't fair."

"It's only half an inch, dear." Kurt grabbed some plain Fruit of the Loom boxer briefs and tossed them into the cart.

"These too." Blaine tossed some Batman boxers in. "For Nick. And these," He tossed in some Avengers ones. "For Zach."

"You were talking about how they have too much clothes and now you're doubling the amount we're buying." Kurt let out an exasperated noise.

"Look! Dinosaur ones! Dude, Kurt, can we go see the new Jurassic Park?" Blaine tossed them in.

Kurt lifted them out of the cart. "You know full and well that I'm not going to go and see those movies with you. They should have quit in the 90s when they were ahead. Why don't you go with David and Wes?"

"David's afraid of dinosaurs and Wes has to be home early to read the toddler to sleep. Otherwise she _cries_. I don't know why. I sure wouldn't miss him." Blaine pushed the cart towards the girls section. "ARIEL AND PRINCE ERIC!"

Kurt lunged forward, covering Blaine's mouth as several people gave him weird looks. "Shh!"

Blaine spoke, voice muffled by Kurt's hand.

"What?" Kurt pulled his hand down.

"Can we get these too?" Blaine asked sweetly.

"You are way too excited to be buying these kids underwear. People probably think you're a pedophile." Kurt laughed, taking them from Blaine. He then smirked. "Then again, maybe they think you _are _a kid."

Blaine scowled.

"God, you look just like Zach when you do that. It's kinda cute." Kurt said, smirk turning into a smile.

"Well, you know, I am kinda cute." Blaine grinned, rocking forward on his feet so he was closer to Kurt. "It might be the curls. Or the eyes. Or the smile. Or the nose, even. You can take your pick."

"I love you." Kurt said, stepping up and kissing him.

"People are going to think _you're _a pedophile kissing me like that while holding girl's Disney panties." Blaine mumbled into his lips.

"Had to ruin it, didn't you?" Kurt asked.

Blaine pointed at a kid who was hiding under one of the clothes racks, staring at them. "Well he's probably the one that ruined it… How old do you have to be to be considered a peeping tom?"

Kurt dropped the package of panties into the cart and then added another plain one. "Let's just go now, please. He's creepy."

"Can we go down the toy aisle? For the kids, of course."

Kurt steered Blaine away from the clothing aisles. "When are you going back to work again?"


	53. Zach Gets A Kitten

"Look at what your son has. Just look." Kurt said, barging into Blaine's office without even knocking.

Blaine, who was looking over papers, looked up with a puzzled face. "Huh? Hello to you too."

Nicky waltzed in, making his remote control dinosaur walk in front of him.

"Yes. I've seen that before…"

"Not that son. _This_ one." Kurt reached back and nudged his youngest and shorter son into the room. "This is _entirely_ your fault and I think you set this up."

"What?" Blaine asked, standing and looking more confused than ever. "What do you have there, Munchie?"

Zachy turned the other way, looking down at his arms which were clearly cradling something. "Don't be mad."

"Oh, we're mad." Kurt sighed.

"It's so nice that I'm not the one in trouble." Nicky said cheerfully, leading his dinosaur straight for Blaine who had to open his legs to avoid being attacked by the toy, which was now loudly 'rawr'ing.

"Oh, we just haven't gotten to you yet." Kurt said. "I haven't forgotten that letter from your teacher."

Nicky sighed dramatically, sounding put out. "Why am I always getting into trouble?"

"I'd like to know the answer to that too."

Blaine approached Zachy and bent down, looking in his arms. "_It's so cute_!"

Zachy, who had looked very forlorn, perked right up. "He followed me, Dad! He likes me!"

"Can I hold him?" Blaine asked eagerly.

"_No_!" Kurt snapped. "Blaine, you're supposed to be on my side."

"It was scared, Daddy, and I saved it." Zachy said, looking at Kurt with big eyes.

"It wasn't scared. It just knows one of your fathers is gullible." Kurt scoffed.

"I always wanted a kitten after Oreo and you always said no. Then when I got out of Harvard, Melody was attached to her and I couldn't take her back." Blaine said, tilting his head. "And now Zachy wants one."

"_Blaine…_" Kurt sighed.

"_Pllllleeeeease_! He likes me." Zachy protested, bouncing up and down and pouting up at Kurt with Blaine's bright hazel eyes. "Daddy, he likes me."

"Zachary, we cannot have a cat. We have a puppy. Two puppies."

"But Kreacher's _your_ puppy." Nicky interrupted. "And he's kinda… kinda a…"

"Attention hog?" Blaine offered.

"Uh huh." Nicky nodded. "He takes my stuff."

"See? That dog has it out for me and my offspring, Kurt. He doesn't harass Sophie." Blaine said.

"Great. Let's get a cat with claws and keep it in a house with a toddler." Kurt snapped. "She'll end up making it mad and it will hurt her. You know she loves pulling Kreacher's tail. The only reason Kreacher is okay with it is because he's now gone through Melody, Nicky, Zachy, David's kids, Wes' kid, and Rachel and Finn's kids. This new kitten hasn't had that yet. Zachary, don't you dare start the crying!"

"Look at how upset he is." Blaine cooed. He kneeled down, hugging Zachy, and whispered, "Keep going."

Zachy just glared at him and then at Kurt, both looking and sounding absolutely heartbroken. "I want a cat! You promised me a hamster and you didn't get it! And you promised me a bunny!"

"_You've done this to me since I met you_!" Blaine exclaimed. "Why are you so cruel?"

"You won't even let us get dumb sea monkeys." Nicky added. "And everyone loves those things."

"Don't call things dumb." Blaine sighed. "You're outnumbered here, Kurt."

"We can name him Bubbles." Zachy said hopefully.

"No, that's girly. We'll name him _Monster_." Nicky said, growling for emphasis.

Blaine gently took the kitten. "Boys, he is a she."

"Bubbles is good for a girl." Zachy chirped.

"No body said we were keeping the cat!" Kurt exclaimed. "Blaine!"

"Hey, you promised me a kitten when I was twenty. If it weren't for you sister, we'd still have her. I'm calling you out on this. It's time to pay up." Blaine said.

"We don't have time to raise a kitten." Kurt heaved a big sigh and kneeled down so he was level with the twins. "If she is overly messy and generally destructive—."

"_Like Kreacher_?"

"Blaine, shut up." Kurt snapped, making the boys giggle. He then continued, "And if she hurts your sister _even once_, _once_, we're giving her away."

Zachy let out a shriek. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!"

"We got a kitty, we got a kitty, we got a kitty!" Nicky sang, hopping onto Blaine's desk and starting to dance. "We got a kitty, we got a kitty!"

"_Hold on_." Kurt said, shooting Blaine a look as he snuggled the little kitten. "We do have to see if we can find the owner. _If _we can't find the owner,_then_ we'll… further discuss keeping her. Blaine, you're getting cat hair all over your suit."

"That's okay because our new kitten is so cute." Blaine cooed, holding the kitten up and touching noses with it. "Oh yes, she is!"

"Where's she going to sleep?" Kurt sighed heavily.

"With us!" Nicky said excitedly, jumping up and down. "With me and Zachy, Daddy! With me and Zachy!"

"Alright, alright, alright." Kurt sighed once again and shot a look in Blaine's direction. "Thank you, _Blaine_, for your help on this matter. I _greatly_appreciate it. Come on, kids. Let's go pick Sophie up so we can get the new kitten home."

Blaine smiled sweetly, waving at Kurt. "Have a nice car ride home."

"This will cost you, babe. It's going to cost you big." Kurt called before opening Blaine's office door.

"Wait, cost me what?" Blaine yelped.

"Something I cannot say in front of the children." Kurt said, smiling back just as sweetly and Blaine and waving. "Have a nice ride home!"

"Damnit." Blaine mumbled as his sons left and Kurt closed the door behind them. "I walked right into that one."


	54. Sophie's Weekend

"Daddy, how come Nicky and Zachy got to go to grandma and grandpa's but not _me_?" Sophie asked from the back seat of the car, kicking her little feet out and holding her Rapunzel doll. (It didn't matter that there had been 7 more Disney princesses since Rapunzel. She was 'emotionally attached.')

"Because your cousin is there too! It's all the boys!" Kurt said from the driver's seat. "Did yo want to stay with a bunch of boys?"

"You and Daddy are boys." Sophie said, giggling when Blaine grabbed her foot.

"We're fun boys, though." Blaine giggled also, kissing the top of her head. "We're going to have _so much fun!"_

"WE SEE LITTLE MERMAID?!" Sophie began to flail excitedly.

"Yes!" Blaine cheered.

"For the millionth time." Kurt added to where Blaine could hear but Sophie couldn't.

"We're going to pick up the tickets in the morning before we go to work." Blaine booped her nose. "And then we'll pick you up from Alec and Eric's house and we'll go see it again!"

"Can I meet her again, daddy? Will she remember me? Can we get a picture?" Sophie asked excitedly.

"If it's not too cold outside, we'll meet her again and we'll be sure to get pictures!"

"I like Alec and Eric, daddy. They're funny." Sophie clapped her hands.

"You just have a crush on Eric." Blaine teased.

Sophie began to giggle loudly, blushing.

"I think he's too old for you, sweetie." Kurt said from the driver seat.

"I also think he plays for the other team." Blaine snorted.

"What's that mean?" Sophie tilted her head.

"You'll understand one day." Blaine reassured her.

"I do _not _have a crush on Eric." Sophie said, sitting up straighter.

"Young lady, don't you lie to me. I know what it looks like when a Hummel has a crush on a boy." Blaine pointed.

Sophie stuck out her lower lip. "You're mean."

Kurt giggled. "Yeah, Blaine. You're mean."

Blaine reached up, gently flicking the back of Kurt's head. "Shut up."

"Daddy doesn't shut up for anybody!" Sophie squeaked.

"God, we've raised her right."

_Saturday:_

"ARE YOU READY TO GO?" Blaine exclaimed, running into Alec and Eric's house and over to his daughter.

"ARIEL! LITTLE MERMAID! AHHHHHHHHHHH!" Sophie shrieked, hopping down from the table and proceeding to jump up and down while squealing.

Alec burst into laughter. "Please, Eric, can we have one?"

"We have a hedgehog."

Alec huffed, waving at Kurt when he came in.

"Blaine, did you even knock?" Kurt asked, shaking his head.

"He doesn't need to knock." Alec rolled his eyes.

"Hug Alec and Eric bye."

Sophie ran to Alec and reached up for a hug.

"Can you say hi to Ariel for me?" Alec asked, hugging her tightly.

"Uh huh!" Sophie said, blushing when she was handed off to Eric.

Eric and Blaine exchanged looks, Blaine rolling his eyes.

"Are you going to say hi for me too?"

Sophie just giggled, arms going around his neck in a tight hug.

"It's so cute." Alec giggled quietly, covering his face.

"You better come back and see us." Eric said, handing Sophie to Blaine.

Sophie looked at Blaine, scowling. This prompted outright laughter from Kurt and Alec.

"Say bye, honey."

Sophie waved her little hand at Eric, looking at him longingly.

"Bye, Soph." Alec laughed, waving at her.

"Bye, Alec!" she chirped as Blaine carried her out.

"Silly Sophie." Kurt giggled, climbing into the back seat.

"I like Eric, daddy." Sophie giggled.

"Well Eric likes Alec." Kurt said gently.

Sophie stuck out her lower lip. "Am I not pretty enough?"

"Oh my God." Blaine mouthed from the front seat, looking at Kurt.

"No. It's the age difference, I'm sure." Kurt patted her leg and they fell silent for the rest of the drive to the theater.

"I hope she doesn't like older men when she's a teenager." Blaine whispered as they walked into the Children's Theater.

"Don't talk about that." Kurt hissed, keeping a tight hold on Sophie's hand as she stared at the costumes the little girls were wearing. "She's only six."

"It was just a joke."

"Sophia Lily, you have to hold my hand." Kurt said firmly as Sophie tried to pull away from him.

"But the pretty dress."

"Yes, I see the dress. But there are a lot of people in here and Daddy doesn't want you to get lost."

Blaine moved to Sophie's other side, taking hold of her other hand.

"We're gonna see Ariel!" she squealed happily, loud enough for several other parents to look at her and laugh.

"We sure are!" Blaine cooed. "Now you hold Daddy's hand when we go in here because it's really dark, okay?"

Kurt grabbed the tickets out of his wallet, keeping an eye on Sophie the whole time.

"Get 'em?" Blaine asked as Sophie held onto his finger and twirled herself in a circle.

"Daddy, look!" Sophie squealed.

"I see." Kurt and Blaine said together as Kurt showed him the tickets.

"Let's go in, soapy." Blaine laughed.

"WEEEEE!" Sophie squealed.

Kurt ducked down, grabbing her hand in his own and leading the three of them into the theater they would be sitting in. They gave their tickets to the woman at the end and quickly found their seats, right up front.

"How much did these _cost_?" Kurt hissed, leaning over Sophie because she was sitting in the middle.

"I figure that we saved because the twins aren't here." Blaine whispered, shrugging. He reached his hand over Sophia, grabing Kurt's hand.

"Nuh uh." Sophie shook her head, pulling their hands apart. "Mine!"

"He was _mine _first." Kurt cooed, giving her an eskimo kiss.

"Nope!" Sophie grabbed Blaine's arm, hugging it.

"Are you stealing him away?" Kurt asked, sticking out his lower lip. "I'd be very sad without my Blaine."

"We can share." Sophie said, moving Blaine's arm towards Kurt.

"I have so much say in the matter." Blaine laughed.

"You lost that say when you married a Hummel." Kurt whispered as the lights turned off.

They both looked at Sophie, who stared in awe with bright hazel eyes.

It was worth the extra money.


	55. Babies Warning: Sex Talk

"We had an _agreement_." Kurt hissed. "You get the boys and I get Sophie."

"Yes. You get to talk about loving a guy and I get to talk about girls." Blaine scoffed. "This is an unfair deal."

"Oh, come on. Don't be a wuss. Besides, I'm getting worried about Nick. He's exactly like you, Blaine. He falls hard and fast. He needs to be ready." Kurt whispered.

"They're only fifteen, Kurt. They're not thinking about sex."

"Like you weren't?" Kurt arched his eyebrow. "A deal is a deal, Blaine."

"Fine. I'll tag team them. Two in one."

"_No_." Kurt looked at him as if he'd lost his mind.

"No?" Blaine questioned.

"Well obviously it's going to be a little different for the two."

"Because Zach isn't dating someone?"

"No. Because I'm kind of wondering if Zach is _gay_."

Blaine rolled his eyes, throwing his hands up in the air. "Just because he hasn't had a girlfriend—."

"It's not only that—." Kurt interrupted.

"And he—." Blaine said over him.

The front door open and Zach walked in humming, completely oblivious of what he was walking into.

"Hey, baby." Kurt said, smiling and going to hug Zach. "How was school?"

"What'd I do?" Zach asked warily.

"Nothing. You didn't do anything." Kurt ruffled his dark curls.

"Oh… Then what did _you _do?"

Kurt pointedly raised his eyebrow at Blaine and then nodded.

Blaine heaved a big sigh. "Fine, Kurt. Fine. Zach, can we talk?"

"I told you I didn't buy those eggs from an illegal dealer. I got them from a reputable—."

Kurt shuddered and walked out, mumbling, "At least Blaine limits himself to mammals. Reptiles are so gross."

"It's not about eggs. Not about those eggs, at least." Blaine said, making his way upstairs.

"Hey now. If there are any more eggs in here they aren't mine." Zach said, following him.

"Oh my God." Blaine went into Zach's room, sitting on his bed. "Now this is going to be just as awkward for me as it is for you, but we're going to both try to be mature about this."

"_No_." Zach said from the doorway.

"Yes. Come on."

"No way. No sir. I am not taking one more step into this room."

"You think I want to be doing this? I thought I would get dinner out for winning a huge case and _your father _is all 'Fifteen sex and hormones and sons and pregnancy.' So let's just do this so Daddy will leave both of us alone."

"I've got a health textbook. It's got a full chapter on sex. There are even diagrams. I'm good."

"I guess I could tell him we—No. You're fifteen. It's time. Come on."

Zach edged into the room slowly, cringing as he sat at his desk and faced his dad.

"You look like it's going to be painful."

"It's already painful. When you start talking about it, it's going to be _torture_. Cruel and unusual punishment. It's because I said I wouldn't cut my hair, isn't it?"

"It's your hair. Do what you want with your hair." Blaine said exasperatedly.

Zach took a deep breath. "Okay. Go. Talk, I mean."

"Well you're fifteen now and probably starting to notice girls or boys—."

"_I'm straight for the millionth time_." Zach said. "Daddy's killing me with this."

"Yeah, it's killing me too. He just can't stand it. Okay, but regardless. You're probably starting to notice things and get urges. It's completely natural."

Zach covered his face with his hands, tilting his head towards the ceiling. "I don't even have a girlfriend. I am about as close to having sex with a girl as you are."

"But when it… When it happens, Zachy…"

"Oh God. Don't call me Zachy when you're talking about sex." Zach groaned.

"You're a smart boy and I know you'll make smart decisions." Blaine said, voice firm. "I just want to let you know that the things you are feeling are normal and that—." He took a deep breath. "You can talk to me or ask me questions if you have questions about sex… with girls."

Zach lowered his hands and blinked at Blaine.

"Just be safe. When it's time… Come to me. We'll get the things you need to be safe, alright? I would… I would rather you come to me about it than you come to me with a pregnant girl. Oh… Okay?"

"I don't think you need to worry about that any time soon… but… thanks." Zach said awkwardly.

"That's why we aren't going into more details. Just wait until you get a girlfriend." Blaine sighed, standing.

"Thanks, Dad… I do appreciate it… even if it's very awkward to even look at you right now."

"You think this is awkward? Imagine the first time I saw Grandpa after Kurt and I _knew _that he was aware we had had sex. Now _that _was awkward. This is mildly uncomfortable." Blaine left the room as Nicky walked by. "Hey, Nick, we need to talk."

"ABORT MISSION! SEX TALK! ABORT! MISSION!" Zach yelled.

Nick's hazel eyes widened. "Really? _Really_?"

"Yes!" Zach nodded.

"Oh God." Kurt came over and wrapped his arms around Zach.

"Daddy, why did you make him do this?" Zach whined.

"It's for your own good."

"Says the one who got to sit downstairs watching trashy TV." Blaine mumbled. "C'mon, Nick. It won't hurt."

"Too much." Zach said, voice muffled by Kurt's shoulder.

"Hey now. I've got a health book. It's got diagrams." Nick said as Blaine closed his bedroom door.

"And people say they can't believe you're twins." Blaine snorted. "C'mon. If there is anyone in the house who needs this talk, it's you."

Nick sighed and plopped on his bed.

Blaine eyes widened in horror. "You didn't disagree. Oh God. Are we too late?"

"_No_!" Nick exclaimed. "I'm only fifteen and I've not had a _serious _girlfriend. Well, not a serious girlfriend with whom I have a physical relationship with or… just… yeah."

"So you haven't…"

"I've thought about it." Nick admitted, somewhat sheepishly. "Well… I've thought about it a lot. And I might have almost did _something _but not _that_."

"Oh wow." Blaine said, tucking a leg under him. "Well Kurt was right about you needing this talk then."

"I was going to talk to Uncle Finn."

"No, no, no. We never talk to Uncle Finn about sex or girls. We stick to the list."

"The list is stupid, Dad." Nick rolled his eyes.

"The list keeps everyone around us sane. First you go to me, then David, Kurt, Grandpa, Google, Grandma, Wes, Wikipedia, and _then _Uncle Finn." Blaine said very seriously. "Never stray from the list, Nicholas."

"I didn't think that you or Daddy would be comfortable talking about it." Nick said, biting his lip.

"Look… There was a very brief time in which I thought I liked girls—."

"Yeah, yeah, Aunt Rachel, blah blah." Nick said. "It doesn't count. It lasted less than three days."

"Fair enough." Blaine nodded. "The point is, it may be a little awkward but I'm your Dad. I kind of signed up for this stuff. We both want you to feel like you can talk to us. We want you to be _safe_."

"I wouldn't _not _be safe." Nick said, not making eye contact. "That would be dumb."

"That _would _be dumb. You're right." Blaine nodded.

"I just… How do you know _when_? How did you know you were ready? You and Daddy?" Nick didn't dare look in Blaine's direction.

"Well… Daddy and I were both eighteen and in love. We had been in love a long time. It was right before his attack. We waited for him to turn eighteen and it just felt right."

"How did you know he was the one you wanted to have sex with then?"

Blaine clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth. He hadn't been expecting these types of questions. Especially not from Nick.

"I mean, people are ideally supposed to find that _one _person, you know? Well how do you know if that person is the person without… trying on the pants?"

"Trying on the pants?" Blaine choked.

"So what if you and Daddy had had sex and it had been horrible? Do you just stay with him forever even though it's… horrible? Because maybe they weren't your _one_." Nick rambled.

"Nick… not everyone only has one partner in their life." Blaine said slowly.

"But good couples do. Like you and Daddy." Nick didn't say anything, waiting for Blaine to respond. When he didn't, Nick finally looked up at him. "Unless…"

"Look. Sex is a way to emotionally connect with a person that you deeply care about. That you love." Blaine said gently. "And it shouldn't be anything other than that, but sometimes it is. But you should wait until you're sure it's someone that you feel that way about because otherwise you're going to… you're going to regret it."

"Was Daddy not… your first?"

"No." Blaine took a deep breath. "He wasn't. And you know what? I really wish he had been my first. I had sex when I was your age with someone I really didn't even know. It was a dumb decision… A really dumb decision. And I hadn't been safe. It was horrible, Nick. I've never regretted anything more than losing my virginity to someone I didn't know. Because it is important. I wish it had been something Kurt and I could have shared."

"Why did you have sex with someone else?"

"There were a lot of reasons." Blaine shrugged. "The point is that… Look, you don't have to only have sex with one person, alright? But don't just go around and have sex with people. It feels great at the time but… you've got to realize that it's big. It needs to be special. It's about being safe and sharing something with a person you love. It's not so much about the immediate gratification… That's why we have masturbation."

"I do more than think about that." Nick snorted.

"We expected as much on that end." Blaine snorted as well.

"Were you Daddy's first?" Nick asked.

"Mhm." Blaine nodded, reaching over and ruffling his hair. "Look, I don't want you to make the mistakes I did. Having sex with Kurt was and is amazing because of that connection. There are a lot of people out there who just have sex because it feels good or to just…. 'nail' another girl. Don't be that person. You're smarter than that and better than that. If you love someone, then you shouldn't feel bad about having sex with them. It's a very natural thing and it's natural to want to have sex. You just have to be careful. And safe."

"I know." Nick nodded.

"When you're ready, if you've got questions, anything… you can talk to me. I'll make sure you… have what you need." Blaine said slowly. "It might be awkward, but it beats the alternative. Daddy doesn't have the patience to raise another baby."

"We three are enough." Nick snorted.

"That's an understatement."

"You think I should wait?" Nick asked as Blaine stood.

"I think you'll know when it's the right time." Blaine said gently.

"How?"

"You can tell. You'll know you're ready when you are." Blaine promised him.

"I handled this better than Zach, didn't I?" Nick grinned.

Blaine snorted. "I thought I was going to have to lure him into his bedroom with promise of candy or something. Our talk lasted a lot longer than his."

"I don't think we need to worry about him yet."

"Oh I worry. He'd run a mini zoo out of the backyard if he could but we can barely get him out of the house." Blaine admitted.

"He talks with the team mates. He's got friends." Nick reassured him.

"Yeah?" Blaine asked.

"He's good." Nick nodded, very seriously. "Don't worry about him, Dad. He's okay."

"You okay?" Blaine asked, ruffling his hair. "Of course you're okay."

"I'm okay." Nick rested his head on Blaine's shoulder.

"Better be okay. We're counting on you to take care of us when we're older. Sophie will be too busy buying clothes and Zachy will be too busying being a vet. You better go pro soccer, son. Daddy goes through money like nobody's business."

"Psht. I've already got a lovely home picked out for you two." Nick teased. "Far, far away."

"I'm glad we didn't buy that car for your birthday yet. This is good information to have." Blaine teased right back.

Nick stood and wrapped his arms around Blaine. "You're a good dad."

"You're an okay kid." Blaine hugged him back and then pulled away, winking at him. "I love you, Pooh Bear."

"Love you too, Dad." Nicky rolled his eyes.

"I should go tell Daddy we survived." Blaine turned to leave.

"Thanks, Dad." Nick said.

"You're welcome, honey." Blaine smiled at him before leaving.

"Well?" Kurt asked as soon as Blaine made it into the empty kitchen.

"Well what?"

"What did he say?" Kurt asked.

"Pfft. If you were so concerned, you'd have given him the talk yourself." Blaine leaned over, kissing Kurt's forehead.

"Are you really not going to tell me what they said?" Kurt whined.

"Don't worry about them. Our children are fine." Blaine kissed his cheek. "They are smart and have promised to be safe when they're ready…"

Kurt let out a relieved sigh.

"But…" Blaine giggled. "Nicky was going to talk to _Finn_."

"Oh God. Doesn't he know that Wikipedia is a better source than Finn?" Kurt gasped.

"I've got this, Kurt. I gave him the list. I can handle our children, you know?"

"Well sometimes you fudge up." Kurt muttered.

"I only left him _once_, alright? At least I wasn't like Finn and left Melody in a random McDonald's. He was _at David's house_. You said you would let it go _ten years ago_."

"You forgot your child."

"Yes well in case you noticed there are three times as many as there was when we started out."

"That would technically be six." Kurt pointed out.

"Oh, shut up. You know what I mean." Blaine huffed. "You don't trust me with them. Admit it."

"You forgot your child." Kurt repeated.

"Shh. He'll hear you." Blaine whispered.

"He remembers." Nick said coming through the kitchen and grabbing a soda from the fridge. "Yo, Daddy."

"Yo." Kurt said from the stove.

"TOLD YOU HE'D SAY IT BACK! YOU OWE ME A DOLLAR!" Nick called gleefully, leaving the kitchen.

"Those are our sons you think are about to have sex." Blaine snorted loudly. "Good call, Kurt. Good call."


	56. Sophie's First Period

"Uhm… Where's Daddy?"

Blaine looked up from his paperwork. "You know he's in LA for the weekend, sweetie."

"So he won't… he home early?" Sophie asked hopefully, biting her lip.

"Nope." Blaine gave her a sad smile. "All you've got is me! But I do know how to cook! Are you hungry?"

"Uh, no, I… uhm…"

"Is something wrong?" Blaine asked, sitting up straight.

"I started." Sophie whispered, edging closer and glancing out into the living room where Zach was working on homework.

"Started what?" Blaine echoed.

"_It_. My… my period."

Blaine's eyes doubled in size and he jumped up. "Oh my God. Oh my God, what?"

"I knew you were going to freak out." She said solemnly, hanging her head.

"You started your period?" Blaine asked a little louder than necessary, but luckily Zach wasn't paying any attention. "Shit. Okay, I'm going to call Kurt. And see."

"Okay but can you hurry and figure out what to do because a diaper of paper towels is gross and uncomfortable." Sophie said, crossing her arms over her chest. "And my stomach really hurts."

"Hurry, hurry, yes, I'll hurry." Blaine said, fumbling to find his phone.

Sophie heaved a big sigh and left the room.

"_Kurt, this is an emergency and I need you to call me back like now, okay? No one's dying or anything, just call me back. Yeah. Please. Bye. Love you. But call back. Seriously._" He said as it went straight to voicemail. "Fuck. Stupid fucking fashion meetings. He might not get to his phone for hours…_Carole_!…"

Blaine picked his phone up again, dialing quickly and not even letting Carole say hello before speaking.

"Sophie started her period, Kurt's gone for the weekend, and _I don't know what to do_."

"Oh boy. I was hoping you wouldn't be the only one home when this happened." Carole teased. "You just need to go and get some pads from the store."

"Where are they?"

"There will be a whole aisle dedicated to _feminine needs_."

"Oh my _God_, this is my life. A gay man going down a feminine needs aisles. Lovely." Blaine moaned as he got into his car, putting his phone on speaker after he closed the door.

"Do not get the generic brand whatever you do. They're uncomfortable and messier." Carole said. "You should get the kind with wings and without."

"Wings?"

"Don't worry about it, sweetheart." Carole laughed. "And you'll need to get her some Midol for the cramping… oh, and I'd get tons of chocolate too."

"But what kind, Carole? I don't know what kind to get."

"As long as you don't get the generic you're okay." Carole reassured him. "But she'd probably like the ones in a prettier package."

"Yeah and those would also be a little more embarrassing to stroll across a store with too." Blaine mumbled.

"You'll be fine. If you have any questions when you get there, just call me." Carole laughed.

…

Blaine stared at the pad and tampon section (_of doom) _in horror. There were so many to choose from and what was the difference? And didn't it have to be uncomfortable basically walking around with a partial diaper for a week?

And _that _was what wings were. At least it was a smart idea, he guessed. But wouldn't it—

No. It was best not to put too much thought into anything.

"Having trouble?" A woman asked, looking amused.

"Uh… not at all." Blaine sputtered.

"Did your daughter start her period?"

His eyebrow shot up.

"When it's the wives that have started, they know exactly what to get." She explained, reaching over and grabbing two boxes before dropping them into his basket. "The ibuprofen is over that way."

"Er… thanks…" Blaine said, standing very still. When the woman left, he threw two different random, colorful boxes into the basket. After all, he could never be _too _prepared, right?

…

"Soph? It's Daddy." Blaine said, knocking on her bedroom door. He pushed it open and saw Sophie on the bed on top of two towels, talking into her phone and giggling.

"Yeah, Grandma… Okay, he's back… I'll call if I need anything… I love you too." Sophie hung up her phone and stood. "That was quicker than expected."

"Here. Grandma told me to get two kinds so I got four." Blaine held out a grocery bag. "And I've got more stuff out in the kitchen for you. And I stopped and got you ice cream."

Sophie hugged him tightly. "Thank you, Daddy."

"You're welcome, baby." Blaine said, hugging her back.

"I'm gonna go…" she lifted the bag.

"Yes. Yes. Go on." Blaine nodded. "Good idea."

Sophie went into the bathroom and Blaine wandered into the hallway as his phone began to ring.

"Hey, Kurt."

"What emergency? What's going on? Did Zach's eggs hatch into dinosaurs or something?" Kurt asked without even offering a hello. They had been together much too long. They even had the same phone etiquette—or lack thereof.

"Our daughter has become a woman." Blaine said, shuddering.

"Wait, wait… _what_?" Kurt asked.

"Sophie started her period."

"Oh my God, oh my God. Is she okay? Do I need to come home? Everything is in the hall closet, Blaine. I knew this would happen so I've had a stash for months now." Kurt rambled, barely taking breaths in-between his words. "I can't believe I'm not _there_."

"It's just her period." Zach muttered as he walked by, causing Blaine to arch his eyebrow. "What? It's not that hard to figure out. You had that freaked out 'gay man dealing with girl problems' look and Sophie searched the house for any chocolate while you were gone."

Blaine rolled his eyes and reached out, ruffling his youngest son's dark curls. He then said, rather proudly, "Your stash isn't necessary. I went out and got her stuff. I've handled this very well."

"You called Carole, didn't you?" Kurt laughed.

"Hey now. I didn't say I handled it on my _own_." Blaine laughed too as Sophie came out of the bathroom. "Hey, sweetie. Wanna talk to Daddy?"

Sophie eagerly took his phone. "Hey, Daddy! Yeah… Yeah, my stomach has hurt but I thought it was the fast food we ate yesterday… Daddy got me some… Yeah… No, don't leave. You've got work… Okay… Alright… I'll see you tomorrow or the next day then…" she giggled a bit. "Bye Daddy, I love you."

Blaine took the phone from her, smiling. "Tomorrow or the next day?"

"This conference stuff isn't taking as long as they thought it would, so I'm hoping they'll let me catch a flight at noon tomorrow." Kurt said. "Make sure that she takes Ibuprofen if her stomach hurts her too much. Rachel and Mercedes are a call away if you need anything. As is Carole, but obviously you know that."

"It's under control, Kurt. I've got this." Blaine said confidently.

"Great. I hope you handle her first pregnancy this well. Or the first time she comes home drunk. Or the first time she—."

"_Don't_. I'm hanging up now! LA LA LA!" Blaine said, holding the phone out.

"OR BUYING HER FIRST BRA!" Kurt called.

"Goodbye, Kurt! I love you!"

"DON'T THINK YOU'RE GETTING OUT OF BRA SHOPPING WITH M—and that would be my publicist looking that way he does when I do anything embarrassing. Alright. I love you too."

"Bye."

"Training bra!" Kurt chirped before hanging up.

"Bra shopping with those two my ass." Blaine muttered before hiking the stairs to check on his daughter.


	57. Cut Scene: Movie Night

"Kurt, I'm going to _kill_ you." Mercedes punched him in the arm roughly as Blaine and Wes headed off to the bathroom.

"What? He's cute. Isn't he cute? In a straight boy kind of way, I mean." Kurt rubbed his arm. "And you can't hit me. I'm injured. My lung."

"_I_may injure your lung after this, White Boy!"

"He likes you." Kurt said simply. "You said yourself you don't like any of the boy's at McKinley. So I bring you David. Only don't leave him in a room full of birthday cake. Apart from the cake thing, he's very well trained. I promise. He comes from a respectable family and he's got the same taste in music as you."

"Was Blaine up to this too?" she asked as the boys emerged laughing at something.

"No. The boy is completely oblivious to anything that doesn't concern Katy Perry, literature, or junk food." Kurt sighed.

"Kurt's buying popcorn." Blaine said cheerfully as he and David came up to rejoin their little group.

"I see who the breadwinner is." David joked.

"You see who has a daddy with money. Come with me, Blaine!" Kurt forcefully dragged Blaine into the line, wanting Mercedes and David to have some time alone to chat.

"I could kill you." Blaine hissed when they were out of earshot.

"What? David broke up with his little minx last week. And I think they'd be cute." Kurt pointedly looked at the candy, avoiding his boyfriend's eyes which he knew were probably narrowed.

"I don't know how you get these ide—."

"Shut up. They're talking. I'm trying to hear." The younger boy whispered, hitting him on the shoulder gently.

"Can we have three popcorns and some Reese's Pieces?" Blaine asked the younger teenage girl behind the counter, pulling his debit card out of his wallet despite the fact that Kurt was supposed to be paying.

"_Shush."_ Kurt swatted his arm, still trying to hear the conversation between David and Mercedes. They were laughing. That had to be good, right? He didn't know why he hadn't thought of this before. "I can't hear. And quit smiling like that. No, seriously, stop. It's weird."

"They're clearly talking about us." Blaine said, grabbing two of the popcorns.

"How do you know that?" Kurt questioned, glancing over at their friends.

"Because they're looking over here. Grab ours." He said simply and walked over to David and Mercedes, handing a thing of popcorn to each of them.

"_Because they're looking over here_." Kurt mimicked, grabbing the remaining popcorn and candy. "He thinks he's cute."

"What are we seeing again? Please not a Disney movie." David groaned as Kurt made it over.

"Kurt always makes me watch Disney movies." Mercedes sighed. "I've seen Lady and the Tramp more times than I can count anymore."

"That's nothing. When Blaine first got to Dalton a few summers ago he made us watch The Little Mermaid on repeat. And when he wasn't watching it, he would go around listening to it on his iPod and singing the songs. It wasn't as bad, though, as when Teenage Dream came out. Nonstop. Either he was singing it or playing it on repeat. He was _very_ hated on our floor." David shook his head. "I still can't listen to that song without wanting to kill the person who sings it."

"_Katy Perry?"_Blaine threw a piece of popcorn at him.

"I was just testing to see if you remembered." David responded, throwing popcorn right back at him.

"That's not as bad as when the local theater did _The Sound of Music_. I've never been so sick of a musical in my entire life as I was then. I can't hear any of the songs without cringing." Mercedes said as they talked into the actual theater. "And he listens to Adam Lambert like he's God. I can't _stand_him."

"_I hate Adam Lambert!_"

"I don't know if I like where this is going." Kurt pouted, grabbing Blaine's hand. "They're going to bond over complaining about us."

Blaine put his hand on the small of Kurt's back as they picked a row to sit in, sending a shiver down Kurt's spine. As soon as they were seated, with Kurt in between Blaine and Mercedes, Kurt leaned over and handed the popcorn to Blaine. "You should hold this. You'll eat more of it then me."

"We're in trouble, Blaine. Wesley just texted me and said we're both disowned for doing something together without him." David laughed loudly.

"I think he'll carry on." Blaine said through a mouthful of popcorn. "You didn't put butter on it."

"Gross, Blaine. On both accounts." Kurt responded, opening Blaine's Reese's Pieces.

"Ooh! I want one! Gimme one, those are mine!" Blaine said eagerly, popcorn forgotten. "Hey, you can't eat the orange ones. Those are the best!"

"Oh, fine, here." Kurt poured some of the candy into his hand and then handed the rest of the box to his boyfriend. "I'm never bringing you a cupcake home again if it makes you this hyper."

Blaine stood. "I'm going to go and butter the popcorn. Are we the only ones in here?"

David looked around and pointed. "There's two people down there. Are they having sex? The previews haven't even started yet."

"They're not having sex." Kurt scoffed. "There is no way."

"They totally are." Blaine said, leaning down to see. Then he screwed his face up. "Gross!"

"Like you've never… uh… seen it before." David trailed off at Blaine's look and sipped very loudly on his drink.

"_In a theater, Blaine_?" Kurt gaped, looking up at his boyfriend. "_Really_?"

"My popcorn needs buttered!" Blaine said loudly, whacked David upside the head, and then disappeared to go butter his popcorn.


	58. Cut Scene Voices

Kurt couldn't sleep.

It had happened a lot lately, although he hadn't told anyone. They had taken him off of his Lunesta. He wished they hadn't. He would pretend to fall asleep but, in actuality, he would be up late into the night thinking about his attack. He could still very clearly hear the attackers' voices. In fact, he could remember more now than he could right after it had happened.

The main voice was gruff and almost familiar. Almost, but not quite. One of the other voices was extremely nasally and the third voice… well, he just didn't even know how to describe the voice. It was very distinctive, though, and the memory made him shudder involuntarily.

He felt a hand on his back and heard Blaine's soft voice. "Kurt? You're awake?"

Kurt eased himself back into a lying position. "I just woke up."

An arm draped around him and tugged him close, and then he felt Blaine's chin rest on his shoulder. "You don't sound asleep at _all,_Kurt." His boyfriend raised a hand and ran his fingers through Kurt's hair while stifling a yawn.

"I can't sleep." Kurt admitted, shuffling closer to him.

Blaine resituated himself. "Here, come here. Let me snuggle you."

Kurt smiled a bit, although it was half forced, and snuggled right up to Blaine. He fit perfectly, head rested on the older boy's chest. A sense of relief swept over him and he relaxed against his boyfriend. "Thanks."

"Mhmm." Blaine said sleepily, rubbing Kurt's back.

Kurt nuzzled his chest, trying to will himself to sleep. "I'm sorry."

"Hush, you." His boyfriend yawned loudly and pulled him even closer. "You should have woken me up. I would have sat with you."

"I don't like to bother you."

Blaine looked down at him, shocked. "Hey, now, you don't bother me. Ever. Got that? I want you to come to me, no matter what it is. Big or small. You should know that I don't think you bother me."

"I know but haven't you spent enough nights awake with me over the last seven months?" Kurt muttered, looking away.

"Maybe I like taking care of you. I don't like that you're hurt or upset or can't sleep, but I like being able to be there with you. I _don't_ like that you'll sit up awake alone, though. That's sad."

The younger boy shrugged and nuzzled him again. "It's just kind of hard to get to sleep now that I'm not on the medicine, I guess… and…" he trailed off.

"And what?" Blaine gave him a reassuring squeeze.

"I keep hearing stuff. _Not like that_," he said at Blaine's bewildered expression. "Like… I keep hearing—remembering, I guess—October. I don't know if that's why I can't sleep or if it's because I'm off of the medicine."

"What do you keep remembering?" his boyfriend asked quietly, kissing the top of his head.

"Just… just their voices really. I just hear them over and over again when I'm trying to sleep. It makes it difficult." Kurt shrugged a bit. "It's not a big deal."

"Kurt… if anything is bothering you, you need to talk to someone about it. Otherwise you're just going to get upset again… I don't want this to ruin your life. I want you to move on. If that takes talking about it, that's what you should do." Blaine whispered into his hair.

Kurt didn't know what to _say_, though. What could he say? Yeah, he was upset still. He'd been attacked. He still couldn't walk too fast without feeling light-headed and out of breath. They had only had sex a few times because, although they had been given the okay by Kurt's doctor (offered up by the doctor, because there was _no way_ Kurt was asking a question like that), it made it harder for Kurt to breathe and really Blaine was just paranoid when it came to his precious Kurt. This attack was still having negative effects on Kurt's life and it had been _seven months_. Seven months and he still had to sometimes take breaks during glee club to get some water and take a breather. Like he was an old man or something.

Kurt was upset. He was upset and angry. He was angrier with himself than anyone though, because how had he let this happen? How did he let someone do this to him? How had he _let it happen_? If he was more normal, if he wasn't so out there, then maybe he wouldn't be sitting up and thinking. Maybe he'd be sleeping. Better yet, maybe he and Blaine would be having sex.

But no. Because Kurt had gone and let himself get attacked.

"Kurt… talk to me. What's wrong? Are you scared?"

"Only every time I leave the house alone." He muttered.

Blaine sat up. "What? I thought you were okay. You said you were."

"I _am_. I need to go somewhere without people attached to me. I know it. But… But I'm still kind of scared every time I turn a corner that someone is going to reach out and g-grab me and slam me into a wall and…" Kurt trailed off.

"Kurt, nothing else happened that night, right?" Blaine asked, peering into his eyes. "They didn't… they…"

"No." Kurt touched his cheek. "I promise. I would have told you. I just… I'm scared. I don't know who they are. They could be _anybody_, Blaine. Any random person on the street."

That was the root of his fears, he guessed. Every time he saw a group of men in public, he always wondered if it was his attackers. Only briefly, though. He checked the news website daily in hopes that there had been another attack and that the men were caught. Then he went into the bathroom, sat on the toilet, and cried because he was an awful person for hoping someone else had been attacked.

"I just want my life back." He finally whispered, looking down. "I want to feel safe when I'm out without you or my dad or Finn. Because when I'm with you three, I feel safe… even when I go out with Mercedes, I still feel nervous… Blaine, what if I'm in the grocery store and I _hear_ them? W-what if I hear them at the doctor's office, or when we're out to eat, or when—"

"Kurt, you can't do this to yourself. You can't obsess over it. That's what they _want_ you to do. You're going to be just fine. I promise." Blaine tilted his head up so Kurt was looking at him, much like Kurt had done a few weeks ago when he had been sick. "No one will _ever_ touch you again. I promise."

"You can't always be there, Blaine. You're not there at school. You aren't there when I walk to my car. When I'm out with Mercedes or Rachel." Kurt sighed and looked away again.

"You're never alone. Your dad and I make sure of that. When you walk to school from your car, there are tons of kids around. You walk out to your car with Rachel or Mercedes every day after glee club. But you're never alone. And it is going to _stay_ that way. For a very long time. Until you feel safe again."

"I don't even feel safe with people around. I just want to go back to Dalton and hide for the rest of my life."

"You graduate in two months. And we'll be moving soon. We'll be in Cincinnati. The attacks always happen in Lima or really close to it. We'll be away from them. You'll be able to feel safe again."

"Kiss me." Kurt whispered pitifully, pulling Blaine back into a laying position. "Please."

He felt Blaine's lips on his and closed his eyes, kissing his boyfriend back.

Kurt pulled away after only a few seconds and sighed, resting his forehead against Blaine's. "When does it get better? Everyone keeps telling me it's going to get better and I say I'm fine. Something I think I am but, Blaine, I don't feel fine now." His lip trembled.

Blaine kissed him again quickly. "You're doing so much better, Kurt. I know you can't see it, but everyone else can. Just give it some more time, okay? I promise you'll be yourself again soon."

"I hope so because I can't take this much longer." Kurt sniffled, wiping his eyes.


	59. Ch 34 Cut Scene: Melody's Birthday Party

"Where is she? Where is she?" Kurt asked, rushing into his father's house and setting a stack of presents on the coffee table.

"Take it easy, bud. She's right here." Burt chuckled, looking up. "Where's Blaine?"

"He'll be inside in a few seconds. He's arguing with work. They're trying to force him to come in even though he asked off." Kurt sighed. "They're under new management and Blaine's not taking to it too well."

"Why's that?" Burt asked.

"Because they try to take advantage of the poor thing." Carole said, coming into the room with a half asleep Melody in her arms. "They try to take advantage of all of those poor kids and Blaine's putting his foot down."

"Good for him then." Burt said. "Hey, bud."

"Hi." Blaine said, coming and standing next to Kurt.

"Well?" Kurt asked.

"Nothing. They're going to try to force someone else to do it." Blaine shrugged, but it was clear he was stressed.

Carole came over after handing Melody to Burt, hugging Kurt and then Blaine. "How was Michigan? Did you boys enjoy your little break?"

"Oh, it was great." Blaine perked right up. "It stinks that I didn't get to see Alex though."

"So he came down just to make sure they didn't head up?" Carole asked, looking between Kurt and Blaine.

"He had to come up anyway for something or other before the meeting about the money, so he just stayed a little while longer." Blaine said. "Do you care if I get a drink?"

"Of course not, hon!" Carole said, waving him towards the kitchen.

Blaine smiled and headed in.

"Look at this. I took copies because Blaine wouldn't let me steal the originals." Kurt said, pulling several pictures out of his bag.

"_Oh my God_!" Carole exclaimed. "Is that Blaine?"

"Yes!" Kurt exclaimed right back. "Just look at him!"

Carole let out an excited laugh, covering her mouth. "Blaine, you were so cute!"

"Oh God, Kurt. Are you really?" Blaine laughed, coming in and sipping lemonade. "This is amazing, by the way. What is it?"

"Minute Maid in a pitcher." Burt chuckled.

"Kurt won't let me get that. It's 'too expensive.'" Blaine said. "He buys the powder."

"It's not hard to make, Blaine. And it's _still _Minute Maid." Kurt sighed.

"But it makes me cough and I never can get it stirred enough. It's either not stirred enough or it's all watered down." Blaine complained, sitting on the couch by Burt. "I don't know what you expect from me."

"You've got some world-class problems there, don't you, kid?" Burt laughed.

"He can buy a $200 scarf but I can't get junk food. We're 'on a diet.' I call it a big problem." Blaine said, frustrated. "The second we got in from Michigan he informed me of this new diet. And he keeps _checking my car _for McDonald's bags. _When's that from, Blaine_? Kurt, how much does that shirt cost? Hmm? Isn't that new? Because it looks expensive."

"It's actually not new. Believe it or not I found it at a high-end thrift store." Kurt scoffed, sitting on Blaine's other side.

"That's the biggest lie I've ever heard." Blaine said.

"I can't tell if they're being serious or not." Carole laughed.

"It is, Blaine! I found it yesterday when Mercedes and I went shopping. Ask her if you don't believe me."

"She'll lie. You'll all lie." Blaine said, nudging Kurt's shoulder with his own.

"I'm done with you." Kurt teased, letting out a fake sigh. "Are Grammy and Grandpa coming?"

"They should be here soon." Carole nodded. "Hopefully Melody will be a little more awake by that time."

"I'll just pass her over to Kurt or Blaine. That'll wake her right up." Burt grunted, raising up. "And I've got to use the bathroom."

"I'll take her!" Kurt said eagerly, standing and carefully taking his baby sister from his father. Melody snuggled up to him, sticking her thumb in her mouth. "Are you going to talk for me and Blaine, hmm?"

Melody nuzzled his chest and let out a content little sigh, making Kurt's heart melt.

"She loves her big brother." Carole smiled, squeezing Kurt's shoulder. "Are you boys hungry or thirsty?"

"Starving." Blaine said, taking off for the kitchen.

"_Diet_!" Kurt called after him.

Blaine waved him off and, by the time Carole made it into the kitchen, had pulled the chair by the stove and was in the top cabinet where Burt hid the good stuff whenever Kurt was coming. "Where—are—they—." He grunted, hastily moving stuff.

"Back left corner." Carole laughed. "Don't fall off of that."

"Aha!" Blaine let out a whoop of triumph and eagerly tore into the bag of Double Stuffed Oreos. "Oh God, this is going to be like heaven. I haven't had chocolate in days."

"You poor thing." Carole teased. "Are you going to survive?"

"Debatable." Blaine hopped down and bit into an Oreo, letting out a groan. "_Delicious_."

Burt came in and chuckled. "Kurt's on his way in."

Blaine tossed the Oreos into the sink (which was luckily empty and clean) just as Kurt came in. "Hello, dearest."

"What did you get into?" Kurt sighed as Melody, now wide awake, petted his hair and face.

"Some of these delicious…" Blaine looked down at a bowl of blackberries. "Oh! Blackberries! Can I have some?"

"Of course." Carole said. "Kurt, do you want anything, hon?"

"No thank you." Kurt said, kissing Melody's little hand. "Mellie has gotten oh so big in this long year. You're growing up on me, silly thing."

Melody giggled and tangled her hand in his styled hair.

"And now my hair is messed up." Kurt said, kissing her cheek.

Blaine came over and fixed Kurt's hair as Melody suddenly became more interested in some of the buttons on Kurt's shirt.

"Thank you." Kurt smiled as the doorbell rang. "Grammy and Grandpa! Yay!"

Melody clapped her hands together excitedly as they heard Burt's voice, and then Kurt's grandfathers.

"_It's Grandpa_!" Kurt squealed as his grandfather made it into the room.

"Look at that big girl!" Andy said, coming over. He bent down until he was at Melody's eye level and then reached forward as if he was going to tickle her. She flailed, pushing herself back against Kurt and squealing. Andy moved his hand back and repeated the process, causing her to shriek in laughter and squeal louder each time.

"Want grandpa?" Kurt asked, making his voice sound excited as he held her out. "Want grandpa?"

Melody thrust her arms out eagerly and snuggled close when Kurt's grandfather had her safely in his arms.

"Look at that." He laughed.

"She likes to be cuddled." Carole said from the table, where she was now sitting with Blaine at her side.

"Likes is an understatement." Burt laughed as Andy gave Kurt a one-armed hug and began chatting with him.

"Where's Annie?" Carole asked.

"She was on that cell phone. Lord only knows how long it'll be before she turns up." Andy laughed. "Well hello there, Blaine. I see you're still sticking around?"

"Well I tried to leave but I didn't get very far before I got hungry." Blaine joked.

"Same thing happened to me more than fifty years ago." Andy said, winking as Annie came in.

"What happened to you fifty years ago?" Kurt's grandmother asked, wrapping her arms around Kurt in a hug.

"I was forced to remain in a relationship with you, otherwise I would have gone hungry." Andy joked.

"No. It was the children that forced you to stay." Annie sighed, moving to hug Carole and Blaine. "I hope you don't think you're getting to hog the baby, Andrew."

"I will hold my granddaughter as long as I please. " Andy responded.

Kurt made his way to table, sliding onto Blaine's lap. Blaine grunted as though Kurt was heavy although he certainly wasn't before wrapping his arms around Kurt's thin waist. Kurt leaned back against him, deciding to ignore his boyfriend's noises and mutterings.

Melody let out a sudden, loud shriek and flailed her arms as Finn came into the room, carrying a poorly wrapped present.

"Hey, Melon Head!" Finn said, waving and bending down to kiss Melody's cheek. "Mom, I'm hungry."

"Finn, you are always eating. I can't decide who is worse, you or Blaine." Kurt said right as Blaine popped a blackberry into his mouth. "Never mind. That right there just answered it."


	60. Babies Warning: Messy Children

"I AM KING OF THE WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORLD!" Six year old Nicky shrieked, running out of the front door in only Power Ranger underwear. "Hi, Daddy!"

"Where are your pants?" Kurt called after him, but his oldest son (by 4 minutes but "every minute counts, Daddy") ran behind the house without a word. "Nicky, come put pants on!"

"OKAY!" Nicky ran back around the house and rushed in the front door. "I DUNNO WHERE THEY ARE!"

"Where did you take them off?" Kurt asked. "That's where they—_oh my God_."

Sophie, who was busy painting on the wall with chocolate sauce, turned and waved at him.

"What are you _doing_, Sophia Lily?" Kurt rushed over.

"I made you a picture!" Sophie giggled as Kurt took the Hershey's bottle out of her hand.

"How many times do Daddy and I have to tell you that we don't paint on the walls?" Kurt asked sternly.

"Daddy's shirt is pretty." Sophie said, waving at him and giving him an adorable smile.

"Sophia is still in trouble." Kurt sang.

"Drats!" Sophie stomped her foot.

"Go wash your hands right now." Kurt said, pointing towards the bathroom.

"Are you gonna tell Daddy?"

"What do you think?" Kurt asked.

"Hmph!" Sophie ran off towards the bathroom.

"Blaine! Where are you?" Kurt asked, going into the kitchen. He looked around, eyes widening. "Were we _robbed_?"

Zachy, who was sitting in the corner and coloring, looked up. "Dad's asleep. Under the mess on the couch."

"W-What?" Kurt gasped.

"The couch is there." Zachy pointed. "I know it's hard to see over the laundry baskets and trash."

"_Blaine_!" Kurt shrieked, going over and pulling pillows and clean clothes off of him.

"What?" Blaine shot up. "Huh? _Oh my God, were we robbed_?"

"I tried to wake you up." Zachy shrugged, switching from a red crayon to a blue one. "You told me 'it's okay' and started snoring."

"This—mess—how? How did you—."

"Nicky lifted Sophie up and she opened the laundry room door." Zachy said as Nicky ran in, still pants and shirtless.

Blaine pushed a pile of children's jeans off of his lap and rubbed his face, trying to wake himself up. "Where are your pants, Nicky?"

Nicky pulled a pair from the pile off of the floor on. "Here, Dad! Happy now?"

"Blaine, I'm going to kill you." Kurt hissed to where the boys couldn't hear.

"Where are the dogs?" Blaine asked, looking around.

"Over there." Zachy pointed an overturned laundry basket where two dogs were trapped.

"Shit." Kurt moved over, pulling the basket off of their dogs.

"DADDY SAID A BAD WORD!" Sophie shrieked and then ran, jumping onto Blaine's lap and nuzzling his chest. "Did you have a good nap, Daddy?"

"Yeah, I—." Blaine trailed off at Kurt's look. "Sophie, making messes is bad. We can't—." Blaine yawned. "Do that."

"But Daddy said that you couldn't fall asleep and _you_ did."

Kurt quirked his eyebrow up at Blaine, scowling.

"You bring up a very good point." Blaine said slowly. "But just because Daddy does something wrong doesn't mean Sophie can."

"But I didn't do this." Sophie said. "I just opened the door."

"Then what's the problem, Kurt? Shouldn't Nicky be the one in trouble?" Blaine looked up.

"I painted Daddy a picture in the kitchen!"

"In or _on_?" Kurt asked.

"Oh no." Blaine stood, Sophie on his hip.

"Oh yes." Kurt nodded.

"No, no, no."

"I tried to wake you up, Dad." Zachy repeated.

"Yeah and when he didn't, you flooded the bathroom." Nicky giggled.

"I had to poop and I used too much toilet paper again." Zachy looked down.

"And then he tried to stop it with Sophie's Puffy."

"_Puffy_?" Sophie shrieked.

"Flooded the bathroom?" Blaine set Sophie down and ran up the stairs. "Holy_shit_, Kurt."

Nicky giggled. "It's funny 'cause there's poop."

"Nicholas, that is not funny." Kurt snapped before rushing up the stairs. He only made it five stairs up though, coming to a stop next to Blaine.

"We need to call the plumber." Blaine said, hazel eyes wide. He raised his foot, showing the bottoms of his wet jeans. "And some carpet cleaners."

Kurt turned back around, dragging Blaine with him.

"Zachary, what gave you the bright idea to stick Puffy in the toilet?"

Sophie threw herself onto the floor dramatically, letting out an anguished toddler sob.

"He looked big enough to stop the water." Zachy looked down.

"P-P-Puffy!" Sophie wailed as Blaine scooped her up.

"Missy, you are not out of trouble either." Kurt said sternly. "You painted a mural of chocolate sauce and nacho cheese on the kitchen wall."

"Yummy!" Nicky said and Zachy nodded, stepping behind Blaine so Kurt couldn't see him.

"And Nicholas, whose idea was it to empty the entire contents of the laundry room in here?" Kurt asked, looking at him.

"Well, Daddy, you see…" Nicky began.

"Was his name Nicholas?" Kurt interrupted.

"Guilty as charged?"

"P-Puffy!" Sophie tugged at Blaine's shirt sleeve, trying to regain the attention.

"Oh, pumpkin." Blaine cooed.

"No. No, Blaine." Kurt said. "She's in trouble. They all are."

"But I didn't make the mess!" Zachy protested. "I just had to go potty!"

"If you didn't hold it, you wouldn't stop up the toilet." Blaine said.

"_Daaaad_!" Zachy said, burying his face in Blaine's leg.

"Alright. Here's what is going to happen." Kurt said. "Sophia is going to go and take a bath in Daddy's bathroom since she is covered in gross cheese and chocolate. Nicholas is going to put all the laundry baskets and _dirty _clothes back in the laundry room. Zachary is going to put the clean clothes where they belong."

"And what's Blaine going to do?" Blaine asked once the children all sulked off.

"Blaine gets to clean the kitchen." Kurt said. "While I give his daughter a bath."

"Technically she's _you—_okay, I'll get on that." Blaine mumbled, leaving the room. Kurt heard him go, "Geeze, guys. If you were going to party, the nice thing to have done would have been to wake me up. At least I could have had the place cleaned before Daddy got back."

"_Blaine_!" Kurt exclaimed, coming up behind him and scooping Sophie off of the floor where she was trying to tug off her blue sandals. "I don't know what I'm going to do with all four of you."

"Can I sleep with the doggies?" Sophie asked, waving as their Nova Scotia Duck-Tolling Retriever walked past. "DOGGY!"

"Sophie, you can't sleep with the doggy." Kurt said. "Just like Nicky can't sleep on the back of the couch. I don't know why Zach is the only one in this house with normal sleeping habits."

"But I love the doggy. I loves both of them." Sophie nuzzled him. "Daddy, you just got chocolate on your shirt…"

"Of course I did." Kurt sighed, kissing the top of her head. "Boys, it better be clean down here by the time Sophie is bathed."

"Yeah, _boys_." Sophie giggled.

"Yeah, boys." Kurt cooed, kissing her cheek. "You tell 'em."

"Yeah, boys." Sophie repeated, sticking her little tongue out.

"She always gets out of everything." Nicky sulked.

"It's 'cause she's the princess." Zachy sighed as he picked up a pile of clothes.

"Just wait until she's older and has to do the dishes." Blaine winked. "Let's hurry and get cleaned so we can take a bath. If we get the house cleaned, I_think _I can talk Daddy into ice cream and a movie."

"YAY!" The boys chorused, setting off to clean up the mess.


	61. Zach Gets Drunk

"Zach, be quiet. If you don't, they'll come out to check on us and they'll know you drank at the party. We'll never be allowed out again." Nick grunted, trying to help his twin up the porch stairs.

"I don't feel good." Zach slurred, slumping against Nick. "Am I going to get into trouble?"

"Not if you be quiet. I'll just get us to your bedroom and I'll stay up with you. But be really quiet." Nick whispered as he pushed the door open.

"Busted." Blaine said, smiling sweetly. "Wasn't there a no drinking rule?"

"For the record, I didn't drink and got him home as soon as I figured out what was going on… Meaning for once I'm not the problem child."

Zach let out a pitiful whimper at that, looking wounded.

"I'm just kidding." Nick said, readjusting Zach.

Zach bent over, beginning to throw up.

"Gross." Nick scrunched his nose up.

Kurt rushed over, easing Zach away from the vomit. "Baby, you know you can't drink. You're underage."

"I didn't mean to get drunk." Zach whimpered.

"You should be drinking at all and putting yourself in that position." Blaine snapped. "I can't believe _you_ would do this, Zach."

"Blaine, just _wait_. He's sick." Kurt snapped right back. "C'mere, honey. We'll get you to the toi—let."

Zach whimpered as he stared down at his new pile of vomit, feeling dizzy. He then spoke, voice slurring more. "Daddy, I'm thirrrsty."

Nick rushed out, returning moments later with a bottle of water. "Ryan found him. He'd been throwing up a lot in the bathroom and I guess one of the girls told Ryan because they couldn't find me. I don't think he knew he was drinking alcohol, though. He'd been drinking punch… I mean…"

"Stop trying to cover for him. He's going to be in trouble." Blaine sighed.

"But… But…" Zach looked up at Kurt, opening his mouth but words not making their way out

"Come on! He would never drink this much!" Nick's voice rose. "You couldn't even smell it in the punch! He didn't _know_. If I'd known you would have reacted like this, I would have taken him somewhere else!"

Kurt, who was bent down and listening to Zach, nodded and looked up. "Blaine, he didn't know…" He looked down at Zach, who was curled at his side as they sat on the floor. "He's really clammy and pale…"

Blaine crouched down, feeling Zach's forehead. "If he didn't know, I want to know who spiked that punch."

"That isn't important right now… I think he has too much alcohol in his system." Kurt hissed as Zach violently shivered.

"Zach, wake up." Blaine said loudly when Zach's head fell forward. He shook Zach's shoulder until he opened his hazel eyes.

"Mmmh."

Blaine kissed Zach's forehead and then ran his fingers through his now sweat matted curls. "Nick got you water. I want you to drink some of it."

"I didn't mean to, dad." Zach mumbled as Blaine held the water bottle out.

"I believe you, honey."

Zach leaned against Kurt, shaking.

"Do you think he has alcohol poisoning?" Kurt whispered.

"He could. I don't know. I used to drink all of the time and I never got like this." Blaine said, looking concerned.

Zach's eyes widened and he exclaimed, "What?!"

"C'mon, honey. I'm going to help you stand up." Blaine said gently, putting his hand under Zach's elbow.

"There's no way. No way." Nick said, horrified. "You're just trying to scare us. This really isn't funny, dad."

"Calm down. You're going to scare him." Blaine eased Zach up slowly with Kurt, who was behind Zach with his hands on Zach's waist.

"No. I don't wanna go to the…the hospital. I'm fine." Zach bent, throwing up again with renewed force. He wasn't fine.

"I'm going with you guys." Nick said, opening the door.

"I don't think that's a good idea." Blaine sighed.

"I'm not leaving him alone. I'm the one that even asked him to go with me. This is my fault." Nick protested. "And I'm not leaving his side until he is better."

"Fine. Whatever." Blaine gave up, watching Kurt help Zach down the stairs and whisper reassuring things in his ear.

"I didn't know, dad."

"I hope you didn't know he was drinking because he's really sick. And if it's alcohol poisoning, he could die." Blaine said very bluntly. "People _die _from that."

"I didn't." Nick looked him in the eye, not blinking.

"Go and get in the car so we can get to the ER." Blaine locked the door.

Nick practically ran to the car, climbing into the back seat with Zach. Zach leaned against Nick when his seatbelt was on, taking a deep breath.

"You'll be alright." Nick whispered.

"Thank you for getting me out of there." Zach whispered back, voice still slurring a bit but not quite as bad as it had been.

"Sorry I didn't sooner. Sorry I even made you go to the party with me."

"S'okay." Zach closed his eyes.

Kurt, who was on Zach's other side and watching them very closely, shook Zach's shoulder. "Stay awake, Zachy."

"Did you see Ryan trip in school yesterday?" Nick asked, just to distract Zach from wanting to sleep.

Zach giggled, drunkenly and adorably. "No."

"It was pretty funny." Nick forced a smile, although he felt very sick to his stomach for even putting his twin in the position to get this sick.

"'m scared."

"Me too." Nick sighed as Zach slumped forward, head burying in his twin's chest.

"Everything's going to be okay, sweeties." Kurt promised as they pulled into the hospital's parking lot. "Don't worry."

…

"No more parties… well, for at least a month." Zach yawned when Nick plopped on his bed the next afternoon.

"I'm totally cool with that." Nick sat cross-legged on Zach's bed. "Feel better than you did before your nap?"

"My throat still hurts but I'll get over it. Daddy's being a bit unbearable."

Nick snorted. "He wouldn't be so nice if you'd _known _you were getting plastered."

"You know, I thought it tasted like _really _good punch. The more I drank the better it tasted." Zach said thoughtfully. "I'm kind of an idiot, aren't I?"

"Maybe." Nick laughed. "At least you didn't have alcohol poisoning though."

"You say that like having my stomach pumped was any better." Zach leaned back against his pillows.

"That looked painful." Nick bit his lip.

"It still hurts… my stomach and throat, I mean." Zach shuddered, looking up as Blaine poked his head into his bedroom.

"Hey, Zachy."

"Hey." Zach looked down.

"Are you going to hide in here all day?" Blaine asked.

"Well you're mad at me."

"I'm not mad." Blaine sat at the foot of the bed, facing them. "… Listen, did you know it was alcohol?"

"No." Zach looked up, into his eyes.

"I was mad when I thought you'd drank on purpose, Zach. I was more worried than anything, though. Drinking is really, really dangerous when you're young." Blaine sighed. "And you were just getting sicker by the minute. I was really afraid you had alcohol poisoning… I was scared that you might…" He trailed off.

Zach watched him.

"Listen, guys. When I was your age, I drank a lot and I did _really _stupid things." Blaine admitted. "I was in a really, really bad state of mind and the alcohol just… made it worse. And I'm afraid that you two might make my mistakes."

"I don't plan on ever drinking again." Zach shuddered. "Last night was pretty traumatizing. That hurt _so _bad."

Blaine ruffled his hair and then squeezed Nick's knee. "You never fail to amaze me, Nicholas."

"I feel bad enough without you being sarcastic." Nick frowned.

"No. I'm being serious. As soon as you found out your brother was in trouble, you got him out of there and home. Even if most people your age would have let him sleep it off and just partied… And when I was mad and trying to parent Zach, you wouldn't even let me because you knew what had happened. You wouldn't leave his side. You very well could have saved Zach's life last night." Blaine said very seriously. "You always help people, Nick. That's… That's a great quality to have. And I'm very proud of what you did last night for your brother."

"Thanks, Nick." Zach said sheepishly.

"You boys take care of each other." Blaine smiled. "Kurt and I really don't have to worry about you two."

"So…" Nick asked after a few moments of silence. "What's the funniest thing you ever did when you were drunk?"

"My children will not be hearing that story." Blaine said, very seriously.

"What's the stupidest thing, then?"

"One of the stupidest things I ever did was kissing Aunt Rachel."

"_What_?" Nick and Zach exclaimed together.

"Yeah. That same night I serenaded your father. I've actually serenaded two or three guys drunk…" Blaine laughed a bit. "Oh, and once I got a DUI after I stole David's car. Fun times."

"Grand theft auto?!" Nick exclaimed. "Awesome! I mean, that was very irresponsible of you, Dad. But equally awesome."

"Are you being serious?" Zach asked skeptically.

"Ask your father if you don't believe me." Blaine said, not even blinking. "But it wasn't all just funny stuff… Some of it was scary and stupid. I don't want you two put into positions like I was, okay? And if you're going to drink, I'd rather you do it in our home. And I want you to know that even if Kurt and I will be mad, that we'll get over it so if you ever need us when you're in any situation, you can call us."

"We know that." Zach said.

"I just… I didn't think it was so serious. I thought he just needed to get home, cleaned up, and sleep. I wasn't going to sleep. I was going to sit up with him all night to make sure he didn't vomit in his sleep and choke, you know?" Nick added.

"You did everything right, Nick." Blaine promised. "But can you boys promise to not go crazy with drinking?"

"I never want to drink again." Zach said slowly.

"I've never gone crazy drinking… I've had a beer or two before, though. But I've never got _drunk_." Nick admitted.

"We just want you two to be careful, okay? You'll always be our babies." Blaine ruffled both of their hair and then stood. "I'll try to keep Kurt from pestering you for a bit, but I can't make any promises. You know he worries about you kids."

"He's kind of smothering me." Zach groaned.

"And every time he sees me, he hugs me and tells me how beautiful of a person I am." Nick snorted. "You'd think I pulled a child out of a well or something."

Blaine rolled his eyes. "I'll see you boys at dinner time."

"Mmkay." They said together as Blaine left, closing the door behind them.

"He feels bad." Nick giggled. "We could get anything out of him right now?"

Zach jumped up, throwing open his door. "Dad!"

"What?" Blaine called.

"Can we go to the Fort Rickey Children's Discovery Zoo next weekend?"

"You. Are. Sixteen." Blaine said from the other end of the hallway.

"You yelled at me." Zach stuck out his lower lip. "When I was innocent."

"Fine, fine, fine." Blaine threw his hands into the air and teasingly asked, "Why couldn't you be normal and like concerts?"

"Probably because I came from your sperm." Zach gave him a wide grin and then disappeared back into his room, doing a little dance.

"Do I have to go?" Nick groaned.

"Did I have to go to the party?" Zach asked sweetly, plopping back on his bed.

"God. You just looked and sounded _exactly _like Dad. That was a bit creepy." Nick sighed a bit. "Fine, I'll go."

"You know, I don't see the resemblance between Dad and I." Zach said, facial expression serious. "Clearly you look much more like Dad than I do."

Nick laughed loudly. "Right. Okay. When we do those stupid walk things, people always ask if I'm adopted. The only thing I got was the eyes and the nose."

"Sorry about your luck there." Zach giggled. "At least dad thinks your nose is cute."

"You're just mad I brought you home. I don't think you've ever had so many girls near you in your life."

"Huh?" Zach raised his eyebrow.

"There were like five of them in there with you, trying to make sure you were okay."

"_Damnit_! I hate my life. I officially hate my life. Did I do anything embarrassing?"

"You know Sarah? You told her she was pretty."

Zach groaned and moved to stand. "I'm going to drown myself in the toilet now."

"She was totally eating it all up. I think you two might get married one day."

"I hate you."


	62. Babies Warning: What's A Faggot?

"Daddy, what's a faggot?" Zachy chirped, making patterns with the sugar on his the Lion King plate with one finger and dabbing a strawberry in sugar with his other hand.

Kurt nearly choked on the strawberry he was eating. "W-What?"

Zachy shrugged. "Becky said that you and Dad were faggots. What does that mean? Does it mean you're gonna turn into a fly one day?"

"Blaine, come in here!" Kurt yelled across the house. He stepped out of the room and looked at Nicky, who was on the floor and coloring. "Nicky, honey, come into the kitchen with Daddy for a minute."

"But I'm almost done with Barney." Nicky protested.

"Sweetie, come on." Kurt urged as Blaine came downstairs, looking confused. "Is Sophie still napping?"

"Yeah, I just checked on her. What's wrong?" Blaine asked, blinking at Kurt.

"Nicholas, come on." Kurt said, very gently picking his oldest son up and placing him in a standing position.

"But can I finish it later, Daddy?" Nicky asked as they went into the kitchen.

"Yes." Kurt scooped him up and placed him on a chair at the table.

"Am I in trouble?" Zachy asked, eyes wide. "I didn't mean it! Don't tell Dad what I said! I'm sorry!"

"Oh, baby." Kurt scooped him up, sat down, and placed Zachy on his lap. "You are not in trouble."

Zachy let out a relieved sigh. "Okay."

Blaine followed suit, picking Nicky up and sitting Nicky on his own lap, effectively stealing the chair Nicky had been in. "What's going on?"

"Zachy, tell Blaine what Becky told you." Kurt said calmly, stroking his hair.

"She told me that you and Daddy were faggots." Zachy said, looking down.

"She told me too! And so did Matthew and Connor!" Nicky added eagerly. "But I don't know what it means."

Kurt and Blaine looked at each other, eyes meeting. They had hoped sending their children to Riverdale, a very exceptional school known for equality, would shield them from this… at least until they were old enough to understand.

"Uhm…" Blaine said, hugging Nicky around his small waist a bit. "Did they say anything else?"

"Well Connor said that you'd touch me. Which is silly 'cause you're my Daddy and of course you'd touch me because you and Daddy like to hug us and snuggle us." Nicky said, as if it was the simplest thing in the world.

"And Becky said that I have a mommy. But I don't have a mommy, right? I just have two daddies. She said I had to have a mommy." Zachy added, looking confused. "And I don't want a mommy. Because that'd mean I wouldn't have two daddies. Right?"

"And we like you." Nicky added, nodding very seriously.

"Well we've told you boys before that we're both your daddies, but I'm your biological daddy." Blaine said softly.

'What's that mean?" Nicky asked, looking between them.

"Well, it might be kind of confusing." Kurt said quietly. "But… it takes a man and a woman to make babies… When Daddy and I decided we were ready for babies to love, so a woman friend helped us make you two."

"We've talked about this! She carried us for a long, long time." Zachy said, looking proud of himself for contributing to the very adult conversation. "I remember."

"That's right. So the friend would be your biological mother. She gave birth to you." Blaine smiled, ruffling Nicky's hair and Kurt snuggled Zachy, kissing his chubby cheek.

"But… But Daddy said that you were our bi—log—…"

"Biological." Blaine said.

"Daddy said you were our _biological_ daddy." Zachy finished, pronouncing _biological_ very slowly with Blaine.

"That means that…" Blaine hesitated, not even knowing how to put it into words for a six-year-old to understand.

"That means that our woman friend and Blaine made you." Kurt said. "The doctors took what they needed from Blaine and they put it with what they needed from your biological mother. When they put the two together, it created you babies. And then that's when she carried you."

"For a real long time." Zachy chirped.

"Such a long time. One of the two longest waits of our entire life." Blaine said, giving Kurt an appreciative look for being able to put the thoughts into words their sons could understand.

"But, Dad… doesn't that mean we _do_ have a mommy?" Nicky asked.

"No, sweetie. See… see, Daddy and I wanted babies that were our own. So we couldn't adopt. So that's why she and I and she made you. And later, Daddy and she did the same thing and they made Sophia." Blaine said slowly. "So she carried you for a while, but that's it. You came home with us from the hospital the very next day. Mommies live with their kids every day and take care of them. So she's not your mommy. You babies don't have a mommy."

"So…" Zachy said, still looking confused. "So… Daddy is Sophie's real dad and you're our real dad?"

"_No_. We are both your real dads." Blaine said instantly. "Both me and Daddy are your _real_ dads and the same goes for your sister."

"'Cause you raised us?" Zachy asked.

"Yes. And because we love you. Both of us. Very, very much." Kurt kissed his cheek. "I love my twins just as much as I love my Sophia."

"I love you too, Daddy." Zachy said, snuggling close and looking very satisfied.

"So we don't have to have a mommy?" Nicky asked, just for clarification.

"No, sweetheart."

"'Cause it's like she helped you!" Nicky said eagerly.

"Yes! Exactly!" Blaine nodded. "Exactly. She helped us get our babies, but we're the parents."

"It makes sense now!" Nicky said, looking proud of himself.

"But is that bad? Does it make us weird?" Zachy turned on Kurt's lap and blinked up at him expectantly.

"Kids are raised by all sorts of parents, honey. Melody had a mommy and a daddy, didn't she? And Dad had a mommy and a daddy. But Grandpa raised me alone, and Grandma raised Uncle Finn alone." Kurt explained.

"So… some people only have one mommy or one daddy and not the other?" Nicky asked, looking confused.

"Daddy, are they sad?"

"Some of them might be… but having one parent is okay." Kurt answered. "Same with having one mommy and one daddy. Or two mommies."

"Or two daddies?" Zachy questioned.

"Or two daddies." Blaine said, nodding.

"But… But then…" Nicky said, wiggling around anxiously. "But…"

"But what?" Blaine asked quietly.

"Then why does Becky and Matthew and Connor say that you're faggots? What's it mean?"

"It's… a very bad word that you call two men who love each other."

Nicky's hazel eyes widened, shock and confusion registering on his face. "But… But why?"

"Some people think only a man and woman should love each other." Kurt answered.

"But you're married." Zachy said simply. "You _have_ to love each other."

Blaine had to smile at how innocent his son was. "Well some people don't agree with that either. Some people would be mad that Kurt and I got married. They don't think it's normal."

"Daddy, Matthew said that… that they could take me away from you." Zachy said, tears filling his hazel eyes.

"They're taking us away from Daddy?" Nicky yelped. "Why?"

"No, no, no, no. Nobody is taking you away." Kurt said quickly. "No, honies. No."

"But—."

"No but. _Nobody_ is taking you away from me. Either of you, or Sophie. We are a family and you don't split families up." Kurt said in a firm voice that left no room for argument.

"But what if they try to put us with a mommy and a daddy?" Nick asked timidly, clearly horrified by what his twin had suggested.

"We doesn't want a mommy." Zachy said, eyes big.

"_Don't_." Blaine corrected, reaching over and tickling his foot.

"We _don't_ want a mommy." Zachy repeated. "Right, Nicky?"

"Righto, Cheerio!" Nicky giggled.

Kurt squeezed Zachy tight.

"But, Daddy, could they?"

"Come here, you two." Blaine said, standing and setting Nicky down.

Kurt stood, setting Zachy down as well. Nicky immediately came over and reached up. Kurt scooped him up, giving him a tight squeeze and whispering that he loved him.

Blaine led them into their office and looked around for a few minutes before pulling out two sheets of parchment paper. "Tell me what that name is, Nicky."

"It's mine!" Nicky chirped.

"And that's mine!" Zachy said, pointing at the other parchment in the same spot.

"Okay, good. See this line here says parent?" Blaine pointed. "And right there it says Blaine Wyatt Anderson?"

"Uh-huh." Both little boys nodded.

"And right here it says second parent. Whose name is that, huh?"

"Daddy's!" Nicky said, hugging Kurt's arm.

"This paper right here means that you are as much Kurt's as you are mine. That means if anything happens to me, Daddy gets to keep you. And if anything happens to Daddy, then I get to keep Sophia." Blaine said softly. "So we don't want you two to _ever_ worry about someone taking you away. We're a _family_."

Zachy let out a relieved sigh. "So they were wrong."

"Very wrong." Kurt said.

"I'm glad they're wrong, Daddy." Nick said, still hugging Kurt's arm.

"Oh, we don't like me?" Blaine teased.

"A little bit." Zachy giggled.

"And they can't take Sophia from Dad?" Nicky asked, reaching for Blaine.

"No, no, no." Blaine reassured them as he took Nicky from Kurt. "If anything happens to anyone, you three kids will not be split up. You will be together with one of us… But that won't happen. It's not something you two need to worry about, okay?"

"Okay." Nicky nodded as Blaine put him back down on the floor.

"Are you two still worried?" Kurt asked, kneeling down on their level.

"I just dunno why they… why they lie about you and Dad… cause I think they've said bad things and… we're not bad." Nicky looked down. "It makes me sad."

"Babe, I think that these kids are picking up things from their parents if that is happening." Blaine said, kneeling down also. "Sometimes when people aren't used to something, they don't like it. Sometimes people are just prejudiced."

"Prejudiced?" Zachy asked.

"It means they don't like that we're gay."

"What's gay?" Nicky tilted his head to the side.

"Being gay is when a man likes another man." Kurt said gently.

"But that's not bad. Why do they not like it?"

"They don't think people should be gay, so they say hurtful things like what they said to you." Blaine answered. "Prejudice is just ignorance. We hoped that you boys wouldn't have to put up with this."

"We're sorry." Kurt said, wrapping an arm around each of them.

"So they just don't like it?" Nicky questioned.

"Yeah. They just don't like it." Blaine nodded.

Zachy shrugged and snuggled under Kurt's arm. "We like both of our daddies."

"We _might _just like you guys too." Kurt teased.

"We sure put enough money into getting you." Blaine laughed. "But we saved on the end. Two for one deal."

"You chose to think it was two for one." Kurt rolled his eyes. "I remember the extra charges they tacked on."

"Huh?" Nicky tilted his head again.

"We love you." Blaine laughed again, choosing not to get into technicalities. They weren't quite old enough to understand that yet anyway. "We love you a lot."

"And we don't want you boys to listen to anything mean that people say." Kurt added, lowering his hands and then poking each of their noses. "Because we don't care what they think. We have a perfect family, Blaine and I love you boys and Sophia very much, and as long as we have each other nothing else matters. They can't touch us or you kids. You're ours. You may not like it when you're fifteen and grounded, but you'll always _be _ours. Okay?"

"Promise?" Zachy asked, eyes big.

"Pinky swear." Kurt said, linking pinkies with Zachy.

"You can't go back on a pinky swear." Nicky said very seriously.

Blaine ruffled his hair, nudging him from the room.

"Dad, Sarah's parents are getting a divorce and you and Daddy were yelling loud last night. Are you two gonna get one too?" Nicky asked as Kurt and Zach followed.

Blaine choked and began coughing, not stopping until Kurt smacked him on the back several times.

"No, sweetheart." Kurt said smoothly as Blaine tried to remember how to breathe. "Sometimes Dad and I like to exclaim our love for another through yelling."

"It sounded like you love God." Zachy said thoughtfully, causing Blaine to giggle.

"Blaine…" Kurt said threateningly.

"You're the screamer, not me." Blaine whined, dodging Kurt's hand which was aiming for his head.

"Blaine! Don't say stuff like that in front of the kids!" Kurt called after him.


	63. Babies Warning: Saturday Mornings

"I WANTED THE BLUE ONE!"

"BUT THE BLUE ONE—IT'S MINE AND I HAD IT FIRST!"

"DADDY!"

"DAD!"

"DADDY!"

"DAD!"

"Oh my God, what time is it?" Kurt moaned, not able to find the energy to lift his head off of Blaine's chest.

"'Dunno, but I don't have pants on." Blaine mumbled sleepily. "Move."

Kurt whined and rolled off of Blaine, curling up and pulling the pillow over his head as Blaine tugged sweat pants on over his boxers.

"DADDY! DADDY! DADDY!"

"DAD! DAD! Hey, are you two alive? What if they're dead?"

"They're not dead, stupid!"

"Hey! I'm not stupid! DADDY!"

"Daddy's sleeping!" Kurt called.

Blaine rubbed his eyes and grabbed his phone, turning it on. "It's five."

"At night?" Kurt gasped, shooting up.

"No. In the morning." Blaine got out of bed and pulled open the bedroom door. "Hello, children of the corn."

"Daddy, does that mean we're evil?" Zachy asked, tilting his head to the side. "Uncle Finn said that the children of the corn are very bad kids."

"I wanna be evil!" Nicky chanted, running into the room. "Time to wake up, Daddy!"

Kurt pulled the pillow over his head, blocking out all noise. That didn't stop Nicky from repeatedly tapping his elbow though, which made it hard to go back to sleep.

"It's Saturday. Why are you two awake?" Blaine yawned, turning on the light.

"'Cause Nicky woke me up." Zachy said, reaching up.

"Oof, c'mon Munchie." Blaine said, scooting his youngest son up. "Nicky, why did you wake Zachy up?"

"'Cause I was awake and he's my twin." Nicky said, as if it were the simplest thing ever. "Daddy, Daddy, Daddy!"

"Baby, Daddy has an important meeting this afternoon and needs his rest." Blaine sighed.

"But it's morning, Dad. That means it's time to wake up and brush teeth and eat breakfast! But we already decided that Sophie gets the last of the Fruity Pebbles because it's almost empty and it's her favorite."

"We have such sweet little boys." Kurt cooed, forcing himself into a sitting position.

"I WANNA OPEN THE NEW BOX FIRST!"

"NO WAY! THAT TOY IS MINE! YOU GOT THE LAST ONE!"

"Or not." Kurt fell back onto the bed. "There was motive behind it. They really are your offspring."

"Hey, I'd let you have the toy if we were young enough to eat the kind of cereal that has toys."

"Daddy, you eat Fruit Loops all the time." Zach pointed out.

"Shh." Blaine said, waving his hand.

"I knew it! I knew the kids had help!" Kurt pointed. "You are supposed to be eating that Special K cereal."

"I am not a dieting _woman_." Blaine scoffed.

"Special K is not for _women_. It's a healthy cereal with vitamins and—."

"BLAH BLAH BLAHHH!" Blaine left the bedroom.

Nicky giggled and ran after him.

"I'll eat Special K, daddy!" Zachy chirped.

"Zachy, you'll eat anything that fits in your mouth."

Zach puffed out his cheeks, reminding Kurt of Blaine so much that he had to reach over and press a loud and obnoxious kiss to the top of his head.

"It's because you're just like your daddy."

"Does that mean I have to go on a diet?" Zachy whined.

"You couldn't go on a diet if I promised you that you could live in Disney World if you stuck to it." Kurt shook his head.

"DAD, THAT TOY IS FOR KIDS NOT DADDIES!" Nick yelled from the kitchen. "DADDDDDDY! DAD STOLE MY TOY!"

"That's my toy!" Zach yelled, stumbling from the room. "You got the last one!"

Kurt fell back against the bed, pulling his pillow over his head. Maybe with Blaine, Nick, _and _Zach out of the room he could go back to sleep.

He had just dozed off when he heard a faint squeak of the door. Figuring it was just one of the dogs, he nuzzled his head against the pillow until he felt a cold finger prod the small of his back.

"Mmmmh if you tickle me, Blaine, I'm taking away all blowjob privileges for like a month." Kurt mumbled, pulling the pillow off of his face.

"What's a blowjob, daddy?" Sophie squeaked, moving the pillow aside and plopping on his chest.

"Yeah, daddy. What's a blow job?" Blaine asked, coming in.

"Something you won't be getting for a while." Kurt groaned. "Three kids. Really? What were we thinking?"

"Love and some junk. I dunno." Blaine teased as the twins ran in, hopping on the bed.

"Oh Saturdays." Kurt sighed, puling Sophie close and snuggling her. "Blaine, will you make me some pancakes?"

"Nope. Sorry. But you know Special K is a healthy alternative with vitamins and calcium and—OW! You can't hit me in front of the children." Blaine yelped.

"You should eat Taco Bell a few more times a week. It'll cushion the blow." Kurt smiled sweetly.

"Yeah well if you'd eat more Special K maybe you'd turn into a vitamin since you're so obsessed with them."

"Can daddy turn into the Flintstone one?" Sophie chirped.

"No but soon Dada over here is going to look like Fred Flintstone." Kurt smirked.

"Guess that makes you Wilma." Blaine said.

"Wilma is a girl." Kurt rolled his eyes.

"Well your other options are Dino, Barney, or Bam Bam and I'm pretty sure Nicky's got Bam Bam taken."

"BAM BAM! BAM!" Nick yelled, tearing from the room with Zach running after him shrieking, "YOU CAN'T TAKE THE TOY!"

"Twins, they said. Boys, they said." Kurt curled into a ball Sophie wrapped in his arms. "I tried to divorce them all, Soph, but Blaine's a lawyer and what he really had me sign was a prenup. I was misinformed. I also never read the fine print."

Blaine rolled his eyes. "You cried like a baby when you found out it was boys."

"Tears of fear, Blaine. They were tears of fear." Kurt yawned. "Lock the door so they can't come in."

Blaine heaved a big sigh. "I'll get up with them on my _one _day to sleep in because I am a good husband."

"Love you." Kurt mumbled into the pillow, smiling when he felt Blaine kiss the back of his head. "The McDonald's gift card is in my wallet."

"I can't believe you would insinuate—."

"Just take it and go."

"Love you, my love." Blaine sing-song.

"Yeah yeah yeah." Kurt waved his hand. "You boys have fun."

"Hashbrowns are a go!" Blaine declared as he closed the bedroom door to cheers.

"Hashbrowns?" Sophie shot into a sitting position. "I wanna go! I wanna go!"

"Fine, fine fine. We're coming, Blaine! Just let me get dressed." Kurt called downstairs, climbing out of the bed. "But if one freaking paparazzi takes my picture this early in the morning, we are suing. I haven't even washed my face yet."

"Daddy's pretty without face wash." Sophie giggled. "Daddy's pretty all the time."

"You just talked yourself into two new dresses." Kurt pointed, beaming. "At least I raised one of you right."


	64. Babies Warning: Sick

"Blaine… Oh my God, someone answer." Kurt moaned, sitting at the kitchen table — well, really half laying on it.

Finally someone answered, the receptionist beginning to prattle off her thing.

"I need to talk to Blaine Anderson-Hummel." Kurt said, not even letting her finish.

"He's with a client now. Can I take a message?" The woman asked cheerfully.

"He doesn't see clients before noon. He's doing paperwork." Kurt snapped. "He's not answering his cell phone. Connect the call."

"May I ask who is calling?"

Kurt banged his head on the table—and that really wasn't the brightest idea he'd ever had. "His husband."

"Alright!" The woman said, and he heard the call being connected.

"Blaine Anderson." Blaine said, sounding falsely cheerful.

"Come home."

"Kurt? You sound horrible." Blaine said, lowering his voice. "Are you okay?"

"I'm sick. The kids got me sick. Nick's been puking for half an hour. I just got him into bed and now Zach is taking a cold bath. I have a fever of 101.6. Please come home." Kurt whimpered. "Sophie isn't even awake yet but I can tell she doesn't feel good because she's wheezing still."

"Oh my God. I'm on my way, Kurt. Do you want me to bring anything home?"

"No. Please just hurry. I don't know how long I can _not_ be in bed." Kurt said.

"I'll get there as fast as I possibly can and I'll call David and make an appointment for you since the kids went yesterday." Blaine said. "I love you."

"I love you too." Kurt hung up the phone and forced himself into a standing position, making his way into the children's bathroom. "Zachy, baby. Feeling better?"

"My throat hurts." Zachy rasped. "And I'm hot."

"I know, baby. I know." Kurt sat on the edge of the tub and closed his eyes momentarily, running his fingers through Zachy's wet curls. "Blaine's coming home from work."

"DADDY!" Sophie wailed from her bedroom. "DADDY!"

"I'm fine, Daddy. Get her." Zachy said.

"_Don't fall asleep_. I'll be right back, okay?" Kurt stood and attempted to move quickly to Sophie's room across the hall, but that didn't work well for him. "Lovey, I'm here."

Sophie reached up from her crib, tears running down her chubby cheeks.

Kurt leaned down, slowly pulling her out of the crib and trying to ignore his pounding headache. "It's okay, love. It's okay. Daddy's here."

Sophie continued to cry, sound muffled by Kurt's pajama shirt.

He poked his head back into the bathroom. Zachy was still sitting up and awake, cheeks still too rosy for Kurt's liking. "Baby, do you want to get back in bed?"

Zachy nodded, standing.

Kurt leaned down and grabbed Zachy's underwear and shorts with the hand that wasn't holding Sophie, setting them next to the tub with his towel. He sniffled a bit. "Be careful. The floor's a little wet."

Zachy carefully climbed out and dressed himself, shaking like a leaf despite the fact that he said he was hot.

"Get in my bed with Nicky, okay? We're all going to stay together."

_Because there's no way I can make it back and forth to all of these rooms without collapsing, _he mentally added.

"I'm going to get Sophie's medicine and I'll be right back."

"Okay, Daddy." Zachy nodded, shuffling down the hall and making his way into Kurt and Blaine's bedroom.

"There we go." Kurt put Sophie in her high chair and went to the counter, trying to make out whose medicine was whose. "We need Daddy home, baby."

Sophie whined, letting out a cough.

"Okay. Here we go. Miss Sophia Lily." Kurt said, putting the medicine cup on the counter.

"I'm home. I drove way too fast, but I'm home!" He heard Blaine call.

"In here." Kurt called.

Blaine rushed in and over to him. "Kurt, I'm so sorry."

"You left before I was awake. You didn't know." Kurt sniffled.

"What are you doing? Let me." Blaine said, grabbing the medicine cup.

"It's on the bottle." Kurt leaned heavily against the counter, tilting his head up.

"Go get in bed."

"I don't think I can make it there alone."

Blaine got Kurt to the kitchen table, sitting him down. "Is the medicine for Sophie?"

"Yeah." Kurt nodded, laying his head on the table.

"Have the twins had theirs?"

"Not yet." Kurt whimpered. "I've been back and forth between everyone's rooms all morning."

Blaine rubbed his shoulder. "I'll get you to bed."

"Get them taken care of first." Kurt moaned.

"Daddy!" Sophie whined.

"I'm getting it, lovebug. Daddy's getting it." Blaine said, making his way back to the counter and pouring Sophie's medicine. "I need you to drink it all up, okay? It'll make you feel better."

Sophie scrunched up her nose, attempting to spit the medicine out.

Blaine covered her mouth. "No you need to swallow it, baby."

Sophie did so, giving him a dirty look.

"The pink one too, Blaine." Kurt raised his head.

"Okay." Blaine nodded, going and finding the pink bottle with Sophie's name. "Is it just the pink medicine and cough syrup for all of them?"

"Mhmm. But Zachy has something else too just because of his ear. The darker pink one."

"Alright." Blaine came back up to Sophie.

"It's the yummy one." Kurt said tiredly, watching them.

"No!" Sophie shook her head.

"Baby, it tastes like cotton candy. Remember?" Kurt asked.

Sophie hesitated and then opened her mouth.

"Good girl." Blaine said as she licked her lips after drinking it. He laughed a bit. "Was that one yummy?"

Sophie nodded, reaching up.

"I'll get her in bed, get their medicine, and come back for you." Blaine said, scooping her up and then kissing Kurt's forehead.

"Did you call David?"

"He's going to come by on his lunch. If we need to go sooner, though, he said that he would take us right back."

"I can wait." Kurt said, laying his head back on the table again. "They're in our bed."

Blaine headed off, coming into the bedroom. He eased Sophie on the bed and then gently eased Nick into his arms.

Nick wrapped his arms around Blaine's neck, pressing his forehead against Blaine's chin.

"You sure are being quiet, pooh bear." Blaine said, making sure to walk very slowly with him to the kitchen to not upset his stomach.

"Tummy hurts." Nick mumbled.

"The medicine should help your tummy." Blaine reached the kitchen and sat him down at the table, going over to the counter.

"Daddy's sleeping." Nick said, giggling a bit.

"Daddy's sick too." Blaine frowned.

"Is it our fault?" Nick asked, frowning also.

"Of course not, pooh bear." Blaine poured both of his medicines into medicine cups and brought them over. "Real quick. Go, go, go!"

Nick very slowly took the cups, tilting his head back. He then poured both of them into his mouth, screwing his face up. "Gross!"

"I know but it will help you feel better. Do you want me to carry you to bed?"

"I can go." Nick climbed down, padding down the hall to Kurt and Blaine's room. Seconds later Zachy emerged in only shorts, rubbing his eyes.

"I was just about to bring you medicine, Zachy." Blaine said, turning around with his medicine cups. "Where did Daddy leave the thermometer?"

"On my bed table."

"Nightstand?" Blaine laughed a bit, handing him the cups.

Zachy took the medicine and wrinkled his nose adorably. "Back to bed?"

"Yeah. Can you make sure there's room on the bed for Daddy?" Blaine asked, ruffling his hair.

"Okay."

Blaine eased Kurt out of the chair and cradled him to his chest tightly as he followed Zach back to the bedroom, being careful not to bustle Kurt too much. Kurt was _burning up_. It made him feel worse than he already did for going to work.

When he made it to the room, Nicky had Sophie pulled on his lap and Zachy had pushed the blankets all the way back for Blaine.

"Thank you, loves." Blaine said, easing Kurt down.

Sophie crawled over, immediately climbing onto Kurt's chest. Kurt raised his arm instinctively, wrapping it around her and holding her in place.

"Alright." Blaine said, starting to feel a bit terrified. He had a sick husband, toddler, and twins that were relying on him. Usually when more than one kid was sick, he and Kurt would tag team. He'd never done anything like this before.

Kurt began to cough loudly, shaking his entire body.

_It's not going to turn into anything, _Blaine tried to calm those thoughts. _It's a cold. He's getting medicine tonight. It's okay._

"I'm going to get the thermometer, take temperatures, and get Tylenol." Blaine thought out loud.

"Dad, can I have ice cream? My throat hurts." Zachy asked, eyes big.

"And Daddy was going to get me Sprite to help my tummy." Nick added.

Sophie just nuzzled Kurt's arm, wrapping her own tiny ones around it and falling asleep.

"I'll be right back." Blaine nodded, leaving. He muttered to himself as he left. "Thermometer, Tylenol, ice cream, sprite. Thermometer, Tylenol, ice cream, sprite. Thermometer, Tylenol, ice cream, sprite."

By the time he made it back into the room with his hands full, Kurt was sitting up.

"You're awake?"

"I feel even worse." Kurt whimpered.

"I'll see if Wes can watch the kids and we'll go now."

"No. I can wait." Kurt fell back against the pillows, coughing loudly.

"What do you need?"

"Tylenol and orange juice." Kurt took a deep breath and rubbed his forehead. "Please."

"Okay."

"C'mon, Zachy." Kurt took the thermometer from Blaine.

"Let me do it." Blaine set the other stuff down and took it again. "Just lay down."

"You can't do this on your own. There's three of them."

"And you make four. Lay down." Blaine said firmly.

"You're being unreasonable."

Zach reached up, grabbing the thermometer and popping it into his own mouth.

"100.9. That's a little better." Kurt said after Blaine took it from Zachy.

"He still needs the Tylenol." Blaine sad, mostly to himself.

"Can you get the rubbing alcohol?" Kurt asked.

Blaine went into their bathroom, looking around.

"Bottom left drawer." Kurt coughed a few seconds later.

Blaine opened the drawer, pulling it right out and taking it to him. Kurt disinfected the thermometer, shook it off, and popped it into Nicky's mouth.

"He didn't have a fever before but he's getting a little warm it looks like." Kurt explained.

"Please just let me do this." Blaine said, nudging him into a laying position and then giving Zach his Tylenol.

"It's too much."

"If it gets to be too much, I'll call Wes or Rachel."

Kurt nodded, pulling the covers up and shivering.

"Your orange juice and Tylenol. Crap." Blaine said, taking the thermometer out of Nick's mouth. "Still good."

Kurt handed Blaine the rubbing alcohol before rolling on his stomach and nuzzling his pillow.

"Is Daddy okay?" Zachy asked, patting Kurt's shoulder.

"Daddy's going to be just fine. He needs sleep." Blaine promised as Kurt let out the tiniest of snores. Kurt only snored when he was sick. _Fuck_. He knew Kurt was sick, of course, but that made it more urgent. "Just like you babies. Lay down."

Zachy curled up to Kurt's side, face pressed into Kurt's back. Kurt rolled over, opening his arms. Before he knew it all three kids were in them.

"My arm is going to be very tired at the end of this." Kurt coughed, blinking his eyes open and looking at Blaine.

"Once they're _out _out, I'll move them." Blaine promised. "I'll be right back with your orange juice and grown up Tylenol… unless you want grape flavored."

Kurt rolled his eyes, smiling a bit when Blaine kissed his forehead. "Thank you, Blaine."

"You're welcome, Kurt."

Two Days Later…

Blaine came out of the bathroom early in the morning, a towel wrapped around his waist. His skin was much paler than normal and he had dark circles under his eyes, making his hazel eyes look much rounder than normal. He let out a half cough that turned into a whimper.

"_Kurt, I hate you…"_

Kurt, who had just finished getting ready for work and was about to leave, looked up and dropped his bag. "Fuck."

How had he not seen this coming?


	65. Babies: Thunderstorms and Playtents

"DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAADDY! DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAADDY! DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAADDY!"

Kurt and Blaine both shot up in bed, sleepy and disoriented.

"DADDY DADDY DADDY!"

Blaine looked down at his blanket that was moving… and speaking to him?

"Daddy, I'm scared!"

"Sophia, we know it takes Daddy at least two full minutes to remember his name when he's abruptly woken up." Kurt cooed as he got out of bed and made his way around it, bending down and picking up his four year old daughter.

Sophie screamed as lightning struck outside and shuddered when it started to thunder, burying her face in Kurt's neck.

"It's just a thunderstorm." Kurt said soothingly, rubbing her back with one hand as he turned the bedside lamp on with the other.

"Nicky and Zachy are gone. They can't cuddle me." Sophie whimpered.

"You three cuddle during thunderstorms? Blaine, how did our kids get so cute?"

Blaine let out a yawn and glanced at the alarm clock.

"Incoming." Kurt said before carefully dropping Sophie into his lap.

"What's this?" Blaine asked, poking her nose. "I don't think I've ever seen one of these before."

"This isn't funny, Daddy." Sophie pouted. "I'm Sophie."

"What is a Soap-y?"

"Daddy!" Sophie giggled a bit, but then buried her face in Blaine's stomach when there was a loud rumble of thunder.

"Who is this child and why is she calling me Daddy?" Blaine teased, winking at Kurt.

"Blaine, stop. You're going to make her cry." Kurt snapped, getting back in the bed and rubbing Sophie's little back. "Just ignore your mean Daddy, Sophie. He doesn't know any better."

Sophie nuzzled Blaine's shoulder and then wedged herself in-between Kurt and Blaine. "It's storming."

"I know, monkey." Blaine ran his fingers through her chestnut colored hair. "But the storm is outside and we're inside."

Sophie let out a shriek as the bedroom door slowly opened, clinging to Kurt.

"Damn dog." Blaine mumbled as Kreacher hopped onto the bed. "Isn't it time for him to kick the bucket yet?"

"_Blaine Wyatt Anderson-Hummel_!" Kurt whacked Blaine's shoulder. "Don't say stuff like that!"

"Bad doggy! Bad doggy!" Sophie said, adorably wagging her finger at Kreacher. "Bad doggy."

Kreacher bounded over, walking up to her and licking her face.

"Good doggy." Sophie giggled, petting his back.

"Traitor." Blaine tickled her tummy. "We Anderson-Hummels are supposed to stick together."

"But he's fluffy." Sophie said, scratching behind Kreacher's ear. "Why would he kick a bucket? Do you mean the cleaning bucket? Can dogs clean?"

"I wish. It would be nice to have one person less to clean up after." Kurt mumbled.

"Hey now. I cleaned everything yesterday."

"It would have been nice if you could have done it three days ago since you're on vacation." Kurt said in a sing-song voice. He then ruffled Sophie's hair. "Baby, let's try to get some sleep."

"But… But the storm is scary." Sophie frowned.

"When you wake up, the storm will probably be over." Blaine leaned down and kissed the top of her head.

"It's loud, though." Sophie let out an adorable sigh and hugged Kreacher tight enough to make him squeak.

Blaine sighed as well and slid into a laying position, opening his arms wide. He then grinned and, in a low voice, said, "Come!"

Sophie giggled and crawled onto Blaine, lying on his chest. "That's a scary voice."

"When you have little boys, different voices are a necessity. You should hear Kurt's grasshopper voice." Blaine said, draping his arms around her and squeezing her tight. "You're stuck here."

"The storm can't get me?" she asked, raising her little head up.

"No, ma'am." Blaine quickly shook his head. "It'll get to daddy first. Cause his hair is generally so tall."

Kurt rolled his eyes. "If you didn't cut your hair every three weeks it would take over your _head_, babe."

Sophie burrowed her face under his arm as it thundered again.

"I know what to do!" Kurt said, jumping up.

"What are we going to do?"

"I'll be right back!" Kurt ran off.

"I have no idea what your father is doing." Blaine said in response to Sophie's confused face. "But the last time he ran that fast was to get out of the rain in a McQueen sweater, so I bet it's something good."

"Come to the living room!" Kurt yelled from the other room.

Blaine set Sophie on the floor and crawled out of bed as their power went off.

"Daddy!" Sophie yelped.

"Daddy's right here." Blaine soothed as he took her hand. "Come on. We can still see."

Sophie walked ahead quickly, squealing a bit when Kreacher zipped past her.

"It's okay." Blaine laughed as they made it into the kitchen. "Oh, God. Kurt!"

"I need help." Kurt grunted, tossing several sheets onto their couch.

"Daddy, did you lose your brain?" Sophie asked, eyes wide.

"We're going to make a playtent!" Kurt said, clapping his hands together.

Sophie let out a happy shriek, bouncing up and down. "REALLY? REALLY AND TRULY?"

"Really and truly!" Kurt nodded, looking almost dizzy with excitement.

"Awesome!" Blaine cheered, running and unfolding a tent. "This is the best idea you've ever had. Besides the whole getting married thing, of course."

Kurt rolled his eyes. "Sophie, give Blaine and I a few minutes and we'll be all set up! I already brought out your favorite toys."

Sophie clapped her hands and sat on the little chair that Burt and Carole had brought for her especially, kicking her legs out excitedly.

"Do we have any more candles than these two?" Blaine asked as he helped Kurt pin up two sheets

"I thought we did, but I guess not." Kurt answered, pinning the next sheet up. "Sophie, sweetie, there is a flashlight on the floor by your chair. Push the big red button."

"This was a very good idea, Kurt." Blaine nudged Kurt as he walked by.

"I've been known to have a few as you pointed out." Kurt nudged him back, laughing as Sophie turned the flashlight off and on.

"Done!" Blaine declared, gathering all of the pillows off of the chairs and the couch.

"WEE!" Sophie squealed, jumping onto the pillows as soon as they were set on the floor.

Blaine crawled in behind her, looking up at the ceiling. "I always wanted to make one of these when I was little."

"Dad would make them when I was sick and we'd stay in it either until bedtime or until I felt better." Kurt said, bringing some of Sophie's stuffed animals and then crawling into the tent as well. "The twins are going to be so jealous when they see this."

"The twins won't be back for two days." Blaine pointed out.

"This is too awesome to take down after the storm is over." Kurt laid down and pulled Sophie to his side. "Do you like your tent, Monkey?"

"Uh huh." Sophie nodded, sticking her thumb in her mouth.

"Ah ah." Blaine popped her mouth out while making a popping noise. "What are we gonna do, Soapy Sophie? This is _your _playtent after all."

"I wanna tell a story!" Sophie said, pushing herself into a sitting position. "About the _dinosaur _that lives under my bed!"

"There is not a dinosaur under your bed." Kurt said, rolling his eyes when Sophie was looking the other way.

"We can't put a stopper in her imagination." Blaine said through closed teeth.

"She told a news reporter than we keep people in the basement." Kurt said right back.

"It was a leading question."

"She told Grandma and Grandpa that we have Naked Thursdays."

"That's one lie I wish was true. For me and you, you know. Not the kids too. That'd be a little weird."

"Blaine." Kurt elbowed him.

"And then he was like ROAR and he ate Nicky's head off!" Sophie cut in, climbing between them as the storm raged on outside.

"Monkey, the twins are at Wes' house." Blaine interrupted.

"That's where the dinosaur is! Oh my _God_!" Sophie shook her head and gestured with her hands.

"I thought it was under your bed." Kurt remarked.

"He likes to go back and forth. Ask Uncle Wes." Sophie huffed, crossing her arms over her chest. "You're messing up my story, Daddy."

"What color is this dinosaur?" Blaine questioned, looking very interested.

"Blaine, you're going to turn her into a psychological liar." Kurt hissed.

"It's okay. We can say she gets it from my part of the family." Blaine shushed him.

"It's purple with orange polka dots. And it has a lizard tongue and breathes_bubbles_." Sophie babbled, completely unfazed by the thunder that was rumbling. "And it only speaks French!"

"It speaks? Really?" Blaine asked, impressed.

"Sweetie, dinosaurs don't speak French. They're extinct." Kurt explained in a firm voice.

"But Betty does." Sophie protested. "She only talks around kids though. She doesn't like mommies and daddies."

Kurt resigned, laying his head on Blaine's shoulder. "She better become a writer and not a liar, Blaine. If she turns into a liar, you get to handle things when she starts sneaking out to see boys when she says she's going to Rachel's for girl advice."

"Betty sounds like a child predator." Blaine whispered in Kurt's ear.

"Shut up!" Kurt said, giggling a bit.

"It's true." Blaine giggled a bit also and waved one of Sophie's stuffed animals in her face. "What are the chances this turns into a bedtime story?"

"Okay. As soon as she finishes the story, we're going to get her to sleep." Kurt whispered discretely as he kissed Blaine's cheek. "I've got work in seven hours meaning I have to wake up in five."

"What a good story!" Blaine clapped when Sophie took a bow.

"Was my bow good, Daddy? I've been practicing." Sophie chirped.

"It was excellent. You'll have to show everyone when I have my next show, won't you?" Kurt said, gently pulling her onto his lap.

"Let's get to bed, monkey." Blaine said.

"Can we show Grandpa the tent?" Sophie asked, unable to stop a yawn from escaping.

"I'll take a picture of you in it tomorrow and send it to Dad." Kurt promised.

Sophie nuzzled his shoulder and gripped Blaine's wrist as he began to him, fingers running through her messy hair.

"Five… four… three… two… _one_." Kurt mouthed exactly three minutes later when Sophie's head drooped.

"How do you do that?" Blaine asked, staring at him in awe.

"The nose twitch." Kurt said simply. "Her nose always twitches exactly five seconds before she conks out."

"And all this time I thought you had daddy superpowers or something. I don't feel inferior anymore." Blaine grinned.

"Oh, you're inferior." Kurt teased, leaning over and kissing him sleepily.

"Gee, thanks." Blaine drawled.

"Anytime, Blainers." Kurt winked before sliding into a laying position and holding little Sophie close.

"I enjoy how you just turned into Wes there. He'll be pleased." Blaine commented¸ lying next to them and pulling both of them close.

"I'll hit you for that comment when our daughter isn't in such close proximity." Kurt yawned.

"I'm holding you to that, Kurt." Blaine winked. "Night, Kurt. I love you."

"Goodnight, Blaine. I love you too." Kurt rolled his eyes.

"How come you wouldn't let me build a fort out of sheets at our wedding?" Blaine asked, sitting up.

"Not this again." Kurt closed his eyes. "Those sheets were too expensive to risk messing up. We'd still be paying it off if we'd ripped them."

"Katy and I abhor you for that."

"I guess you and Katy will have to get over it." Kurt shrugged a bit. "Good_night_."

"I mean, it would have been symbolic of—."

"Good night, good night, good night." Kurt sang.

"It's _our song_."

"I'm married to a fourteen year old girl." Kurt sighed.

"At least I'm young and pretty—Ow!"

"Good night."


	66. Warm Milk

"But no Daddy! We can't goes to bed!" Nicky protested as Blaine scooped both Nicky and Zachy up off of the living room floor where they_ had _been busy coloring.

"Daddy is going to be getting home _very _late so Dada is going to have to get you to sleep tonight. He said to tell both of you that he loves you and he'll see you in the morning when you get up." Blaine said cheerfully, heading towards the bathroom. "And now it's time to brush your teeth!"

"Daddy brushes teethies with us." Zachy said, frowning as Nicky gave Blaine a confused look.

"Hey now. It's okay. Dada will sleep in tomorrow morning so Daddy can do the morning routine." Blaine laughed, sitting both boys on the floor and then turning the water on.

"Daddy does the toofbrush voices." Nicky said, blinking up at Blaine.

"Well Daddy can do toothbrush voices tomorrow." Blaine said, holding Nicky a blue toothbrush and Zachy a green one.

"Dat one is Nicky's." Zachy said, swapping toothbrushes with his twin.

"I miss Daddy." Nicky whispered loudly when Blaine looked away, as if Blaine couldn't hear them without seeing them. Blaine watched Zachy shrug in the mirror, looking just as perplexed as Nicky did.

"And this is why Kurt and I have a set routine. The boys don't like change." Blaine said to himself, as they brushed their teeth. "All done! It's bedtime!"

"Daddy reads, Dada." Zachy said, grabbing Blaine's hand and tugging it. "Daddy reads."

"It's a good thing Dada knows how to read too then, isn't it?" Blaine laughed, holding his other hand out for Nicky to take. "What are we reading?"

"Giraffe one!" Nicky squealed excitedly, bouncing up and down. "Giraffe one! G_iraffe onnnne_!"

"Alright, I think we'll go with the giraffe one." Blaine smiled and came to a stop next to their bed. "Nicky in first and then Zachy. C'mon, babies."

"Not a baby." Nicky protested as Blaine sat him on the bed.

"Scoot scoot." Zachy said when he was on the bed too. "Dada has to be in the middle."

"Yeah, Dada." Nicky nodded eagerly, scooting until he was against the wall. "Daddy sits in the middle."

"Sounds like a plan to me!" Blaine said, plopping on the foot of the bed and crawling between them. "And look at that! _Giraffes Can't Dance _is conveniently right here!"

"It's our favorite." Zachy giggled.

Blaine sat the book on his lap and then opened his arms, letting both boys snuggle on. Zachy's head immediately nestled under his arm and Nicky's head rested on Blaine's stomach. It was clear even this was planned to the T. Blaine raised his arm at a slightly awkward angle to avoid smothering either child, he dramatically cleared his throat and began to read—having to smile at how adorable it was when his sons giggled.

"'_Gerald was a tall giraffe whose neck was long and slim. But his knees were awfully crooked and his legs were rather thin_.'" Blaine read, before turning a page.

"Look, Dada! He's jumping." Nicky said when Blaine turned the page, pointing to the giraffe.

"He sure is. That's a lot higher than _I _could jump." Blaine said, prompting more loud giggles. "Shh, shh. You're just trying to distract me so you can stay up later. I'm on to both of you."

"Dada, you see Daddy?"

"I guess that depends how late he gets home." Blaine said, slouching a bit so that both of his sons were lying down. "Now shh so we can finish the story and go to sleep."

"Aww man." Nicky said, but snuggled right back up and looked back down at the book.

The giggles became quieter and less frequent by the time Blaine had reached the fifteenth page and he looked down to see Nicky fast asleep, thumb in his mouth. Zachy was still curled up, his own thumb in his mouth but still awake—and not looking very tired, either.

"Aren't you sleepy?" Blaine whispered, sitting up a bit.

"Wait for Daddy." Zachy nuzzled Blaine's side.

"Baby, we can't wait for Daddy." Blaine said softly, stroking back some of Zachy's dark curls. "You'll get to see him in the morning."

"B-But…" Zachy frowned. "Daddy…"

"Shh, shh." Blaine said, stroking his hair. "I'm here."

Zachy's lip trembled.

"Here, here, let's finish the story. Okay?" Blaine whispered, trying to take his mind off of Kurt's absence. "Don't get upset. We'll finish the story, alright?"

Zachy sniffled. "Will Daddy be home?"

"I don't know, my love." Blaine kissed the top of his head and wiped his teary eyes. "But either way, I'm _right _here. Okay?"

"O-Okay." Zachy sniffled again and stuck his thumb in his mouth, snuggling back up and looking at the book.

"Here we were…" Blaine said after fumbling through the pages. "_'Excuse me!" coughed a cricket who'd seen Gerald earlier on. "But sometimes when you're different, you just need a different song_.'"

"Daddy likes the cricket." Zachy said softly.

"Yeah, Daddy likes loud and annoying things." Blaine teased, yawning before beginning to read again. He hadn't been tired before sitting down to read, but the boys really did have a comfortable bed and he'd been up since four in the morning and…

…

Kurt yawned as he closed the front door behind it twenty or so minutes later, double checking to make sure he had locked it. He tossed his bag and jacket lazily onto the couch and kicked off his shoes before heading towards the bedroom to find Blaine.

As he was walking, though, he saw that the twins' bedroom light was still on.

"How did I know he'd let them sleep with him?" Kurt shook his head, smiling a bit. It wasn't until he walked past that he saw Blaine curled up on the twin's bed, fast asleep with Nicky. He came into the room, smiling even more, when his youngest twin shot up.

"Daddy!"

"Zachy, why are you awake?" Kurt asked, very proud of himself for _not_having shrieked at his son's sudden movement. He had _thought _both twins were asleep, but evidently that wasn't the case.

Zachy just reached his arms up, hazel eyes wide.

"Honey, did you ever fall asleep?" Kurt asked gently, reaching down and scooping him up.

"Nuh uh. I waiting." Zachy said, fingers playing with the collar of Kurt's shirt.

"Waiting for what?"

"Daddy." Zachy nuzzled his shoulder.

"Ah." Kurt kissed the top of his head. He had a feeling he knew just why Zachy would have waited up. "Dada would have gotten you warm milk if you'd asked him too, baby."

"Can't sleep without _Daddy_." Zachy protested.

"Honey, sometimes Daddy might not be home to put you to bed." Kurt said as he carried Zachy into the kitchen.

"I can wait up a long time." Zachy said as Kurt sat him down.

"Little boys need a lot of sleep so they can be big boys one day." Kurt said, getting a glass and the jug of milk.

"Dada didn't do the cricket voice." Zachy looked down.

"That's because he doesn't know it." Kurt winked. "Besides, Dada can't get his voice that high even if he tried. I like to call my voice a gift."

Zachy giggled as Kurt put the newly poured glass of milk in the microwave.

"Dada fell asleep during the bedtime story."

"Watching you two while alone is tiring. I can see why he would fall asleep." Kurt teased. "You know, it used to be the other way around. I would sleep all day and Dada would have to get me up."

Zachy giggled again as Kurt handed him his warm milk, taking a big gulp.

"You must be sleepy. It's almost eleven. That is way past Zachary's bedtime."

"Is Dada gonna sleep with Nicky and me tonight, Daddy?"

"Oh, no. Daddy's going to get him up." Kurt promised. "Dada might accidentally snuggle you two to death."

"I'm ready for bed now." Zachy yawned, holding his empty cup out for Kurt and looking so much like a toddler Blaine that it made Kurt smile. After all, he had seen pictures. Zachy looked _exactly _like Blaine—eyes, nose, mouth, curls, everything. There was a reason Finn and Burt called Zachy his mini me.

Kurt set the cup on the table and rested Zachy against his chest, carrying him to his bedroom. "Blaine, get up."

"Mmmmmh." Blaine moaned.

"Wake up." Kurt laughed quietly and shifted Zachy's weight onto his other side, trying not to laugh loud enough to stir Nicky out of his sleep. "You're in Zachy's spot."

"Mmoh." Blaine sat up, rubbing his face. "Sorry, Zachy."

"S'okay." Zachy murmured, eyes drooping dangerously low as Kurt laid him next to Nicky on their big boy bed. He snuggled up to Nicky and let out a soft snore.

"Mmmh did he fall asleep?"

"He was waiting for me." Kurt said, leaning over Zachy to ruffle Nicky's hair and kiss his forehead. "He likes warm milk before bed, by the way. It soothes him."

"So that's why he looked so horrified when I told him I was putting him to bed." Blaine said, realization hitting him.

"I love my babies." Kurt kissed Zachy's forehead as well and then stood up straight, holding out his hand. "Now let's get my biggest baby to bed."

"I am not a baby." Blaine scoffed quietly as Kurt led him from the room.

"Says the one who was sleeping in a child's bed and fell asleep reading a children's story…" Kurt teased and then gave Blaine a wink when Blaine looked at him. "If you're a good boy, I'll help you change clothes."

"I was a very good boy tonight, Kurt. I got your children into bed and everything. I did a pretty damn good job too."

"Except for the fact that one of your children didn't go to bed…"

"That's just a technicality." Blaine waved his hand. "Meaning I got a 50% for getting both in bed and a 25% for getting one to sleep. 75% is an acceptable grade."

"I have to admit it does things to my heart when I see the twins snuggled up to their Dada like that." Kurt said, kissing Blaine.

"Mmmh, I can do other things to your heart if you'd like." Blaine grinned mischievously.

"Someone's not so sleepy now." Kurt giggled as Blaine undid his pants. "Alri—_ooh_. I'm okay with this."

"Good. Now shut up so I can remind you why you married me." Blaine smirked and pushed Kurt's dress pants down.

"Those are expens—_okay, shutting up_."


	67. Babies: Happy Mother's Day, Carole

"This is going to be so good. She's going to just _die_." Blaine said happily, getting both of the twins' car seats out of Kurt's Navigator.

"Shh." Kurt held his finger to his lip before pulling out a cake. "She might have a window open."

"Hey, Finn!" Blaine whispered excitedly, rushing up the porch steps. "Is she up?"

"She's moving around but she hasn't come out yet." Finn grinned down at the sleeping infants.

Kurt rushed past Blaine and Finn silently, cake and streamers and a gift balanced in his arms.

"Let me help, bro." Finn grabbed some of the streamers and began stringing them up in the doorway as soon as Kurt had placed them down.

"Kurt! Blaine!" Melody yelped, coming into the room.

"Hey, pumpkin!" Blaine put a finger to his lips and hugged her.

"_Awww, they're cute_!" Melody squealed, jumping up and down before bending down to coo at the twins.

Burt came in, blinking at all of them in a half asleep, half confused way.

"Surprise!" Kurt exclaimed in a whisper.

"I think your baby just gave a surprise in his diaper." Finn muttered as Melody smacked him.

"Burt, why on Earth are you standing in the doorway? I need to make Melody some break—." Carole moved around Burt, hand flying to her mouth.

"SURPRISE!" Kurt, Blaine, Finn, and Melody exclaimed together.

"You _four_!" Carole exclaimed, tears filling her eyes. "Burt, did you know about this?"

"Nope." Burt said, face breaking out into a smile.

"We couldn't tell him." Kurt said, rushing to hug her because he was closest. "He would have been acting suspicious if we had. Happy Mother's Day, Carole."

"Thank you, sweetie." Carole touched his face, unshed tears still in her eyes.

"Would not have." Burt grunted, hugging Kurt when he let Carole go.

"Oh my _God!" _Carole said, hugging Finn tightly and then whacking his shoulder. "You and Rachel lied when you said you were visiting her dads, weren't you?"

"Why are all you women hitting me?" Finn grumbled, rubbing his arm. "Happy Mother's Day, Mom."

"And look at _you_! This is your one day off and you must have driven through the night!" Carole pulled Blaine into a hug.

"Don't worry about that! It's Mother's Day! We had to see you!" Blaine smiled and then reassured her, "I'm taking a personal day tomorrow to recover from the drive anyway… Because I can totally take off when I want to now. It's _fantastic_."

Kurt rolled his eyes. "His promotion hasn't gone to his head or anything."

"I've got so much more authority now that it's _amazing_. And the DA told me that if I worked hard enough I could have his job in ten years. Not that I want it. That'd be ridiculously time consuming but it's just—." Blaine flailed his hands. "I love being a lawyer."

Burt laughed loudly.

"You four. I can't believe this." Carole said, bending down to hug Melody. "Did you help with this, young lady?"

"Uh huh, momma. I kept you up late with the movies so you'd sleep in." Melody gave a mischievous grin.

"I would have been fine with the flowers you all sent and the beautiful picture you painted me, Mellie." Carole said, brushing back Melody's hair.

"We weren't fine with that." Kurt said. "You're special to us and we wanted to show you."

"Plus, we brought the gift of grandbabies." Blaine said, pointing at the twins who were fast asleep in their car seats. "Zachy isn't as restless as he used to be since he got the tubes put in his ears. He'll just cuddle with you for _hours_."

"And Nick just sleeps." Kurt shrugged one shoulder. "And sleeps… and sleeps… and sleeps."

"That's so not fair, dudes. Bella cried for the first two years." Finn complained. "I don't think she slept."

"They've got good babies." Carole bent down by the car seats, voice practically cooing. "Oh, those little button noses. How long before the next one?"

"In three months we'll start the process again. Well, the… erm… physical process." Blaine said. "Kurt, not _we_."

"Twins and a third baby. You two are gonna have your hands full." Burt shook his head. "You sure you wanna do it so soon?"

"Well it was in the contract before we even had the twins. We could back out but we just… don't want to." Kurt said, bending down by Carole. "We figure we've still got more love to give to another little baby."

"All of you going to New York and taking these beautiful babies with you. Bella's getting so big. It breaks my heart to not see them more." Carole admitted, giving them a sad smile.

"Hey, I'll build you a house in our back yard." Blaine offered.

"We don't have a back yard." Kurt pointed out.

"Not _yet_ but they'll start building the new house soon." Blaine shrugged. "Want us to add on a few more rooms?"

"YES!" Melody jumped up and down. "Please, please, please!"

"I don't think Dad is cut out for New York City, Mel." Kurt laughed. "But we're going to visit more. Blaine gets more paid time off, I'm in this whole transition thing until this contract goes through with my new management and… we miss you all too."

"Lots." Blaine bent down, hugging Carole again. "Especially me_…_ You do miss me the most. Right, Carole?"

"Oh, you." Carole kissed his cheek. "I think you've lost weight."

"Kurt told me if I didn't lose twenty pounds, he was leaving me." Blaine made his eyes big.

"Like I have control over what he eats." Kurt rolled his eyes. "And where am I supposed to go with twin babies, huh?"

"We have an extra room." Melody squeaked.

"Hey, you!" Blaine play snapped. "They're mine!"

"Sharing is caring, Blaine." Melody said, facial expression serious.

"Fine. Carole can come back with me."

"No!" Melody yelped, throwing her arms around Carole's legs.

"Sharing is caring, Melody." Blaine winked.

"Is it time for the boys to leave yet?" Melody pouted as Kurt, Blaine, and Finn laughed.


	68. Hyper Blaine

"_Weeeeeeeeeeees_!"

"Shut up, Blaine."

"_Wesley_!"

"Oh my God." Wes pulled a couch pillow over his head.

"It's noon. Why are you sleeping?" Blaine asked cheerfully, sitting on the arm rest.

"You have been up for 46 hours. Why _aren't _you?" Wes questioned.

"'Cause I just feel _great_! The sun came out. It's an _awesome _day." Blaine yanked the pillow away from Wes.

"Blaine, why are you acting like a seven year old who ate an entire chocolate cake?" Wes pushed himself into a sitting position. "Did you take drugs or something? How many times have we discussed this? If either of the three of us experiment with drugs, we do it _together _so David can videotape it."

"Psht." Blaine rolled his eyes. "I didn't do drugs. That would be bad."

Wes stood and made his way towards Blaine's bedroom.

"Hey! No!" Blaine yelped, stumbling off of the couch and chasing after him.

"Holy. Fucking. Shit." Wes said. "Did you drink all of those?"

"It's okay. I don't feel like my heart's going to explode anymore." Blaine reassured Wes, patting his shoulder. "And I stopped shaking like two hours ago."

"Was the shaking from your presentation or the Monster and NOS that is now coursing through your veins?" Wes asked.

"I wasn't worried about the presentation. I was worried about the essay exam which went amazing."

"So you're telling me that you drank enough energy drinks to cause you to have chest pain and shake?"

"Define chest pain." Blaine giggled, plopping on his bed. He then rose up, pulling a Monster can from underneath him and tossing it into his trash can across the room. "_Scoooore_."

"Okay, Blainers. You are aware that your tiny body cannot take that much caffeine, correct?"

"It seemed like a good idea at the time and frankly I'm not convinced it wasn't. Apart from the fact that I feel like I keep randomly going numb but it's okay. says that's a common side effect." Blaine rambled.

"Blainers, Blainers, Blainers. You are like a fluffy, hyper sheep right now." Wes said.

"This is like _the best_. I totally want to do jumping jacks or—or—or… I don't know. I mean, I'd _totally _love to have sex now but Kurt's like thirteen hours away and my hand just isn't doing it lately and he won't get naked on Skype because of that incident with you that one time and you're really just ruining my life, okay? You are ruining my life."

"I think it's your shedding head that is ruining your life." Wes snorted. "Kurt would have your head if he saw your hair this long."

"Not if he saw the curls. He _loves _the curls. Wanna know a secret?"

"Do I have a choice?"

"Nope." Blaine sang, kicking his feet out. "I think if I didn't have curls, we never would have dated. It's what makes me a keeper. That and he likes having power over me because I'm so whipped. Whipped like whipped cream. Do we have whipped cream?"

"Alright." Wes said, pulling him into a standing position. "Have you eaten?"

"Nah. I don't need food. I've got _all _the energy I need for two weeks."

"While that is probably true, food will help that get out of your system faster." Wes dragged him out. "Now don't do anything too funny unless you record it with your phone, alright? This is the kind of stuff David doesn't want to miss."

"I WANNA TALK TO KURT!" Blaine exclaimed, grabbing his laptop and running back into the living room.

"Make sure you tell him I had nothing to do with this." Wes laughed, heading into the other room.

"Hi, boyfriend!" Blaine chirped when he connected on Skype with Kurt.

"Oh my God. What happened to your _head?" _Kurt gasped without a greeting.

"I'm fine, thanks." Blaine giggled.

Kurt tilted his head, eyebrow arching. "Are you okay?"

"I just said I was fine, Kurt." Blaine said, rocking from side to side cheerfully.

"Are you drunk?"

"On _looooove_." Blaine crooned.

Kurt grabbed his phone and began typing.

"Whatcha doing?"

"Texting Wes." Kurt said. "Who did you drink with? I thought you had a presentation and an exam today."

"I'm not _drunk_, silly." Blaine dramatically sighed. "Unfortunately I haven't drank in over a month. It's really amazing considering most of the kids I am in study group with are alcoholics, but whatever. I like to be above the influence. That way the dog doesn't talk to me."

"Kreacher?" Kurt questioned, looking worried.

"No. That dog in the drug commercial." Blaine looked at him as if he was insane for not just _knowing _this.

"Blaine—."

"You know? The guy is smoking and the dog comes in—."

"Sweetie—."

"And then they argue because he's stoned—."

"Babe—."

"It's the stupidest commercial ever." Blaine said. "That is why I am above the influence, Kurt. If I saw a dog like that, I think I'd—."

"_Blaine Wyatt Anderson, would you stop babbling?" _Kurt interrupted.

"You could have just asked nicely." Blaine stuck his lower lip out. "Hey, Kurt, can we have Skype sex?"

"Wes said you went are currently overdosing on energy drinks?"

"It's _completely _fine. I can breathe okay now." Blaine waved his hand. "Anyway, about that se—."

"As in before you couldn't breathe earlier?" Kurt asked again.

"What are you _wearing_?"

"We're on a screen. You can see what I'm wearing." Kurt said, smacking his forehead. "God, I knew I shouldn't have let you go to Harvard two years ago."

"I'm discovering myself and blah blah blah more inspiring words from pamphlets I didn't read about going to school." Blaine rolled his eyes. "I don't want my experience to be as boring as those bloody pamphlets."

"Bloody?"

"If you can belong to the royal family when you're drunk, I can use the word 'bloody' when I'm caffeinated. Back to you being sexy. Is that freckle on your shoulder still there?"

Kurt ran his fingers through his hair, blinking at the screen.

"This is a serious question, Kurt."

"Yes, Blaine. My freckle is still there. They tend to be permanent things."

"I wish I could kiss it. And then kiss down your chest and stomach and— Wes is right behind me. God, go away, Wes. You're such a cock block." Blaine whined.

"I cockblock you because you cockblock me. If you'd let me get laid, I'd let you attempt phone or Skype sex." Wes said, tossing a plate carelessly onto the desk. "Eat."

"You're supposed to watch him." Kurt said, looking past Blaine through the screen.

"It's not my fault that he thinks that it's okay to overdose on energy drinks. He's _fine_."

Blaine began looking around, clearly confused. "Who is fine?"

"Kurt. He's a nice piece of ass." Wes joked, earning an elbow in his side. "_Fuck, Blaine_."

"That ass you're objectifying is _mine_." Blaine huffed.

"Okay, sweetie." Kurt said gently. "I want you to do something for me, okay?"

Blaine nodded slowly.

"You don't have class tomorrow and soon you're going to crash from all that caffeine." Kurt explained. "So I want you to eat dinner, drink plenty of water, get in bed, and watch some TV until you fall asleep."

"But I'm not tired at _all_." Blaine protested. "And I wanted to talk to you."

"I want you to call me as soon as you wake up so I know you're well rested and okay, alright?" Kurt continued. "Can you do that for me, babe?"

"It's not fair." Blaine pouted, prompting a loud snort from Wes. "Stop it, Wes."

"Sorry, Poodle Head." Wes teased. "At least he took a shower before talking to you, Kurt. I guess he had to get the gel out. But his hair when it's been slept on and not washed—_hilarious_. I'll get you a picture tomorrow."

"I would actually_ really _enjoy seeing that." Kurt said. "I mean, it got pretty bad a few times over the summer but—_oh my God! Blaine!"_

"I'm okay." Blaine said from the floor, attempting to untangle his legs from the desk chair. "I'm okay."

"Did we learn something, Blainers?" Wes asked, kneeling to help Blaine up.

"Desk chairs are not your friend."

"Close enough."


	69. Blaine's Bad Day

"I thought you were picking up cat and dog food today. We only have enough left for maybe tomorrow and—are you—oh god. You're in bed in your pajamas, watching a movie, and it's not even five. Did someone die?" Kurt asked, coming to a halt once he reached his and Blaine's bedroom.

"No." Blaine sighed, stuffing a chip into his mouth and not looking up from the television.

"Are Oreo _and _Kreacher cuddled up with you?" Kurt rushed over, putting the back of his hand on Blaine's forehead and then touching his cheek. "You don't feel sick."

"'m not." Blaine said, mouth full. "Ba'day."

"Why did you have a bad day?" Kurt asked, glaring at Blaine's gelled hair since he could not run his fingers through his hair. "What happened?"

"Got a B on my midterm in American Lit. Got a B minus on a paper in my focused writing class. I spent _hours _on that paper and—poof. My A in the class is gone." Blaine sulked. "And then this woman almost cut me off—like I need another wreck, right? And I was going to go get food for the pet's but Wes called me to tell me that we can't go to that concert because the tickets sold out within two minutes. Then, on my way to get the food, I ran out of gas and David had to bring me some."

"Oh, honey…" Kurt said, rubbing his arm.

"Then I realized I hadn't done the reading for my class tomorrow so I went to get my textbook out of my bag. But evidently I left it at the library when I was working." Blaine continued. "Then Burt called to ask if I wanted to go to the big Buckeye's game with him this Saturday but nobody can take my shift at the bookstore. _Then _I was watching this dumb Lifetime movie—don't judge me—and guess what came on?"

"What?" Kurt asked, squeezing his shoulder.

"My grandmother's latest campaign ad. The emphasis? _Family values_. Ha!" Blaine shoved two chips into his mouth. "Worst. Day. Ever."

Kurt kicked his shoes off and climbed into bed. "Let me behind you."

Blaine sighed and sat up straight, scooting forward.

"Good." Kurt climbed behind him and began to massage his shoulders.

"You're amazing. Have I mentioned that?" Blaine asked, leaning his head forward.

"You'll still get A's in those classes. I'll go and get the food for Oreo and Kreacher later. You will be fine if you don't have the reading done _once_." Kurt reassured him, rubbing his shoulders.

"I really want to go to that game." Blaine whined. "Burt and I haven't had a free Saturday off together to go to a game in almost two months."

"You, dad, and your bonding. It's very cute." Kurt kissed the back of his shoulder. "There will be more games. As for the campaign commercial, don't worry about it. There is literally nothing that you can do. We agreed that we weren't going to think about them even if the commercials pop up."

"But family values? Really? They essentially ran their oldest son out of the country and they've completely disowned me _for being gay_. Show me family values."

"Shh. We aren't thinking about your family." Kurt repeated. "We are past that."

"Puh. Family values." Blaine mumbled again, rubbing Kreacher's tummy. "They don't even know what family is."

"Shh, shh, shh." Kurt kissed the back of his neck. "I would suggest bringing you ice cream but I see the empty tub right there."

"That you do. I finished the Oreos too. Sorry." Blaine leaned back until his back was pressed to Kurt's chest.

Kurt slid his arms around Blaine's waist, hugging him close. "If it'll cheer you up, babe, we can go out to eat and for dessert. And a movie? I'll even see that scary one you want to see with you. Does that sound good?"

"Can we cuddle some first?" Blaine asked, curling up.

"I would never deny the snuggle bunny a chance to cuddle." Kurt kissed his neck. "I love you, Blaine."

"Love you too, Kurt." Blaine said, rolling to face him and burrowing his face in Kurt's chest. "Thanks."

"You're very welcome, sweetie." Kurt kissed his forehead. "Now hush and snuggle me."


	70. Last Visit Before the Attack

"Why are you up so early?" Burt grunted when Kurt made his way downstairs at nine in the morning on a Saturday.

"Blaine got to Westerville last night. He's on his way here now." Kurt chirped, grabbing a muffin off of the counter, and sat at the table, letting out a content sigh.

"How long has it been since you've seen him?"

"Thirteen days and ten hours." The response was immediate and Kurt blushed. "I mean I don't know. Maybe two weeks?"

Burt chuckled. "How is he liking school?"

"He likes it a lot. He's met a lot of—." Kurt trailed off when his phone buzzed and then he ran out of the house, leaving the front door open.

Burt leaned back to look out the door, seeing Blaine half lifting Kurt up off of the ground as they hugged and kissed. Kurt let out a loud laugh as Blaine stumbled, nearly dropping him, and then they both kissed again.

"They are too cute." Carole said, coming into the kitchen and smiling.

Burt grunted a bit, although he couldn't deny it was very nice to see Kurt acting like a normal teenager in love.

"Hello, Blaine." Carole smiled as Kurt dragged Blaine into the kitchen.

"Hi, Mrs… Uh…"

"I've told you several times to call me Carole." Carole smiled again.

"Hi, Mr. Hummel." Blaine waved with the hand that wasn't tightly holding Kurt's.

"Hello, Blaine." Burt smiled. "What are you two getting up to today?"

"We're going to watch a movie and then we'll decide what we do later." Kurt grabbed Blaine a muffin and then dragged him up the stairs.

"You don't even want to talk to them for a bit?"

"You came to see me." Kurt gave him a sweet smile.

"I missed you." Blaine leaned forward, kissing Kurt.

"Mmh. I missed you too." Kurt touched his face, still smiling. "Did you see your parents this morning?"

"No. I had dinner with my mother and grandmother last night, though." Blaine shrugged a bit.

"How was that?"

"Nothing out of the ordinary." Blaine gave a smile that didn't quite meet his eyes and then kissed Kurt again. "I know you want to watch a movie, but all I want to do is kiss you."

Kurt giggled as Blaine kissed along his jaw.

"I miss when we were only a measley hour and a half apart." Blaine grinned as he pulled away. "You taste delicious."

"I wonder if you taste delicious?" Kurt asked, feigning innocence. "It's been a long time. I've kind of forgotten."

Blaine tilted his head as Kurt began to kiss his neck, closing his eyes. "Do I pass the test?"

Kurt nipped at his neck before pulling away. "Yes, Blaine. You do."

Blaine giggled this time. "I bet I taste better laying in the bed."

"Mmmh. I bet you do." Kurt grinned and gently pushed Blaine onto the bed.

"That is so hot." Blaine breathed out as Kurt lay next to him.

"I could say the same thing about you." Kurt rolled onto his side, facing Blaine.

Blaine rolled onto his side as well, scooting close enough to slide his leg between both of Kurt's.

"I miss seeing you every day." Kurt admitted as Blaine scooted even closer.

"I miss seeing you every day too." Blaine kissed the corner of Kurt's mouth. "But it makes it better when we do see each other, don't you think?"

Kurt kissed him back and then snuggled up to him, pressing his back to Blaine's chest. Blaine draped an arm over him, snuggling even closer. "How is school?"

"It would be better if you were there." Blaine stuck his bottom lip out in a pout.

Kurt leaned up, kissing his pouting lips. "That was an excellent answer."

"It just sucks that after next weekend when you visit me, we won't see each other until October probably." Blaine sighed. "I'm going to miss you so much."

"Well maybe something will happen and you'll get to see me sooner. If an assignment got moved back, we could at least spend half a day together like today. Unless you want to see your parents, which I'd completely understand, because you always see me and not them and—."

Blaine interrupted him with a quick kiss, smiling. "More making out and less talking?"

Kurt laughed. "More making out and less talking."


	71. Blaine Teaches Melody How to Dance (Ish)

"Blaine, do I _have _to go to the wedding?" Six year old Melody asked from the top of the stairs, glowering down.

"Melody, honey." Carole sighed. "He's here to watch you, not listen to you be bad."

Melody crossed her arms over her chest and sat on the top step, glaring at the wall stubbornly.

"You had fun at Rachel and Finn's wedding, pumpkin. Why wouldn't you want to go?" Blaine asked as Carole rolled her eyes, grabbing her purse.

"'Cause I don't wanna." Melody said, sounding eerily like Blaine imagined a younger Kurt sounded.

"Well then you simply can't be Kurt's little sister because a little girl who was lucky enough to be related to the fabulous Kurt Hummel would _never _turn down an opportunity to look her best in front of tons of people. And you also can't be Finn's little sister because anyone awesome enough to be related to Finn Hudson wouldn't turn down _free cake_." Blaine said, leaning over the banister from the bottom of the stairs.

Melody let out a sigh, resting her elbow on her knees and her chin on the palm of her hand.

"Goodbye, Melody. I love you." Carole called up the stars.

"Bye, momma. I love you too." Melody said, not moving from her position at the top of the stairs.

Blaine heaved himself so he was dangling over the banister, his arms over one side and his legs over the other.

"Whenever I do that Daddy yells at me." Melody chastised him.

_Definitely Kurt's sister_, Blaine thought to himself. "Yes, but I'm twenty four. I can do what I want."

"Well I'm only six." Melody sighed.

"It might make David sad if you miss his wedding. You're his flower girl." Blaine said, sliding so he was sitting on the bottom step.

"Can't he find another one?" Melody asked, dramatically tossing her body back until she was laying flat on her back, her feet dancing off of the first step.

"I don't know, sweetie. It's pretty short notice." Blaine sang.

"You and Kurt and your singing." Melody sat up and scooted down a few steps. "Blaine?"

"Yes, pumpkin?" Blaine asked, scooting up a few.

"Can I tell you a secret?" Melody asked, standing and running down the remaining steps until she reached Blaine.

"I'm good at keeping secrets." Blaine said, flashing a big smile.

Melody sat herself on his lap and leaned close. "I don't want to go to the wedding."

"That's not a secret." Blaine whispered back.

"_Blaine_." Melody frowned. "I don't want you to laugh at me."

"Is this the face of someone who goofs off and laughs a lot?" Blaine teased, giving her a squeeze. "Okay. Tell me. No laughter, I promise."

"_You promised_." Melody said, eyeing him. She hung her head. "I don't want to go to the wedding because I can't dance."

"You danced just fine at Rachel and Finn's wedding." Blaine protested.

"Yeah. I stepped on Daddy, Finn, and Kurt's feet and they moved me."

"But it was cute." Blaine said, ruffling her hair. "See? Another reason you have to go. You didn't dance with me before!"

"I don't want to look stupid because I can't dance." Melody frowned. "Kurt can dance and you can and Daddy and Mommy and Finn."

"No, no, no, sweetie. Finn can't dance." Blaine said, expression serious. "Finn cannot dance at _all_."

"He danced with Rachel at the wedding." Melody protested.

"Rachel danced, sweetie. Finn lurked awkwardly."

"I bet I'll… whatever you just said. 'Cause I can't dance."

"Oh, yes you can." Blaine hopped up and carried her into the living room.

"What are you doing?" she asked, eyes widening.

"I'm going to prove to you that you can dance." Blaine said simply, setting her down in the center of the room. "Kurt will just die if he finds out that you don't think you can dance. Because missy, you are dancing with both Kurt and I at _our_ wedding."

"I forgot about that! Life is over!" Melody dramatically dropped to the floor, covering her face. "I'm gonna be like Finn, Blaine!"

"No, no, no, no, no." Blaine reassured her. "Now something very important before we begin."

"What?" Melody asked warily.

"We must stretch first. Dancing is very dangerous business, ma'am." Blaine said, jiggling her arms. "Stretch, stretch, stretch. Hold them up so they're as tall as me!"

Melody giggled and jumped up and down, trying to reach his hands which were raised as well.

"Excellent. You passed phase one with _flying _colors."

"Fabulous flying colors, I hope!" Melody said, going still.

Blaine grinned and went to the CD player, putting on _Everybody (Backstreet's Back)_.

"Blaine!" Melody shrieked. "This isn't a dancing song."

"This is _totally _a dancing song!" Blaine argued, dancing up to her.

"But—But this is the scary video! I'm not allowed to watch it."

"We're just listening." Blaine said, lifting her arms up. "Hold out your claws!"

"Like Lady Gaga?"

"Oh, God. Shh. We don't speak of Lady Gaga in front of Blaine. She's scary." Blaine said¸ beginning to do some very exaggerated dance moves and mouthing the words. "Now I get the werewolf moves, alright? Brian was going to be my husband until I found out he was married."

"You're scaring me." Melody said, watching him dance around the room Backstreet Boys style.

"I can't believe you don't like the Backstreet Boys. I thought all little girls liked the Backstreet Boys."

"Kurt says I can listen to whatever music I want." Melody said stubbornly. "And I don't like them very much."

"Okay, okay, okay." Blaine went over to the CD player and turned on the stereo. He found a slow song and held out his hand. "Miss Melody Elizabeth Hummel, can I have this dance?"

Melody giggled, blushing a bit. "Okay!"

"Okay!" Blaine laughed, taking her hand and moving close to her.

"Are you sure you aren't too tall?" Melody asked, looking hesitant.

"Have I ever told you that you're my favorite person alive?" Blaine grinned. "Okay, okay. We'll start you off easy at first. Hop on my shoes."

"Kurt wouldn't let me do this!" Melody said, stepping onto his feet and tightly gripping hand hands.

Blaine swayed to the music slowly.

"This is fun!" Melody squealed.

"I know!" Blaine laughed. "We're dancing!"

"Blaine, are you and Kurt gonna dance at your wedding?" Melody asked, nuzzling his leg.

"Lots and lots." Blaine said, still moving them around the living room. "Kurt's my favorite dancer."

"Kurt's you're favorite everything." Melody pointed out, giggling.

"I know." Blaine laughed also. "He's my favorite person."

"Mommy says you two are soul mates." Melody said. "Are you?"

"We'd like to think so." Blaine said, twirling her. "That's why we're going to get married."

"Is Kurt going to wear a dress?" Melody giggled.

"I don't think so." Blaine giggled also. "Maybe I will."

"Noooo!" Melody exclaimed.

"Kurt can but I can't? What if I want to?" Blaine teased.

"You're silly." Melody said, tilting her head back to look at him.

"Why thank you." Blaine smiled.

"I'm glad you and Kurt are staying for a few weeks." Melody said, wrapping her arms around his legs and ceasing any dancing.

"Me too, pumpkin. I don't know how many more trips I'll get this long. Soon I'll be _really _working… and then married… And soon after that, there'll be babies."

"Ew." Melody scrunched her nose up. "Isn't Bella enough?"

"Nope. Kurt and I want babies that are all ours, not Finn and Rachel's. Two girls."

"There's too many girls. We need some boys!" Melody chirped.

"I'll see what I can do for you." Blaine winked, before taking her tiny hands and beginning to sway her.

"Blaine, are they going to have chocolate wedding cake?" Melody asked, not even aware that they were dancing.

"God, I hope so. Kurt insists on white or yellow cake at ours." Blaine dramatically sighed.

"This is _horrible_." Melody sighed as well.

"I know!" Blaine laughed. "I told him I was going to tally votes."

"And he told you that you were not." Kurt said, coming into the room. "What's going on here?"

"Melody is teaching me how to dance. I forgot." Blaine shrugged one shoulder. "I need a refresher before David's wedding, you know."

"Ah." Kurt nodded, smiling. "Hopefully you take after the Hummel side when it comes to dancing."

"Hey, we were dancing!" Melody pulled back, giggling and wiping her hands on her sundress. "My hands are sweaty."

Kurt cringed, looking away.

"Thanks, Blaine!" Melody ran off.

"What was that?"

Blaine made a lock and key motion by his lips before throwing away the "key."

"We danced to this song before." Kurt stepped up to Blaine, eyes bright. "On my balcony."

"I might vaguely recall something like that." Blaine smiled.

"Vaguely? Should I remind you?" Kurt questioned. "There was a staircase… The Lima Bean… Cheesecake… Rent tickets… a cab ride… a moonlit walk. A castle…"

"Ah. _That_ night on the balcony." Blaine's smiled grew as Kurt wrapped his arms around his waist, nuzzling his face in the crook of Kurt's neck.

"I love you." Kurt whispered into his curls.

Blaine kissed his neck and mumbled an 'I love you' into Kurt's skin.

"We're supposed to be babysitting."

"_I _am. You're supposed to be doing work stuff." Blaine said and pulled back.

"I think I can afford to take a break and spend some time with you guys." Kurt laced their hands together, walking towards the kitchen. "Really, she asks _you _how to dance? Your version of dancing is the same twisty move, winking, gesturing with your hands, and climbing on furniture."

"It's better than shaking my ass like a mating call." Blaine scoffed.

"I guess it's a good thing you like my ass then." Kurt winked.

"I guess it's a good thing I love your ass then." Blaine corrected, grinning.

"Are you guys talking about Kurt's butt again?" Melody sighed.

"Can't help it." Blaine shook his head, sliding into the seat next to her.

Melody shot them both an annoyed look before covering her ears.


	72. Busted

"Kurt Hummel, were you checking me out when I was going to the bathroom?" Blaine whispered in Kurt's ear from behind.

Kurt jumped and turned, trying his best to maintain an innocent face. "I don't know what you're talking about."

Blaine grinned and slid into the seat booth next to Kurt. "You were _totally_checking me out. I don't know whether to feel violated or turned on."

Kurt blushed a bit, looking away.

"Kurt!" Blaine laughed.

"You should just be glad that after eight years, I still want to check you out." Kurt remarked.

Blaine grinned again and put his hand on Kurt's knee, squeezing it gently. "It's because I'm so damn cute, isn't it?"

"Something like that." Kurt mumbled.

"So were you going to check out my crotch as I walked back up the same way you watched my ass as I left?" Blaine whispered in his ear.

"You wish I would ever be that obvious." Kurt scoffed.

"_You were checking me ouuuuut. You were checking me ouuuuuut_." Blaine sang.

Kurt rolled his eyes and swatted Blaine's hand away from his leg. "Don't get cocky, Blaine. It doesn't suit you well."

"You think everything suits me well. And nothing." Blaine winked.

"Oh my God." Kurt said, glancing around the crowded restaurant quickly to make sure no one had overheard Blaine. "This is why we can't get lunch together."

Blaine grabbed Kurt's hand and laced their fingers together, smiling brightly. "You like this suit on me."

"The metaphorical suit or the physical one?"

"Either or." Blaine shrugged.

"Gray is a good color on you." Kurt said smoothly. "It brings out your eyes. Especially with that tie. You do a good job at dressing yourself. I'll admit I was worried I would have to wake up every morning and dress you for work."

Blaine bumped shoulders with him, rolling his eyes. "You're too much for me sometimes, Kurt."

"At least you only have to deal with me. I have to deal with you, Wes, and David." Kurt teased. He then smiled brightly at Blaine. "And yes. I much prefer the Blaine who holds my hand to the Blaine who teases me and the one who has a one track mind."

"I was _innocently _going to the bathroom and you objectified me by staring at my butt when I was walking. And _I _have a one track mind?" Blaine shook his head in mock disappointment. "How dare you? I would _never _objectify you that way, Kurt."

Kurt laughed loudly. "I've heard the comments Wes makes when I leave a room about us. And you just let him."

"He's just stating facts, Kurt." Blaine said, leaning closer.

"No. I don't want to kiss you. You're mean." Kurt pouted.

"But I want a kiss." Blaine protested, scooting up to him more. "Kiss me, kiss me."

Kurt let out a long sigh and brought his hand up, touching Blaine's cheek.

"Yaaaay!" Blaine smiled adorably.

"Mmmh I love you." Kurt leaned over, pressing their lips together.

"I love you too." Blaine said into the kiss, pulling Kurt even closer. He pulled away several seconds later. "Even if you objectify me."

"Blaine!" Kurt exclaimed. "I'm sorry I checked you out, okay?"

"You should be. You mean, no good, horrible fiancé. You can make it up to me by letting us have a chocolate wedding cake."

"_No_."

"It was worth a try." Blaine shrugged.

"Chocolate wedding cake. What, are we four?" Kurt scoffed as he took a bite of his salad.

"What about marble cake?"

"_No._"

"Red velvet?"

"Try this." Kurt said, holding his fork to Blaine's mouth.

"Mmmh yummy."

"Good. Eat and shut up." Kurt smiled at him adorably. "My lunch will be over soon."

"It's okay. I'll see you at home." Blaine said. "Where I will have chocolate cake samples waiting."e H c

"_Blaine…_"

"Please?"

"No."

"Fine… Violator." Blaine stuck his lower lip out.

"My God. What did I get myself into?" Kurt sighed.

"A fine piece of ass." Blaine quipped. "Last night. Remember?"

Kurt covered his face with one hand after quickly looking around again. "_Blaine_!"

"Yep. Heard that a lot last night too. It was a slightly different tone but all the same."

Kurt raised his other hand to his face as well, trying to disappear.


	73. Digimon Marathon

"Why aren't you dressed for school?" Kurt asked coming into the living room. "You're usually gone by now…"

"'m not going." Blaine responded from the couch.

Kurt rushed over, touching Blaine's cheek. "You don't feel hot. Are you sick, babe?"

Blaine shrugged Kurt's hand away. "I'm skipping."

"Did you hit your head?" Kurt asked a little louder than intended. He couldn't help it. Blaine, skipping? Blaine never skipped.

Blaine laughed. "Just go to school."

"Why are you skipping? There _has _to be a reason."

"Go away." Blaine waved him off.

"Excuse you?" Kurt scoffed. "Who are you and what have you done with my boyfriend?"

Blaine grinned at him and waved. "Mmkay, go byebye now."

"No. I'm seriously starting to worry." Kurt said, putting his hands on either side of Blaine's face and making Blaine look into his eyes. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing is wrong. Don't make me tell you why I'm skipping. You'll judge me." Blaine said, glancing at the clock.

"Are you going somewhere?" Kurt asked, looking confused.

"Er… no?" Blaine asked. "But you should be."

"Oh no? If you're not going anywhere, why do you keep looking at the clock?" Kurt asked, choosing to ignore the later part of Blaine's statement.

"Because W—."

"I'M HERE, BLAINE! Oh, shit. He's not gone yet." Wes yelped, looking as though he'd just been caught shoplifting. "Uh… hey, Kurt…"

Kurt looked back and forth between Blaine and Wes before saying, very slowly, "What is going on?"

"We're having an affair." Blaine blurted.

"Like I would have sex with _you_." Wes laughed loudly. "If I was going to have sex with a guy, he'd have to be at least my height."

Blaine rolled his eyes. "I have to take a Chemistry class next semester. Wes is helping me catch up."

"It's March."

"DIGIMON DIGITAL MONSTERS DIGIMON ARE THE CHAMPI—Kurt's still here._Shit_." David said. "I thought he was going to be gone."

"Isn't that—wait—_you_! You're skipping school for that marathon!" Kurt said, pointing at Blaine. "Why can't you DVR it?"

"_Deleted scenes, Kurt_." David said, making his way completely into the apartment. "Deleted scenes."

"And you three can't watch them after classes?"

"I am just an innocent bystander here." Blaine said from the couch, pulling a blanket off of the back of the couch and onto him. "They are using me for my television."

"You bet we are." Wes said, plopping down on Blaine's legs. "David brought doughnuts!"

"Ow!" Blaine said, smacking Wes' back. "Move! That's my bad leg!"

"I don't wanna!" Wes whined dramatically, wiggling around obnoxiously.

Kurt looked between the three of them, trying his best to look intimidating. "School is very imp—."

"You're in the way of the television. Kindly leave, move, or join us. Those are your only options." David said, sitting on the floor. "It starts in just under two minutes."

"Staaaay." Blaine whined and outstretched his hand.

"I have work to do." Kurt sighed and went over, kissing the top of Blaine's head.

"Aww, okay." Blaine tilted his head up and kissed Kurt on the lips. "You're going to make fun of me when you get home, aren't you?"

"Oh, yes." Kurt nodded, very seriously. "I'm going to make fun of you a lot."

Everyone glanced at Wes, who was quoting along with the show which had just started.

"Okay, Wes, that is _freaky_." David said. "How long has it been since you watched this episode?"

"I think we've got a fanboy on our hands." Blaine giggled as Kurt left the apartment after saying goodbye to everyone.

"He's gone. Can we whip out the t-shirts now?" Wes asked eagerly when a commercial came on.

"Mine is so much cooler than yours." Blaine said eagerly, reaching behind him and pulling three t-shirts otu. "I was seriously scared he was going to make me get up and find them under me, guys."

"It's warm!" Wes cheered. "God, I love when we get to act like we're eight."

"You do that every day, Wes." David commented, pulling his t-shirt on. "How heavily will Kurt judge us, Blaine?"

"Depends on if we're still wearing the t-shirts when he gets back." Blaine giggled.

"But I brought my trading cards too, so…" Wes said.

"Wes, he cannot judge you anymore than he already does." Blaine said very seriously. "The only one here with a reputation to uphold is David."

"It's back on!" David waved his hand frantically. "Quiet guys! Something good is about to happen."

"We have really reached an all new low." Blaine said thoughtfully. "I'm glad we've reached this level of comfort with one another."

"Shut up, Blaine." Wes and David said together.

"Hmph. It's my television."

"_We love you, Blaaaaine…_"


	74. Embarrassing Blaine Stories

"I really shouldn't. I think Blaine may permanently scowl if I tell anymore embarrassing Blaine stories." Alex laughed.

"ANOTHER ONE! ANOTHER ONE!" Melody cheered, banging her fists on the table.

"Melody, you're a traitor!" Blaine hissed.

"I agree." Kurt laughed, leaning over and kissing Blaine's cheek. "I want to hear another one. He's heard tons of stories about me. It's about time we start evening it out."

"How about we talk about something else?" Blaine asked, voice sounding sweet but clearly displeased. "Like monkies?"

"But you sound like the cutest toddler ever." Carole reached over, ruffling his hair. "Just let him tell one or two more?"

"One more?" Alex grinned.

"As long as it's not the Wal-Mart story." Blaine huffed.

"Wal-Mart story?" Kurt asked eagerly.

"_The Wal-Mart story_! We'll tell that one! I had forgotten about that one. This one is _good_." Alex said excitedly.

Blaine groaned.

"This is probably the time I figured out Blaine was going to be super anal when he grew up—cleaning wise, of course." Alex sat up straighter.

"He is very anal when it comes to cleaning." Kurt nodded.

"Alright so when Blaine was like six years old, Mom, Blaine, and I were at Wal-Mart about to get in the checkout lane. Blaine's like 'Mommy, I gotta potty.' So mom says that she'll take him after they're done in the checkout lane. Blaine's like dancing on his toes while we wait in line and he finally just screams, 'I GOTTA POOP! I GOTTA POOP!'"

"Blaine said poop!" Melody giggled.

"Oh God. This didn't happen." Blaine shook his head.

"Mom is all proper and whatever and she looks like she wants to crawl in a hole and die. I'm sitting here cracking up because little etiquette school Blaine has just announced to all of Wal-Mart that he has to poop, and anyone near us is just _staring _as Blaine starts bouncing up and down again, making these utterly ridiculous noises."

Kurt, who had begun to giggle at the same time that Melody did, took several deep breaths to calm himself. Carole was laughing as well, but she at least covered her mouth as she did it.

"Mom's like, 'Okay, Blaine. Shut up and we'll go in a minute' under her breath and Blaine's like 'MOM, I'M GOING TO EXPLODE!'" Alex laughed. "'I HAVE TO POOP!' So then the cashier is staring at Blaine and trying to check out everything quickly and Blaine's now like trying to hop on the cart in some feces induced craze or something, whining 'Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, I'm gonna poop my pants!'"

"Can we stop now? Please?" Blaine asked, blushing.

"We finish checking out and Mom makes me take him into the guys bathroom and I took him into a stall and he just yells, 'I'M NOT POOPING IN HERE! IT'S GROSS AND I NEED PRIVACY!'"

Kurt burst into loud laughter. "I can't even be in the bedroom attached to the bathroom if he has to poop and we've been together for nine years!"

"I hate my life." Blaine moaned.

"So every single guy in the bathroom just bursts out laughing and Blaine just practically waddles out of the bathroom and waits to poop until we get home." Alex finished.

"You're so cute." Kurt said, leaning to kiss Blaine's cheek.

"When he was five, he was infatuated with the penis… which I'm sure isn't a shock either. Should have figured out he was gay then. He would go up to random guys on the street or in the gas station, point at their crotch, and ask if they had a penis in there. And he'd always ask Dad if he was taking his penis to work." Alex snorted loudly.

"When are you flying back to Italy?" Blaine asked.

"_And _when he was younger, if someone didn't fit the stereotypical 'person,' he would point at them and practically scream, 'Daddy, what's that?!'" Alex said.

"Okay, okay, okay!" Blaine whined.

"Nothing tops Wal-Mart, though." Alex grinned. "Aren't you glad you invited me?"

"Not particularly." Blaine huffed, twisting his ring on his finger. "I think it's bed time, Kurt."

"Okay. I'll come up in ten minutes so you can have your privacy." Kurt beamed at him, causing Alex to burst into laughter.

"Just laugh it up, Bambi. Laugh it up." Blaine said, walking out of the room. "And that asshole thinks I want to marry him."


	75. Firsts

**Meeting Burt/Before the first official Date**

"I know Carole's working late tonight so I went ahead and made dinner. Baked chicken—yes, I know you don't like baked chicken, Dad. But you've got to keep eating healthy or you're going to get sick again." Kurt said, rushing around the living room.

"Can't I just have _one _night of eating real food, Kurt?" His father sighed, almost glaring at the baked chicken on the table.

"Don't lie. It tastes amazing. You loved it last time. You're just being stubborn." Kurt spun in a circle, trying to find his jacket that he knew he'd already sat out and—there it was.

"I don't see why you're getting so nervous. You and Blaine always go out and do your… things." Burt said gruffly, arching his eyebrow. "Unless… it's different… Kurt, is this a _date_?"

Kurt heard a car pulling up and then a car door closing. "I've got to go, Dad."

"Kurt, is this a _date_?" Burt repeated.

"It's cold outside and we're going to be late and—yes! Please, just, don't embarrass me. It's a date!" Kurt exclaimed in a hushed voice as there was a knock on the door. "Dad, no."

"I just want to say hello." Burt said gruffly.

"Please, no. Just wait until next time." Kurt pleaded, pulling his jacket on. "He's already scared of you enough as it is."

"If he doesn't have bad intentions, he's got no reason to be scared."

"Oh God, Dad. Really?" Kurt moaned, grabbing his wallet. He opened the door and said, "Hi, Blaine." Sounding rather exasperated.

"Hello, Blaine." Burt added, smirking. "How are you? Come on in. Kurt said it's cold out."

Blaine's hazel eyes widened and he shuffled into the house. Sure, they had one okay talk in the garage… one 'okay' awkward talk in which Blaine asked Burt to give Kurt, his new boyfriend, the sex talk. This wasn't going to be awkward at all. "Hi, Mr. Hummel."

"So, Kurt tells me this is a date?"

"Did I?" Kurt asked. "Because if it gets both of us out of this, I can tell you otherwise."

"Now, boys, this changes things." Burt said. "I want him home by 11:30, Blaine. Kurt, if you're going to be late, you need to call. By _home by 11:30_, I mean inside the house at 11:30. Not making out in either of your over-sized cars. Not that there should be any making out going on because this is just the first date, right?"

Blaine pursed his lips together, nodding.

"Okay, we're going to be late. Is that it?" Kurt asked, voice higher than normal.

"Yes. You can go." Burt said, eyeing Blaine who gulped and resisted the urge to break eye contact. "You boys be smart."

"Oh, God, let's go." Kurt said, practically running to the door. He fumbled to open it and held it open for Blaine, closing it behind him. "_Oh my God_, Blaine. I am so sorry. I tried to just leave but apparently he had to get me back for making him baked chicken instead of fried chicken or—." He trailed off, realizing they were to the car and that Blaine was holding the door open, looking just as nervous as he felt. "Oh. Thanks."

Blaine seemed to inwardly take a deep breath before smiling and saying very softly, "You're welcome."

Kurt got into the car, feeling his cheeks redden. He ducked his head as Blaine walked around to the driver's seat, letting out a deep breath when he thought Blaine wasn't looking.

Blaine got into the car and looked at him, giving him a nervous smile. "Is it going to be this awkward the whole time?"

"I hope not." Kurt said, meeting his eyes and smiling back. He reached over, grabbing Blaine's hand. "I mean, if you think about it… there's no_ real _reason for it to be awkward anyway."

"Oh?" Blaine asked, eyebrow arching.

"Not really. We've already had two extremely passionate kisses—."

Blaine's cheeks reddened this time, and Kurt thought it was beyond adorable.

"And how many times have we gone to a movie and The Lima Bean? It's a long drive but, face it, we've done this tons of times… It can't be _that _much different, right?"

"Right." Blaine said, taking a deep breath and smiling. "But, just so I know, I'm not the only one that's nervous, right?"

"I changed my outfit ten more times than I do on a normal basis." Kurt said. "You are most definitely not the only one that is nervous."eJH

**Blaine has trouble picking a college**

"I thought you were accepted at Duke and Santa Barbara for soccer…" Kurt said slowly. "You were so excited… Why did you even apply to a school in _Kentucky_? Why would you even consider going?"

"My grandmother thought it would be best to apply to some schools closer by in case soccer fell through." Blaine responded, staring down at all of his acceptance letters that were laid out on his bed.

Kurt sat on the edge and peered down at the letters from Duke, UCLA, UC Santa Barbara, OSU, and UK. "Well, soccer didn't fall through."

"I know that." Blaine mumbled into the palm of his hand.

Kurt stood and moved, pushing Blaine's pillows aside and sitting behind him. He squeezed Blaine's shoulder lightly and then rested his head on it. "Where do you want to go, Blaine?"

"I don't know." Blaine moaned, hanging his head.

"Okay, okay…" Kurt said quickly. "Where do you _not _want to go?"

"They're all goo—."

"Which do you _not_ want to go to? What comes to mind first?" Kurt asked.

"Well—."

"Don't think, just answer."

Blaine grabbed the letter to UCLA, tossing it aside and mumbling, "Sorry, Wes."

"Good." Kurt moved across from him, neatly laying out the remaining four letters. "Where else do you not want to go?"

"I hate Ohio." Blaine mumbled, moving his OSU acceptance letter aside as well.

Kurt tried not to feel his chest tighten although, really, he couldn't help it. Sure, he and Blaine had only been dating a little over a month. That didn't change the fact that he loved—could he really say _loved _yet?—the boy. Kurt had always loved Blaine if he thought about it, ever since that first day on the staircase, but this kind of love that it was turning into was stronger, more real, more passionate. Of course Kurt didn't _want _Blaine to leave… But who was he to make him stay?

"Alright." Kurt said, trying to sound cheerful. "We're down to three."

Blaine bit his lip and looked up, into Kurt's eyes. "I don't want to play soccer anymore."

"What?" Kurt asked. "Blaine, you've been scouted by three of the biggest soccer playing colleges in the country. You are as good as soccer as you are singing. I thought you loved soccer."

"I love soccer." Blaine said, straightening the remaining applications on his bed and then looking around his dorm room. "But I don't want to play professionally and I don't want to play at the college level."

"Then why did you… why didn't you say something when these people were scouting? Why did you work so hard at it when they were here?" Kurt asked slowly.

"My family wants me to do it." Blaine admitted.

"Where do you want to go, Blaine?" Kurt asked, putting his hand over Blaine's.

Blaine pushed the three letters together into a neat stack, UK's on top. "The English program at UK is amazing and the campus is really pretty…" Blaine said, voice soft. "And it's closer to y—to family."

Kurt felt like jumping up and down. He didn't do that, though. Instead he smiled and said, "Is that where you want to go?"

Blaine looked down at the letter and then back up at Kurt. "Can I come visit you on weekends?"

"I would be highly offended if you came to see family and didn't." Kurt said, face breaking out into a smile.

Blaine leaned forward suddenly, crashing their lips together with such an intensity that Kurt felt the breath literally leave his body. When Blaine pulled away he took a deep breath, just to fill his lungs, and then gave his older boyfriend an impish smile. "University of Kentucky it is?"

Blaine nodded, giving a bigger smile than Kurt had seen on his face in the several days that Blaine had been debating which college to attend. "University of Kentucky it is."

**Their first "I love you"**

"Mr. Hummel, I know it's Friday and you all have your dinner night but I really have to talk to Kurt." Blaine said, coming into the house as soon as the door was opened.

"I don't think he's in the mood for company, Blaine." Burt said in a firm voice.

"I have to talk to him." Blaine protested.

"He's not coming out of his room. If you can get him out, be my guest." Burt sighed, motioning Blaine in the direction of the stairway leading to the basement.

Blaine went to it, offering Kurt's stepmother a small smile, before knocking on the door.

"Go on down, hon. He probably can't hear." The woman said kindly. "Try and get him to come up and eat something, alright?"

Blaine nodded, pushing the door to the basement open and walking down the stairs.

"I already said I didn't want to eat, Dad." Kurt sighed from the corner where Blaine knew Kurt's actual bedroom was.

"Hey." Blaine said quietly, finally reaching the bottom of the stairs.

Kurt, who was laying in bed and reading Vogue, closed his magazine and sat up.

"You weren't answering your phone."

"Sorry." Kurt said, glancing down at it. "I wasn't paying attention."

"Ah." Blaine made his way over and sat on the edge of the bed, looking at Kurt.

"What?" Kurt sighed a bit. "You're doing it again."

"What am I doing?" Blaine asked, smiling a bit.

"That thing where you look at me and try to figure out what's wrong. It wouldn't be so bad if you weren't usually right in your guesses." Kurt mumbled.

"I'm sure it doesn't have anything to do with the fact that I graduated yesterday." Blaine said, with that small smile still on his face. "Right?"

"It's going to change everything." Kurt finally said. "I feel like I finally found you and you're leaving now."

"It's only a three and a half hour drive." Blaine said, scooting sitting across from him and staring into his eyes.

"What if you meet someone better than me? It's _college_." Kurt said, chewing on his lip.

"There is no one better than you, Kurt." Blaine whispered, not breaking eye contact with him. He reached out, still staring into his eyes, and squeezed Kurt's hand. "Nothing is going to happen to us, Kurt. We're going to be okay."

"How do you know?" Kurt asked, staring back.

"Well…" Blaine hesitated. "Because I love you and because I don't want to be with anyone else."

Kurt's blue eyes widened and he stared at Blaine for several seconds, mouth opening and closing. He then sat up a little straighter, smiling a bit, and said, "I love you too."

Blaine beamed at him goofily, hazel eyes bright and alive. "Really?"

"Really." Kurt repeated, his own smile growing as he nodded and scooted closer. "I love you, Blaine."

"I love you too, Kurt." Blaine repeated, scooting closer.

"I love you too, Blaine." Kurt said again, dropping Blaine's hand gently and touching his face.

"I love you too, Kurt." Blaine also said again, not even caring that it was probably the cheesiest thing in the world. Because it was true. It was very true. Kurt was the first thing he thought about in the morning, the last thing he thought about night, and the younger boy occupied most of his thoughts in-between. He was in love with Kurt and well on his way to being head over heels, he was pretty sure. "This is going to be the most amazing summer of our lives, Kurt."

"Promise?" Kurt asked, kissing him quickly.

"Promise." Blaine responded, kissing him right back.


	76. Gay Marriage Legaliztion

"I don't feel like watching it. It's not going to go through and we're just going to be depressed." Blaine shrugged, not moving from the kitchen table.

"You don't _know_ that." Kurt argued, standing behind him. "It's already legal in five states. It could really happen."

"And when it doesn't what? Another reminder that we can't have the same life that straight couples do?" Blaine questioned. "It's just going to piss me off."

Kurt bent down, kissing the top of his head. "Come watch it with me. You can do your history notes when we watch it. You don't even have to pay attention. I don't want to watch it alone."

Leave it to Kurt to guilt Blaine but secretly he really did kind of want to watch it all unfold. He didn't want to disappointed and he was _so _sure it wouldn't pass, but something made him still want to actually see it. Maybe he was a glutton for punishment. He stood up and grabbed his school stuff, taking it with him as he followed Kurt back into their living room.

The television was already on the news channel, but muted because it was clear they weren't about to make the announcement in the next little bit.

Blaine attempted to pay attention to his homework while they waited, but it was too quiet when the TV was muted and he was too distracted when the sound was working. Not to mention the fact that Oreo and Kreacher kept playing tag at their feet, Kreacher most definitely _not _being quiet about it.

As it drew closer to time, the news quit cutting out to discuss other stories. Instead, it stayed focused on the senate room where several men in suits sat. Kurt began to anxiously tap his foot and _tried _to bite his nails but Blaine quickly put a stopper in that when he gently elbowed Kurt and said, "Stop it. That's gross and if you start biting your nails again you'll blame me."

"What if it doesn't happen?" Kurt asked, looking at him with bright blue eyes.

"Then we go with plan A. As long as we finish eating any fruits before we cross the border, the Canadians will be nice." Blaine joked, but there was no laughter in his tone of voice. Truth be told, he didn't feel much like joking. The only thing he felt was sick to his stomach.

Kurt's phone buzzed and he pulled it off of the table, glancing at it. "Mercedes is watching too. She says it's very tense in New York right now."

Blaine looked down at his own phone, which had been on silent, and saw that he had texts from David and Wes.

_Are you watching it?_

This is taking for-fucking-ever. Would you be offended if I put it back on Pokemon?

Whoops, already did. Too late to answer!

Okay, I changed it back. Enough with the silent treatment, Blainers.

WHY DON'T YOU LOVE ME?

Blaine let out a loud laugh, typing out a text back to Wes.

**I don't care if you watch it, Wes. My phone was on silent.**

**And I love you too.**

Liar.

Blaine rolled his eyes and answered David next, just a simple **Yeah**_._

"It's taking them forever." Kurt moaned, looking up from his phone. "Rachel's texting me now too."

"I'm too nervous to text." Blaine said, setting his phone on the coffee table and finally shutting his book that he hadn't been able to read anyway. He watched Kurt put his own phone next to Blaine's and then felt Kurt's soft fingers lacing with his own.

Kurt scooted closer, resting his head on his shoulder. "It would change everything, wouldn't it?"

"Yeah." Blaine's voice was soft. "Yeah, it would."

"It has to happen. It _has_ to." Kurt bit his lip, squeezing Blaine's hand tightly.

Finally, the standing senator's face showed on the screen and then a voice came but both of the boys were so anxious they couldn't tell if it was the senator talking or a newscaster.

"Gay marriage is—."

Kurt sat up straight, hand now squeezing Blaine's so tightly that it was almost painful for both of them. Blaine just squeezed back, though, and stared straight ahead. This was a big moment. Their dreams coming true depended on this. That very moment. Kurt was right. It would change their lives.

"Now legal in the state of New York." The man finished, before the camera zoomed in on several people in a crowd shouting "USA! USA!"

"Making it the sixth state in the United States to legalize the marriage of same sex couples."

Blaine dropped Kurt's hand, both of his hands covering his mouth as he stared at the television screen in complete shock. His phone was lighting up, Wes was calling him, David was texting him, but he couldn't seem to move. Kurt's phone started to ring as well but Kurt stared at the television, the same shocked expression on his face and tears in his eyes.

"I—Wh—." Blaine swallowed, trying to find words but unable to make them come.

Kurt reached down, picking up his phone but not answering the call. It was Rachel, of course. As if he was surprised, but it didn't matter who called. All that mattered was that _everything _was now possible. They could have _everything_.

"Kurt—did that really—." Blaine sputtered, grabbing the remote control and rewinding until the senator's face showed again.

"Gay marriage is now legal in the state of New York."

Blaine rewound again, not able to believe it.

"Gay marriage is now legal in the state of New York."

Surely he was hearing things, right?

"Gay marriage is now legal in the state of New York."

Oh.

Kurt threw his arms around Blaine's neck, kissing the top of his head several times and letting out a shaky breath.

"We can get married." Blaine breathed. "Kurt, we can get married in New York. We can move upstate like we wanted, have jobs in the city, and get married and have kids and be a real family."

"I know. I know." Kurt murmured into Blaine's hair. "We can get married!"

Blaine pulled back, a positively adorable grin spreading across his face. "We _will _get married."

Kurt laughed, still teary eyed. "I hoped but I didn't—didn't think it would _happen_. Not this soon. Not in a state so big."

"I know. I know." Blaine agreed. "It's… just… Wow."

Kurt wiped his eyes, smiling brightly and then scooting closer to Blaine. Blaine slid an arm around his think waist and grabbed the remote with his free hand.

"Are you going to watch it again?"

"Maybe the more I see it, the more I'll start to believe it. This is just too good to be true."

"Well it is true." Kurt sat up a little straighter and kissed Blaine. "And one day, I'm going to marry you."

"Legally." Blaine grinned, kissing him back.

"Legally."


	77. Girl's Night

"No."

"But Blaine—."

"No. You. No." Blaine shook his head.

"Don't go." Kurt wrapped his arms around Blaine's waist and nuzzled him. "Please?"

"You cannot expect me to stay at home when Rachel Berry is staying over." Blaine said in a hushed voice, glancing in the direction of the kitchen.

"Mercedes will be here." Kurt rolled his eyes. "It won't just be Rachel. Besides, you need to start getting used to her."

"I love Mercedes but even she cannot make an entire night confined to a room with Rachel enjoyable." Blaine said. "I'm sorry."

"The porn."

"What?" Blaine sputtered.

"You were watching porn and I didn't say anything." Kurt said slowly.

"No, no, no. This is what you pulled on Finn back in high school to get us into that party!" Blaine said, pointing an accusatory finger at Kurt. "Absolutely not."

"Porn is _disgusting_."

"Says you. You're barely home and sometimes my imagination isn't enough to get the job done." Blaine huffed. "You spoiled me."

"Come on, Blaine." Kurt urged. "It's just one night. Less than 24 hours…" he paused, bit his lip, and looked at Blaine trying to make his eyes as innocent as possible. "For me?"

"Oh-ho-ho _no_." Blaine shook his head. "No sir. No. No, nada, zip, _no_."

"I'll make potato candy."

Blaine bit the inside of his cheek, trying to think of _anything_ he could possibly say at that point. Or maybe just to keep his mouth from opening and shouting, "YES OKAY!" Because no. David and Wes would _never _let him live it down. And they would find out. They had a sixth sense—one called Blaine-Is-Doing-Something-Potentially-Embarrassing .

"Two batches." Kurt continued. "It's a whole _four months early_, Blaine. Potato candy."

"But—." Blaine said weakly. "But that's _mean_."

"I want to spend time with you. You've worked all week." Kurt stuck out his lower lip. "Don't make me beg."

"I think you're past the point of begging." Blaine scowled. _Fight it, Blaine. You are a man. An independent man that can make his own decisions. Fight it._

"I'll make two batches of potato candy, quit making comments about the porn, _and _buy you more credit for your Nook."

_He's bringing books into it. My other love. Sick, cruel, twisted man._

"Fifty dollars worth of credit."

_Fifty dollars of credit_… _For your nook._

"_Fine_! But I want that candy tonight or it's a no go!" Blaine exclaimed. "And I am _not _watching Wicked, listening to Lady Gaga, or painting anyone's nails. You get _one warning _when it comes to anything about Finn or David that makes me uncomfortable. The thought of Finn and Rachel having sex makes me want to throw up in my mouth, okay? And I do _not _need to know more details about David's sex life than I already know—especially not from a girl's point of view."

"Fine."

"And if I hear Aunt Flow, menstrual cycle, period, time of the month, Mother Nature's Revenge, Tom, The Red Carpet, Punctuation, or riding the cotton pony, I am _out_." Blaine continued in a firm voice. "I'm telling you, if a period comes up _once_ I am taking my candy and I am _leaving_."

"Alright."

"And don't you _dare _let Rachel try to cuddle up to me again."

"It was only once, Blaine."

"Hmph. I'm going to go for a very manly run." Blaine said before turning and walking out of the apartment.

…

"You are _so _whipped. It's not even funny." David sighed, shaking his head as Blaine sank onto his and Wes' couch between them.

"It's almost kind of sad." Wes laughed. "Did you paint your toenails, Blainers?"

Blaine shot Wes a warning look.

"Try to be menacing all you want but you're shorter and I'm pretty sure you've got glitter in your hair." Wes grinned.

"Fuck my life. I took, like, four showers before I left. Rachel and Mercedes decided it would be 'cute' to pretend they were four and make pictures with glue and glitter." Blaine scowled. "Just so we know, Miss Berry made a castle. I'm pretty sure half of the glitter contents, however, ended up in my hair. Long story. Please don't ask."

"Did Kurt make one?" David snickered, making a mental note to ask Kurt what had happened with the glitter castle.

"No. Kurt was too busy washing flour out of his hair because the girls decided it would be fun to make cookies and get flour all over my kitchen." Blaine huffed. "That I spent three hours cleaning two days ago, might I add."

"He sounds less like a man and he only lasted five hours with them." Wes burst into laughter.

"Where's that potato candy you promised us?" David asked.

"Kurt's withholding it because _I didn't hold up my end of the deal_." Blaine scoffed.

"_Blaine had to go to Girl's Night_!" Wes suddenly said, hitting his knees with his hands. "This is _fantastic_. I have _got _to thank Kurt for this. I need photographic proof. Oh God, why didn't we put those cameras up like I said?"

"Because that is awkward and illegal?" David rolled his eyes.

"You wanted to put _cameras _in my house?"

"You and Kurt living together? I _have _to see how that works." Wes shrugged. "Besides, I want to see if that dog is as bad as you make him out to be."

"Girl's night." David giggled, shaking his head. "We'll buy you a glitter tiara tomorrow if you want, Blaine. You could have just told us our activities were too manly for you."

"It's purple glitter." Wes giggled, reaching over and touching one of Blaine's damp curls. "Look. And pink too!"

"There's light blue in there too somewhere." Blaine sighed. "Can we watch football or something? Monster trucks? Boxing? A murder mystery show?"

"I thought we could watch My Little Pony on Pay Per View since it'll match your hair." David said, clapping his hands together as Wes rolled onto his side laughing hysterically.

"Stop it, guys." Blaine whined.

"It's okay, Belle. We can get you a leotard to go with your tiara tomorrow too." David reached over and patted his head.

"I will hit you if you call me Belle one more time." Blaine threatened, holding his hand up. "I will hit you, David."

"He's a runner." Wes sang. "If you try to run, he'll probably catch you."

"With those short legs?" David smirked, patting Blaine's head once again. "Not a chance."


	78. I want to have babies with you one day

"Blaine?" Kurt sat up in bed quickly, rubbing his face. "Melody?"

He rubbed sleep out of his eyes and then looked down. Melody's play pin was empty, as was Blaine's side of the bed. He knew they'd been there when he went to sleep, though. It had taken them an hour to get Melody to sleep even with the aid of her swing. Her slight fever wasn't helping matters at all, Kurt was sure.

Kurt slid out of bed and made his way out into the hall, opening his mouth to call out Blaine's name again but stopping when he heard Blaine speaking from the living room. He peeked into the living room, breath catching somewhere between his lungs and his throat.

"I think Kurt and I are cursed every time you sleep over with us, don't you?" Blaine was whispering, walking up and down the length of their small living room and rubbing little Melody's back. "Huh? Do you?"

Melody whimpered, nuzzling his chest and looking absolutely pitiful.

"Shh, shh. Don't start to cry. We don't want to wake Kurt up. He was up really late last night doing homework." Blaine said, still rubbing her back. "Good girl. You're okay. We've got this, pumpkin."

Melody just whined again and sniffled, looking up with watery eyes.

"Hey there, pretty girl." Blaine cooed. "See? Blaine can make it better too. I get it though. I like Kurt to hug me when I'm sick or sad too. He's really good at that, hmm?"

Kurt bit back a smile, head tilted to the side as he watched Blaine. The more and more Kurt saw Blaine with Melody, the more and more he knew that Kurt wanted_this _later on. He wanted to have a baby girl with Blaine. A baby girl that Blaine could talk to just like this, because Blaine was amazing during most circumstances but there was just _something _about Blaine with a baby that gave Kurt the goosebumps. The good kind. The best kind.

Melody began to fuss again.

"Shh, shh, shh, my love. It's okay." Blaine whispered. "You're just fine, sweetie. Just fine."

Kurt smiled as Melody relaxed against Blaine again, whines softening. Blaine was going to be the perfect father. There was no doubt about it, even though Blaine had made comments once or twice about how he probably _wouldn't _be due to the fact that he'd had a bad relationship with his own dad. That was bull, in Kurt's opinion. Anyone that saw Blaine with Melody or even with Wes' younger sister would know that Blaine was going to be an amazing dad.

"Oh my God!" Blaine gasped as he turned the corner. "You scared the shi—tzu out of me."

"I was looking for you. And I found you." Kurt said rather lamely, staring at him.

"She was getting fussy. I hope she didn't wake y ou." Blaine whispered, nodding down at Melody who turned her head to look at Kurt. " Look who's awake, Mellie. "

"Hey, sweetie." Kurt said, touching Melody's warm cheek. "Her fever went down a bit."

"I think she wanted you." Blaine said, moving to hold her out.

"I think she's perfectly fine with you." Kurt said, squeezing Blaine's arm gently. "You know, Kurt's not the _only _one good at taking care of people who are sick. I seem to remember a time or two that you took care of me too."

"That was different." Blaine said, almost bashfully.

"Not so much." Kurt patted Blaine's back and nudged him towards their bedroom. "Is she asleep now?"

"I think so." Blaine said, carefully easing Melody back into her play pin.

Kurt lay down, pulling the blankets back for Blaine as he crawled into bed as well. "Blaine?"

"Yeah, Kurt?" Blaine yawned, lying down.

Kurt leaned over Blaine, looking down at him. "I want to have babies with you one day."

"Mmmh. Two girls. I know." Blaine smiled sleepily. "G'night, Kurt. I love you."

Kurt bent and kissed Blaine's cheek "Good night. I love you too."


	79. Kurt's Mailman Incident

"No wanna take the medicine."

"We'll you've got to, kiddo. If your mom comes home from Grandma's this weekend and you're sick, she'll kill me."

Three year old Kurt's eyes widened in horror.

"Not really!" Burt said quickly.

Kurt's lip began to tremble.

"This is why your mother is the better one to deal with you being sick." Burt sighed and held out the cup of cough syrup again. "C'mon, Kurt. We'll take this medicine and then watch some television."

Kurt glared, sticking his thumb in his mouth.

"No sucking your thumb." Burt pulled Kurt's tiny hand down from his mouth gently. "Mommy will kill me if you start that up again while she's gone too."

"No wanna take the medicine." Kurt said very slowly and clearly.

"And I didn't want to have to take off of work but sometimes we have to do stuff we don't want to. It's called being a big boy." Burt said, also very slowly and clearly. "Take the medicine."

"No!" Kurt climbed off of the couch and stamped his little foot.

"Kurt Elijah Hummel…" Burt said, pointing to the couch. "You are sick. Lie down and take your medicine."

"I'm a baby!" Kurt protested. "No medicine!"

"Yes medicine." Burt sighed and picked him up.

"NO NO NO NO NO!" Kurt wailed, flailing his arms and legs. "WANT MOMMY! WANT MOMMY!"

"Mommy is out of the state right now." Burt said. "Calm down, Kurt."

"NOOOOOO!" Kurt wailed, tears streaming down his face.

"You're going to make yourself sicker." Burt said, setting Kurt against the back of the seat and covering him with his pale green blanket.

"I-I-I'm a b-b-baaaby!" Kurt cried.

"Alright, alright. You're a baby." Burt agreed. "But babies still have to take medicine when they're sick."

Kurt sniffled and rubbed his eye with his little fist. "No wanna."

"I'll give you ice cream after."

"No wanna." Kurt shook his head.

"Cheesecake? There's still one piece left."

"That's Daddy's piece." Kurt's blue eyes widened.

"Daddy is letting you have it."

Kurt's eyes lit up.

"But only if you take your medicine so you can feel better."

Kurt crawled to the edge of the couch, picked the little cup of medicine up off of the end table, and gulped the cough syrup down. "Cheesecake!"

"Good job!" Burt said, looking proud of himself. "I'll be right back."

…

"I don't know what's going on, Elizabeth! I gave him the cough syrup and cheesecake and he's literally bouncing off of the walls!" Burt rambled into his phone. "I've never seen him like this before."

"He's probably having an allergic reaction to the medicine and the cheesecake is making it worse." Elizabeth said calmly. "Try to get him to sit down."

"Kurt, come he—he's acting like a dog again, Liz. Why is he acting like a dog again?" Burt asked.

His wife burst into laughter.

"Kurt, no… Kurt… it's just the mailman… Kurt… Kurt! What are you doing? Get inside!" Burt sighed heavily. "I've got to go."

"Bye, I love you!"

"Love you too." Burt rushed outside in time to see Kurt growl at the mailman and latch onto his leg… with his teeth.

"OW!" The mailman yelped, looking down.

"Oh my God. I am so sorry." Burt ran over, scooping Kurt up.

"Is he one of those feral children?" The man snapped, glaring.

"No. He's just medicated." Burt snapped right back, grabbing the mail from him. He turned and walked towards their house. "Growl louder, Kurt. I don't think he can hear you."

"GRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!"


	80. Kurt's Nightmares

"Kurt? Are you out here?" Blaine yawned as he made his way into the kitchen.

"Mhmm." Kurt said from the table, staring down into a half full glass of milk. "Did I wake you?"

"No. I got cold without my Kurt blanket." Blaine padded over, bending down and kissing the top of his head. "What's wrong? Are you okay?"

"I… had a nightmare." Kurt sighed, not looking up from his milk.

Blaine sat into the seat nearest to him and scooted as close as he could, taking one of his hands in his own.

"I thought this was over." Kurt said miserably. "I haven't had a nightmare about the attack in nearly two years."

"Why don't we go get into bed?" Blaine asked, squeezing his hand. "We'll be more comfortable."

Kurt took a deep breath and nodded, standing. Blaine followed him into the room, carefully crawling onto the bed so as to not squish Kreacher who was (as always) sleeping on the foot of the bed—Blaine's side, of course.

Kurt got into bed too but sat up straight, not even getting under the covers.

"Come on." Blaine opened his arms.

Kurt slid into a laying position and rested his head on Blaine's chest, closing his eyes tightly. "It was just like they used to be. I could _feel _it. I could feel my head hitting the wall and my side still hurts."

Blaine closed his own eyes, gripping Kurt all that much tighter. "I'm… I'm sorry, Kurt."

"I hate thinking about it." Kurt whispered, balling some of Blaine's shirt in his fist. "I really hate it, Blaine."

"I know. I know." Blaine said, moving one hand up and down his back.

"It just… I… I've done so good at blocking it out and not thinking about it, but… it was like it was ha… happening…" Kurt took in another deep breath and very slowly let it out.

"It was just a nightmare." Blaine whispered, bringing his hand up to stroke Kurt's messy hair. "You're home and everything is okay."

"Why was it me?" Kurt mumbled.

"I wish it had been me." Blaine sighed, moving his hand down to rub his back soothingly.

"No." Kurt sat up and shook his head. "Don't say that."

"I hated seeing you go through that. I hate seeing you like this right now." Blaine reached up and touched Kurt's face. "I wish I had been able to protect you."

Kurt moved back into a laying position, snuggling up to Blaine and resting his head on his boyfriend's shoulder. "I love you, Blaine."

"I love you too, Kurt." Blaine said, rubbing his arm. "I'm right here… Get some rest, you've got your big critique tomorrow. I'm right here and you're okay."

Kurt closed his eyes, feeling safe and warm with his boyfriend. Blaine was right. He was okay. He had Blaine.


	81. Kurt and Wes Get Drunk

"Bl-Bl-Blainers? 'Eeeey, Blaine! 'Eeeeey!"

Blaine held his cell phone out, wincing. "Wes, are you drunk?"

"Now—Now…. Now don't get mad."

Blaine sat up, forcing his eyes open. He didn't even remember falling asleep, but he must have because he was in his pajamas and on his and Kurt's couch. "Why would I get mad? Where are you? Are you with David?"

"I'm with—here—."

Blaine arched his eyebrow as he heard rustling and then a, "Blaine, you've got to come get me." This was followed by a hiccough and then a, "I think I am drunk."

"_Kurt_?!"

"They were just yummy and you're totally right. Wes is super persuasive and the room is spinning. Should I call my Dad? Oh my God. I've never been this drunk before. I should call my Dad."

"No, no, no. Don't call Burt." Blaine was already out the door, keys in hand. "Give the phone to Wes, Kurt."

"This shirt is _Alexander McQueen_ and if you touch it, I will _kill _you!" He heard Kurt say moments later. He didn't know who Kurt was talking to, but the fact that he still knew what shirt he was wearing gave Blaine at least a little comfort. A little, but not too much considering his boyfriend was drinking with Wes. Who knew if most of the alcohol had hit Kurt yet?

"Wesley, what are you _thinking_?" Blaine hissed. "You got _drunk _with my fiancé?"

Wes giggled loudly. "You know I can't contain… contain myself around… around alcohol. God, am I making sense? Kurt's so awesome, Blaine. Kudos to you because man he's so _funny_. He is, like, hilarious."

"You _watch him_!" Blaine snapped. "Do you hear me, Wesley? I am on my way. Do not let him out of your sight, okay? Do not let him out of your sight."

"Fine, fine, fine. Keep your boxers on." Wes drunkenly scoffed before hanging up.

He had a feeling it was going to be a long night.

…

"BLAINE!"

"Oh my God, Kurt." Blaine gasped, rushing over to help a very drunk Kurt out of the booth.

"Oh! Hi, Blaine!" Kurt chirped. He pointed towards the table. "This is_amazing_. It's got strawberry and—and I _love _strawberry!"

Blaine looked at the mostly empty glass Kurt was pointing to… and then the three empty glasses next to it. When he looked up, there was a cup in his face.

"Drink it. It's yummy!" Kurt insisted, nudging the glass against his mouth.

"I'm sure it is." Blaine said gently, taking Kurt's elbow and nudging him a bit. He then said none too kindly, "Wes, get up."

"Rude pants." Wes huffed. "You're jus' jealous Ku-Kurt's drunk a-and c-can keep somewhat co-com-compos—screw it."

Kurt, who 'had composure' fell out of the booth. "Woah!"

Blaine caught him before he fell face first onto the dirty bar floor and heaved him up. "C'mon, my love."

It was beginning to hit him. He'd never actually _seen _Kurt drunk. He'd heard stories of the two or three times Kurt had been drunk in his life, but he'd never _seen _it. He had no idea what to expect. Was Kurt a mopey drunk? A happy drunk? He remembered Kurt being grumpy when he'd been _tipsy_ and hoped that wasn't what his night was going to be like.

Kurt nuzzled Blaine's shoulder affectionately and tangled a hand in his hair. "Mmmh, Blaine, I love you. You smell niiiiiiice."an indication of

"Shh, shh, shh." Blaine said, wrapping an arm around Kurt's waist. "Wes, are you coming or do I have to come back in for you?"

Wes sat Indian style on the floor, giving Blaine a 'try to make me move' look.

"Don't make me call David. Or your girlf—."

"Like that _woman _has control over _me_." Wes scoffed as he stood. "She thinks she does."

"Yes well there are several things I could say to that statement but I'm too good of a friend to bring it up while you're drunk. Now come on or I'm calling one of the two of them." Blaine said, trying his hardest to sound stern. He was completely out of his element, though. This was David's job.

"Your arms are so nice." Kurt said thoughtfully, putting his hand on Blaine's arm. "Thank God for your sexy body because I could just eat you up and I do mean that—." Kurt hiccupped before finishing. "Literally."

"You want to eat me, Kurt?" Blaine teased as he helped Kurt outside, keeping an eye on Wes as they went.

"Here and there and everywhere said the cow." Kurt said, nodding very seriously.

"That's a very bossy cow." Wes said.

Kurt turned in Blaine's arms to face Wes. "I know! They're so mean!"

"It's why we tip them!" Wes exclaimed. "And then we get chocolate milk."

"I don't think it works that way. I think that's a milkshake—-HAHAHAHAHAH Blaine, did you—did you hear that?" Kurt said, throwing his head back and began laughing even louder.

Blaine rolled his eyes but couldn't keep himself from smiling as he helped his boyfriend into the backseat of his car. Kurt really was adorable.

"I'm s-so funny. I-I'm hilarious." Kurt said, waving energetically when Wes climbed into the back seat with him.

"You're so _awesome _to drink with, Kurtsie. Fun_tastic_." Wes said, expression very serious. "Like better than Blaine because…. Oooh, that was a tilty spinny lurchy thing."

"Hey, hey, hey. I have a question because I'm drunk and won't remember in the morning. Are you gay? Do you love Blaine?"

Wes threw his head into his lap, banging his fists on the seat as he laughed loudly and hysterically.

"You kissed him. More than once. And you're very concerned with our dicks and—." Kurt burped and covered his mouth, blue eyes huge. He then giggled and lowered his hand. "And asses."

"Don't worry." Wes sat up, breathing hard. He put a hand on Kurt's shoulder and gave him a meaningful look, which Blaine watched through the rear view mirror. "Blaine's the only guy I'll ever kiss."

Kurt blinked several times, looking confused. He then said, slowly, "Is that supposed to make me feel better?"

"Yeah! Yeah, it totally is!" Wes nodded.

Kurt shrugged and sat up straight. "Blaine, I would like some cheesecake… _Please_."

"DRUNK FOOD RUN!" Wes cried. "PULL THE CAR OVER! THERE IS A DENNY'S!"

"I'm not taking you two into a restaurant like this." Blaine said.

"_Blaaaaine_!" Kurt whined. "I'm really hungry and thirsty."

"We have plenty of food at home." Blaine said.

"I don't have food at my home." Wes said. "Hey! Let's just get out at the next stop light! We can walk there!"

"I'm not _that _drunk." Kurt said, burping a bit and then giggling. "Maybe I am."

"No, dude, you totally are." Wes said. "Blaine! Turn!"

"No." Blaine sighed.

He saw Kurt whisper something to Wes, who nodded eagerly. Kurt then spoke, clearly trying his hardest to sound sober and calm. "I would like… to have… some food. Please."

"Kurt, it's late. I'll make you two something at—." Blaine trailed off, seeing Kurt's pout in the rearview mirror.

"I'm hungry, Blaine. _Hungry_." Kurt pouted.

"You're a cute drunk." Blaine moaned, pulling into a Denny's parking lot.

"Yay!" Kurt and Wes cheered together, clapping their hands.

…

"Alright. Wes is asleep on the couch. Now it's time to get you all cleaned up and ready for bed." Blaine said nearly two hours later, coming into the bedroom. "Do you want to take a shower?"

"Take a bath with me." Kurt whined, blinking at Blaine innocently.

"Okay…" Blaine said slowly.

Kurt scrambled to the bathroom they shared together in their small New York apartment, practically bouncing in place as he waited for Blaine. "Get your clothes off."

"Well this is quite the role reversal." Blaine commented, unbuttoning his shirt. "Good luck with _yours_, Mr. Hummel."

"Shut up. I look _fabulous_." Kurt scoffed, struggling to undo some of his buttons. He then let out a loud whine and tugged the sweater over his head.

"That was all you. I cannot be held accountable for that in the morning." Blaine pointed to the vest that Kurt had thrown onto the back of the toilet.

"Want it in writing?" Kurt giggled, going over and undoing Blaine's belt. He then slid his hands down Blaine's back and rested them on his ass. "I've never had sex drunk."

"Oh my God." Blaine said, hazel eyes widening. "Kurt, let's just take a shower."

"Take a shower or 'take a shower'?" Kurt gave him an impish smile.

"Remember all of those times that I wanted to have sex drunk and you didn't think it would be appropriate?" Blaine asked him.

"I'm sure you're making this up." Kurt kissed Blaine's neck.

"Mmmh, I'm not." Blaine said, eyes fluttering closed. "So we can't have sex. I'm returning the favor."

"I think we can have sex." Kurt mumbled into his skin, hand sliding into his pants.

"Oh my _God_. You've got to stop now before I can't make you." Blaine said, biting his lip an attempt to keep a moan from slipping out.

Kurt's impish smile turned into an outright smirk, blue eyes darker than normal as he ran his fingers down Blaine's length.

"You make it really hard to do the right thing." Blaine grunted, willing his hand to pull Kurt's hand out of his boxers but finding it nearly impossible to do so.

"If it's not right, I want to be wrong." Kurt bit his ear.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck." Blaine grunted again, thrust his hips upward against Kurt's hand.

"Hey, guys, I really have to pe—." Wes trailed off, jaw dropping.

"Oh my God!" Kurt shrieked, yanking his hands out of Blaine's jeans and stumbling out of the room.

"WES, I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!" Blaine exclaimed.

"EEP!" Wes ran from the room¸ knocking over end tables as he went in order to deter Blaine.

"Why—Why—Why—Why—Why?" Blaine asked, banging his head on the door.

In the back of his mind, he knew this was payback for all of the times that he had cockblocked Wes when they were at Harvard. But _still_. _Still_. Life just wasn't fair.


	82. Melody's Crush

_Background info:_

_-Before Kurt and Blaine have kids and shortly after they're married, Blaine ends up in a situation where he has to take in a neglected ten year old boy whose parents are being sent to jail while a trial is taking place. When they first get him, he's not very nice to Kurt and Blaine because "they're faggots." But eight year old Melody is having none of it and sets him straight when she meets him. The boy, Ryan, ends up growing closer to Kurt and Blaine and stays with them until he is adopted into a nice home a few months later. When leaving, Ryan is on friendly terms with Melody. I figure that may be important for this drabble. And this back story, but not necessarily the drabble itself, will make it into the sequel._

…

"Hey, now. You came to spend the weekend with us, not with our couch and Lifetime." Blaine said, plopping on the couch next to Melody and shaking her foot.

"Yeah. You've had your eyes glued to the screen ever since we put the kids down to bed. What's up?" Kurt added, sitting on Blaine's lap.

"It's nothing." Melody shrugged, passing the remote control over.

"Boy trouble." Kurt and Blaine said together.

"I am _not _getting into this with you too. It'll be two hours before dad hears about it." Melody said, sounding eerily like Kurt.

"I am shocked and offended!" Kurt gasped, looking wounded.

"It's about Ryan."

"You still talk to him?" Blaine asked, looking shocked. "You were eight when he was staying with us!"

"We exchanged phone numbers and we've kind of talked off and on since he was adopted." Melody shrugged. "Only now he lives in Cincinnati instead of southern New York. And I've seen him a few times. And…"

"_You like him_! Oh my God, Melody, this is like a storybook!" Kurt cooed. "Oh my God, oh my God. You're going to get married and have babies and oh my God."

"Calm down, Kurt." Blaine laughed, giving him an affectionate squeeze. "I thought we agreed you were going to stick with your first calling from here on out, remember?"

Kurt frowned a bit momentarily before perking up. "This is _amazing_. How cute is he on a scale of one to ten?"

"Twelve." Melody whined dramatically, covering her face with one of the couch pillows.

"Hey now, wait! I haven't heard from him in over a year. That's not fair. How is he?"

"He's perfect. That's how he is." Melody let out a tiny sigh and then scowled. "Stupid boys."

"Isn't he two years older than you?" Blaine asked, sitting up a little straighter.

"Yes, _father_, he is." Melody shot Blaine a look. "I thought you all and Finn were the 'cool brothers.'"

"We're very cool. And we want details. Juicy ones." Kurt said eagerly. "You don't understand married life anymore, Melody. There's no juice left."

"There is orange and apple juice left!"

"I'm not talking about the kind of juice in Sophie's sippy cups." Kurt said. "I'm talking about teenage _love_." He then looked at Melody. "Now its just routine. You take 'em, I'll pick 'em up¸ and if they're lucky we'll feed them at some point."

"He's grossly exaggerating." Blaine said, kissing Kurt's cheek from behind. "We feed them daily. And there is plenty of juicy stuff."

"I'll give you details if you two quit being so lovey dovey." Melody said, tucking her feet underneath her and sitting up straight. "He's got dark hair and the brightest eyes I've ever seen in my _life_."

Kurt let out a dreamy sigh, head tilted. "And?"

"And he's got these _arms_."

"Hey, you're too young to be looking at arms!" Blaine said. "You're fourteen!"

"But he has _sixteen _year old arms." Melody pointed out.

"Sixteen year old arms are nice." Kurt nodded his understanding.

"And whose arms were you looking at when you were—OW!" Blaine grunted, massaging his side. "I wish you'd get fat so your elbow wouldn't be so_pointy_!"

"You left off on the arms." Kurt prompted eagerly, ignoring his husband's scoffing.

"_He likes me_!" Melody finally said.

"_Married and babies! I told you!_" Kurt exclaimed, clapping his hands together.

"No. He lives in Cincinnati. I live in Lima. And Dad has a flame thrower." Melody said shortly.

"He really does." Blaine said. "I saw it once."

"Does he really have one?" Kurt asked, eyes widening in surprise.

"Yep. Finn showed me where it's at." Blaine nodded. "Maybe you should get Finn to dispose of it, Mel. Because Burt will have a fit if he knows."

"He really will." Kurt nodded. "So will Mom."

"No. Mom's thrilled. I think she's already planning a wedding." Melody sighed.

"So what's the problem?" Kurt asked.

"The problem is that I'm fourteen, he's sixteen, and we currently live almost two hours away. Oh, and Dad. Dad's the big problem. I don't know what to do!"

Kurt reached over, stroking her hair. "What do you feel like you should do?"

"I just want to kiss him!" Melody breathed. "His hugs are the best Kurt."

Kurt glanced at Blaine, giving him a knowing sort of smile because he could remember feeling the same way about Blaine's hugs when he was seventeen and they were in the beginning stages of their relationship. Who was he kidding? Blaine still gave the best hugs.

"Then kiss him." Blaine said simply. "Burt remembers Ryan. He knows that he was harmless. It was a little… rough at first but he was young and he came around. If he had any problems, it was just that he'd had really bad parenting."

"Somehow I don't think Dad's going to be thinking that." Kurt sighed. "Of course he's not going to base anything off of how he acted when he was ten. He's just going to see the fact that he's two years older. He wasn't even thrilled with me dating you and technically you're not even a full year older. Have you talked to Mom about it?"

"She's acting like she doesn't care what Dad thinks. I think she just wants to have another child to take care of." Melody grumbled.

"She does like taking in strays." Kurt said, turning on Blaine's lap and kissing his cheek.

"You're so mean to me." Blaine said, leaning forward and kissing him.

"Stop with the lovey dovey!" Melody said, shaking Kurt's arms. "The situation at hand is my nonexistent love life. What do I do?"

"He likes you?" Kurt asked.

"Well, he says he does…" Melody said, a little shyly.

"And you like him?"

"Obviously." Blaine scoffed, causing Melody to giggle. "Ow, Kurt!"

"You de served that one too." Kurt laughed and then returned his attention to Melody. "I think you should tell Dad that you would like to go on a date. If you talk to him first, he'll feel like he's got power over the situation and it may make him a little more open to the whole thing."

"And if he says no?" Melody asked doubtfully.

"You get Carole involved." Blaine said, nodding very seriously.

"Mom _always _gets her way, Mel. Trust me. Mom gets her way more than me and that is saying something." Kurt nodded. "If Mom likes the idea, it'll happen."

"Okay, and what if it _does _happen? Do we go on a date? Will it be weird?"

"It will be a little awkward at first, but it'll get more comfortable the longer you two are together." Blaine said, running his fingers through Kurt's hair. "The first dates are always awkward, Mellie. But nothing _happens_. Yes, you'll go on a date. But if you've hung out it shouldn't even be that different."

"Plus, it's not about what you do. It's who you're with." Kurt added. "Just wear that fabulous dress I made you and he'll be head over heels in love with you within five minutes."

"You do realize I'm just fourteen and it's not like we're going to get married, right?" Melody asked, looking between them two.

"I vaguely remember saying '_It's not like we're getting married_' once or twice when we started dating." Kurt said, looking at Blaine.

"And I always knew we'd get married." Blaine shrugged, an adorable little smile on his face. "Aw, Melody's about to fall in love, Kurt."

"I'm not going to _fall in love_. I just like him." Melody said, leaning over and kissing both of their cheeks. "Thank you for the advice. I think I will talk to Dad when I get home and, if all else fails, get Mom in on it."

"Did we do well? Did we do well?" Blaine asked excitedly. "I think we did well!"

Melody rolled her eyes and carefully stood, giggling a bit. "Yes, you did well. Congratulations. Do you want a Gives Good Boy Advice badge?"

"I like the color red." Blaine responded, winking at her.

"I'm going to bed now. Plus, I'd kind of like to text Ryan." Melody grabbed her phone off of the coffee table and headed for the hallway, before turning back around. "But really… thanks. I feel a lot better."

"You're welcome, pumpkin." Blaine said as Kurt grinned adorably. "Good night, Melody."

"Good night. Love you two." Melody said before disappearing into the hallway.

Kurt and Blaine waited until they heard the door quietly shut before they looked at each other.

"Aw, Kurt, Melody's about to fall in love." Blaine said, letting out a little sigh. "It's so cute!"

"It is cute." Kurt nodded in agreement, making himself more comfortable on Blaine's lap. "It reminds me of when you first fell in love with me."

"When I met you?"

"No, no, no, sweetie. It was _me _who fell in love right away. I had to wait an agonizing four months before you returned my feelings… and two more before you dropped the l word." Kurt said, shaking his head.

"Yes, but I realized my undying love for you in the end."

"That you did." Kurt leaned forward, about to kiss him, when they were interrupted by a tiny voice.

"_Daddddy…_"

"It's your turn."

"Damn!"


	83. Mercedes' Complaint

"That is a complete fabrication of the truth!" Kurt exclaimed as he sketched.

"It is not. You think I can't hear the breathy sighs and the other noises you two make? I've seen it enough to person to know what it is when I hear it on the phone." Mercedes responded. "It's happened at least twice, White Boy. I'm sure there have been other times you just haven't been caught too."

"Has not." Kurt scoffed. "We're not horny teenage—okay, maybe we are. But we can manage to keep our tongues apart long enough for me to have a phone conversation."

"You are lying through your teeth." Mercedes scoffed this time. "All I'm saying is that you can get off the phone and call me back next time. I know a lot of girls our age would get all hot and bothered by the two of you making out while on the other end of the phone, but not me. Don't deny you haven't done it."

"Okay, okay, okay." Kurt sighed. "Maybe once or twice but no more than that."

"Once or twice is enough."

"I find it interesting that me asking how your date with David ended up on Blaine and I making out." Kurt laughed as Blaine made it home, closing the door to their apartment and arching his eyebrow. Kurt waved at him, smiling warmly.

"Hmph." Mercedes said.

"You did it." Kurt gasped, sitting up straight.

"We did _not_." Mercedes yelped. "Just because we're long distance dating doesn't mean we're going to have sex the first time we see each other."

"Oh, sweetie… I hate to sound like a guy, but I don't think David is the type of guy to wait around six or seven months." Kurt said gently.

"Okay. Leaving the room." Blaine whispered loudly, although he was learning down to give Kurt a kiss.

Kurt pulled his head down to his own, pressing his lips against Blaine's and closing his eyes, turning the speaker phone on and setting his phone down. She wouldn't find out if the phone wasn't right there, right?

"He's a complete gentleman—."

"Yeah right." Blaine mumbled into Kurt's lips. "Mmh."

"Shh." Kurt whispered, leaning back and pulling Blaine on top of him.

"He would never dump me just because we haven't had—."

"He might." Blaine mumbled.

"Shh!" Kurt hissed, sliding his tongue into Blaine's mouth and sliding his hands down to Blaine's hips, causing Blaine to shiver.

"What we have runs deeper than—."

"Doesn't yet." Blaine said. "Oof!"

"Physical attraction—."

"You're so hot." Kurt gasped out, words muffled by Blaine's neck which he began kissing.

"You're hotter." Blaine gasped, tilting his head and letting out a low moan.

"YOU'RE DOING IT AGAIN, KURT! DAMN BOY! NEITHER OF YOU ARE SO ATTRACTIVE THAT YOU CANNOT KEEP YOUR HANDS OFF OF EACH OTHER FOR A DAMN PHONE CONVERSATION!"

Kurt reached over, grabbing the phone. "I'll call you back, 'Cedes."

"Rachel is a better person to talk to on the phone than you." Mercedes snapped.

"You take that back right now—oh God, Blaine, one minute." Kurt groaned as Blaine nipped at his neck, arching his body against Blaine's. "Take it bac—ergh, I've gotta go."

"Damn both of you." Mercedes snapped before hanging up.

"Clothes. Off. Now."


	84. Newlywed Christmas

**-This is three segments. The first takes place Dec 23, second 24th, and third 25th.**

**-Kurt and Blaine have been married about two weeks.**

**-Let's assume Burt snuck Melody a lot of sugary treats when Carole wasn't looking, because this is one _hyper _little girl.**

**-This was way too much fun to write.**

"Why can't I come in, Kurt?" Blaine whined through the closed bedroom door.

"Because I'm wrapping your Christmas presents!" Kurt called. "Go sit on the couch! Dinner is on the table! Eat! You like to do that!"

"But I haven't seen you all day and we're newlyweds! I love you!"

Kurt opened the door, poking his head out.

"Hello." Blaine said, standing on his tiptoes in an effort to see Kurt. While he may have been half an inch taller than Kurt now (thank goodness for that growth spurt his first year of law school), it was still hard to see over his husband.

"Hey!" Kurt snapped, eyes bright. "Stop that, you beggar!"

"Aw, Kurt, I just want to peek." Blaine pouted, moving his head to the right.

"Blaine Wyatt Anderson-Hummel, stop it." Kurt said, moving to the right also.

"Stop what?" Blaine asked innocently. "I'm just moving my head. I've got water in my ear."

"Water in your ear my ass." Kurt said, pushing his way out of the room and closing the door. "You aren't ruining your presents like last year, Blaine."

"I didn't ruin anything."

"You saw every single present but one." Kurt scoffed. "And it was the smallest one."

"I like surprises, but I like getting them more." Blaine grinned. "Besides, I can help you wrap them."

Kurt scowled. "Blaine, come on. Why are you home early anyway?"

"Because I _won my case_!"

"_You won_?!" Kurt asked, blue eyes widening. "The one everyone thought was impossible?"

"_Yes_! You should have seen the boy's mom, Kurt. She cried and hugged me for like three hours. I kind of feel like Santa Claus."

Kurt threw his arms around Blaine, hugging him tightly. "I'm so proud of you."

"Well shucks." Blaine hugged him back and kissed him. "I get to buy you some more presents… if you let me peak in there."

"What kind of presents are we talking about, hmm?" Kurt asked sweetly, hand gripping the doorknob tightly so Blaine couldn't pull anything—and he wouldn't put anything past Blaine when presents were involved after the lengths he went to to spoil himself last year.

"Nice ones. Really nice ones. I've got _all day _to shop tomorrow to find some." Blaine said, smiling adorably. "So you should let me see. I know you like nice things. Like me."

Kurt rolled his eyes. "I can't believe you think you can bribe me with nice things."

"Oh, come on. We're married. We're allowed to do it now without seeming like gold diggers. In fact, most wives probably blackmail their husbands into buying them good things. I'm just honorable enough to give them to you on my own."

"I'm the wife and yet you can't sit through Disney movies without bawling?"

"Kurt, you're not supposed to make fun of things that cause me pain."

"And you're not supposed to imply that I'm your housewife, either."

"But I love your little apron." Blaine protested. "And you always get home first. Can I _please _peak at them, Kurt? I don't want to use them."

"So you're saying that you'll buy me more nice things tomorrow if I _just _let you peek into the bedroom?" Kurt asked slowly.

"Yes, yes, yes. That is _exactly _what I'm saying." Blaine nodded eagerly. "Pretty please?"

"I guess so, but only because you asked _so _nicely." Kurt pushed open the door. Blaine eagerly moved past him, going in, and then he came right back out with a positively adorable frown on his face.

"That was a trap, Kurt."

"Whatever do you mean, my dear husband?" Kurt asked sweetly.

"They're all wrapped. All of them."

"I'm just so mean, making you wait a day and a half for your Christmas presents." Kurt said, wrapping his arms around Blaine's waist and nuzzling his chest.

"Meanest husband ever." Blaine nodded. "I think for that you should let me open one early."

"Oh, I can think of something you can open early." Kurt pulled away and smirked.

"I'll take that too!"

...

"I can't believe we couldn't get any plane tickets and now we have to drive." Kurt sighed from the kitchen table, very carefully putting icing onto cupcakes. "I hope you don't make me listen to Christmas music the whole time."

"Since you're the ones who forgot to get the tickets I should." Blaine sang, putting icing onto his cupcakes but not taking the time to make them look as neat as Kurt's. "We'll listen to Burl Ives since he's your least favorite."

"Are you still grumpy because I tricked you last night?" Kurt giggled, looking up and across the table at his _husband_—he just couldn't get used to that. It had been two weeks to the date since their wedding and he found himself using any excuse to think or say that they were husbands. Because they were… husbands. "You would have thought all that sex would have made up for it."

"Sex make up for trickery and a ten hour drive on Christmas Eve? And having to wake up at five to do this? I don't think so." Blaine said, but he nudged Kurt's foot with his own and smiled.

"You're perpetually horny, Blaine. Sex should make up for anything with you." Kurt laughed. "Think you can handle this while I make potato candy? And no, I won't show you the recipe."

"But why not? You said you'd share the secret recipe when we were married."

"Well now that I've got you, I'm afraid you'll leave." Kurt smiled adorably. "Plus, it's a holiday treat. If I show you how to make it, you'll probably make it once a week."

"I can't argue with that, I suppose." Blaine said, pulling the plate of un-iced cupcakes in front of him and setting to work. "I feel like Finn's going to eyeball me the whole time, Kurt. Now he knows we've had sex."

"What do you mean? He's known."

"_I told you this_. Before our bachelor parties joined together, Finn pulled me aside and told me that he hoped the sex we would be having wouldn't affect our friendship. And that he would try to refrain from being overly protective but he was giving me fair warning that if I hurt you he'd kick my ass. His words, not mine."

"He was joking." Kurt shrugged, setting out the ingredients for potato candy on his large counter.

"No. He wasn't." Blaine said, beginning to hum.

"You know this is going to be our first Christmas as a married couple." Kurt said after several minutes of comfortable silence, not looking up.

Blaine, who had his tongue stuck out in concentration, looked up. "Ha! I told you I would make a dinosaur with a Santa hat."

"Did you really?" Kurt went over to look. "It's kind of deformed."

"No. It's supposed to have a big head and little arms." Blaine protested. "It's_cute_."

"It is cute, but deformed." Kurt said, sliding onto his lap. "Did you hear me?"

"No, what?" Blaine said, looking at him very seriously.

"I said that this is going to be our first Christmas as a married couple." Kurt repeated, wrapping his arms around Blaine's neck.

"I know." Blaine smiled and kissed him.

"Our next first concerning Christmas will be our first Christmas as _parents_." Kurt said, looking into his eyes.

"We've still got a few years before that, though." Blaine said, arms going around Kurt's waist.

"I dunno. I talked you into marrying well before thirty, didn't I?" Kurt teased, kissing him again and pressing their foreheads together. "Don't you want to have a little girl? We can buy those cute fluffy Christmas dresses and put big bows on her head."

Blaine smiled. "Yes, I do. Once we're both established in our careers. We've only been out of school for a little over half a year."

"And you're already winning cases." Kurt kissed him.

"And you've already had offers of people to sponsor you." Blaine kissed Kurt back.

"I am fabulous you know." Kurt giggled a bit and then kissed his jaw.

"We should probably finish this baking so we can start our _ten hour _drive to Lima, my love."

"Fine, fine, fine." Kurt yawned and slid off of the chair. "Back to work we go."

"Only this time you can't tell me I'm Santa's Helper because I'm short. You're shorter than me now." Blaine grinned. "You all underestimated my growing abilities but I proved you _all _wrong. That's right."

…

"Kurt and Blaine are heeeere! Kurt and Blaine are here!" Melody shrieked, running out the front door while tugging on her jacket.

"_Oh my Goooood_!" Blaine shrieked, getting out of the car and running to her, arms open.

Melody jumped into his arms, giggling. "Hi, Blaine!"

"Hi, pumpkin!" Blaine said, giving her a big squeeze. "Did you miss me?"

"Uh huh. Did you have fun at your money dune?" Melody asked, playing with the zipper on his jacket.

"Kurt and I had a lot of fun on our _honeymoon_." Blaine said, carrying her to the car where Kurt was getting out containers of cupcakes and candy. "We saw a lot of neat things!"

"Kuuuurt!" Melody shrieked, wrapping her arms around Kurt's legs when Blaine sat her down. "I love you!"

"I love you too, Mellie!" Kurt smiled. "Wanna take this inside where I can properly hug you?"

"Yeah! Daddy let me stay up and not take a nap because you were almost here! I waited a very long time! And I had to wait to open presents from Santa, but that's okay!"

Melody chirped, taking the container very carefully. "And mommy said that maybe you'd read to me! You and Blaine! At bedtime!"

"Melody, come on in! It's cold out there and they're too nice to tell you to be quiet!" Burt called from the doorway.

Melody sighed and ran up the driveway.

"I swear she's gotten bigger since the wedding." Kurt whispered, handing some containers to Blaine and then closing the door. "We can get our bags in a bit. She might explode in excitement if we stay out here much longer."

"She grows a few inches every day it seems like." Blaine said, smiling happily when they made it to the porch. Melody was in the doorway, jumping up and down excitedly.

"How was the drive? Did you see lots of neat stuff? Did you see funny things? When we're in the car, I like to look at funny people. Sometimes they pick their noses! Mommy says I can't do that!"

"Melody, they aren't even all the way in yet." Carole laughed, coming and scooting her out of the way. "It's cold outside."

"I'm just excited, Mommy!" Melody said, grabbing her mother's hand and leaning towards the ground.

Kurt set the containers he was holding in the kitchen and rushed over, scooping her into his arms and kissing her cheek. "How's my favorite sister?"

"Daddy says I'm hyper!"

"I think Daddy's right." Blaine snorted as Burt hugged him.

"Daddy's been listening to this for two days." Burt said, eyeing them. "You can take her back to New York with you if you want."

"_Really_?" Melody asked, arms around Kurt's neck.

"I don't go back to work until the third." Kurt said, laughing when Melody kissed his cheek.

"You've made me so happy!" she squealed. "Can I really? I can stay with Kurt and Blaine?"

"If they both say it's okay." Carole said. "Remember how they didn't come as early as usual because they just got married and want to spend a lot of time together because they love each other?"

"Well I love them both too." Melody pointed out. "And they say yes. Right, Blaine?"

"Absolutely."

"Brother time!" Melody clapped. "I love my three brothers! But you two are funner to stay with because Finn and Rachel aren't as fun."

"Melody!" Carole gasped.

"Rachel tries to teach me dumb songs." Melody shrugged.

"The Sound of Music is _not_ dumb." Kurt gasped as Blaine began to sing _My Favorite Things_.

"What have I started?" Melody asked dramatically, covering her ears. "It's a madhouse!"

"She thinks it's a madhouse now. Wait until we try to open presents with Finn and Rachel's toddler running around destroying everything. _Then _it will be a madhouse." Carole sighed, shaking her head. "I think we need a bigger house."


	85. Blaine and Carole's First Phone Call

Kurt attempted to roll over in his sleep when Blaine's phone began to rang.

"You're going to hurt yourself." Blaine whispered, gently forcing him back onto his back.

Kurt nuzzled his head, having taken his painkillers recently and not really able to do anything but sleep, and dozed back off.

Blaine let out a relieved sigh (it had been a feat to keep Kurt from rolling onto his side lately since he had _always _slept on that side before his attack) and grabbed his phone.

Why was Carole calling?

"Hello?" Blaine asked, confused. Burt called almost hourly but Carole had only called once before and it had been to remind Blaine of something with Kurt's… diet? Or something?

"Hey, hon!" Carole said cheerfully.

"Uh… hi." Blaine glanced at Kurt before slowly getting off of the bed. Although he was pretty sure Kurt was out, he hated waking Kurt up because sometimes it took _ages _to get him to fall asleep again.

"How are you doing?" Carole asked.

"Oh, we're doing alright. He's asleep now because he took his medicine like an hour and a half ago." Blaine answered, going to the kitchen and pulling out two slices of bread to make a sandwich. He had been dying to make one for a while but wasn't able to justify leaving Kurt—until then, that was. If he couldn't be right by Kurt's side while on the phone… Well, he would have been dumb to _not _take advantage of the opportunity. Besides, he _did _have a black hole for a stomach.

"I was just calling to chat. I know Kurt sleeps through most of the day with his medicine and I thought you might like some form of social interaction even if it's over the phone." Carole explained. "Plus, you've been pretty quiet since we got back from the hospital. You're not trying to get Burt and I to forget you're there are you?"

"No." Blaine let out a nervous laugh because maybe he _had _been. It just felt awkward to go down there and strike up conversations. Besides, he was there to take care of Kurt. Not to mingle with Kurt's family when his boyfriend was in a drug induced nap.

"We like having you at the house." Carole said. "You know, we've _always _liked you at the house. You're always so cheerful and peppy. You're a great person to be around."

Blaine smiled a bit. "Thanks."

"So you shouldn't feel like you have to hide. Burt and I would _love _your company downstairs when Kurt's asleep." Carole concluded.

"Thanks." Blaine repeated, sitting at the table with his sandwich.

"How are you _really _doing? This has been hard on everyone." Carole asked.

Blaine frowned, staring down at his food. "I'm fine."

"Are you sure? If you need to talk about what happened to Kurt, or stress, or anything, you should." Carole reassured him.

"If I talked about what happened to Kurt, nice things wouldn't come out of my mouth, and it's just…" Blaine trailed off. "It sucks but if I talk about it I'm going to get _mad. _Madder than I already am. I just need to focus on taking care of him and getting him eating as much as he should and getting him walking again without support and…"

"Talking may help."

"No. Talking will make _me _look like a bad person because some of the things I would say… I don't even like _thinking _but I can't _help it_. What they did to Kurt… It's disgusting and inhumane and to know there will never be justice for him… it makes me think things that would send me to hell if I was Christian." Blaine glared at the table. His voice was calm but he didn't feel it. Not at all.

"Thinking things like that doesn't make you a bad person, Blaine. They hurt someone you love." Carole's voice was gentle.

"I do love him. A lot. And I didn't offer to move up here out of obligation or to look like a good boyfriend. I hope you all know that. I really and truly love Kurt with everything in me and I'll never stop. No matter what happens between us." Blaine swallowed hard.

"We do know that. That's why Burt resigned so quickly." Carole said.

Blaine took a bite of his sandwich..

"We're worried about you. I am more than he." Carole admitted. "What you're taking on at such a young age… It's outstanding, Blaine. You are genuinely a good person. I know you were lying when you said you talked to your parents about leaving UK. Or about Kurt's attack. Kurt told me."

Blaine set his sandwich back down.

"It breaks my heart that you can't go to them about how you're feeling or what's going on now because if I were in your shoes, I would really need someone to talk to." Carole continued. "And I just want you to know that you can always talk to me and anything you may need to say will be in confidence. You're helping Kurt but you're also helping Burt and I out tremendously. I'd hate to think you're going through stuff too without someone to talk to."

Blaine swallowed hard, feeling tears prickling his eyes. Well, _that _was annoying. Why was he getting so emotional?

"Because sooner or later, you'll want to talk about it. I'll be here when you are. And until then, I'd really like to get to know you better."

Blaine wiped his eyes, trying his hardest not to sniffle—and succeeding.

"After all, you're halfway to being my son-in-law already." Carole teased.

Blaine let out a laugh.

"But, really. I care about you a lot. We all do. So stop hiding out. We want you here." Carole reassured him. "And we'd rather you with us when Kurt doesn't need you than holed up there in a room by yourself. I think we'd all like to get to know you a little better."

"Okay." Blaine said, fighting the urge to sniffle again.

"And tonight I'm taking you out to dinner so you can get away from the house for a bit. It was Burt's idea so don't try to fight it."

"But Kurt—."

"Will be just fine with Burt." Carole reassured him. "And if it makes you feel better, we'll just get something to go. You need out of that house, sweetie. Just for a bit each day."

"Okay." Blaine nodded, because really, he had spent a lot of time locked up in rooms with Kurt for the past… five weeks? Where did time _go?_

"I've got to get back to work, hon. If you need anything at all, you just call and I'll pick up." Carole said cheerfully. "And the card is on the counter if you want to order some pizza. I haven't been to the store yet and I know you and Finn have been eating sandwiches all week."

Blaine laughed again. "Okay… Thanks, Carole."

"You're welcome, sweetie. I'll see you later."

"Bye." Blaine hung up and bit his lip to keep from smiling. He could tell he and Carole were going to get along really, really well.


	86. Pocket Watch

"Blaine, can I ask you something?" Kurt asked, looking up from his seat on the couch where he was sketching.

"Yes?" Blaine, who was curled on the loveseat looking over case papers, looked up as well.

"Why in the hell were you wearing a pocket watch?"

"Excuse me?" Blaine's eyebrow shot up. "What are you talking about?"

"Your pocket watch. The first time we met at Dalton, you were wearing a pocket watch."

"No, I wasn't." Blaine said, staring at Kurt as though he was insane. "I have no idea what you're talking about, Kurt. I don't even _own _a pocket watch."

"You had on a pocket watch!" Kurt exclaimed, laughing. "You were coming down the front stairway at Dalton—which was _not _a shortcut, by the way— and then you looked at me. Remember?"

"I remember coming down the stairway and seeing you but I promise to you, I don't own a pocket watch."

"Was it your grandfather's?" Kurt asked, rolling his eyes.

"They would never have given me one of his pocket watches." Blaine said, looking at Kurt.

"You were wearing one. It was gold." Kurt argued.

"Kurt I know we've been together more than ten years but you're too young to be making stuff up in your head." Blaine rolled his own eyes this time.

"I'm not making it up." Kurt sighed. "You really did have one. You looked up from it and saw me and you were like a Disney prince or something. And then you put it in your pocket."

"No. I'm pretty sure you're wrong." Blaine shook his head. "In two months we'll have babies and you're already losing your mind. This is supposed to come _after _the twins get here."

"Are you messing with me? Because, to be quite honest, it's _weird_. What seventeen year old has a pocket watch, Blaine?" Kurt put his sketchbook up and then sat on Blaine's lap. "I won't make fun of you."

"Just because I'm oblivious doesn't mean I'm gullible. I'm not going to admit to having a pocket watch I don't _have_." Blaine set his papers on the floor, hands going to Kurt's waist. "You're getting old."

"Shut up! You can't say I'm getting old until I'm 45." Kurt scowled.

"You'll be a cute old man." Blaine rubbed their noses together. "Yelling at the great great grandkids to keep it down."

"I hope I don't live to see my great great grandkids. That would be _really_old."

"I hope you live to be that old." Blaine kissed his check. "Plus, like Katy Perry said. _We'll be young forever_."

Kurt rolled his eyes. "It doesn't matter how long we're together. You're always going to insist of singing me lyrics from Teenage Dream."

"Well it did make you fall in love with me." Blaine kissed him on the lips and beamed after Kurt kissed him back.

"If we do live to be that old, it will be age appropriate for you to have a pocket watch." Kurt pointed out, glancing up as a toddler pranced into the house. "Hello, Scarlett."

"Where's food?" Scarlett asked, making a sharp turn and stopping by the loveseat.

"Scarlett, how many times have I told you? I have no problem with you bursting into houses but Mommy does and when I let you do it, _I _get in trouble." Wes came into the living room. "Sup, dudes?"

"Yes! Perfect!" Kurt stood, clapping his hands together. "Did Blaine or did Blaine not have a pocket watch the day we met?"

"I have no idea what he's talking about." Blaine said, subtly shaking his head at Wes.

"I have no idea what you're talking about either, Kurtsie." Wes said before winking at Blaine when Kurt looked up at the ceiling in frustration. "Chill out. I know the daddy hormones are kicking in because the due date is getting closer but I mean really, it'll be fine. If _she _isn't dead yet, anyone can do it."

Kurt glanced at Scarlett, who was trying to climb onto the stair banister. "To be entirely honest, Wes, I'm kind of surprised she's still alive."

"Yeah well you can't deny I make cute babies." Wes said.

Blaine gestured that Kurt was crazy by rotating his index finger by his head and then shrugging one shoulder.

"I can see you in the TV reflection!" Kurt exclaimed. "You need to quit bullying me. I should have had a baby with someone nice!"

"But they wouldn't have been adorable like _me_." Blaine gave a sweet smile.

"Come on, Scarlett. I think I've got some cookies." Kurt said, holding his hand out. When Scarlett took it, he led her into the kitchen asking about her day. "Let's go away from the mean old lawyer who works with grumpy old men and is turning into a butthead."

"You did have a pocket watch. Remember? Someone dropped it?" Wes whispered.

"I know but it's too fun to mess with him now." Blaine grinned. He let out a yelp when an apple hit the back of his head.

"You know what is too fun for me? The fact that you're predictable and couldn't even wait for me to make it all the way into the kitchen before admitting it. Sucker." Kurt poked his head around the corner, scowling.

"Yeah, sucker!" Scarlett said, attempting to snap her fingers but really just clicking them together.

"You know I thought being gay would get me out of the pregnancy hormones but I guess I was mistaken." Blaine rubbed his head.

"At least your babies were planned." Wes snorted, getting a wide smile when Scarlett came back into the room seconds later with a cookie. He then broke into a run before grabbing her and scooping her into his arms. "Did you thank Kurt for the cookie?"

"No." Scarlett shook her head.

"Just like your daddy." Wes beamed.


	87. Sick Melody

"Oh no, I didn't miss Burt, Carole, and Mellie did I?" Blaine asked coming into Kurt's apartment and dropping his bag onto the floor.

"As if they would leave before they saw you knowing you were on the way. Melody is on the couch and Dad and Carole are out and about. " Kurt stepped up to him, wrapping his arms around Blaine's neck. "Mmmh, hello."

"Hi." Blaine smiled and kissed him.

"How did your exam go? And work?" Kurt asked, nuzzling Blaine's shoulder.

"The exam went well and work was alright. They still don't let me do much but eh." Blaine shrugged and kissed the top of his head. "When is Quinn due back?"

"Probably not for at least a week." Kurt pulled away and shrugged.

"_Mellllllie!" _Blaine called, going into the living room. "Oh no, pumpkin, what's wrong?"

"I w-w-want m-m-my mommy!" Melody, who was curled up on the couch, began to loudly cry.

"What's wrong?" Kurt rushed over, checking her arms. "Did you fall off the couch or something? Did you get hurt? Did Kreacher bite you?"

"I d-d-don't feel g-g-good!" Melody cried, holding her arms open.

"Oh, sweetie." Kurt scooped her up. "Mommy and Daddy will be back later. They can't come home right now."

Melody buried her face in the crook between his neck and shoulder, tiny shoulders shaking.

"Oh, sweetie. It's okay." Kurt said, bouncing her up and down gently. "It's alright."

"Where do you feel sick at?" Blaine asked, rubbing her back. "Is it your tummy?"

Melody lifted her head and nodded, wiping her teary eyes. "U-Uh huh."

"That's not fun at all, hmm?" Blaine reached over and ruffled her hair.

"N-Nuh uh." Melody shook her head.

"Why don't you let Blaine give you a hug since you haven't seen him in a few months," Kurt whispered, handing Melody off. "And I'll go and get you some 7 Up to settle your tummy."

Melody wrapped one arm around Blaine's neck, sniffling.

"Big brother Kurt is gonna make it all better." Blaine said, rocking her and giving her a big smile. "He's really good at taking care of sick people."

"I-Is he?" Melody sniffled again.

"Mhmm. The best." Blaine nodded and smiled. "You taking care of my kitty, I take it?"

"U-Uh huh." Melody nodded. "She misses you."

"Ohhhh, I'm sure she's just fine in your capable hands." Blaine patted her back. "You're like, what, eight now?"

"Noooo." Melody giggled a bit.

"You aren't a day older than twelve." Blaine gasped.

"I'm five." Melody nuzzled his shoulder and sniffled again.

"Fifty?" Blaine laughed.

"You're too much trouble." Melody mumbled into his shoulder.

"Oh, you've been talking to Kurt, haven't you?" Blaine teased. "You've got it all wrong, little sister. Kurt is too much trouble. Have you seen the shopping he can do?"

"Don't pick on me." Kurt came back into the room with a plastic cup of 7 Up. "This is just what the doctor ordered, Mellie. Drink up."

Melody grabbed the cup and began drinking in big gulps, not stopping until it was all gone.

"I told you she's spending too much time around Finn." Kurt sighed.

"M-My tummy still hurts." Melody said, lip starting to tremble again as she reached for Kurt. "Kurt, my tummy hurts."

"C'mere, baby." Kurt took her back and gently sat on the couch, rocking her. "Do you want to snuggle? We can find a movie and snuggle with Blaine."

"We can snuggle?" she asked hopefully.

"Of course we can." Kurt kissed her cheek. "And maybe your tummy ache will go away."

"Can Oreo snuggle too, Kurt?" Melody said, nuzzling his chest.

"I think that can be arranged." Kurt reached over, pulling Melody's Disney Princess blanket over her as Blaine went in search of Oreo.

"Look who I found." Blaine said happily, coming over and placing Oreo on the couch next to Kurt. She wasted no time and scooting right up to Melody and purring loudly.

"And now Blaine must join." Kurt said, scooting over and easing Melody onto the actual couch as Blaine sat down. She immediately laid over them, her head on Blaine's lap and her tiny feet on Kurt's.

"Poor thing." Blaine ruffled her light brown hair.

"Does your tummy feel better at all, Mellie Boo?" Kurt asked.

Melody did not answer, however, because she was fast asleep with Oreo curled up at her side.


	88. Skinny Dipping

"Absolutely not." Kurt hissed as Blaine tugged off his own shirt. "We'll get arrested and we're in another country and they'll hold us captive for twenty years and I'll never make it onto the cover of Vogue and your hair will grow at an alarming rate until it suffocates both of us in our small cell."

"Don't be too dramatic, Kurt. People might think you've never left America before." Blaine snorted, pulling Kurt out of the hotel building and towards the empty pool.

"But I _haven't _left America before. I'm pretty sure we have a pool right outside of _our _room for our private use. Why don't—."

"That's beside the point. We should do something _exciting_. That is pretty much expected." Blaine grinned and jumped into the pool. "Join me?"

"I don't know how to swim. And this pool is closed."

"I don't see a sign saying it's closed." Blaine said innocently, blinking up at Kurt with bright hazel eyes.

"Blaine Anderson." Kurt said in a warning tone.

"Hummel."

"What?"

"It's Blaine Anderson-_Hummel _now." Blaine grinned adorably. "Come here, Kurt."

"I don't know how to swim."

"You're a liar." Blaine swam to the edge of the pool and motioned for him to come closer.

"But Blaine—."

Blaine reached down and then tossed his boxers onto the ground next to his t-shirt and jeans.

"Bu—Blaine…" Kurt said, staring at them.

"Don't make me get out and come get you. I will. I'm not one for modesty… At least, not after drinks at dinner." Blaine smirked.

Kurt heaved a big sigh and took his pants off, neatly folding them and placing them on a chair. He then took off his shirt. "Are you sure you aren't borderline drunk?"

"Why don't you come closer and see how much alcohol is on my breath?" Blaine swam back, making room for Kurt to safely get in without slipping.

"Blaine, if we're arrested, I'm divorcing you as soon as we get back to America eight years from now." Kurt threatened.

"I'll find you a good lawyer." Blaine winked.

Kurt carefully got into the water, squealing a bit when Blaine reached down to pull off his boxers. "Blaine!"

"Yes, dear?" Blaine tossed Kurt's boxers onto his pile of clothes and tugged him into his arms.

"I really think we should be a little more discreet." Kurt whispered.

"Nobody is around to hear you." Blaine laughed, clearly amused.

Kurt halfheartedly hit Blaine's arm and then looked around.

"Can't swim my ass." Blaine stepped away.

"Well it's been a while." Kurt swam back up to him and then smiled. "This water does feel nice."

"Yep. Hope nobody's peed in it lately." Blaine chirped.

"Blaine!"

"Relax. I saw them cleaning the water on our way back from dinner." Blaine reassured him, kissing him. "I'm surprised you actually got in."

"Yeah well I've been doing a lot of surprising things lately, haven't I?" Kurt asked, kissing him back. "Like marrying a nutter like you."

"Nutter? You must have talked to Wes' dad at David's wedding. He's the only one that calls me that." Blaine laughed loudly.

"To your face." Kurt teased, lacing their fingers together.

"Why didn't we come here for our honeymoon?" Blaine asked. "I always liked France."

"Because you had to help on a case that was five days after our wedding." Kurt remarked.

"And you had to start prelim stuff for Fashion Week." Blaine added.

"Too bad none of it was my work." Kurt sighed a bit and then wrapped his hands around Blaine's neck. "Kiss me?"

"Okay." Blaine grinned, resting his hands on Kurt's face and kissing him heatedly.

Kurt moaned, backing against the wall of the pool and wrapping his legs around Blaine's waist.

"For someone who didn't want to skinny dip, you sure are making things escalate pretty quickly." Blaine mumbled into his lips.

"Skinny dip sounds so crude." Kurt wrinkled his nose up.

"Kurt, shut up." Blaine pulled Kurt's mouth back to his own, pressing against him.

Kurt moaned, letting his hands roam Blaine's back.

"I love France, I love France." Blaine pulled away before kissing Kurt again, shivering when Kurt's hand went to his ass.

"J'aime la France, j'aime la France." Kurt giggled a bit.

"I barely passed French, but what you said." Blaine gasped out.

"I said what you said." Kurt giggled again, kissing down Blaine's neck.

"It _is _him!"

Kurt and Blaine flew apart with record speed, both looking up sheepishly.

"You guys are, like, so cute." One girl said, excitedly sitting on the edge of the pool.

"You work for Joseph Altuzarra. You can always tell when you helped design a piece. They're so much better when you do them." A second girl said. "Can we have your autograph?"

"You should really go solo."

"Is this your husband? You're both hotter in person."

"Unless you're having an affair in which case we never saw you here."

"But seriously, an autograph."

"You two are seriously the next Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka."

"We love gay guys."

"Sign a damn autograph." Blaine whispered in Kurt's ear, smiling brightly at the girls.

"Uh… sure. Thanks." Kurt fumbled, more horrified that these girls walked up on them about to have sex than anything else. He tried to not be _too _annoyed considering these were the first girls to ask for his autograph or actually recognize him for his work - and they weren't even in America. But damn. They were really annoying.

"I'll be right back!" The first girl announced before running off.

"How often do you two do it?" The second girl tilted her head.

"We're actually celibate." Blaine said, expression serious.

"Oh my God, Becky, you can't just ask them how often they have sex." The first girl scoffed, coming back and holding out a pen and two sheets of paper.

Kurt scribbled an autograph for each girl and gave an awkward smile. "Thank you girls."

"Does this mean we can't have sex?" Blaine pouted as the girls left the pool room.

"What do you think?" Kurt asked, reaching for his boxers. "Do you think they noticed?"

Blaine pulled his clothes on and grabbed his cell phone. "Judging by twitter…. Yes."


	89. Thanksgiving Day Surprise

"You have been baking for _hours_." Blaine whined, leaning over the side of the counter that Kurt wasn't baking on.

"You have dated me and therefore been in my family for seven years, Blaine. You know how it goes." Kurt rolled his eyes.

"Yeah but this is probably the first day I've had off since last Christmas." Blaine pointed out. "And how many days will we have off before there are two little feet padding around?"

"I thought we agreed we weren't going to get excited until it had been a while. You know that…"

"We have to leave in a bit." Kurt said. "And I still have to pack up the potato candy and cupcakes and cookies. We really should have left yesterday so I could have spent all day baking in Ohio."

"Well I didn't get off in enough time. He kept us there for ages." Blaine went to the other side of the counter, sliding his arms around Kurt's waist and kissing his neck.

"He loves you. He would have let you come home if you asked." Kurt stated, turning and kissing him quickly.

"I'm not doing anything to risk getting this promotion." Blaine said very seriously.

"You've got it. He told you that you'd have the first one if the first six months in New York went well and you got it within three months. He told you you'd get this one if you got whatever number that was and you got it too." Kurt reassured him, leaning back against Blaine momentarily.

"Mmmh yeah. I guess. I still want to do good." Blaine kissed Kurt's shoulder and gave him a squeeze. "Can I help you?"

"Are you going to actually help or sneak potato candy when I'm distracted?"

"Maybe a little bit of both." Blaine grinned. "Since you 'didn't make me my own plate' I should get first dibs."

"You know I made you your own set. Shut up." Kurt giggled and kissed him.

"How big of a set are we talking?" Blaine asked, eyebrow raising.

"Shut up!" Kurt giggled again and turned to face him, arms going around Blaine's waist.

"Make me." Blaine giggled, leaning into Kurt.

Kurt wrapped his legs around Blaine's, leaning forward to kiss him, when his phone began to ring.

"Melody." They said together.

"I'll get it." Blaine smirked and grabbed Kurt's phone out of his back pocket.

Kurt rolled his eyes and shook his head.

"Hey, pumpkin!" Blaine said into the phone, winking at Kurt.

"When are you _leaving_?" Melody asked loudly without a hello.

"When we leave." Kurt said loud enough for her to hear.

Blaine swatted his arm and then backed away, letting Kurt get back to his cupcakes.

"Speaker phone." Kurt mouthed, grabbing a tube of orange icing.

"Ignore Kurt. He's being mean." Blaine teased as he put the speaker phone on and set it by the counter.

"Wash your hands." Kurt whispered before Blaine could grab a cupcake to decorate.

"Your back pocket isn't that dirty." Blaine rolled his eyes but did as told.

"I'm bored and Aunt Rachel keeps trying to make me sing those songs. I don't like to sing!" Melody pouted.

"Sweetie, we have to finish decorating the cupcakes and then we're going to leave. We probably won't make it until you go to sleep." Kurt said. "We're driving because Blaine forgot to order the tickets."

"Hey, you did it last time."

"Last time was Christmas and we had just gotten back from our honeymoon. What is your excuse?" Kurt asked.

"Well I was on the computer about to order them and then you came in with the—."

Melody huffed loudly. "Can't you just come now?"

Kurt rolled his eyes, making a turkey on one of the cupcakes.

"Don't you want cupcakes?"

"Yeah…" Melody said. "But I'm bored. I miss you!"

"We miss you too, sweetheart." Kurt said. "What's dad doing?"

"Daddy is at the garage and momma's making pumpkin pie."

"Oh god, yes." Blaine groaned.

Kurt rolled his eyes. "We'll drive as fast as we can, okay? _I'll _drive. That will get us there at least an hour and a half earlier."

Melody giggled loudly as Blaine scowled.

"I'm not slow of a driver."

"Yes, honey. You are." Kurt gave him a sweet smile, placing several completed cupcakes in a carrier.

Melody giggled again. "Just come sooooon?"

"Okay, okay, okay. We'll come soon." Blaine laughed. "We'll call you when we're on our way and bihourly with updates."

"What's that mean?" Melody asked, and they could just see her tilting her head.

"Every two hours." Kurt supplied.

"So that means a lot?" Melody questioned.

"Yep! At least three or four calls!"

"Okay. Bye, boys!" Melody said before hanging up.

"She's so abrupt when she gets off of the phone." Kurt laughed.

"I think she gets it from you, Mr. Okayloveyoubye!" Blaine laughed also, adding three more cupcakes he'd just decorated into the container.

"Blaine?" Kurt questioned, looking at him.

"Yes, my love?"

"Let's just go. I want to see our family." Kurt said, popping the lid onto the icing.

"I'll round up the animals." Blaine clapped his hand together and yelled out, "PUPPPPPIES!"

"Like that will wor—my God. They came."

"I am the dog god!" Blaine let out an evil laugh and scooped both dogs up. He then yelped when the youngest dog bit his arm. "I thought you loved me!"

The dog yipped and licked his face.

"Yeah, you beggar. You've been spending too much time with Kreacher."

Kreacher whined, nuzzling Blaine's shoulder.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. You too, mutt."

…

"KURT!" Melody shrieked early the next morning, running into the kitchen and wrapping her arms around her brother's legs.

"Mellie!" Kurt said, scooping her up and hugging her. "Look at how big you are!"

Melody giggled and hugged him tightly.

"Shh, Mellie. Blaine is still asleep." Carole said quietly, coming into the room. "Want to help Kurt and I make dinner? I bet Kurt will let you help him with the mashed potatoes."

Kurt gasped. "Mashed potato buddy!"

Melody giggled again and noisily scooted a chair up to the stove.

"I don't think Blaine will get much sleep." Kurt laughed, smiling.

"Well the poor thing never gets to sleep in." Carole shook her head.

"Don't listen to him. He barely gets out of bed on Sundays." Kurt corrected her. "And I'm pretty sure on Saturdays when he does paperwork, he and his boss are just plotting world domination."

"Does he still have that same boss?" Burt, who was at the table reading the paper, asked.

"Yeah. I don't think he'll ever let Blaine go." Kurt snorted, watching Melody very carefully as she stirred the mashed potatoes. The second he looked away, she pulled the spoon out and licked it.

"Melody Elizabeth!" Carole gasped.

"What?" Melody asked, covering her mouth that was full.

Burt chuckled, hiding behind the paper.

"I really think she's Blaine's sister and not mine." Kurt shook his head and then ruffled Melody's hair.

"When is Blaine gonna wake up?" Melody questioned.

"When he feels like it." Carole said, trying to sound stern. "After all, you two will need all the sleep you can get.."

Kurt's eyebrow shot up. "Why's that?"

"Oh, I don't know. I'm sure you two are very tired." Carole said quickly.

"Did Blaine tell you…" Kurt trailed off.

"Did I say what?" Blaine came into the kitchen, yawning.

"About… you know." Kurt eyed Blaine.

"Did I miss something?" Burt lowered the paper. "Morning, Blaine."

"Morning." Blaine smiled brightly and then ran to pick Melody up.

"When is the baby coming?" Melody chirped.

Blaine nearly dropped her. "What?!"

"What?!" Burt asked also.

"Finn ruined the surprise!" Melody squeaked.

"Did you tell Finn?" Kurt exclaimed.

"He has the biggest mouth _ever_. Why would I tell Finn?" Blaine scoffed. "Wait, did you tell Rachel? You said I couldn't tell Wes and David. If you told Rachel…"

"Oh, like you didn't tell Wes and David anyway. I heard you on the phone talking about cribs and—."

"Would someone care to tell me what's going on?" Burt asked, raising his voice to be heard over Kurt and Blaine.

"Daddy, Quinn is having a baby!" Melody shrieked. "For Kurt and Blaine!"

"Who told Finn?" Kurt asked slowly.

"Puck!" Melody clapped.

"Puck?" Blaine and Kurt asked together.

"Do you think that means…" Kurt began.

"They're just friends." Melody supplied. "But Rachel said that he wants her. What's that mean?"

"How does my little sister know more about the gossip between my friends than I do?" Kurt asked, looking confused.

"Wait, wait, wait. Is this true?" Burt asked.

"Oh, of course it's true. They came two days later because Blaine's working extra. And I saw Quinn at the store yesterday and she's gained a bit of weight." Carole nodded.

"You're having a baby?!" Burt stood, eyes wide.

Both Kurt and Blaine got the most ridiculous grins on their faces.

"Dad, it's still really early. We were going to tell everyone over dinner, though, so don't say anything to grammy or grandpa or Taylor or Paige. She's about eight weeks along." Kurt said, running to hug Burt.

"How long have you known? This is the stuff you tell me!" Burt said, hugging Kurt tightly and then moving to hug Blaine.

"She told us five days ago." Blaine laughed, hugging him back.

"We knew you were trying, but you didn't say anything." Carole said. "I mean, when Finn said something I thought it couldn't be true because you know sometimes he has those conspiracy theories but I saw her and her mother at the grocery store and she's gotten a bit bigger."

"We went with her and saw the ultra sound." Kurt said, turning the burner off and lowering Melody onto the ground.

"Do you have it with you?"

"We both carry a copy like everywhere." Blaine laughed, going to get a copy for them. He returned moments later. "It's like a peanut glob."

Burt looked at Kurt before pulling him into another hug.

"Oh, how precious!" Carole cooed, looking.

"I wanna see! I wanna see!" Melody began bouncing up and down.

"We have cooking to do!" Kurt laughed. "Grandma and Grandpa will be here soon. And Taylor and Paige."

Carole bent down, showing Melody the picture.

"It doesn't look like a baby to me." Melody tilted her head, looking confused. "It looks like a flubber."

"It's a cute flubber though, isn't it?" Blaine grinned and kissed Melody's cheek.

"Kurt is right, though. We have to get the turkey out and start making the rest of the stuff." Carole said as Burt bent to see the picture.

"Daddy, are you sure Kurt and Blaine aren't having an alien?" Melody whispered loudly as Blaine grabbed a piece of potato candy and Kurt went back to the stove with Carole.

"I don't know. It looks more like a chicken nugget to me." Burt chuckled.

Melody busted into a fit of giggles. "Will they be like animals and try to eat it?"

"Well, Blaine does eat a lot." Kurt chirped from the stove, ducking when Blaine tried to smack him upside the head. "Blaine, don't you dare come over here with that!"

Blaine grinned, smearing some of the icing off of his cupcake and onto Kurt's cheek. "I am the cannibal god!"

"You can't be the dog god and the cannibal god, Blaine." Kurt rolled his eyes.

"I can be whatever I want to be, Kurt. I have a Harvard degree."

"Can't argue with that." Blaine chuckled as Blaine high fived Melody.

…

"It's so weird." Blaine yawned later that day, squished on the couch between Kurt and a dead-to-the-world Melody. He ruffled Melody's hair.

"What?"

"Well usually I stop by David and Wes' on Thanksgiving… but David's away in another country on vacation and Wes is still in New York with his _family_. Like, not his family but his wife and baby." Blaine kind of shrugged. "I feel like we're growing up."

"We're both graduated from finishing school. I'd say we're grown ups." Kurt said in a teasing voice, making eye contact with Blaine.

"Think we'll ever not come here?" Blaine whispered, grabbing Kurt's hand.

"I don't know. I'm so used to it, but everything changes when you have your own family." Kurt responded, shrugging. "I guess we'll just have to see what happens."

"Kurt… this time next year, we're going to have a _baby_." Blaine looked down at Melody.

"Remember when she was a baby?"

"Remember when she had the poop explosion?" Blaine giggled.

"Yeah. I also remember you running away from that." Kurt laughed quietly and watched Melody snuggle up closer to Blaine. "You can't run away from any more… especially since it's your offspring."

Blaine hung his head. "But poop is gross."

"Should have thought of that before you masturbated into a cup."

Blaine cringed and then looked down at Melody again. "She's gotten so big so fast. Our little one will do that too."

"I know we agreed we wouldn't get our hopes up until we were past the first trimester… but I can't stop thinking about it." Kurt admitted. "And I want to start buying all of the baby things and looking at names and buying the books."

"But what if… it doesn't…"

"It's going to be okay." Kurt promised, squeezing his hand. "We can let ourselves be excited."

"Okay. Can I go warm up some left overs and we talk about baby names then? I have a three page long list—girls and boy." Blaine eased up and then ran into the kitchen.

Kurt got up, following him and giddily grabbing his hand. "You have a list?"

"I made it an hour after we found out." Blaine confessed.

"First girl name?" Kurt asked.

"Emma."

"Boy name?"

"Elvendork."

Kurt burst into loud laughter.

"Do you even know what that's from?" Blaine asked, grinning.

"N-No but I love you." Kurt gasped out.

"It's Harry Potter related. The prequel. You never made it past the second book, did you?" Blaine asked. "I let you borrow that book before we started dating, Kurt."

"I know, I know. I'm not as much of a reader as you." Kurt nuzzled his shoulder.

"Nicholas."

"Hmm?"

"I like the name Nicholas for a boy." Blaine shrugged, getting a plate of food and putting it into the microwave. "Emma or Nicholas."'

"Well I like Zachary and Sophia." Kurt said. Grabbing Blaine's hand and squeezing it.

"As long as it's a healthy baby, I don't care if it's a girl or boy or what we name it. I just want a healthy baby." Blaine said.

"I really hope it's a girl. I don't think I could handle a son." Kurt bit his lip.

"I'm sure you'd handle a son just fine." Blaine said confidently, dropping Kurt's hand and wrapping his arms around Kurt's waist. "I could see you outside playing with a little boy, you know? Chasing him around the yard and laughing when he decides to chase you."

"You're what I'm thankful for." Kurt whispered into Blaine's shoulder. "I know I say it every year, Blaine, but you are. I don't know what I would do without you in my life."

Blaine smiled, tightening his grip on his husband. "I'm thankful for you and for our baby. I don't need anything else."

Kurt smiled, lighting up his whole face.

"Ooh, food!" Blaine chirped when the microwave sounded. "I need that too."

Kurt kissed his cheek and let him go. "Alright. Let's sit in the living room while you eat? I want to talk about our baby some more."

Blaine grabbed his plate and nodded, pouting when Kurt grabbed a piece of turkey off of his plate.

"Hey, what's yours is mine." Kurt said, eyebrow quirking up.

"I need to find me a lawyer. I don't like this deal very much." Blaine teased, giggling when Kurt punched him lightly in the arm.

"I meant it when I said I was thankful for you." Kurt said, smiling.

"Because I let you take my food and don't complain too much?"

"Because you let me take your food and don't complain too much." Kurt grinned and ate another piece of Blaine's turkey.

He always had loved Thanksgiving.


	90. Tenth Anniversary

"DON'T GO!" Sophie wailed, arms wrapped tightly around Blaine's neck. "NO DADDY NO!"

"Sophie… You're going to be with Grandma and Grandpa." Kurt said, rubbing her little back as the twins excitedly began showing Burt their Christmas list.

"NO NO NO NO!" Sophie clung to Blaine.

"Baby, come here." Kurt said, trying to coax Sophie away from Blaine who may or may not have been temporarily deaf.

Sophie reached for him, clinging to him and beginning to wail louder. "D-D-DADDY!"

"Sophie, Sophie, Sophie." Kurt bounced her up and down, kissing her forehead. "Sophie, Sophie, Sophie."

"It's okay, Monkey." Blaine cooed, ruffling her hair. "It's only for a few days. You're going to have so much fun with Grandma and Grandpa and Auntie Melody that you won't even know Daddy and I are gone."

"N-No!" Sophie whined.

"It's time to be a big girl, Sophie." Kurt said in a firm voice. "Daddy and I need to get you and the boys set up in the car so we can catch our flight. We can't do that if you don't act like a big girl."

"You and Daddy need to _staaaay_!"

"Sophie, come on now." Blaine sighed a bit. "We can't sit and do this all day."

"She probably wants us to miss the flight." Kurt sighed as well, rubbing Sophie's little back. "Sophie, remember what we talked about? You're a very big five year old and that means you have to act like a mature young lady. Do mature young ladies sit in airport parking lots and throw temper tantrums?"

"Y-Y-Yes!"

"Are Zachy and Nicky acting like this?" Blaine asked.

"N-No!" Sophie buried her face in Kurt's neck. "Don't!"

"Sophie, Grandma and Melody are real excited to see you." Burt said, coming closer.

"I don't care!"

"That would be the Kurt in her coming out." Blaine joked, earning a glare from both Kurt and Sophie. "Alright, cool the double glare. It was a joke!"

"Don't get yourself in trouble there, Blaine." Burt chuckled. "Sophie, it's time to go byebye with Grandpa."

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

"Sophia Lily Anderson-Hummel." Kurt said, no longer bouncing her. "We do not act like that, especially not to Dad."

"He's _grandpa_." Nicky corrected.

"Not now, Nick." Blaine whispered as the twins giggled.

"Stop the waterworks, Sophia." Kurt said firmly.

Sophie crossed her arms over her chest, lip still trembling but no longer crying.

"Daddy and I can't stay here all day and do this." Kurt said, voice much gentler. "So you have to be a big girl for us, okay?"

"B-But—." Sophie whimpered.

"You get to have sleepovers with Melody. How cool does that sound?" Blaine gasped. "Aunt Melody is so cool, isn't she?

"Really?" Sophie asked, sniffling.

"She's very excited." Burt added. "She wants to see you. She'd be awful sad if you had to go with Kurt and Blaine."

"I can go with Daddy and Daddy?" Sophie asked eagerly.

"No." Kurt and Blaine said together.

"It's going to be super boring." Burt said. "They're going to read the newspaper all day."

Sophie scrunched her nose up adorably.

"And they're going to watch boring TV shows." Burt continued.

"Grandpa will have a TV with cartoons and the Disney channel." Kurt gasped.

"Disney?"

"We've got _two _Disney channels." Burt said. "And all of Daddy and Melody's movies too."

Kurt kissed Sophie's cheek, making a loud "mwah!" sound. "So give Daddy a big hug?"

Sophie contemplated for nearly a full minute before wrapping her arms around Kurt's neck, this time in a tight hug. She giggled a bit and kissed his nose. "Bye, Daddy!"

"Bye, honey." Kurt kissed her forehead and gave her a tight squeeze before passing her over to Blaine.

"Ohhhh, my heavy thing." Blaine grunted, hugging her.

"It's 'cause I'm a big girl." Sophie chirped, hugging him back tightly. "Bye, Daddy."

"Bye bye, my love. I love you oh so much." Blaine kissed her cheek. "You're going to be a good girl for Grandma and Grandpa, right?"

"Uh huh. I love you too." Sophie nuzzled him and kissed his cheek.

"And I love you." Kurt added, tickling her side. "Very, very much."

"Alright. Let's get Miss Sophia in the car." Burt said, taking Sophia and opening the car door.

"Come here!" Kurt exclaimed, bending down and opening his arms. Nicky jumped into them, arms going around Kurt's neck. "Oof, you're so heavy!"

Nicky giggled, hugging Kurt tightly. "I'm not that big, Daddy."

"You're growing up on us." Kurt squeezed him. "My big boys. What will Dad and I ever do when you move out, hmm?"

"I'm gonna live in the garden shed!" Nicky exclaimed.

"We don't have a garden shed." Zachy, who was being snuggled by Blaine, said.

"Well we'll just have to build one for him." Kurt kissed Nicky's cheek.

"I'm going to miss you, Daddy! But Grandpa will let me stay up late, so you can stay a few extra days if you want!" Nicky hugged him.

"Gee, that makes me feel so loved." Kurt teased. "I love you, Pooh Bear."

"_Dad_dy!_" _Nicky looked around, as if making sure outsiders didn't hear. "Don't call me that."

"I'm sorry, Booger Butt." Kurt hugged him again.

"Kurt, we've really gotta go." Blaine said, switching children with Kurt.

"Bye, Daddy!" Zachy said, hugging Kurt tightly.

"You can ask grandpa for warm milk if you need to." Kurt said, kissing the top of Zachy's head. "You make sure that Nicky doesn't drive Grandma up the wall?"

"I'll try." Zachy said, scrunching his nose up when Kurt kissed his cheek.

"Daddy loves you very much." Kurt said as Blaine got Nicky situated in the car. "And I'll see you all in a few days and we'll call in the morning."

"Go, go, go." Burt said, laughing. "Drag him away, Blaine, before he starts to rethink the trip."

"He's worse than Sophie. It's where she gets it." Blaine whispered loudly, causing the twins to giggle and Sophie to pout.

"_Fine_." Kurt sighed.

"Uh oh. Daddy's saying fine." Nicky said. "Dad and Grandpa are in trouble."

"Because Daddy's boss." Blaine said, grabbing Kurt's hand and waving at the kids. "Be good!"

"And we love you!"

"_Go_." Burt said, pointing in the opposite direction.

…

"Would you not _do _that?" Kurt snapped two days later, glaring down at the menus that the waiter had been too preoccupied flirting with _his _husband to pick up.

"Stop what?" Blaine asked, looking confused.

"_That_." Kurt said.

"What is _that_?"

"That waiter was hitting on you and you just let him do it." Kurt hissed. "I get that you're getting more attractive with age meanwhile I look like _this_," Kurt gestured at himself. "But you could at least have the respect for me to not let some guy flirt with you in front of me!"

"He was just being friendly and telling us places we could see. Don't you want to make the best of the trip?"

"You are so oblivious." Kurt sighed, shaking his head and then taking a drink of his water.

"No. You're just grumpy because you miss the kids. You get like this every time we leave them. You don't have to feel guilty, Kurt. We can have time to ourselves. This is our _tenth anniversary_. We deserve this, don't you think?" Blaine asked, grabbing his hand and squeezing it. "We'll call home as soon as we get back to the room, alright?"

Maybe Blaine was right. After all, he _did _feel guilty for leaving the kids at home with his parents and sister. How was he supposed to _not _feel guilty when Sophie had sobbed into the phone for a full ten minutes begging them to come home? Why hadn't they just made it into a family vacation? And even if he did feel guilty, it didn't mean he had to take it out on Blaine. This trip was supposed to be about spending time together and celebrating them—their love, their life.

"Yeah. Sorry." Kurt said. "I guess I'm a little tired and grumpy."

"Well there wasn't much sleep happening last night." Blaine winked and then gave Kurt a warm smile.

"I love you." Kurt leaned forward, pressing his lips to Blaine's as the waiter came up with their food.

"I got to think that you might also visit The Reina Sofia." The young waiter said eagerly, making eye contact with Blaine and not so much glancing in Kurt's direction. He then glanced at Blaine's left hand, spotted his wedding ring without a doubt, and then he continued talking. "Two of Picasso's pieces are there. _Guernica_ and _Woman in Blue_." His eyes very clearly glanced down at Blaine's lap and then badk up. He smirked a bit. "They're quite the sight to see."

Kurt gritted his teeth. This was _their _trip. Their tenth wedding anniversary. Kurt was sitting _right there _and some twenty something year old thought that they could do that? And Blaine, the clueless and oblivious thing that he must have been to not notice, just _let him_?

No.

Just no.

He could take Blaine politely hearing the guy blabber on about sights because yes, he knew his husband was _too _nice to people nearly 100% of the time. He could take the fact that his husband drew attention everywhere he went—because Blaine was fucking _gorgeous, _so of course. And sometimes Kurt _liked_that people looked at Blaine because despite all of those eyes, Blaine was his. Blaine went home with him, lived with him, had three beautiful children with him. And Kurt could even handle a pathetic twenty-something year old flirting with his husband. But what he could _not _take was Blaine letting said pathetic creeper asshole look at his _lap_, smirk like that, and continue on with a conversation.

Just. No.

Kurt grabbed his drink and, without even really thinking about it, threw it in Blaine's face. He tossed the plastic cup onto the ground and stormed off.

Really, he was too old to be acting like that. Then again, it seemed to have got the message across when he thought back to Blaine's bewildered face.

"How old are we?" Blaine snapped, running up after him and grabbing his hand gently, in an effort to stop him from moving away.

"A lot older than that little boy who was just staring at your dick." Kurt snapped right back.

Blaine wiped his face on a towel that he now had with him, muttering something about wondering if he had to take it back to the restaurant. "Should I walk around with a box around my pelvic area, Kurt? Would that make you happy?"

"What would make me happy is if you paid more attention to _me _on our wedding anniversary than that little brat." Kurt said, freeing his arm from Blaine's grasp.

"I'm sorry! I've never been to Spain before. I just want to see stuff while we're here. When do we ever get to actually _look _at something without Sophie clawing at our eyeballs or Zachy picking up random bugs or Nicky attempting to throw himself dramatically off of bridges?" Blaine exclaimed.

"Then talk to a tour guide or find a brochure." Kurt took a deep, calming breath. In and out. In and out.

"Alright." Blaine said, crossing over to a stand and selecting four brochures. He then gave Kurt an adorable smile. "See? Brochures. But there's a guy on the front of this one. Is that allowed? He might try to get in my pants."

Kurt shook his head, fighting a smile himself. "Well he's not as young as the waiter and he's ugly, so I guess we can use that brochure."

"Good because the other one had a bunch of kids on the cover and if I can't be with my own children, I want to be completely child free for the remainder of the week." Blaine said cheerfully, wiping some excess water out of his hair. "Thanks for that, by the way. That water really cooled me down. It had been stuffy in there."

"You know me. I'm always looking for new and exciting ways to be dramatic. I have to keep you on your toes." Kurt laughed a bit and laced fingers with Blaine. "If I'd known you were going to surpass me in the looks department, Blaine Anderson-Hummel, we may not have got engaged."

"Eh." Blaine kind of shrugged. "Then I would have proposed to you, kidnapped you, and forced you into marriage. Either way, I was going to make you mine. This just let me take the easier route."

Kurt rolled his eyes.

"By the way, though, I'm not the only one getting more attractive with age." Blaine said very seriously. "In fact, I can't figure out why you haven't left me for some designer who makes more money than me and looks better than me."

"I do it for the kids." Kurt nudged Blaine gently, winking.

"It's a good thing I made such attractive babies then, isn't it?" Blaine grinned, hazel eyes bright as he leaned over to kiss Blaine.

"Mhmm." Kurt wrapped his arms around Blaine's neck, kissing him. "Otherwise, you'd have to do your own suit shopping and laundry."

"The horror." Blaine squeaked, kissing down Kurt's neck.

"Do you really want to go to that museum?" Kurt asked, pulling away and giggling.

"Nah." Blaine shook his head. "I was never a big fan of Picasso."


	91. Babies: Watching Blaine's Case on TV

"THE SNACKS! I FORGOT THE POPCORN!" Five year old Nicky shrieked, running for the kitchen and coming back with a huge bowl of popcorn.

"We're not supposed to have food on the couch." Three year old Sophie huffed. "If Daddy comes in, we'll get into trouble."

"Dad is going to be on the TV and Daddy is on the phone with Aunt Rachel. It could be ages." Zachy said eagerly.

"Daddy's on TV?" Sophie gasped. "Why?"

"He's gon' yell at people!" Zachy clapped his hands together.

"Plus, we're not on the couch." Nicky said, plopping on the floor. "TURN ON THAT TV!"

Zachy grabbed the remote, flipping until he found the appropriate channel, and then slid onto the floor next to his twin. "Gimme popcorn."

"Don't eat it all, _Munchie_. Daddy says you eat as much as Dad."

"It's true." Sophie hopped down, moving between them and forcing them apart so she could sit in the middle. "Bowl, please!"

"It's Dad!" Zachy exclaimed.

"DADDY!" Sophie shrieked happily, hopping up and down. "Daddy, Daddy, Daddy!"

"Shh!" Zachy and Nicky said, Nicky pulling her down.

"But why's Daddy on TV? Why?"

"Work." Zachy whispered as Nick waved his little hand to shush them.

"DADDY!" Sophie squealed as the TV showed Blaine again. "Daddy, Daddy, Daddy!"

"Shh!" Nicky said. "We don't wanna miss when he gets mad."

"Why?" Sophie tilted her head to the side and blinked at him with hazel eyes.

"'Cause it's funny when it's not at me." Nicky giggled. "Hey! Hey, watch this, Zachy!"

"Don't. Last time you got into—trouble." Zachy finished as Nicky threw popcorn in the air and managed to catch a whopping _none _in his mouth.

"Fifty second rule!" Nicky said, scooping the pieces up and shoving them eagerly into his mouth.

"It's the _five _second rule." Zachy said.

"Daddy!" Sophie squealed, kicking her little legs up and down excitedly and clapping her hands. "That's my tie! I gotted it for him!"

"Got." Zachy said, pushing three pieces of popcorn in her mouth to make her be quiet.

"Yummy!" Sophie cheered.

"Uh oh. There it goes." Nicky said, flailing his hand to quiet them.

"Dad's mad face." Zachy gasped. "Uh oh. He's in trouble now."

"GET HIM, DADDY!" Nicky chanted. "GET HIM! GET HIM!"

"That judge is ugly." Sophie chimed in, hiding her face behind Nicky's shoulder. "And scary. Will Daddy catch the ugly?"

Blaine said something to the judge who nodded. Blaine got a rather triumphant smirk on his face and the camera flashed to the other lawyer, who look pissed.

"THAT'S OUR DAD! YEAH! TAKE THAT, DUMMY!" Nicky yelled, jumping to his feet and doing a dance.

"It's not over yet." Zachy sighed, tugging him back down. "I'm pretty sure this is just the beginning."

"Well he's on a roll!" Nicky pointed at the screen. "You are. On. A. Roll!"

"What's that mean?" Sophie asked, tugging at his arm.

"I 'unno. Daddy says it a lot." Nicky shrugged.

…

"Are we ready for this?" Fifteen year old Nick called the second they made it into the house.

Thirteen year old Sophie sighed and set her backpack down. "I have Algebra homework. Can you help me, Zach?"

"After the trial." Zach grabbed a bag of chips and three sodas. "Dad better make this guy's life a living hell for the last month he's put Dad through is all I have to say."

"Oh, he will. He's ready for this to be done." Nick grabbed some popcorn and put it in the microwave.

"Will you two ever _not _watch a trial that is aired when we're not in school?" Sophie sighed. "They're usually boring."

"I'm telling you, Soph. It is _amazing _to watch Dad get angry at someone who isn't me." Nick grinned.

"But he doesn't _always _get mad." Sophie protested. "In fact, he usually_doesn't."_

"But it's _amazing _when he does." Nick said. "Shut up and turn the TV on."

Sophie scoffed and sat on the couch, snuggling up to Zach who was already finding the channel. "You can't tell me to shut up."

"I just did." Nick plopped on the couch and dropped the bowl of her popcorn in her lap seeing as she was in the middle.

"Aw, Daddy looks so cute in his little suit." Sophie cooed.

"I told him to wear the Harry Potter tie since he was going to be on television but apparently that wouldn't have been appropriate." Zach mock sighed and shook his head, opening his can of soda.

"It doesn't technically _look _like its Harry Potter. It looks like two five year olds and one three year old tried to make it _look _like Harry Potter." Nick said, tossing three pieces of popcorn into the air and catching all of them.

"It shows his sensitive side." Sophie said, punching his arm halfheartedly. "And that _is _what it is. If you hadn't felt the need to contribute so much,_Pooh Bear_, it wouldn't have looked as bad."

"Shows his sensitive side? The entire world knows he is gay because Daddy is a famous designer and Daddy can't keep his mouth shut about his 'beautiful husband and kids' in interviews. They probably know more about Dad's sensitive side than we do." Zach snorted.

"I know Daddy and I are beautiful, but I don't know what he sees in you two." Sophie teased, reaching up and ruffling Zach's curls and Nick's straight hair.

"_Don't call me Pooh Bear._" Nick said darkly, messing her hair up.

"_Pooh Bear, Pooh Bear, Pooh Bear_!" Sophie and Zach chanted together. "_Pooh Bear, Pooh Bear_!"

"You two make my life so difficult." Nick said, mock scowling.

"Well I'm still mad you kicked me so hard in soccer practice yesterday." Zach huffed. "Would you like to see the bruise again?"

"No thank you. And I'm still mad your guinea pig doesn't know how to shut the hell up." Nick huffed right back before making loud screeching noises.

"Don't make fun of my guinea pig." Zach pouted.

"Can I make fun of your cat?"

"No."

"Your snake eggs?"

"They are lizard eggs, for your information. And _shh_. Daddy still doesn't know about those and he's in his office. It's Tuesday."

"Ah, darn. You know he hates it when we watch Dad's trials." Nick frowned.

"No. _Dad_ hates it because _you_ follow him around spouting off random numbers and words like they are laws and yell quotes from inaccurate television shows." Sophie corrected.

"I'm sure he appreciates my interest in his career. It is, after all, paying for my education and my extra soccer lessons so I can get into school on a soccer scholarship. Right, Zach?"

"Meh." Zach shrugged. "Good luck with that. I plan to be done with soccer after we graduate—if I even make it that lo—mmph!"

"Shh! Daddy's talking!" Sophie said, clasping her hand over Zach's mouth.

They all three watched interestedly until Nick stood up and pointed to the screen. "You just made him mad, sir, and he's going to _take you down_!" he declared. "I hope Uncle David is watching this. He appreciates it when Dad's angry too."

"Uh oh, Daddy's _pissed_." Sophie said.

"It's so nice when he uses that tone of voice and it's aimed at someone other than me." Nick said, plopping back down and eating some more popcorn.

"I thought I heard children down here watching things Blaine doesn't like you to watch." Kurt laughed coming into the room.

"It just got good, Dad." Zach said, scooting so Kurt could sit down. "You're just in time."

"Yeah. The Evans lawyer just said something that made him get _The Face_." Nick added eagerly.

"_The face_? If Blaine needed any push to win this one, he'll have it." Kurt said as the camera zoomed in on Blaine again. "Oh, God. He is _pissed_. He better win this or we'll hear about it for _weeks_."

"Or you can make him forget about it with… well, you know." Nick said, wiggling his eyebrow.

"This just got very awkward." Sophie moaned, covering her face.

"_Blergh_." Zach said, glaring at Nick. "Thanks for the mental images."

"Your room is across from theirs. Like you've never heard it if _I _have." Nick shrugged and then said, trying to sound like Blaine, "Children and father, sex is just a part of life. And either way, Dad is going to get sex—either congratulatory, happy sex or angry, pity sex. I suggest finding your headphones and making sure they're handy, brother and sister, because after the goodnights and I love you's, it's _on_."

"Have I mentioned how much simpler and quieter my life would be without you lately, Nick?" Kurt asked.

"Daily." Nick grinned.

"I blame Daddy's sperm for this." Sophie sulked. "I wish I had sisters."

"Hey now. Zach is like a carbon copy of Dad, so you pretty much do." Nick teased.

"Oh yeah?" Zach said, reaching over Sophie and punching Nick hard in the shoulder. "What was that?"

"Come on. The curls, the reading, the borderline scary devotion to animals. If you were gay, I would be under the impression that Dad cloned you." Nick shrugged, rubbing his shoulder. "And that_ hurt_."

"Shut up, Dad's on." Kurt said, leaning over also and shaking Nick's shoulder. "This is why I don't like you drinking soda. It makes you the hyperactive son that I absolutely adored when you were four."

"If you loved me when I was four, why wouldn't you want me to act that way?" Nick grinned.

"Because Daddy can only take so much before his head explodes." Kurt said very seriously. "Now shh and watch the television. Let's agree to not tell Dad we watched this, alright?"

"Deal." Nick, Zach, and Sophie all said together.

…

"According to Hopkins Law 35 point 4 dash 3 trillion, you are _wrong_!" Nicky declared four hours later when the front door opened a crack.

"Oh, God. I'm going back to work."


	92. Announcement

"What if they do that whole 'you're too young' thing?" Kurt complained in a hushed whisper.

"I'm thinking they'll go for the 'You're not even married yet' thing but that's just me." Blaine shrugged.

"They know we're about to tell them something that isn't house related. They keep giving each other looks."

"Maybe they think I'm making you sign a prenup." Blaine snorted loudly.

"I keep telling you I will."

"And I keep telling you that you're crazy." Blaine took a deep breath. "But maybe we are crazy. We're not even married yet and we've already picked out a surrogate. I mean, that's _crazy_."

"It's not unlike a bride who is pregnant at the altar. We're just going to have to pay for a lot more than a condom that didn't work." Kurt pointed out. "Besides, if we hadn't wanted a wedding for the exact month and time we chose, we could have been married three months ago."

"Yeah, for a lot less too." Blaine muttered.

"Well you said to blow as much as that money as we wanted and we've both agreed on all the details…"

"And you've changed at least a third of them…" Blaine grinned and slid his arms around Kurt's waist, eyes twinkling.

"Shut up." Kurt laughed, kissing him.

"No." Blaine laughed as well.

"You need to let your hair grow out more. Ever since you started working your own cases, you keep it really short." Kurt pouted a bit.

"It's easier to keep up with this way." Blaine explained.

Kurt gave a small scowl and then pulled back. "Should we go and talk to them now?"

"Yeah, I think so. Otherwise they'll be convinced the wedding is off. You were pretty grumpy when we got in last night." Blaine tickled Kurt's side.

"Stop." Kurt giggled and pulled away from Blaine, exiting the bedroom. "I hope Finn didn't spoil it."

"Dude, I told you I wasn't gonna spoil the baby news." Finn, who had picked that moment to exit his own old bedroom, said. "Were you two going at it? Your shirt's messed up, Kurt."

"Blaine, I told you that when—Nevermind." Kurt shook his head.

Finn snorted loudly as Blaine came out of the room. "The answer, Finn, is _I wish_."

"Oh my God. You act like we're celibate or something. We've had more sex since we moved into the house in New York than we've _ever _had." Kurt, who had started walking towards the stairs again, turned to face Finn and Blaine. "If you two high five, you will both regret it."

"That'd be totally immature." Finn said as he fist-bumped Blaine.

"That was much more age appropriate, Kurt." Blaine smiled adorably.

"Are you three bickering already?" Carole asked from the foot of the stairs. "Finn, are Rachel and Bella up yet? I want to see the precious baby."

"Thanks, Mom." Finn groaned as Bella started to cry for him. "She is _now_."

"Whoops." Carole said cheerfully, not looking apologetic in the least.

"Good luck, little bro." Finn bumped shoulders with Kurt and turned back towards his old room. The crying grew louder as the door opened and faded once it had been shut again.

"What a shame she woke up." Carole tsked as she, Kurt, and Blaine made their way into the kitchen.

Burt shook his head. "You've debated stealing the baby ever since you woke up. I don't think anyone's buyin' it, Carole."

"Can't I want to spend time with my grandchild? These three are only down from New York a few times a year." Carole asked. She then draped her arm around Kurt's shoulders. "You visit Bella all the time, don't you?"

"Of course not." Kurt lied.

"Ha!" Blaine laughed. "Every free moment he has he wants to go into the city to 'chat music with Rachel' which means hold Bella."

"How are wedding plans coming? Are you sure you only want us to pay for the honeymoon, boys? The garage is doing real good this year." Burt asked, looking excited. He always looked excited when talking about Kurt and Blaine's upcoming nuptials and hardly talked about anything else when they were both in a room with him.

"We're still going back and forth on cake, tuxedos, and rings." Kurt supplied, sitting at the table.

"He's putting way too much thought into it." Blaine added. "He keeps going between three rings but he's been to Tiffany's to stare at one five times with me, probably more without me, but he won't commit… And he's being very picky with tuxes."

"It's our _wedding_, Blaine."

"I know, I know. But time is running out and pretty soon checks have to be made out to get the stuff in time. That's all I'm saying." Blaine held his hands up defensively and then shot Burt a look.

Burt chuckled. "Shoulda known he'd act like that, Blaine."

"Yeah but he's been planning the thing since two weeks after we got engaged."

"These things take _time_." Kurt sighed, putting his hand on Blaine's leg after he had sat next to him.

"It would take less time if you'd write the options in a hat and pull one out." Blaine grinned.

"I wish you'd take this a bit more seriously." Kurt shook his head.

"Let me have a chocolate cake and I'll take it more seriously."

Kurt removed his hand from Blaine's thigh and massaged his forehead.

"Don't get stressed out, Kurt." Blaine lowered his voice and pulled Kurt's hand down. "I'm joking."

"That's half the problem." Kurt sighed as Blaine kissed his cheek.

"Don't worry, hon. The wedding will be _perfect_." Carole reassured Kurt. "You've got _plenty _of time to finish."

"Pretty soon our energies will be focused… elsewhere." Blaine cut in.

"Elsewhere?" Burt questioned, eyebrow arching.

"I told you there was a reason behind these two, Finn, and Rachel coming. There's always a reason." Carole said. "Are one of you two sick? Blaine, has your concussion caused problems?"

Blaine's eyebrow arched. "Concussion?"

"From the really bad wreck you had last week."

"_Oh_." Blaine waved his hand in the air. "No. It wasn't even a concussion."

"It was so." Kurt rolled his eyes. "You're so stubborn."

"What's going on?" Burt asked before Blaine could correct Kurt again. If the two ended up bickering, who knew how long it'd be before he and Carole found out what was going on.

"Well…" Kurt looked at Blaine.

Blaine grinned. "We've done a lot of thinking about the future with the wedding coming up."

"Are you two buying that house? It was so beautiful, Kurt!" Carole interrupted.

"Well, we are buying the house." Kurt said. "But that's… not all we're buying."

"We know you're buying a new car." Burt snorted loudly at Blaine's sheepish expression.

"We've done a lot—a _lot—_ of thinking and we've decided we're ready to have a baby." Kurt said, eyes lighting up.

Carole let out a shriek, hugging Kurt and then hugging Blaine.

"Wait, wait, wait. You two aren't even married yet." Burt's eyes widened.

"By the time the baby gets here, we will be." Kurt laughed.

"How long have you been planning this?" Burt questioned.

"Several months." Blaine said. "We looked into _every _available option, I had people look into stuff, and we've decided to go with a surrogate that we both know. The baby will be born about four to six months after the wedding depending on if it… you know… is the right word 'takes'?"

"That soon?" Carole asked. "Oh my God. Boys, you're this far into planning this and we're just finding out?"

"We wanted to make sure we'd be able to realistically do it before we told you all." Kurt explained. "Because we know how _Dad _gets when he's excited about something. We didn't want to hit a road block and disappoint anyone."

Burt stood, going to give Kurt a big hug. "You're gonna be a daddy?"

"As long as she doesn't back out and it works, yeah." Kurt said, happy tears filling his eyes.

"We're really, really excited." Blaine said. "Bob's done a lot of asking around for us and he found us someone very experienced to handle the legal aspects. Most of the paperwork has been submitted."

"Who is going to carry your baby?" Carole asked, hugging Kurt when Burt went to hug Blaine.

"Quinn." Kurt wiped his eyes and sniffled a bit, face broken out into a happy smile.

"That's not it. That's not it." Blaine said excitedly. "We're going to have _two_. There'll be the first baby and 15 months later the other one of us will… do _it… _so we can have a second baby two years later."

"Which we realize will be hard since the babies will be close in age but Blaine never had a close relationship with his brother—well not in the beginning—and age played a big part in that. So we want our kids to be close in age." Kurt sniffled again, smiling even more when Blaine wrapped his arms around him.

"Finn and Rachel do know but apart from David and Wes, they're the only ones." Blaine said.

"We're going to be grandparents again!" Carole beamed. "This is so _exciting_!"

Kurt laughed.

"How does it work?" Burt questioned. "Does she have parental rights?"

"No, none. She's the egg donor and that's it." Blaine said. "We're paying her expenses while she's pregnant, any expenses pertaining to the surrogacy and birth, and a very… high price for the baby, but it's more than worth it."

"Don't ask how expensive it is. You don't want to know." Kurt said as Burt opened his mouth to ask.

"So, when does it happen?" Carole asked.

"We're in the last stages of finalizing everything. We have to sign some papers, decide who wants to be the biological father of the first baby, and wait for the doctor to schedule an appointment." Blaine explained.

"So it could be less than a year?!" Carole squealed. "Oh my _God_, boys!"

"It'll probably be longer than that!" Kurt said quickly before Burt could get too excited. "We're not exactly sure quite yet but… but soon."

Burt hugged both Kurt and Blaine again. "I'm in shock! I thought they were gonna tell us they were buying the house or building a new one or somethin'! I don't even know what to say!"

"It's okay, Dad. We didn't know what to say for like two weeks when we found out it was happening." Kurt said.

"Now it's most of what we talk about." Blaine grinned.

"Have you two started reading books and going to classes?" Carole asked eagerly.

"Not yet. There's still so much to do on the wedding and finalizing doctor's appointments and Kurt works 56 hours a week, I work 52." Blaine sighed. "We're so busy but it's…"

"On the list." Kurt finished.

"The very long list." Blaine added.

"We're taking everyone out to dinner tonight. We'll go to a real nice place!" Burt announced.

"And we're stopping at Barnes and Noble and getting you two every single book they have—Believe me, you'll need to read them all." Carole squealed.

"Will you let us pay for the parenting classes? You gotta let us." Burt asked eagerly.

"And I'd love to stay with you two for a few weeks just to help you all get situated with the little one, make sure you get some sleep." Carole looked excited.

"That sounds wonderful." Kurt nodded. "On all accounts."

"I'm happy for you, kid. Even if it seems a bit rushed you two have been together since you were in high school. Frankly, you've just taken too long to get hitched."

"Yeah, Kurt." Blaine winked.

"Shut up, you." Kurt laughed, kissing him. "Don't you even joke about that!"

"Oh, good! It looks like everyone heard the news!" Rachel squealed coming into the room with her nearly year old daughter in her arms. "Isn't it amazing?"

"Two—Four, really— of our babies are having babies, Burt! What on Earth will we do when Melody has a baby?" Carole asked.

"Don't even joke about that." Burt said.

"Don't joke about what?" Melody yawned, coming into the room. "Dad, why aren't you at work?"

"Because Kurt and Blaine are having a baby!"

"I know." Melody shrugged.

"What do you mean, you know?" Kurt asked, shooting Blaine a look. "Blaine, did you tell her?"

Blaine shook his head, confused.

"Finn did." Melody smiled sweetly as Finn came into the room.

"Dude, I had to tell_ somebody_. You can't just expect me to keep a secret like that." Finn said.

"I woulda figured it out on my own. Who makes a trip to talk about buying a_house_?" Melody asked, looking at Kurt and Blaine like they were dumb.

"I told you we needed a better excuse." Kurt muttered.

"Just because I'm a lawyer doesn't mean I'm smart." Blaine shrugged. "Who wants to go out for breakfast? Kurt's paying!"

"Of course Kurt is." Kurt laughed.

"Hey, should we disclose how much of a down payment _I_ just made on our offspring?"

"Please don't because if you do, I'll probably vomit and nobody will want to eat after that." Kurt said, grabbing his keys off of the counter.

"Really, though, how much is it?" Burt asked grabbing his own keys as well since there was no way they'd all fit into Kurt's car.

Blaine leaned in, whispering something in Burt's ear.

"Hope there's a warranty on that." Burt choked out as Blaine pulled away.

"You and me both, Burt. You and me both."


	93. Babies Warning: Beach

"Do you really think It's the smartest idea in the world to go anywhere near a large body of water with your son?" Kurt questioned, packing up a bag of clothes for Sophie in her bedroom.

"Zach will be fine. Plus, he'll love the starfish." Blaine yelled across the hall, where he was packing bags for the twins.

"I'm talking about your child who jumped off of the top of the stairs five months ago and broke his arm in three places."

"What? I can't hear you."

"Screw it." Kurt stood, dropping the Tangled backpack onto Sophie's floor and making his way across the hall and into the twins' bedroom. "I said that I am referring to Nicky, who jumped off of the top of the stairs last fall and broke his arm in three places."

"Nick is fine."

"Nick is a _wild child_.If we can't keep up with him in our own house, how can we in a beach house that probably has a porch?" Kurt sighed, sitting on the floor by Blaine.

"We need a nice family vacation. Especially _you_. You've worked too hard."

"Disney World would have been a better option for two seven year olds and a four year old."

"Yes but this is a better option for relaxing."

"Fine, fine." Kurt sighed a bit.

"You worry too much." Blaine looked at him.

"They're my babies."

"They're my babies too." Blaine pointed out. "And they're going to be _so excited_when they get home and we tell them."

Kurt leaned over, head resting on Blaine's shoulder. "Can we at least stop at a Cheesecake Factory on the way?"

"Do you know how expensive it is for five people to eat at the Cheesecake Factory?" Blaine asked, putting some of the boys' clothes into a bag—and yes, this bad was not nearly as neat as the one Kurt was working on for Sophie but_honestly _like the boys wouldn't have them wrinkled within mere seconds of putting them on anyway.

"Are you aware of how much money we have?" Kurt questioned. "We can get cheesecake."

"I want a new car and it's not practical to use the money, but you want_cheesecake _and it is?"

Kurt leaned over, kissing Blaine's cheek. "Pretty please?"

"Fine, you beggar. We will go out of the way to stop at a Cheesecake Factory."

"I knew there was a reason I married you." Kurt flashed Blaine a wide smile. "I'm almost done packing Sophie's bag. I'll be back to help in a minute."

"Okay." Blaine grinned and dumped half a drawer into the duffle bag he was packing when Kurt left the room. Who said he couldn't be time efficient?

…

"Nicky, look for jelly fish! They sting!"

"But I wanna pee on my foot, daddy! Dad said I can pee on my foot if one stings me!" Nicky protested.

"Come here. I need to put some more sunscreen on you." Kurt waved him over and turned to Blaine, who was holding his Nook over his face and reading. "You told him he could pee on his foot if he got stung by a jelly fish?"

"I'm exercising my right to remain silent." Blaine lowered his Nook.

"Well now your son is trying to find jelly fish on the shore." Kurt sighed a bit as Nicky ran up.

"Ready, daddy!" Nicky declared, plopping down on the sand directly in front of Kurt and Blaine's towel.

"Nicky, you can't seek out jelly fish." Blaine pushed himself into a sitting position.

"Drats." Nicky pouted.

"Daddy, I need more too!" Sophie ran up, squealing and sliding in the sand until she slid right into Blaine's side.

"Oof." Blaine fell onto his other side dramatically. "I've fallen and I can't get up."

"Like the old people on the commercials." Nicky giggled, raising his arms as Kurt put sunscreen on his sides. "Zachy's asleep, daddy."

"Well you three have run around all day." Kurt pointed out as Sophie crawled over Blaine, poking him in the face repeatedly.

"Ah, ah, it huuuurts!" Blaine exclaimed. "Ahhh, no, help!"

"Tickle tickle!" Sophie shrieked, putting her little hand on Blaine's side and beginning to tickle him.

Kurt let out a loud laugh when Blaine flailed, bursting into laughter. "Get 'im, Sophie!"

"I get you, Daddy! I get you, Daddy!" Sophie cheered before plopping on his chest.

"Ooph. You're squishing my insides." Blaine grunted, tickling her side.

Sophie flopped over, hugging him around the neck.

"At least one of my babies is sweet." Kurt laughed, patting Nick's shoulder. "Okay, sir. You're good. No jelly fish seeking, though. You're not getting in _my _car with pee on your leg."

"We brought Dad's car." Nick pointed out.

"Daddy's name is on the bill." Kurt smiled sweetly.

"Darn!" Nick said before running off, right to the shore.

"Are you sure he's okay down there?"

"He's not actually _in _the water." Blaine pointed at Nick, who giggled and stepped back any time the water reached his toes. "Little goober."

"Zach's over here snoring." Kurt laughed, briefly looking at Zach before watching Nick.

"Relax. He'll be fine… Besides, if you act like you never wanted to be stung by a jelly fish when you were little so you could pee on it, you're lying."

Kurt looked at him, face scrunched up in disgust. "You did?"

"I did and I stepped on one and got to pee on it. It was the proudest day of my eight year old _life_." Blaine said. "Until I had to go to the ER because it hurt so bad that I couldn't walk and Dad was afraid it was infected."

"Nick! Come closer to Daddy!" Kurt called, horrified.

"Daddy, I see a whale!"

"That's impossible." Blaine called. "It's a beach. Not an ocean."

"Whales can come up on beaches." Kurt hissed.

"Not _this _one."

Nicky ran up, shaking Zach until he was sitting up. "COME LOOK AT THE WHALE!"

"Whale?!" Zach jumped up and both twins ran to the shore, jumping up and down.

"They can't really see a whale."

"You're gullible. They're trying to get you to come check." Kurt said, pulling Sophie off of Kurt and snuggling him.

"Daddy, when we go to Disney World?"

"We went two months ago." Kurt pointed out, kissing her nose. "We'll go back the day after Christmas."

Sophie clapped her hands and moved her legs up and down excitedly.

"When you're a big girl, we'll only get to go to Disney World once a year instead of twice." Kurt pointed out.

"But that's _mean." _Sophie pouted.

"No." Blaine corrected. "That's financially conscious. Disney costs money."

"Grandpa says you have so much money you can use it as poo paper." Sophie whined. "So we can go three times a year."

Kurt snorted loudly, bending to rest his chin on her head.

"We can lives there too." Sophie said. "I can stay with Cinderelli in her castle."

"Daddy would rather stay with Princess Belle." Kurt winked at Blaine, who huffed.

"That is funny because—because Uncle David says Daddy is Princess Belle." Sophie gave Blaine a toothy grin.

"You're absolutely rotten." Blaine laughed.

"Nuh uh. I'm ripe."

Blaine bent, laughing into his knees.

"Hey, you two! Out of the water unless Dad or I are with you!" Kurt called.

"I-I-I'll go." Blaine gasped, shakily standing and running to the twins. He took both of their hands in his own and walked into the water with them, laughing more when they began to splash water on each other with their free hand.

"Wanna go in the water with Daddy and the boys?" Kurt asked, easing them both into a standing position.

"No." Sophie whined, reaching up.

"Even if I hold you the whole time?" Kurt scooped her up.

"I do not like water, Daddy." Sophie stuck out her lower lip.

"Daddy and I will be _right _there." Kurt promised, inching towards the water. "I swear."

Sophie put her thumb in her mouth, looking at Blaine and her brothers play.

"Looks like _fuuuun_." Kurt sang. "What if Daddy holds you?"

"No." Sophie wrapped her arms around Kurt's neck tightly. "You."

"Okay. Daddy will hold you the whole time." Kurt promised.

"Both arms."

Kurt laughed, tightening his grip on her as he made his way towards Blaine and the twins.

"Oh my." Blaine's hand flew to his chest. "Sophie's coming towards the water!"

Sophie whined, burying her face in Kurt's neck.

"Being mean to the baby." Kurt cooed, kissing the side of her face.

"Come here, baby." Blaine said, gently taking Sophie from Kurt. "We're going to sit right here and get our feet wet when the water moves up, okay?"

"NO NO NO NO NO!" Sophie shook her head.

"Just for a few seconds." Blaine urged, sitting with her on his lap where there was barely any water coming onto the shore.

"It's gonna be cold." Sophie whimpered as water came up. She then giggled. "It tickled, Daddy!"

"It tickled." Blaine laughed, ruffling her hair.

Sophie began kicking her feet and wiggling her toes in the wet sand.

"Told you the beach was a good idea." Blaine said, pointing at Sophie who was now gleefully giggling. "And you wanted to go to the Aquarium. Puh."

Zach's head shot up. "Aquarium? With animals?"

"No, dummy. With rocks." Nick said.

"I'm not a dummy, dummy!" Zach said, tossing a shell at Nick's head.

"Hey, hey, hey!" Kurt scolded, catching the shell in midair. "While I appreciate your aim, Zachary, throw at something that isn't your brother's _head, _alright?"

"It's so big it's an easy target." Zach stuck his tongue out at Nick when Kurt looked back to Nick, eyes rolling.

"Yeah well at least my hair isn't big and stupid." Nick stuck his own tongue out.

"Hey! Just because Zach and I have curls does not mean our hair is big an stupid! It's just _different_!" Blaine protested. "You're grounded, sir."

"You can't ground him for calling your hair big and stupid. What are you even going to ground him from? We're not home for him to watch TV." Kurt pointed out.

"No food or drink or air ever again." Blaine said, making his voice very stern. "Hey, you, stop breathing!"

"Stop me, stop me!" Nick took big gulps of air, moving closer to Blaine. "I don't see you stopping me!"

"You're so obnoxious." Blaine rolled his eyes, smiling.

Nick grinned proudly. "Daddy says I get it from you."

Blaine shot Kurt a look.

"He doesn't know what he's saying. He's only seven." Kurt shrugged one shoulder, looking innocent. "Does anyone want to head in for dinner?"

"If he gets obnoxiousness from me, Sophie gets her attitude from you." Blaine gathered Sophie in his arms and stood. "You two are one in the same, Kurt. All those nights you get in bed and say, 'And I wanted two girls,' you just remember that. She gets it _all from you_."

"Yes well Zach gets his obsession with animals from you." Kurt took one of each twins' hand and began walking next to Blaine.

"They're using us to fight again." Zach whined, sticking out his lower lip in a pout.

"We're not fighting." Kurt and Blaine said together.

"Are so." All three kids chimed.

"I will take air from _all of you_!" Blaine threatened, voice deep. "No breathing."

Kurt dropped Nick's hand and reached to smack Blaine upside the head when a nearby mother stared at them, clearly debating whether or not to call the police. "Ignore him. It's past his naptime. Comes with the old age."

"I am not old!" Blaine reached behind Kurt, smacking his butt and causing Kurt to yelp.

"Daddy spanked him again." Sophie said knowingly, looking down at her twin brothers from her new spot on Blaine's shoulders.

"Daddy touched the buttttt!" Zach and Nick chimed together.

"Blaine!" Kurt hissed.

"Sorry. You should keep that thing locked up or something. It just calls to me." Blaine grinned as they reached their belongings.

"I can't believe I'm stuck with you for the rest of my life." Kurt dramatically sighed.

Blaine's grin grew. "Bet it's gonna be a long and annoying one. I'm not going anywhere any time soon."

Nick leaned over, pretending to vomit.

"Better get used to it, kiddo. We acted like this long before you were here and we'll act like it long after you move out and have your own kids." Blaine said, reaching down and ruffling his hair.

"He's lying." Kurt said. "We used to at ever grosser."

"EWWW!" Nick and Zach scrunched up their noses as Sophie giggled adorably.

"Alright, packmules. Pick up your belongings. Last kid to the car has to drive home."

"But Daddy, we can't drive." Sophie said, gently tugging at Blaine's hair.

"Guess you better make it to the car before your brothers then." Blaine said, setting her on the ground. "Everybody grab something and run on the count of three. One… Two… Nick, I hadn't said three yet!"

"DADDY SAID THREE!" Sophie ran, arms flailing.

"Zach, guess you're driving." Blaine said, holding out the keys for Zach who was still picking up his towel.

"Aw darn!"


	94. Babies Warning: Bringing Home Sophie

"Her toes are so tiny." Blaine whispered, laying on the bed with his 9 day old daughter, touching her little toes. He'd done it a lot in the hospital but now that it was her first day home, he couldn't seem to stop. It was just that her fingers and toes were so _tiny _and the twins hadn't had limbs this tiny in… well, 22 months.

"And her hair." Kurt carefully sat on the edge of the bed. "There's so much of it. All of our babies have had hairy heads."

Blaine looked at him and they both began to giggle silently. Hairy heads. That was kind of the idea, wasn't it?

Kurt fell back into a laying position, groaning. "I can't believe we came home to a birthday party for you."

"Well the original did get cut short due to early labor." Blaine pointed out, running his finger over Sophie's nose. "She's got your nose."

"You keep saying she has my everything." Kurt rolled his eyes, smiling. He rolled onto his stomach so he could see them better. "I told you that you missed having a bitty baby."

"I don't miss having to dry clean my work clothes every time I wear them. And always having to change into another suit after coming home from my lunch." Blaine cooed, lifting Sophie a bit and kissing her head. "At least you can't pee in my mouth. Yes, that's right."

Kurt's smile grew when he heard little feet padding. He bent, seeing the shadow of four tiny feet under the door crack. "We have visitors… again."

"They're so funny." Blaine snorted. "Zach just wants to pet her head and Nick can't decide if he's excited or depressed she's here."

Kurt got up, quietly opening the door and holding his finger to his lips. "Be really quiet."

The two 22-month old babies toddled in, quickly going to the bed and looking up expectantly.

"Up, daddy!" Nick squeaked.

"Kiss baby!" Zach added, reaching his arms up for Kurt to pick him up.

"You already kissed baby night night." Kurt laughed but hoisted both boys onto the bed by Blaine.

"Baby." Nick crawled over, poking Sophie's cheek.

"Gentle." Blaine warned. "We don't want to make her cry."

Nick patted Sophie's chestnut colored hair. "No cry, Sophie."

Blaine let out a little laugh as Zach patted her hair as well. "Didn't I put you two to bed five minutes ago?"

"Uh huh." Zach nodded, hazel eyes wide as he stared at Sophie.

"Tell daddy you just wanted to see the Sophie baby." Kurt cooed, kissing the top of both of their heads.

"Hold Sophie baby?" Nick asked eagerly.

"You have to sit right on my lap." Kurt said, sitting back down on the bed. "One at a time, though."

"Me first!" They both said together.

"Nicky, you held her first when we got home so Zachy gets to hold her first right now. Okay?" Blaine asked.

"Yee!" Zachy squealed quietly, careful to not scare the baby, and all but plopped on Kurt's lap.

"Oof." Kurt grunted. "Alright. Baby us, Anderson."

"Anderson-_Hummel_." Blaine corrected as he and Kurt both eased the baby into the proper position on Zach's lap. "Got him, pumpkin?"

"Uh huh." Zachy beamed down at his sister. "She's _cute_!"

"And tiny." Nicky crawled over, wrinkling his nose at the baby's umbilical cord stump. "What's that?"

"Remember that Sophie had to eat when she was in the lady's tummy?" Kurt asked, one hand under Zach's arm and the other running through his dark curls. "There was a cord on that. They had to cut it and that's what's left. You had one too."

Nick's eyes widened and he pulled his nightgown shirt up.

"It fell off. Sophie's will probably fall off in a few days." Blaine laughed.

"She sicky?" Zach asked.

"Not anymore. She's perfectly healthy. That's why we were able to bring her home." Kurt smiled. "We just have to be extra careful with her because she's so tiny."

"Is it my turn?" Nick whined, sitting next to Kurt.

"My turn." Zach pouted.

"Why don't we let Nick have a turn?" Blaine asked. "You can hold her again tomorrow. She needs to go to sleep."

Zach reluctantly let Blaine take the baby and scooted off of Kurt's lap.

"My turn!" Nick cheered, sitting on Kurt's lap and thrusting his arms out.

"Now you remember how we showed you at the hospital." Blaine rolled his eyes, smiling.

"I forgot."

"Uh huh." Kurt laughed and arranged Nicky's arms. "Alright. We are ready, dada."

Blaine kissed Sophie's little head before putting her in Nick's arms. He about died when Nick bent over, placing a gentle kiss on the top of her head, and cooed, "I love you, baby!"

They definitely made the right decision, opting to keep the second pregnancy even though they got twins out of the first one.

They now had the perfect not-so-little family.


	95. Klaine Week: Early Klaine

"What's wrong Blaine?" Seven year old Kurt sat by Blaine on the grass. Usually Blaine played with Wes and David during recess but they were home sick. He had seen Blaine playing with Dave earlier but now he was in the corner of the recess yard, alone and crying.

"N-N-Nothing." Little Blaine watery hiccoughed, wiping his eyes. He then pulled his knees to his chest, looking away. Kurt was nice and everything but they weren't friends and playing with non-friends hadn't worked out too well for him just three minutes ago. Why should this time be any different?

"When I cry, something is always wrong." Kurt moved so he was sitting in front of Blaine and not beside him.

"I mi-miss Wes and D-David." He watery hiccoughed again, this time wiping his nose on the back of his hand.

(Even a seven year Kurt had to keep himself from cringing in horror. That was_completely_unsanitary.)

"Miss Stephanie said that they should feel better soon and be back. Mercedes is out too." Kurt informed him, trying to sound cheerful in an attempt to make Blaine feel better. He knew how it was being without your friends at recess… although Mercedes was really his only friend. "Hey, your knee is bleeding."

"Dave p-pushed me because I d-don't k-know how t-to play football." Blaine began to cry again. "M-My daddy n-never showed me!"

"My daddy played in school! He can show you!" Kurt said excitedly, hopping into a standing position. He then added, "And that wasn't very nice of Dave."

Blaine shook his head, dark curls bouncing. He spoke in a soft voice. "No. It wasn't."

"You're cute."

Blaine looked up at him, tears stopping mostly out of shock.

"Your eyes are really pretty and your hair makes them brighter." Kurt informed him. "And your outfits always look good too! My mommy would have liked them."

Blaine looked at him, confused. "Where is your mommy?"

"She's in the hospital a lot. She's sick." Kurt informed him, sitting back down and frowning. "And my daddy is with her a lot too. But don't tell anyone… I stay with Mercedes' mommy and daddy sometimes, and sometimes my aunts come from the city…"

"You can stay with my mommy and daddy too." Blaine sniffled, tensing as the football landed near them. He scooted back as Dave Karofsky ran up, his big friends behind him. He didn't want to get pushed down again. He didn't know why he'd even tried to play with stupid Dave.

"It's the _giiiirls_!" Dave sneered, reaching for his ball.

Kurt glared and picked the ball up. "It's not nice to hit people, Dave."

"Give me the ball. I don't have to listen to a _girl_." Dave stepped towards him.

Kurt threw the ball, hitting Dave directly in the head. "That's for hitting my friend." He then kicked Dave. "And that's for having a big head!"

Blaine's jaw dropped. He knew violence wasn't good in any way, shape, or form because his mommy and daddy had taught him for since he was a little kid. So why did it make him feel so excited that Kurt had taken up for him—or maybe it was the fact that Kurt had said he was Kurt's _friend_? Kurt was nice and had always made him laugh. And who didn't want three friends instead of two?

"Come on." Kurt said, grabbing the hand that Blaine hadn't used to wipe his nose. "Let's go play on the swings. I can tell you about my tiara collection."

"You have a tiara collection?" Blaine gasped, mouth forming a perfect O as they walked away from the mean boys. "Don't tell David and Wes, but I have a Disney Princess Barbie doll collection… and I have the princes too. They're hidden in the back of my closet!"

"That's where my tiara collection is hidden!" Kurt gasped this time. "Do you have Prince Eric?"

"Uh huh. My daddy found it for me when he was away at work."

"I HAVE ALWAYS WANTED ONE!" Kurt yelped. "Can I play with it sometimes?"

"Uh huh!" Blaine grinned adorably, climbing onto a swing (with a bit of effort seeing as he was so tiny—usually Wes or David had to help him onto the bigger kid swings).

Kurt clapped excitedly before climbing onto the swing next to Blaine's.

Finally, he and Blaine were friends! _And_Blaine had Disney Barbie dolls!

Maybe they could get married.

Then again, Kurt was pretty sure they were too young for _that_.


	96. Klaine Week(Baby Warn) Fairytale Klaine

"Daddy, what's a fairytale?" Kurt and Blaine's daughter, Sophie, asked pulling herself onto the couch next to Blaine one evening after school.

Blaine, who had been busy looking over paperwork for a case, smiled and sat his papers on the coffee table. "Well, lovebug, it's a happy story about magical things or places."

"I've never heard a fairy tale before, Daddy." Sophie said, crawling onto his lap and making herself comfortable. "Tell me one."

"You've heard _plenty _of fairytales, Sophia. You are a Disney child." Blaine laughed, ruffling her chestnut colored hair. "Cinderella, Rapunzel… those are fairytales."

"Tell me one." Sophie repeated, wiggling until she was comfortable.

"Okay, well… You remember that Cinderella—."

"No. Tell me one about you and Daddy." Sophie blinked up at him expectantly, looking so much like Kurt that it wasn't even funny.

Blaine looked at his daughter for a few moments, confused, before ruffling her hair again and clearing his throat. "Alright. A fairytale about me and daddy…"

Sophie watched him, waiting.

"Okay… Well, once there was a wealthy man named Grandpa who lived in a mansion with his wife Grandma, his son Kurt, his daughter Melody, and his stepson Finn." Blaine began, prompting giggles from his daughter. "Kurt, the second oldest of the three, was lovely and pure of heart. His brother wasn't quite all there in the head and his sister was more concerned with picking boogers than anything else."

"Aunt Melody." Sophie giggled.

"Yes, Aunt Melody." Blaine laughed. "The wealthy man lost a lot of his money and they had to give up their mansion to live in a one story house with only two rooms."

"I bet daddy didn't like that closet space."

"I bet you're right." Blaine snorted loudly and continued. "But not too long later, he heard word that some of his money might have been found. He just had to go into a place in the woods and find it. So Grandpa packed up a bag but before he left, he asked the kids what they wanted as a gift when he returned with the money. Naturally, Kurt said he wanted a rose because they reminded him of his birth mommy."

Sophie slid off of his lap and sat Indian style, eyes not leaving him.

"But Grandpa found out that all of his money was gone! He had gone for nothing!" Blaine raised his voice dramatically. "He was really sad but as he was heading back home, it got really dark and he found a castle in the woods."

"In Ohio?"

"Shh, this is a fairy tale." Blaine held his finger to her lips. "So Grandpa went into the castle and it didn't look like anybody was home, but there was a fire and a plate of warm food so he ate the food and sat by the fire. When he was on his way out, though, he found a rose bush and on it was only one rose!"

"Daddy wanted a rose!" Sophie squealed.

"Right! So Grandpa went to cut it off and when he turned around, a beast was there!" Blaine exclaimed, causing Sophie to shriek. "He told Grandpa that he had to die for stealing the rose, but Grandpa talked him into at least letting him take the rose to Daddy. So the Beast agreed to let Grandpa take gifts to Finn and Melody and also let him take the rose to Kurt but he told Grandpa that Kurt couldn't know what was happening. And then Grandpa had to return to be killed."

Sophie nodded, eyes wide.

"Now you know Daddy knows _everything_ so he got it out of Grandpa really fast. So Daddy went to the castle to beg for Grandpa's life and the Beast agreed to let him live if Daddy stayed in the castle forever!" Blaine paused.

"Oh no!" Sophie gasped.

"Oh, yes!" Blaine nodded. "But the Beast treated him very nicely. They had nice long talks over dinner and tea. He gave Daddy the best clothes, the best food, and he even let Daddy stay in his library—which was filled with only the best fashion magazines."

"But didn't Daddy miss Grandpa and Grandma and Finn and Melody?" Sophie frowned.

"He did. He missed them very much." Blaine nodded.

"Where were you?" Sophie tilted her head.

"I don't want to ruin the surprise, monkey." Blaine mock sighed, pretending to be annoyed. "Can I finish my story?"

"Fairytale." Sophie corrected. "And yes, you may."

Blaine grinned. "The Beast had fallen in love with Daddy, though. And he asked Daddy to marry him each and every day over dinner but Daddy always said no. Daddy couldn't marry the Beast because he wasn't human and besides, they were 'just friends.'"

"And he had to marry you!" Sophie said, standing on the couch and bouncing a bit until Blaine nudged her back into a sitting position. "Where were you, Daddy? Where were you? Did you save Daddy?"

Blaine cleared his throat. "Daddy kept having dreams, though. This handsome prince kept asking Daddy why he didn't want to marry the Beast, why he couldn't love the Beast, and Daddy kept saying that they were only friends."

"Daddy, are you the prince?" Sophie asked, kicking her feet excitedly.

Blaine continued on with his fairytale, refusing to give up the surprise. "But as I said before, Kurt missed his family very much and so he asked the Beast if he could go home to see them. At first the Beast didn't want to let Daddy go because he was afraid he wouldn't come back but eventually he told him that he _could _go, he just had to take two things with him."

"What two things, Daddy?"

"I'm getting there. I'm getting there." Blaine leaned over, picking up his water bottle from the coffee table and taking a drink of it. "The Beast told Daddy that he had to take a mirror which let him see what was going on in the castle at all times and also a silver ring that would take him back to the castle if he turned it three times."

Sophie watched Blaine demonstrate with his engagement ring. "Like that?"

"Just like that." Blaine nodded, letting her twist the ring on his finger too. "So Daddy went home to stay with his family for a week but Uncle Finn and Aunt Melody weren't very happy that Daddy had this nice life with the Beast. They wanted to make the Beast mad so he would come home and eat Daddy."

Sophie's eyes widened in horror.

"So they talked Daddy into staying an extra day." Blaine explained. "They even chopped onions to make it look like they were crying because they missed him. You know how Daddy is when he sees somebody crying."

Sophie nodded, hazel eyes still wide with horror at the prospect of a beast eating her father.

"So Daddy did stay an extra day but he began to feel bad for breaking his promise to the Beast. He used the mirror to look back at the castle, asking to see the Beast. He saw the Beast laying, half-dead from heartbreak! Right by the bush that had the rose Grandpa stole for Daddy!" Blaine said. "So Daddy used the ring and he—."

"Turned it three times?" Sophie asked, now on her knees, anxiously staring at Blaine.

"Yes! He turned it three times and it took her back to the Beast!" Blaine nodded. "He was almost dead and Daddy knelt by him on the ground, crying and saying that he loved the Beast. When Daddy cried and his tears got on the Beast, the Beast turned into the handsome prince from Daddy's dreams. The prince said his name was Blaine—."

"DADDY, YOU WERE THE PRINCE!"

Blaine laughed loudly before continuing. "And that a spell had put on him—well,_me_— years ago when I refused to let a fairy stay in the castle during a storm. The fairy said I would remain a beast until I found true love!"

"And when Daddy loved you back, it broke the curse!" Sophie clapped her hands.

"Exactly! Daddy and I got married and had three beautiful babies!" Blaine nodded. "The end."

"Daddy, that was a lot like Beauty and the Beast." Sophie hopped off of the couch.

"Well you didn't say my fairytale had to be original."


End file.
